James Roper Joins Us On The Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Podcast
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Introducing James Roper
James Roper is today’s guest joining us on the Steve Jobs inspired Join Up Dots podcast interview.
He is a man who has a burning passion to empower the world.
He has a belief that his talent and reason for being here, is to can inspire the youth of today that they do not have to, or should have to, accept the path that has been trod so many times before.
That path that takes you into jobs and responsibilities that society appears to say are the right ones to take.
The choices that need to be made because millions of people before have been told to do the same, and have done just that.
Ending up in uninspiring, soul destroying employment that is so far removed from their unique self.
After starting his first business at the age of 19, he has been able to live an entrepreneurial lifestyle by being diligent on all opportunities that are presented his way.
How The Dots Joined Up For James
In short he has managed to overcome the fear that root so many of us to spot.
And has created a kick ass life for himself in the process.
So as a published author of the best selling book The Productive Person Action Guide: How to be more productive and maximize your work-life balance in 2 weeks, and a stream of delighted clients and conferences halls all across America, how has he managed to do just that?
What has separated him from his target audience that just a few years previously he was sat amongst?
Well let’s bring onto the show to start joining up dots, as we discuss the words of Steve Jobs in todays podcast, with the one and only James Roper.
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with James Roper such as:
How work life balance is something that we should focus on from the very first moment of setting our path in life…not when we have got wrapped up in everything and can’t escape
How James believes that money is truly abundant and its just our self limiting beliefs that stop so many people believing this to be true in their own lives!
Why he first decided that he was going to follow in his fathers footsteps, but soon found out that it was not something that he could or should ever do
How due to his path he struggles with receiving compliments, not matter how generously they are paid to him!
How he believes that no matter how long your life is the quality of it is truly down to you and only you
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Audio Transcription James Roper Interview
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:27]
Hello, everybody. Yes, it Join Up Dots, Episode 170. It feels like seconds ago that it was 50. And then hundred and 50 770. If you are out there, you’re listening to the shows thinking, when’s he going to talk to so and so. And I haven’t been sent me an email, I’d suggest the names that you would like to get on the show. And we will do our very best to connect. And if there are people out there that you know extremely well and think would be a great fit for the show. also send them through and we will liaise with them and get them on as guests. Because we’re looking for the movers and shakers, visitors insiders and the people with a towel to tell liked today’s guest because I’d like to welcome to the show a man who at his core has a burning passion to empower. He has a belief that his talent and reason for being here is to inspire the youth of today and inspire them in a way that I do not have to or should have to accept the path has been tried so many times before, but path that takes you into jobs and responsibilities. But society appears to say, are the right ones to take the choices that need to be made just because millions of people being told to do the same and have done just bad over the years. And what happens they end up in uninspiring soul destroying employment that is so far removed from the unique self but I shouldn’t be in that position. Now guy after starting his first business at the age of 19. He’s been able to live an entrepreneurial lifestyle by being diligent on all opportunities that are presented he’s way so ensure he’s managed to overcome the fear that route so many of us to the spot. He’s created a kick ass life for himself in the process, which is great to see as a published author of the best selling book, the productive persons action guide how to be more productive and maximise your work life balance in two weeks, and a stream of delighted clients and conference halls all across America. And as he managed to do just that, what separated him from his target audience. Just a few years previously, he was probably set amongst Well, let’s find out as we bring on to the show to start Join Up Dots. But one and only James Roper. How are you James?
I’m doing great, David. Thanks for having me on. It is great to have you on you’ve got that. We were chatting just before this, we started recording. And you’ve got that kind of very laid back kind of laconic American accent. You sound like you You should just be wearing shorts and a T shirt and strolling around the beach. Where do you come from?
James Roper [3:00]
Well, I am in shorts and a T shirt right now. And I am close to the beach. I’m from South Carolina actually live in Columbia, South Carolina, which is the centre of the state are about two hours away from the mountains and two hours away from the beach.
David Ralph [3:11]
I spent some nice times down in that’s that end of the country really. And man it was hot and sweaty? Did you Do you ever get used to that?
James Roper [3:22]
No, you don’t. You just you get used to kind of thinking of where other people live. And then that gets you through those tougher times because actually was just in Pittsburgh, in the United States the other day. And it was 48 when we were driving through West Virginia and I got out in shorts and a T shirt and flip flops and could see my breath for the first time. And it was in September. And I just recall that it was 95 the Saturday before when I was still in South Carolina. So when you get to experience weather like that, you then also realise that within two more weeks, they’re going to be in freezing weather compared to two more weeks for me which shall still be in the 80s.
David Ralph [3:57]
That is kind of the the madness of the song. All the United States, isn’t it. But you can have such different weather in the United Kingdom, we pretty much I ever had rain all together, snow all together. And it doesn’t really change that much we go cold at the same time. And we get warm at the same time. But in America, I remember going across the bottom of it in November. And it was just like a lovely spring day, every single day just kind of nice t shirt wherever and short. It’s it’s the kind of weather that as an entrepreneur, I find a very lean to when you can actually design your own lifestyle. There’s no point in going to the snow, you might as well go where it’s nice and sunny, do you feel bad
James Roper [4:40]
100% actually talked about that the other day, because I would love to experience and move different places. And I’ve done a lot of travel. And I’ve seen a lot of different places. And I’ve been to Europe, and I’ve been to the UK and I enjoyed it. And I’ve always thought Where else would I want to live. And when I look at a lot of the climates, and if they have that three to four to six month, it’s even sometimes just the cold, miserable wet, that really does make you lethargic. And I know I find myself even down here on kind of the cold days just not wanting to do anything. And so when you have seven to 10 months that are just really beautiful weather, it kind of does, it makes a little more productive, it makes you want to get outside, be active and enjoy life and kind of experience that a little bit more.
David Ralph [5:22]
The trouble with to good weather, though is you never out in it yourself. The amount of people that I speak to who live in California and San Diego, and by Come on Skype. And by that there was white as a ghost. And I say to them, Why are you so why you’re out in the sunshine? Oh, no, we never really see the sunshine, we go from air conditioned car, to the office and back. And I don’t see anything of it at all. I think in many ways, James, I would find it torturous to be in Paradise, and having to work every day, I think I’d prefer to be in some miserable place that I’d be happy to lock myself away and just do the work.
James Roper [5:57]
So that speaks to my heart. Because I mean, the thing that I focused sold the most. And what are the productive person is about is honestly not about productivity. It’s about work life balance. And it’s about why we’re productive. And why we actually want to get things done quicker. It’s because we want to have a better work life and that balance that we need. So when it is sunny outside and I want to go have lunch outside for a couple hours, something I don’t want to feel obligated to stay inside. And if somebody presents me an opportunity to say this weekend, I want to go to the beach. I don’t want to feel obligated, if I’m behind a work to have to stay home, I want to take that opportunity. So yeah, let’s go.
David Ralph [6:31]
And I think that’s really what my whole experience as an entrepreneur is all about. I think it’s it’s so important to have that work life balance. But I would think that certainly in the early days of being an entrepreneur, your work life balance is is totally out of whack. I think most of us take that leap of faith to get away from crazy hours. And we find vain but we’re working more hours. It’s just but we love doing it compared to the hours when we we begrudge doing it.
James Roper [7:00]
Sure, I completely agree. And I think that I’ve heard many people say that work life balance is a joke for entrepreneurs, like there is no such thing as work life balance. And I agree to an extent when they’re talking about the type of business this particular person was discussing. They were talking about how to make this massive, multi billion dollar corporation. And they said, if you’re trying to start that your job is your life at that point in time. But most of us don’t aspire to do that. And I think that that’s what’s lost a lot of times is people think, Well, I do have to work all the time. And I do have to do this. And I have to make this much money in a certain time. And I have to get there now. Now Now, when the whole point of life is to live it you know, it doesn’t matter what point in your life you are at, you can always stop and start living. And I think that with entrepreneurial ism, you can take those two routes, you can either work your tail off in order to have that future freedom, or you can balance it in the present. And it might take you a little longer to achieve maybe that level of freedom that you’re thinking you want. But I can tell you’re going to be a heck of a lot happier during the process. And I think that often if you do push too hard, and you skip out on what life has to offer, within each passing day, when you finally get to the end of your road, whichever, whatever that might be, I think you’ll look back and realise now I wish I’d done more. And also the constantly gonna be thinking like, well, what’s next. And so I think it’s a little bit more about the journey the most people make it out to be, it’s not always about the end result.
David Ralph [8:23]
The word that jumped out to me when you was talking, there was the thought of freedom that you think that you want. Do you think generally that people like the idea of freedom, but actually when they get it, we’re so ingrained with the process process of work and getting things done, but we don’t really know what to do with ourselves. I explained my situation, I’m doing this job. And at the moment, I can pretty much tailor it to my hours. So I can choose what day I do it and I booking the guests, and we do the recordings and blah, blah, blah. And I could effectively just take days off. But I don’t because everybody else is at work. And I kind of think Well, what’s the point of taking days off and just walking around on my own lonely? I might as well just work. So did you think it’s the end product of freedom would only be good if everyone was free. And the entrepreneur actually puts themselves in a position that they don’t know what to do it themselves?
James Roper [9:19]
Hmm, that’s a good question. A good thought I experienced that a lot. My girlfriend right now who I live with actually has a full time job. So she works now. And she used to work retail, which was all crazy. And so I was always trying to work my schedule to make sure I spend the most time with her. But now she has a full time nine to get a nine to five, eight to five, that kind of job. And it really pushes me to make sure I do all of my work during the day because when she gets home, I know that she’s exhausted and wants to have that freedom, you know that she’s should she deserves really from working all those hours. And so it kind of does change your, your mindset a little bit about is are you trying to be free for yourself? Are you trying to be free with others, where that comes from? I know that personally, I hang out with a tonne of entrepreneurs. Now a tonne of people that live the same lifestyle as I do that want that same lifestyle. And I go to the gym with a guy that he actually is a hairdresser. And so he does, he’s a stylist, but because he can control his own schedule, he’s on his own business for nothing. 25 years now, we work out some days a little bit later in the morning. So it’s it’s often you do work with people that have that ability, but you do still have to work around other people’s lives. But you know, it’s just that’s your call, I guess.
David Ralph [10:33]
So. So let’s frame what you actually do for the listeners because there, no doubt intrigued. But you’re somebody who is an entrepreneur, you have designed this life that you can go to the gym in the morning and you haven’t got the restraints, but the nine to five had. So where do you actually earn your money? What What is if if he was in a bar and somebody walked up to you and said, What do you do for a living? And you can’t use the word entrepreneur? What would you say?
James Roper [11:00]
Well, David, that’s the hardest question I think you’re ever asked as an entrepreneur, this, by far my least favourite question I have to have to answer because I find that no matter what you say, you always are interesting enough to create more questions, you know, and so I’m actually still looking for that, because what I what I do is very, I don’t know, it’s, it’s easy to explain, and then it’s hard to explain, I have a couple of two different businesses that we mainly focus on. And I do speaking and then different, like personality gigs with both of them. But the one business on one hand, we actually coach and train authors or potential authors how to write a book from having no idea just knowing I want to write a book and how to publish it within three months to an Amazon bestseller. And that process takes three months. And so that’s a that’s one of my gigs. And that’s something that I am very passionate about. Because I’ve seen what publishing a book can do for you as a person and could also do for you as a job and a profession. It really frees your mind. And it adds a lot of value to your life and other people’s lives too. And so so that’s one of my jobs. And so it’s that’s the easiest one to explain, really, I can just tell people, I’m a publisher, I help publish people know, and that that would be the easiest answer. Now the other hand, we also wrote, we write books, and we have our productivity, work life balance business, where it’s all about building a better life, we actually have a membership called the life architects, and that is a monthly newsletter with different webinars different series like that. But it’s all about not just productivity, but about having a better life in general, how do you do more, so you can do more, you know, like, do more quickly with your business so you can have more fun and do more with their friends. And that includes a lot of information products, and includes a lot of podcast interviews such as this. And that’s those are really how we do it. So we’re digital marketers, we do a lot in the online space. So it’s kind of all over the place. But mainly we’re we’re marketers with a different mindset.
David Ralph [12:55]
So what would your mum say? I assume your mom’s did around. Hopefully she stood up. Okay, so when our friends say, I was James Roper getting on, what does he actually do? What would your mom and she say?
James Roper [13:08]
It’s a great question. I should probably tell you, I’m the greatest son that’s ever lived. And out of her three of her number one favourite number five kids, I’m still the favourite, you know, and I’ll put her on the spot. I’m sure that’s what you’d say. But, uh, she would absolutely just tell you that he’s an entrepreneur. And he has published his own book. And he teaches other people how to do that.
David Ralph [13:28]
And I was hoping for a sexier answer than that really? Not
James Roper [13:32]
as absolutely because mom, mom’s about as confused as everyone else.
David Ralph [13:37]
So if we went back in time, James Roper, which we do and Join Up Dots, what were you always an entrepreneur? Were you the classic? Well, as the Americans do, and we don’t do this over the UK at all, but lemonade stand, I’d never heard this phrase, until I’ve been doing this show that the fault of actually some kids setting up fake lemonade, and people actually buying and drinking, go to the beat what’s in it. But over in America, you kind of do this a lot. Were you that kind of kid that would set up these tools,
James Roper [14:06]
that there’s you I remember you asking that on Dan Martel’s interview. That there Yeah, absolutely. I’m one of the I was not, you know, surprisingly. And I’ll say how I became an entrepreneur is based around that concept, but a little bit differently. When I talk about work life balance. It’s, that’s all that I’ve ever thought about. So my father’s a pharmacist, and my mother’s a school teacher. And so you know, through middle school, I always said, I want to be like my father, he made good money. And he was able to take care of us. I want to be a pharmacist and a job shadowing one day stood on my feet all day and talk to customers behind a desk and I hated it. So this is never going to happen. So I said, Well, I enjoyed medicine, and I’m smart. So what else could I do? I’ll be a doctor. No. And I went to sports medicine route Necedah. Cool. So throughout high school, I studied a lot of sports medicine, and I wanted to be an athletic trainer. And I figured out that they work 14 hour days, and they make like $30,000 a year. And I said, Well, that’s not going to happen. Because I don’t want to make that kind of money. And I definitely want have more free time. And so honestly asked myself, my junior year in high school, I said to myself, what can I do in this world, that would allow me to do all the fun things that I want to do and have the lifestyle I want to live? When I get older? I don’t want to be tied down, like my parents worried, like so many of us around and I said, What can I do? And the only answer I could come up to the actually made sense in my mind for my talent level was to own my own business. And I was very ignorant. At that point, time, I didn’t know what that meant. I just knew that that was who I’d seen had the most money. And that’s who I seen had the most time freedom, and could share the most with their family, which I love family, I really don’t have a big family one day. So I asked myself this questions. And then when I went to University of South Carolina, to actually study business there, that’s really where I took an entrepreneurship course, and kind of got into it, I got an internship when I was a sophomore than they actually trained me how to run my own business. And that was my first taste. You know, I made $10,000 over the summer, and was just ecstatic about it. And I realised at that point in time, that money is abundant. And there’s so many different ways to make money. And I don’t think that people just they just don’t see that enough. So I became an entrepreneur, strictly because I didn’t want to do what other people were doing. Because I knew it wasn’t the best way to live. Can can only
David Ralph [16:17]
come back to the money is abundant, because it is one of these things, but people who haven’t actually started getting going, and our employees in jobs going to the nine to five, they will find that statement hard to believe somebody who is a mover and shaker and is successful, and it’s got loads of different things going on at the same time will agree with you wholeheartedly. So what do you think the the person in the street, the person going to the job? Why is their mindset so opposing to that view?
James Roper [16:54]
Well, first, first thing that pops in my head when I’m trying to answer that question, David is, is just habitual. You know, it’s habitual. throughout our entire lives, we’re taught that this is the way it’s done. And you know, I’ve always been, my mother growing up would always get on to me whenever I would make bad grades. And I was a very smart kid, I finished like top 10 in my class, and I was a natural as we like to call them where it’s just I’m good at it. And I don’t have to put a lot of time and unlike my partner, Chandler who’s actually a burner where he works his butt off and still can be as good as maybe he works like crazy, you know. So growing up, I would come home with like a 93, or something on a test. And my mom would always tell me, he’s like, why did you get 95? Why do you get a 98. And I tell her because I didn’t have to work that hard. And I was able to make it 9093 or 95. And look at all the extra stuff I got to do. Because I didn’t study that much harder to earn those extra three points, like I made an A right, I used to tell me a woman get over it, like, What are you talking about. And I remember used to come to this and said, Mom, here’s the thing, I’m going to graduate high school in the top 10, I’m going to go to college, I’m going to get a college education, I’m going to find a good job, I’m going to create a new business and I’m going to have a successful life, I’m going to get married, have kids because it’s something I want to do. I said, I’m going to travel the world, I’m going to have fun with it. I said and then I will be able to spread that to a legacy beneath me. And that’s going to happen, no matter what happens today on was 93. You know, this test doesn’t mean the rest of my life. But But even me at that point in time in high school, I say that I still went through the process, I’m going to go do this, I’m going to go to college, I’m going to get a job, I’m going to get married, and then I’m going to die, you know. And that’s not necessarily the order that life should be lived in. And I think it’s the only thing we’re ever taught. And even myself, I was still taught that. And I still believe that. And I think that because of that people are trained to be very narrow minded when it comes to opportunities. And it’s a lot easier to say, I can’t do that, than to think I can do that. And how can I do it. You know, it’s just a deeper process. And a lot of people don’t want to spend the mental energy on it. So they’re comfortable and kind of living and living an apathetic style life and living with something that’s very normal, and it appeases everyone around them.
David Ralph [18:59]
So the the comfort word, word, the comfort word is the dream killer, you would rather be uncomfortable and driven to achieve, van, quote, unquote, doing the nine to five coming in going home, sitting there having a dinner, watching a military getting up the next day.
James Roper [19:18]
That 100% I live in an uncertain world not and I’m I thrive with being uncomfortable. And it’s not necessarily what you have to do as an entrepreneur. But I find it’s a heck of a lot more fun when you take that mentality. And when I look at other people around me, and I know you’re never supposed to compare yourself to others, you’re not supposed to say, you know, I’m not as good looking as that person or as I’m not as strong and but you know, it, we’re humans we do. And because of that I used to look at people all the time, and I would look at poor marriages. And I will look at couples that were around me that weren’t happy. And I would look at financial problems with my parents or other people’s parents. And you’re like, why are you in that position? You did it? You just did everything people told you to do. You went to college, you got a job? You seem like you’re doing everything, quote unquote, right? You know, but you’re still in this position. And I’m a big I mean, I used to ask why to every question I still do. And I think that’s one of my childlike curiosity is one of my top values. But when I asked his questions, you know, I can never come up with a good enough answer. Never say like, Well, why did you do this? We did it right. And it kind of irritated me. And then really ticked off. And because of that, I said, I’m not going to do that. You know, and then when you start with that process, you just figure out how not to do it. And I think that that was kind of where all that stemmed from. So I don’t know, I just think that living in uncertainty, and not following the status quo, or kind of just following the the trails that other people have already kind of cut for you is the way that that we grow, you know, and Einstein says insanity, the definition of insanity is doing things over and over the same way and expecting a different result. And that’s the same to be said, for all of our lives. Right now, when you look at other people around. It’s like there’s reasons that economies collapse. There’s reasons that world’s fall and war start. And, you know, and it takes thinkers, and it takes innovators and Dreamers. And it takes those people to say, you know, I don’t know why we’re doing it like this anymore. And they say, let’s why not do it this way. That’s what really that’s what innovation is. And I think it’s so much fun to be that person to even if you can never successfully achieve something that’s will knock the socks off of other people, it might not be a multi billion product, it might not be Facebook or Google. But it still can be something that can change someone’s life. And that’s really important.
David Ralph [21:34]
I agree with you totally, you know, what I’m doing now, I already know is changing people’s lives. Is it something dramatically different from the amount of shows out there? No. But you’re buying into an audience that is already there, isn’t it? And that’s the key thing. If somebody is going to create a business, I would always say, look for a market that’s already out there, and then try to find your own spin and just get a little portion of it. Because you don’t need a lot to be very comfortable. You just need to do something that has your own voice, your own passion in it. Totally. That was a very quick answer back you, you. You batted it back to me. I gotta think of another question. Now James, and I’ve got, I’ve got one waiting for you. You’re reasonably a young man. And I’ve been watching you over the last couple of days going around schools and colleges, and getting up and presenting to people that really to my way of thinking and I’m 44 now. So I’m getting on looks the same kind of ages, you so you’re standing up on stage, and you’re very engaging, and you’re doing these presentations, and the holes are rocking and rolling. And you’re getting the audience up and moving them around and stuff. And you’re looking like you love it. But do you look at them and go, my God, only a few years ago, I was like you and I can already see vast purple sons of you becoming your parents?
James Roper [23:05]
Yeah, sadly, you know, it’s the sad truth of it. And the reason I speak and the reason I love to speak today, if it’s not public speaking, even if it’s just writing a book, or, or coaching a one on one, or helping other entrepreneurs mentor and taking phone calls, whatever it may be. The reason I love to mentor people like that, is because if someone’s been willing to be mentored, they’re the people who are going to change the world. And I learned that I learned, you know, in college, actually, I was in Delta Sigma Pi, which is international business fraternity, that the university south carolina and many other schools. When I was a brother there, we used to interview all the new pledges and the interview process was only to get to know the pledges and the pledges to get to know the brothers so that when they became brothers there were you know, it was full time brother, there was no weird, awkward moment, you already knew each other, you got to hang out, and it was a coed fraternity as well. And I remember hearing in my junior year in college, after doing interview, after interview, after interview, people would ask me, they say, Hey, have you ever thought about being emotional motivational speaker? It’s like, Man, that’s not a chance. I would never do that. And I kept hearing it. They say, Hey, have you ever thought about, you know, speaking professionally? And I said, I don’t? I don’t think that’s, that’s even on the plate, right? And then I don’t know, I’m stubborn. And it took me a couple times of finally hearing that and people saying like, if you ever thought about doing this, and like, you know what? Maybe Maybe I should think about doing this because clearly people think it. So why shouldn’t I do it. And so I actually ended up then starting to look forward to that. And I realised that I love teaching. And the reason I love teaching and motivational speaking and doing info products and stuff was right up my alley is because I firmly believe in Plato’s principle. And I know that a lot of your listeners will understand what that is. And that’s the 8020 principle, a lot of people say or 8020 rule, that just means that 80% of the value is created from 20% of the input, the people that do it all that good stuff, there’s one other meaning to it, but just 20% input 80% output. And it’s also reverse where it’s, you know, you put it in 80% of your input only puts out 20%. And so I knew that to be a teacher, maybe in the school systems, we have to have school teachers, we have to have people that teach Are you from a very young age, and they have to put up with them. And a lot of times they’re babysitters, you know, which really sucks because our school teachers need to be paid way more for what they do. And I said, there’s no way I could live off that income and deal with that many people that weren’t willing to learn. I don’t have that in me. I know, I don’t have it. That’s it. But I want to be a teacher. So how can I do that. And the way you do that is to teach people who want to be taught. And for me that was speaking because a lot of conferences I speak at people pay to be there. People want to hear other people and they want to listen, the people that listen to Join Up Dots are people that want to grow their lives, they want to change, they don’t want to listen to the same old stuff they’ve been listening to and hear the same message. They want to hear innovators and thinkers and new people. And I knew that that was my way to do it was to to spread my hand not to a few people that were only going to then spread to another few people, it was just spread my hand and my knowledge and to help mentor people that were then going to turn around and mentor others. Because it’s like the one times it’s like the one to a few versus the one too many. It’s exponentially grows, when you can do something like what you’re doing with this type of podcasts, as well as speaking and info products and books and stuff, you’re reaching a lot of people that are going to change a lot of lives, versus just teaching 2425 people today.
David Ralph [26:31]
So how do you stop that? So somebody says to you be a motivational speaker? And you go, right, okay, yes. Now, I’m not saying how do you get up on stage and you develop your crowd? And you you design the course or whatever you’re doing to be able to do it? But how do you find the opportunities vain to become? What you want to be?
James Roper [26:53]
Good question, you know, I probably would have had a different answer a few years ago before I started it. And now I think I have a better outlook on failing and seating and all that good stuff. And I’d say that the biggest thing is, it doesn’t matter who you are, or where you are, you have something to say, you know, you just have to figure out what it is that you have to say and why you say it. And if you can express to other people why you say it, they’ll listen, you know, like, Why are you saying that? What is the reason behind that? And I think if you can explain that to people, in any form necessary. That’s how you get started. So if I were to suggest if somebody came to me today, and James, I really want to be a professional speaker, how’d you do it? How do I do it, I would straight up, tell them speak at any opportunity you can, because it’s really important that you break all the limiting beliefs that you have get up on stage, get your name out there a little bit, but really just get the experience behind you. Because your first speech is going to be bad, you know, not like terrible. But you’re going to look back at three speeches later and even be like, holy crap, why did I say that? I cannot believe that I did that. And so the more you can do that, and get that out of the way, before you actually try to make a business of it, the better you’ll be. And it’s very simple. Once you if you understand marketing at all, it’s it’s it gets simple, more simple as it goes along. So just get a little video made, have some audio done, create a couple like brochures or something, you can throw up a very quick website, and your website could have one video on it that had one link that said, book me for speaking engagement. Now, if that’s where you want to get started, that’d be all you needed, because speakers can get paid a lot of money once you just get a little experience. And that’s what we’re talking about money as abundant earlier, I remember when I first left my job, I was going to be making about 60 to 80,000 the next year at my job. And I could have done that, you know, that could have worked one more year loved what I did in coaching entrepreneurs and but I learned about two thirds of my job and we had to produce and work in the summer as the hot it was hot heat. And we’re training people how to run an outdoor business. You know, I got, I didn’t like it that much. So I left that job left really good money with like $15,000 in the bank immediately invested five into a coaching programme and had 10,000 left, then people so why the heck would you do that you have no money have no guarantee stuff I said, because I’m going to try to do speaking right now. And I’m a good salesman, I used to sell at 68%. And I was selling $4,000 Jobs, my average is like $3,000 job that I’d sell. Now I’m lazy, that will get me wrong. I’m a terrible prospector. But if you get me in the door, I’m gonna sell. And so I knew that if that were the case, I could just if I could talk to 20 people. And if I could sell, if I could talk to 20 people per month who had any inkling of the need for a speaker to hear a message that I could portray to them. And I could convince two of those people, heck one of those people, I can make a 1500 2000 1500 3000, whatever it might be, for like an hour speech that I have already prepared. You know, and if you if you look at it that way, so you need $2,000 to live, if you’re my age or something like that, and maybe you’ll have a tonne of responsibility $2,000 to live, you can book one gig each month and you could survive.
David Ralph [29:56]
So that is liberating, isn’t it having that ability to have a certain amount of money almost waiting on tap for you, which frees you up then to take other opportunities and be more creative in your life knowing that, quote, unquote, your bills and your expenses are easily paid for not easily, but you can do something to find that money to actually deal with those kind of things.
James Roper [30:21]
Yeah, and I think that’s there’s a big movement kind of started a few years back. And I know that the people, the person that people always reference is definitely Tim Ferriss in the four hour workweek. And that was something that really shone, shine a light on it for me. But it’s all about how how do you cover your lifestyle, and then whatever you make past that is the basically like free money, I must, you know, you think we do have necessities as a, as a human kind that I actually have a mortgage, I bought a house 21. So I’ve had a mortgage for a while and I had to pay that and not a car and you know, you have cell phones, you have all these other business, these expenses. But outside of that the money that we have goes to what you know, goes to savings, it goes to our future, it goes to whatever. And there’s some people that spend a lot of it now there’s some people that only save for later and they manage their budgets really well. And when you look at it from a from a standpoint of like, what’s the worst case scenario, that’s kind of what I asked myself, when I first quit that job was what is the worst case scenario, and I realised that the worst case scenario for me wasn’t that I was going to go broke and end up a bomb on the street and not have any money or food, you know, I have family and friends that would easily take care of me. But even if I didn’t have those, that still wasn’t my worst case scenario, my worst case scenario was that I had to get a job, you know, and I’d be like everybody else. That’s what I didn’t want. And so, knowing that though, I was like, all I need to have is two grand, I can do that. I can make two grand, like I’m sure of it. You know? And when you have that mentality where it’s like, how do I make two grand? That’s not nearly as hard is how do I start a business that’s going to make my livelihood? You know, how do I make a business? It’s going to save me from the tyranny of a work, daily job or something like that.
David Ralph [32:02]
Yeah, no, I agree with that, totally. When I quit my job, I, I had enough money to pay the bills. And that’s it. And I pretty much had an indefinitely long runway to get this off the ground. And I have been, I’ve had the ability to be fussy and be choosy. And when opportunities have come away, if it doesn’t resonate with me, I’ve knocked them back. Because that Tim Ferriss book really did shift my mind and is one of the two but I quote, more often than not, it’s either that will Think and Grow Rich is the two books when I read them to myself, wow, there is a world out there. But I wasn’t aware. And the four hour workweek just made me realise that you can transition to a better way. And it doesn’t have to be instantaneous. It doesn’t have to be scary. But it has to be something that you work at. And if you work at it, so that you get some passive income coming in, it does make it so much easier, even to the point that you you can quote unquote, say, Oh, my mobile phone is free, my TV is free. And once you start chipping away at those expenses. And I think that’s really what we were saying about earlier. You know, if you think about I need 20,000 pounds a month, you kind of go out how the hell am I going to do that. But if you go, why I need to get $15 a month to pay for my mobile phone bill, most of us could go Oh, yeah, I know how to do that bang, you suddenly got a free phone, and you just move methodically through your expenses, until you get to the point of being able to make a decision of what you want to do in your life.
James Roper [33:41]
Yeah, absolutely. And I think that that’s one of those crazy things. And you’ll hear so many commonalities between entrepreneurs. And I think there’s a different term now basically, like lifestyle entrepreneurs, that how they live and they outsource there’s a common terminology or terminology and one of them is, you know, outsourcing and finding others people paying other people to do things that you don’t want to do, or you’re not great at, you know, I one of the best things I’ve ever, you know, heard was that whenever you’re building a team, you know, this is from a actually from Success Magazine was an interview they did in there, and said, whenever you’re building a team, you always want to find people that play at the things that you work at. So you can play it the things like so you can play it, the things that you play at. And that whole concept is just so foreign to the majority of people where, you know, there’s very few of us out there that really enjoy doing lawn care. You know, it’s it’s tough, especially down here in the south, I mean, it’s hours outside and the heat, and you’re nasty. And you know, you might not enjoy that. It’s just something that you’ve been trained you have to do as a homeowner, but you could pay someone $40 $40 to go do that for you. And for a lot of people, if you work a job, that could be one hour, that could be two hours, that could be three hours. And still, they’re going to be able to do that better, more efficiently and quicker. And you’re gonna either be able to enjoy your life. Or if you really work at it, you can just make that money back. And I remember that mentality, talking about being an entrepreneur earlier. And like when I really realised that I made that decision back in college, and it was the first time I’d really ever thought about myself as time trade for money. Versus You know, my freedom in my lifestyle and stuff. And I reference a game. I don’t know, it’s an EA Sports game called The Sims. Have you ever heard of it? Yes, I have. Yeah. So the Sims is all of you build an avatar, you build your Sim, and then you create a lifestyle. I played that when I was younger. And I remember that, when you first start out in that game, you have like the crappiest bed possible. You know, you’re sleeping on a cot sleeping on the floor, like a roll out mattress, something like that. And the thing about it is the worst the bed, the longer it took you to get fully rested and a kind of energy bar. And then the, the shorter your energy span would last, you know, she had to sleep more often. And you slept for longer periods of time. And then as you progress in the game, the better bed you got, the quicker you became fully rested. And the happier you were when you woke up like your comfort level was really high as well. And I remember being in college, and thinking about that. And I was after I ran my first business, you know, and I made about 10 grand, and I was kind of in that college stage was like, Hey, you know the heck to do it’s that much money. You know, like, What do I do? How do I make something out of this. And I was during the school year, I didn’t have anything to pay, you know, I was living off of what I made over the summer, except for I did it in a mural sports. But that only paid that was a passion project more so and it paid like 815 hours something as a college student. But it was it was fun for me. I enjoyed being around sports and I enjoyed refereeing and officiating games. And I remember I wanted a mattress topper for the mattress in my college apartment. And so I looked up a couple online and I had a membership club around my area that had one $400. And it was exactly what I needed what I wanted. And I looked at it, I said I can’t afford that I don’t have 100 bucks to spend frivolously on it. Then I said, Wait, let’s think about this. If I get that magic, and if I bought the topper, it’s $100 on the least worth $10 an hour, like me at least worth it, I can find a way to work for $10 an hour as a college student. That’s a very low, low standard. But I said $10 an hour, I said, if I’m working $10 an hour, that means I have to work 10 hours to pay for that mattress topper. And I said if I get that mattress topper, I’m easily going to be able to wake up earlier. And as long as I can be a little more productive in the mornings, or just spend that time wisely, I will quickly pay off for that mattress topper. You know and I remember thinking that to myself and thinking it was like the this breakout thought process and it kind of was you know, and nobody else had taught me that that was just something that I kind of experienced. And I guess the game taught me a little bit but I remember that that being a defining moment in my life where I started seeing the time trade of your your value, you know to the world and then what you’re actually doing with it and that when you start looking at it that way you start doing you start outsourcing in getting rid of tasks that don’t add a lot of value, but cost you a lot of time or money. You know things like lawn care, I don’t want to spend five hours on a Saturday cleaning my lawn or cutting my grass trim my hedges and that kind of stuff. I would rather watch football or I guess yeah, for football for us, you know American football and on Saturdays. I’d rather do that all day. But I can’t do that if I’ve got to cut the grass you know so when you start looking at it that way your life will completely change in just this drastic way and it has for me since I guess I was 20 years old when I had that thought
David Ralph [38:32]
so so you want to sit down on a Saturday watching 10 minutes of football and nine hours of adverts? Is that what you want to watch?
James Roper [38:39]
No. Instead of 90 minutes of straight Phil I played you know football for my whole life Don’t get me wrong that’s what actually I vitiated when I was in college but American football on Saturdays I’m from university South Carolina proud to be a game cock. And when you football on Saturdays is it’s like God’s country. You know it is the thing you do. And it’s pretty much gone this all the weekends nowadays. I watch NFL on Sundays, and I watch college football on Saturday. So I want to do that. And but damn it, I’m going to do it.
David Ralph [39:07]
Absolutely. I salute you for your passion, sir. I don’t know how you do it. But I salute you. Anyway, let me tell you the first about one of our motivational speeches. And this is something that really emphasises once again, what you were saying then about finding something and really following through on it because you love it. This is Jim Carrey,
Jim Carrey [39:25]
my father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [39:52]
Now, I’m going to put a different spin on that. Because generally, I would always say to somebody along the lines of Do you think that’s the message that we should share with the world, but with yourself? It’s not so much that that you’re taking a risk on the things you love. You’re really finding a way of building a life that you love on you. You’re looking at the things that are inconveniences and trying to get rid of them. You’re looking at things that will make you money easily and bring more of them to you. Do you consider that a risk? Or is it just that you’re playing in an area like Jim Carrey say that you you love?
James Roper [40:28]
Well, one First off, Jim Carrey is one of my top three favourite comedians of all time, him the late Robin Williams and Aziz Ansari, who’s actually from South Carolina are my three favourite comedians of Jim Carrey speaks to my heart, you know, more than a lot of people do, and actually have heard that whole speech. And when it comes to talking about that risk, I think he’s totally right with that, where, you know, the risk for me, is not doing that, you know, and when you look at that, if you want to go on a little little darker, maybe path for a second here, we all have short lifespans, you know, some of us shorter than others, some of us are unfortunate enough to be in an accident and lose our lives early on. And and some of us live long, long lives. But no matter how short or how long your life is, the quality can be is only determined by you. And so if you’re only alive until a younger age, you can still live justice full life as someone who is 90 years old and had to work in a steel mill their whole lives paying off debt that they had accrued. So it just depends on the risk level of what you’re willing to take. And I think that, you know, I’m not, I’m a risk taker more, so I’m not really risk averse at all, but I do mitigate them, you know, you gotta look at things in your life. And, and I remember that’s the question I asked myself when I finally decided to be an entrepreneur just full time right out of college. And I said, like, what is the worst case scenario, and you got to be very real, your worst case scenario is not the same for every other person. Some people are not as skilled as others, some people don’t have the same confidence level. And you do have to have your dif different risk level there. But when you look at that worst case scenario, this not that bad, so it mitigates the risk on the front end, you know, but if you’re thinking about working a job that you do not like for even a year, or if you want to go down I I’ve had friends recently that just left their jobs because they were miserable. When I I’m a huge proponent, I’m like, why are you ruining your life. And I was like, You are not the friend that I want to be friends with. Right now I’m getting a sub subpar version of you, because of your crappy job. You need to find a way to get out of that even if you take a pay cut, even if you have to receive to start over your happiness right now is way more important than what you’re doing in this job. And because you’re apathetic about leaving, or you’re scared to leave. And I’ve talked to a lot of friends lately about that kind of stuff. Because you know, it’s me, I’ll happy all the time. And I don’t want to be around people that are happy. So if your job is the number one thing in your life, change it, change it and stop making it the number one priority. Move do
David Ralph [42:59]
I am, we’re back. And I know so many of our listeners agree with that, because they email me and that’s the path that they’re on. But your friends who are stuck, they’re scared. They’re unwilling to actually take a change. And we’re not saying you know, being an entrepreneur, as you were saying, just get a different job. And if you aren’t in a job that you don’t like, I always think there’s two ways of doing it. You can either go internally and say, I don’t like this job. I want to work for this company. But I’d like to do something else to ignite my mojo and get me going again, because I’ve got bored with doing what I want, or you leave. But so many people will see that they’ve only got that one’s chance. Oh, it’s a job. I’m so lucky to have that job. And I think that’s rubbish now. But you can go and do, I would leave and out do anything I would, I would mow lawns, if I quit my job. And I had to find money so that I could ultimately do what I wanted. I would mow lawns in California, Caleb, where Where do you live? I can’t even man where you live now.
James Roper [43:59]
David Ralph [44:00]
Yeah, Carolina, couldn’t say me Take one funny bear. But I would sweat for 40 days on this trot to make sure that I could do what I want. But your friends are probably looking at you as almost frivolous and just, you know, quote, unquote, a loose cannon but you seem to have your cake and eat it because it’s so alien to the way that they’ve been ingrained, isn’t it?
James Roper [44:26]
Sure. 100%. And I bring back my girlfriend, I mean, I love her to death. But she has a very opposite end of the spectrum from where I am. She’s an entrepreneur, she just doesn’t know it yet. You know, like she she’s she speaks and says everything an entrepreneur does. But she is a very, she’s very risk averse person. And she’s more of a word than I am. Now. She’s also she’s more of a realist. And I’m an optimistic realist, you know, I tend to lean way more to the optimistic side, but then I’ll back off a little bit, you know, not crazy, I just, I will mitigate the risk a little bit. But I tried to talk to her and a few other friends that are very similar to that. It’s, it’s the fear is the fear of the unknown is what it was what it boils down to, you know, because it’s not, they’re not thinking that they can’t do it all the time, you know, what they’re doing is they’re hearing all these outside influences of people that have failed, and they’re seeing statistics, it’s like one in 10 businesses or one in 100 businesses succeed, or whatever they say nowadays, which is all crap, because people can start a business and claim it, you know, it’s like, what is that statistic based off of? A lot of people shouldn’t start businesses. Now a lot of people aren’t meant to, you know, just like certain people aren’t meant to become professional speakers. That’s a lot of the reasons businesses fail. But if you have a passion to start a business, and you go about it the right manner, and that your business will succeed, you just have to do the right steps. And so I think when you’re talking to people that are a little more risk averse, and they’re they’re very fearful of what’s out there, and they look at you, and they’re like, Well, yeah, but you’re you can do that, but I can’t do that. You know, I hear that all the time. whenever they’re saying that, you just, it’s a limiting belief, it’s something in their life that’s changed that mentality, it could be bestowed upon them by their parents, it could have been their schooling, they could be anything, but often you just need to talk to them about it, you need to get through that and say, like, really, what’s the fear is a fear of security, like you feel like you won’t have enough money? Do you feel like you’ll be looked as a failure? If you don’t have a job? Do you feel like your parents say you need to be a doctor, you need to be this, then you’re looking for approval, there’s often a reason that it’s there’s generally a singular reason. That’s the 80% of why people are fearful of creating that and then don’t want to take that risk. You know, it’s you just kind of got to talk to those people and figure that out, and then try to reverse that,
David Ralph [46:43]
well, well, you’re limiting beliefs, because we all have them done. We we all have self limiting beliefs. So what would you say? Is your mindset but you know, deep down, you’ve got to shift.
James Roper [46:54]
Oh, man, that is a brilliant question, David, kudos on that one. I one of my values, openness and honesty. So I’ll be very, very honest here. And this is kind of crazy, to say, I’ve been working on my limiting beliefs for a long time. You know, when I was when I was younger, I was very, I’ve always been a very smart person. And because of that, I’ve been very boastful. And I’ve been arrogant, I was very arrogant, growing up, I’ve learned to tweak that into cockiness. But I was very arrogant growing up, and I’m one of the most confident people you’ll ever meet. But my limiting beliefs that I’ve I’m still working on. So the only one that I know, actually, that that still limits me in any capacity my life, because I’ve shattered and reversed a lot of them. But the one that still holds you back a little bit. It’s kind of crazy. And it’s actually that I not memorable. You know, my greatest fear. And my greatest limiting belief is that I do not put an impression on people to wear when they see me in the street Three years later, that they will know who I am and want to come talk to me, which is crazy enough. It’s been it’s been reversed so many times and people and people have disproven it so many different times, and I know where it comes from, I have a really good memory, kind of a freakish memory. And I remember if I don’t remember your name, I will remember your dog’s name, your mom’s name, where you’re from just this crazy, weird stuff, you know, where we were what you aware, and I kind of have that type of memory. And I think the fear comes out of that, because I remember everything about them. And I can remember what we talked about. And often I have fear that maybe their memories, not the same. You know, so my, my greatest limiting belief by far is that I will not be remembered.
David Ralph [48:33]
I used to have that. But mine was a wider sense. Mine was about I wouldn’t leave my mark on this planet, I would come and go and be it. Which is one of the reasons why I went into this because I fought unless the internet dies. And that’s the beauty of the internet, isn’t it and and one of the bad things, you know, you can put things out there. And when we are long gone by you will still be there somewhere that you can find dodgy haircuts and bad pitches, and God knows what. But that was my thing, fear my fear that I was not going to leave my mark on things. And now I’m doing this. I have self limiting thoughts all the time. And quiet. I’m aware of them as well, which is the silly thing. I have these thoughts come up. And then I actually analyse them. And I think well, why have I got photos? And I can’t work out the answer. A lot of people say to me, you know, you really got to work out. The reason behind but limiting falls, that’s the thing. I don’t think I’m back clever to actually analyse myself. I had these folks come up all the time, but the show is not going to go well or I’m not providing enough value, or the guests are going to dry up, blah, blah, blah, you know, and I probably am working too hard on the show. Now to keep it going. Because it’s already established, I should relax a bit. But I don’t I keep on going at it day after day after day after day, just thinking but I’ve got to just keep getting ahead, keep getting ahead, keep getting ahead. So I think self limiting thoughts as I’m talking, this is bad. I shouldn’t be enjoying myself, I should be actually working to create something which is self standing, then I can free myself. But actually James, I reckon I could do it already. And I could free myself to have a lot more time than I do. Because the show is already you know, out there is doing what you should be doing.
James Roper [50:24]
Does that make sense? And so totally. And David, I think that’s what you’re saying. And when I hear that, I think a lot about what about habits and about systems. And I’m in our businesses, I actually generally perform the role of the CEO. So I am, I’m a planner, you know, but I’m an action taker and I plan things more, I want to see the process. I want to know how it works and why it does what it does. And I treat that I treat my body that way too. Like I go to the chiropractor and I’m like, why is my shoulder consistently coming out? Like I have a problem with my right shoulder? I used to play volleyball. And I think a lot of it comes from from tendinitis that I had then but like I’ll work out and I’m like, why is this? Why does this happen? I go to the part of my How can I fix this? What do I need to do to fix this what stretches what exercise, and I’m constantly treating it as the system systematised thing. And I think that what you said really resonated with me because even our limiting beliefs are all habits. They’re all systems. You know, when something happens, we react a certain way, when someone, one of my reactions that I actually have David, that’s, that’s a habit, with something like a limiting belief is when people give me compliments. Now, I genuinely do not know how to take compliments I’ve been working on for a few years now. But what it was because I was so arrogant as a child, you know, when growing up, I was so arrogant that people wouldn’t compliment me, you know, I never received compliments growing up, because they didn’t want to, you know, inflate my head, they would always say like, I don’t want to make her head any bigger. Because of that, once I got past that, and I became more humble, and I grew, I mature, you know, when you grow up. Now, when people compliment me, I blush, I turn like beet red. And I’m like, a thank you like, I don’t, I don’t know how to take them. That’s a habit, you know, the more you have a compliment, and you respond the correct way with Thank you so much, I really appreciate it, that becomes your new habit. And that’s the same thing with any limiting belief at all. It’s all about how you respond to and even if you have to take it from your subconscious of being habit and putting your conscious mind of saying, Thank you, I really appreciate that instead of blushing. Eventually, that subconscious or that conscious mind will overtake and it’ll turn into subconscious. So with you, it seems a lot like that system and with this business, take your time, man, like you’ve done so much work you’ve learned, you’ve, you’ve been through it to where I’m sure that you screwed up a lot creating this, and you’ve made mistakes where you’re looking back and say, Man, I wish I knew that that was dumb. And now once you’ve known that you just got to create systems in your life to that allows you to free up your life, you know,
David Ralph [52:47]
when it’s funny, actually, because I don’t I don’t think that people asked me this, you know, what’s been your biggest failure doing this? And I can’t think of one. And I. And I always say to them, I’m sure that I made him. But I only made a mistake, because my knowledge was at that level at that time. You know, I couldn’t have done any better, because I didn’t know any better. And then you proceed through him and you find better systems and you find different ways of doing it. But actually, but some mistakes. No, I can’t see love that seems like he’s just totally where I was at the time.
James Roper [53:22]
That’s so good. Man. I love that. I love that man. Because it’s talking about this. That’s where it was at the time. And therefore it was it was off of my knowledge, I made the best decision possible at the time. And you are so right, what a great way to look at it. And I would say that, that’s that’s really cool, man. Good job on that.
David Ralph [53:39]
Thank you very much. That’s that’s that’s how I feel. I’m going to tell you something else. That’s cool. Well, I’m not going to tell you, Mr. Steve Jobs is because this is a speech that he made and is the theme of the whole show. And it really does sort of emphasise once again, yeah, you’ve been brilliant on the show, because the speeches have got a different vibe to them the normally. And with Steve speech about sort of the connecting of the dots, a lot of the kind of habits that we’ve been talking about the self limiting beliefs are actually part of our journey as well, we build them up somehow through our past until day after day after day after day, they beat us as well. So I’m going to play his words. And I think we’re going to look at this in a slightly different way. This is Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [54:22]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leaves you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [54:57]
So do you think putting it a different spin that if we actually looked back and connected our dots, but we connected our habits, we could actually deconstruct our self limiting beliefs, we could actually follow through what we do on a daily basis that holds us back and almost work out what caused it in the first place.
James Roper [55:18]
Oh, yeah, you’re on fire this interview? It’s great question. I totally, totally think so. I think that the majority of our lives, the majority of our lives are lived in our subconscious. You know, we couldn’t we couldn’t operate as human beings without our habits. You know, we we brush our teeth, their teeth the same way we drive constantly while having conversations. And the reason is, is because of our driving as a habit, this is always bringing that up where it’s like how many how many of us have been driving down the road, and realise that we just lost like the past 30 minutes. You know, you don’t remember anything you don’t remember seeing any billboards you barely remember signs, you don’t remember what you’ve passed, because you’re in your own little space. The reason is because your habits took over. And they said that when there’s a car with brake lights in front of you, I should slow down when there’s a white line or yellow line on either side, I should stay between those. And I checked for speed limit signs, and I slow down. Like that’s a habit and that creates the majority of our lives. And I think that when you start dissecting and looking back and all the negative habits and all of your positive habits, you can figure out how well you respond to creating new ones like new positive habits, and all of these really negative ones, and what level of negativity they’re creating on your life. And like in that case, which order do they need to be taken care of actually had a conversation, David with a really great youth, one of my best friends that I’ve known since I guess I was about 10 years old, 12 years old, and he actually is addicted to drugs. He’s an addict, as they say. And he his drug of choice is marijuana. But really, because he’s an addict, he did marijuana and he would drink and he would drink too much, you know, drinking excess. And he’s been sober for over three years. Now. He’s my age. And we had a conversation the other day, and we talked about that. And he said, How much do you think your conscious mind focuses on your addiction now that you’ve been three years sober? He said maybe like 20% of my mind is constantly still focused on not like not slipping back into addiction. I said, Okay, well, subsequently, how much did you have to think about it when you first started, like that process of becoming sober that actually started these three years? Because, you know, he’s relapsed a few times when he was younger. I said, How did you do that. And he said, I used to put all of my effort into it, it was just enough for me to be able to pay my bills. And to not use that was all I had in me, it was because it took up like 80% plus of his conscious mind. But now his life’s changed. And he’s able to do more things. He’s rebuilt his entire life with learning how to drive a car kit, learning how to be a human, you know, and interact with people. And he’s learned those things to where now that addiction that controls his entire life, is now a subconscious habit that he’s created to where he barely has to put in the effort toward it. And I think that connecting those dots back where he was able to kind of look at his life. And now he realises how much free conscious mind he has to innovate, create, and to continue to grow as a person. And so that’s a really, really interesting conversation actually had the other day with a very dear friend of mine, that showed a lot of light on our ability to create new and change our habits. So that’s why people fail. You know, that’s why it’s why we fail, why businesses fail. That’s why we fail as humans is because we try to do these new year’s resolutions and stuff was like, I’m going to work out four times a week now. Now, it’s, it’s really freaking hard to work out four times a week when you’ve never been to a gym, huh? Yeah, you know, you can’t just start working out four times a week, some people like Oh, you got to go quit cold turkey, you got to just start like, or you could just start at slower than that and create something, you’re actually not going to fail out like a mini habit. Or it’s like do one push up a day, for a month, and get used to the mindset of doing a push up. And now all of a sudden, that becomes conscious or subconscious to you. And now you push it up to 10 push ups and all of a sudden that becomes conscious to you and subconscious and then go get a gym membership and say I’m going to go two days a week, for 30 minutes, you know, then create those habits. And then eventually, after a year, you’re going to go to the gym four times a week, it won’t feel painful, it won’t feel like a process. But if you just try to start four days a week, you’re gonna fail, you know, it’s just not you don’t have enough conscious mind to make that habit. And that big change in your life. And that’s the same thing with entrepreneurial ism, and quitting your job and all that kind of stuff. You can’t, when you do it in such a drastic way that you that you kind of put your hand in the fire, I’m actually I used to be that person. I was like, you just gotta go for it. And then my partner, Chandler, you had him on Chandler bolt, he’s that way he quit. He dropped out of school, we started our own businesses and stuff. And he’s, he preaches one way and actually preach a different way where he preaches, quit and go for it. And I did that, you know, and it was really hard. For me, it was just hard I I’m not that kind of person. And what I teach now is to slowly create it to where it’s a smooth transition, almost like passing trains where you can just, they slow down. So you can just quickly jump on the other one as it’s going in a different direction. So if you’re going full speed on both trains, and you try to completely jump from one to the other, you’re not going to make it. But if you just kind of have this passing trains that are coming head on, and as they’re passing, they slow down to let you step across the platform on to the next one, it’ll slowly pick up speed and you’ll be able to take off in the other direction. on this show. We called it the slide of faith, not the leap of faith is one that you’ve been working at to transition. And then at the very last minute, you just lift your leg up and you’ve moved across, and it’s just a natural thing. You know, it doesn’t seem as scary. I understand what Chandler says. And I understand that if you burn all your bridges, and you really have to go out your hustle muscle is gonna start flexing, like you’ve never know, oh, yeah, but I haven’t got that in me. Although I’m hustling like a lunatic on a daily basis. I like the comfort, but I can pay my bills. I like the fact that there was a transition I planned towards. But I do see that, throw yourself off a cliff, build a parachute on the way down, and hopefully you don’t die. But that’s just not me. And I don’t think that’s a lot of people, which is why so many people are stuck. Because they look at the as you were saying the worst case scenario before they even leap. You know, if you just push them off the cliff, then they would wave their arms around, they do anything they possibly can not to drop to the death. But it’s the jump. That’s the scary bit. And David on that real quick, let me throw in something here that Chandler and I teach in our book to productive person. And we teach them a couple courses we have that there’s two basic types of people. And then they try to be the productive person, which is what that books about. There’s one that’s called the naturalist one that’s called the burner, the burner is Chandler, he’s my partner and he is that workhorse, man, he goes to work, it just works, works, works, works works. But he burns himself out and often forgets to have time during his day. And what he’s learned is he likes to burn, burn, burn, because that’s who he is, which then frees up large chunks of time for himself. I’m a little bit different. I’m a natural, where I’m just good at it. But I’m lazy, you know, so I can’t do the whole I’m going to work 12 hours straight and then work another day at 12 hours. And then I’ll have the whole weekend off. I would rather you know break that up a little bit. And I’ll take a couple breaks here, I’ll go do things I’ll live life. You know, as it comes to me, I would say that very easily. And I don’t think I’ve ever said this to anybody before, David that if your face on the more of the natural side, which you’re just kind of things come easy to you. You just get on, you know, you’re always the person in meetings, you’re like, yeah, yeah, keep yelling, whatever, I know how to do this, but you’re really lazy, then you should probably go the slide route. And if you’re more of a burner where you can just work your tail off, you know, I have a lot of people in my life that are like my life that are like that, if you can just work your tail off. You know, jumping without a parachute is probably a good idea. Because you know, you will not fail and you have that in you. Some of us don’t have a dentist, but you have it in you as a burner, to go with very little money, start your own business and just over the next couple months, just work your tail off to make it happen. I think that that’s probably the in my mindset. That’s the easiest way to look at it. So I think there are two perspectives. Yeah, for me, it sounds like for you as well, David, I wasn’t the you know, jump out of a Brit jump off the aeroplane kind of thing. I was more of the Let me take a parachute with me.
David Ralph [1:03:17]
Yeah, absolutely. I’ll throw a couple of children outside got something soft to land on.
James Roper [1:03:22]
Yeah. And see how they fall, you can predict their trajectory. And that’s good.
David Ralph [1:03:26]
Absolutely. And that’s a parent of five talking them. I know what I would do.
James Roper [1:03:30]
Be scared of three, it’ll probably take you to to make sure that it landed right? Yeah, absolutely.
David Ralph [1:03:36]
Practice makes perfect. Now, this is the end of the show, I really don’t want to say goodbye to you, James. Because you you provided so much value and nuggets of gold all the way through. Not least and this is the phrase just before I put you on the Sermon on the mic and send you back in time. But I really think is the nugget of the whole show. And I wrote this down, no matter how long your life is, the quality is down to you. And that is absolutely true, isn’t it for all the listeners out there. But all the people who aren’t listeners yet, but are going to come to the shows in the future. That is the message that we should be getting out to them. It’s you that needs to take the responsibility, and no one’s going to do it for you. And if you don’t get off your backside, vain, well, shut up and put up basically wants you back and James is a bit harsh.
James Roper [1:04:26]
No, I love it. I think it’s totally right. You know, we always they always say the only person that can change your attitude is you?
David Ralph [1:04:33]
Absolutely right, let’s send you back. Let’s make you like Marty McFly, put you in the DeLorean and send you back in time because this is a part of the show, when we send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could go back in time and speak to the young James, what age would you choose? And what would you say? Well, we’re going to find out because you about this is the Sermon on the mic.
We go with the best bit of the show.
James Roper [1:05:20]
Who are you? Oh, hey, James, don’t freak out. Dude. I’m you from the future. Alright, so bear with me. Why do we talk about the future? Just Just listen, yeah, arrogant son of a gun. Just let me hear me out. And listen, I know you’re only in middle school right now. And I know that you are kind of just learning your way and you’ve got all these pretty girls around you. And you’re learning to be in this bigger city and you think you’re the big dog. Now you know, you’re about to move up to high school and you’re really confident about yourself. So you keep your confidence. Now that’s, that’s what’s going to change the rest of your life for the better. But I’ll tell you this, learn that you can be confident. But you don’t have to try to prove everyone wrong. You know, it’s okay for you to be right. And you not tell them if it wrong, man. So just be confident. But don’t shove it down people’s throats because you come off a little arrogant. You know, khaki is cool, I’m cool with khaki, just stop being arrogant. And when it comes to that, man, take everything in your life from here on out any opportunity that comes, don’t pass it up, do everything in your power to live your life, how you want to live it. But don’t miss opportunities, if somebody invites you to a party, and you have to choose between going to this party or sitting on your button watching TV and like eating pizza or something with one friend, go enjoy the party, if somebody invites you to go on a trip, and you say I don’t know if I can afford it, find a way to afford that trip. Because all of those experiences, all the ones that you take and you go for are the things that are going to shape your entire life and and shape your mindset in a way that’s going to help you change the rest of the world. As you keep going. If you do not do this, James, what’s going to happen is people are going to look at you in a in a poor light. And because they look at you in a light of arrogance, they look at you as someone that they don’t want to be you they’re not going to ever be able to change. So what you have to do is come off as a confident person that’s willing to help others that doesn’t think he’s better than them, but is willing to help them grow to be better people. And by doing that people are going to want to be around you, people are going to remember you and people are going to help you change the world.
David Ralph [1:07:34]
James, how can our audience connect with you.
James Roper [1:07:37]
So they can find me on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, all that good stuff. And also, if you go to the productive person.com, you’ll be able to sign up and you can get our free action guide to our book. And we actually give the audiobook way right now on the websites. If you want to go to that you can have the audio book, as well. And we have a couple of other things that we send out on our email list. We always try to stay very connected with people that wanted to connect with us. I’m very open to connect with people Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, follow me interact with me, I’ll try to do the same.
David Ralph [1:08:06]
We will have over links on the show notes. James, thank you so much for spending time with us today, joining up those dots. And please come back again when you have more dots to join up. Because I do believe that by joining up those dots and connecting our past is the best way to build a futures James Roper. Thank you so much.
James Roper [1:08:23]
Thanks, David. You’re awesome.
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you were wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up Dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.