Welcome to the Join Up Dots business coaching podcast interview with Ian Maxi Jackson
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Introducing Ian Maxi Jackson
Ian Maxi Jackson is today’s guest joining us on the Join Up Dots free podcast interview.
He is a man whose middle name is maxi (i’ll be honest I’m not sure if this was from birth or he added it later), but it certainly fits extremely well in regards to his approach to life.
He believes that we all have it in us to live our lives to the “Max” and its not our situations, income, lifestyles, or anything else that holds us back other than quite simply ourselves.
He qualified as a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, and worked for many years providing solutions-orientated guidance for weight-loss, smoking, and the elimination of phobias.
How The Dots Joined Up For Ian
Ian Jackson’s goal is to encourage clients to adapt and improve all aspects of their lives by understanding the vital role the mind plays in all our lives.
And it’s not just individuals where his talents as a “Mind Coach” come to the fore, as he works with companies, organisations and individuals from his varied experience as a Business Owner, Sports Coach, Trainer, Sales Manager and Therapist he knows what they are going through.
He is the author of ‘Escape the Mind Trap – How to Conquer Your Inner Demons‘ and can dig down past the stumbling blocks and self-limiting beliefs that hold us all back, and find the fears and anxieties that actually create the things that we think are holding us back.
Get rid of them and see your life change.
So how has Ian managed to overcome the fears and concerns that stop the rest of in our tracks?
And does he see the same issues time and time again, and can help us on Join Up Dots make a step forward in our own pursuit of success?
Well let’s bring onto the show to start joining up dots, as we discuss the words of Steve Jobs in todays Free podcast, with the one and only Mr Ian Maxi Jackson!
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Ian Maxi Jackson such as:
How fear is an emotional reaction to a perceived threat, and can root so many of us to the spot before we even get going.
Why he believes its so important to spend time doing the things that you love.
Why he found himself sitting in a field in France, only drinking water for four days, and what occurred whilst doing it.
The wise words of William James, who said “We are the mess of our habits”
In life you are only the cause or effect, so if you want to start getting the life you want focus in on becoming the cause.
Books By Ian Maxi Jackson
How To Connect With Ian Maxi Jackson
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Audio Transcription Of Ian maxi Jackson Interview
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:26]
Yes, hello, Van listeners of Join Up Dots in your thousands in your milligramme. Now not millions yet, but he’s getting he’s getting that way. I don’t know if you know, why would you know, so I’m going to share with you as we were recording today, we hit number two in iTunes didn’t quite make the number one. But certainly that is only down to you guys who are listening in your droves, sharing and leaving those all important reviews on iTunes. Now I don’t ask many times, because it’s one of those cheesy things that other people shows do. But Philippines but having leaving the reviews and the five star reviews, I know it’s down to you guys as pushed us up to the top. So thank you so much for that. And thank you so much to today’s guest because he is going to deliver a powerhouse performant because we’ve already been chatting just before we started recording. And I’ll be honest, I like him very much. He’s English, he’s got an English approach to him. And his middle name is Maxi, I’ll be honest, I’m not sure if it was from birth, or he added it later. But he certainly fits extremely well in regards to his approach to life. He believes that we all have it in us to live our lives to the max and it’s not our situations, income lifestyles or anything else that holds us back. Other than quite simply ourselves. He qualified as a certified clinical hypnotherapist and worked for many years providing solutions orientated guidance for weight loss, smoking, and the elimination of phobias. Now his goal is to encourage clients to adapt and improve all aspects of their lives. By understanding the bite right by the road a mind plays in all our lives. And it’s not just individuals where he’s talents as a mind coach come to the poor, as he works with companies, organisations and individuals from his various experience as a business owner, sports coach, trainer, sales manager, and therapist he knows what they are going through. He’s the author of escape the mind trap, how to conquer your inner demons and can dig down past the stumbling blocks and self limiting beliefs that hold us all back and actually find the fears and anxieties that actually create the things that we think are holding us back, get rid of him and see your life change. So how has he managed to overcome the fears and concerns that stop the rest of us in our tracks? And does he see the same issues time and time again? And can he help us all and Join Up Dots make a step forward in our own pursuit of success? Well, let’s find out as we bring on to the show to start Join Up Dots but one and only Mr. Ian Maxie Jackson, how are you?
Ian Maxi Jackson [2:56]
Happy, relaxed and glad to be doing the show?
David Ralph [2:59]
Are you drunk? Ian? It does. It’s like eight o’clock in the evening. on a Thursday, you probably been at work all day. Have you already been down the pub
Ian Maxi Jackson [3:08]
already? Not a big drinker? To be honest, David. I won’t say that. I never drink but I probably have less than 10 to 12 units a year. So
David Ralph [3:18]
how do you get away with that?
Ian Maxi Jackson [3:19]
I tell you it’s not always easy. But yeah, I used to drink a little bit more when I was younger. But I was always a bit of a lightweight. So yeah, it’s not a big part of my life. To be honest. I’m just just in a good space just in a happy mood. So that’s all good.
David Ralph [3:33]
Cannot be honest with you. I’m a bit of a lightweight as well, I it’s taken me years to actually embrace the fact that I’m a lightweight, where now I drink as much in in a month as I used to drink in the lunchtime. And it’s getting less and less and less and less. I like something that I know my American audience don’t know what it is. But as English people adore it. I like a nice Shandy. What about you?
Ian Maxi Jackson [4:01]
A couple in the summer on a on a hot day on a very hot day. And I’ve had some good on my long cycle ride or had some exercise as a little treat. Yeah. And to bring that memories of my youth I’ll have a Shandy. But very, very rarely. You
David Ralph [4:16]
can’t be a shanty Kenya, really, Kenya is the ultimate is one of those dreams that when you drink it you come? Ah, yes, that is Bob.
Ian Maxi Jackson [4:25]
I’m not sure we’re supposed to admit that publicly. But we just have so Yeah, I agree with you.
David Ralph [4:29]
Absolutely. So let’s cut to the chase. It is Maxie, you’re sort of actual name or is it something that you have creatively added because it puts that extra spark into your professional life?
Ian Maxi Jackson [4:40]
It has been creatively added. It is it was actually a nickname. I’ve had it now for all about 1214 years. And you hit the nail on the head. Just just somebody described me as somebody who likes to do things to the max live life to the max and I thought it was rather tweeting rather quaint and it got put in in the middle. And it’s quite good. You know somebody Google’s me, they Google Ian Maxie Jackson, they’re more likely to find me they Google Ian Jackson, they’ll find 4050 different varieties of in Jackson. So it works. Well.
David Ralph [5:11]
Is it the pOH? Have you actually changed the officially?
Ian Maxi Jackson [5:14]
Not yet. I will do but I haven’t done that yet. So
David Ralph [5:18]
cuz I know a lady who changed her middle name to Skywalker. And it worked all right for quite a while. And she’s just recently had problems with getting a passport. She’s got a driving licence that says it. And everything on us all the official documentation says Skywalker. Except for I think it was her passport. And now she can’t leave the country because she’s a Jedi.
Ian Maxi Jackson [5:39]
Well, I also I heard a similar storey from somebody I met very briefly, whose friend was so embarrassed about his first name, he was Italian and it made it It sounded like it was a female’s name, not a male’s name. So he was determined to change it, changed it by deed poll, and change it to wild horse. And he liked people to refer to him as wild horse. And that was his official name.
David Ralph [6:02]
I’ll throw it out to you audience, email me or tweet your suggestions for my name, but it’s gonna be it’s gonna be manly and tough like wild horse. That’s good, isn’t it? I don’t want to be called Small hamster or something like that wild horse?
Ian Maxi Jackson [6:16]
David. Ralph, it’s got a ring to it that works in it.
David Ralph [6:19]
Yeah, that works. You see you, you’re changing me. And you’re bringing me to the max instantly. So Exactly. So how about you? Because I’m always fascinated by people that teach us to overcome their fears. How do you overcome your own fears? to begin with? How loud? Is it something that you just naturally do? Because you trained to do it for others? Or is it something that you can do for others, but you still have the same fears yourself?
Ian Maxi Jackson [6:47]
I think I think the truth of the matter is that fear isn’t something that you completely overcome. It’s not something that leaves you you know, fear is a recurring theme in people’s lives, not necessarily always the same fear. People can either defeat or manage some of their fears to a greater or lesser extent. But but but fears fears for most people, the majority of people going to be a recurrent theme, in terms of how I, I’ve managed to overcome my own contradict myself slightly there, but to manage my own fears is is just by what I recommend in the second part of the book is exposure. I mean, do you have a concept of what fear is a lot of people talk about fear, but don’t really know what they mean by fear?
David Ralph [7:42]
Well, I’m not scared of anything that can’t kill me. This is my thing. You know, if somebody says to you, you know, I’m scared of a spider. I don’t get that at all. Because I think unless I’m in the jungle somewhere, what’s going to hurt me. But if somebody says, I’m, I’m scared of sharks, I would think, yeah, you’re quite right to be scared of sharks, because he could actually beat you. So that’s where I kind of balance mine. Is it gonna kill me or not?
Ian Maxi Jackson [8:10]
Yeah. And absolutely. And I think that’s it. That’s a good market to have. But the question really is, and I’m not, I’m not pointedly saying it to you, but also to members, the people that might be listening is, what do we mean by fear? What is fear? And, you know, there could be many, many descriptions. And people have, you know, they have the old adage of false evidence appearing real and all those types of things. But that’s not specifically what fear is. Fear specifically, is an emotional response to a perceived threat. So when we think about that, you have to you have to say to yourself, well, the important word in that phrase is perceived. If you perceive it as a threat, then you understand that it’s your perception, not the actual reality of the thing that’s creating fear, then you have to challenge that perception. And the way to do that, and the way that top psychologists have talked about it is that you have to expose yourself to that fear. Now, that doesn’t mean that you have to jump in with two feet. And, you know, save you’re frightened of appearing in front of an audience or public speaking, you have to go from never having done a public speaking session, talking in front of a crowd of 1000 people. But what it may mean is just do a little presentation for two people, expose yourself to that fear, and then see whether it’s actually is there a threat? What is the threat? Or is it purely your perception, it’s just a perceived threat, not a real threat. Most of the things that we have fears about are imaginary threats, not not real threat. So that’s what I try and apply my own life. And that’s, that’s, that’s how I do it in my own life. And sometimes it works quickly. Sometimes it works more slowly.
David Ralph [9:54]
He’s fascinating when you you talk about perceived threats, because this show is is very much about encouraging people to shake up their shackles and move forward in their lives. If you’re stuck in a rut and you don’t like your situation, then try to change it. And so many people will email me and they will say, yeah, even though I started to feel this, this, this urge to do it. On Episode 30. We’re now up to Episode 190. And I still haven’t quite got it, it’s getting more is getting more is getting more. And they hold themselves back. Even though they desperately know in their heart of hearts, but there’s nothing to be scared about it. Which is strange, really, isn’t it? Well, why we do this?
Ian Maxi Jackson [10:40]
Yeah, I think one of the things that I mentioned in the in the book is that I’m not a great believer in the in the magic pill or the magic bullet or the you know, that change can happen in a heartbeat. It’s not It’s not my philosophy. And the reason it’s not my philosophy is I think that you can make radical decisions at the you can make big choices. And and and determine that you want to change direction, I think that can be done in an instant, or in a very short period of time. Or it may come through a source of inspiration on one of your shows through a book that somebody reads whatever it happens to be. And you reach that point, you say enough is enough, things have got to change. But here’s my point, is that the habits, and the the William James said, like life is a mess of habits. It’s that that’s what you that’s what most of us are, we are the things that we repeatedly do. And that doesn’t go away overnight. And and I believe that even though you can have a moment of decision a moment, a pivotal moment where you decide that things are going to be different things is going to change. The actual change is a process. And it takes longer than than a day or a week for it to be. And maybe for long lasting and significant change. It’s a process and it takes a period of time.
David Ralph [12:06]
So why do some people seem to be out but to be fearless. And you see that the movers and shakers and the zigs and zags, and they’re doing stuff, but for me, and mortals like the rest of us, we kind of think, Oh, my God, you know how they manage to do that? Because we all start as babies don’t wait, and we we grow up, and we die at the end of it. And we’re all exactly the same. So it’s just a series of choices that we’ve made. But is it as simple as both choices? Or is there you know, is it lifestyle? Is it peer group? Is it parents? I know, this is quite a deep and probably overarching question that I’m saying, but it always makes me wonder why some people seem to be able to deal with this kind of thing. And other people will just look at them dealing with it and not move themselves.
Ian Maxi Jackson [12:55]
I, my belief is that fear is is is reasonably innate in human beings, there’s certain things that we’re always going to be fearful of, and the great and the good. And the gurus and all these people that we talk off. I think it’s a nonsense to say that they don’t have fear. I think everybody has fear in various different elements. What I think that happens, the reason that they seem a million miles away from from the common man in the street, is that they, the answer to your question is that they practised managing the fear. And for most of them, it’s it’s practised, and it’s managed on out on a daily basis. So one of the things that I’ve done in my in in the past is I used to coach tennis. And an example that would point to the people is, is, you know, a Wimbledon champion. And I don’t know if you’re a tennis fan, or all your listeners are necessarily Tennis Fans, but normally what happens even when they get to the Wimbledon final, even when somebody is a world’s number one, the interviewer will will ask the player, you know, how you feel you nervous, you know, nervous is, is could be argued as a type of fear. You know, you’re you’re, you’re unsure of the outcome. But even the top players in the world, they have a fear that they’re scared to serve a match point, the fear is there. But what have they done, they’ve played so many matches throughout their lives, they practice managing that fear. And what a lot of tennis players do, especially the top ones is they have rituals, they have, they have a process that they know that they go through. So when the fear pops up, they know exactly what to do to manage themselves through that process. So the idea that the great and the good, don’t have fear. Personally, I feel that’s nonsense.
David Ralph [14:41]
But I think it’s nonsense, too, because I speak to people on a daily basis that we put it on the show. And we realise that they’ve got their success by stumbles and falls trials and tribulations and they moved through and I agree totally with you. But there’s different degrees of scared. And whatever you do in life, if you are moving forward, you’re going into a new area. And that is where you feel scared, you know, I can do a show where I start off all comfortable. Well, actually, I’ll be totally honest, every show I do. When I’m just about to press record, I think to myself, like okay, let’s get going, let’s get going. And I feel like butterflies and stuff, which is like the anticipation. And I think that’s a good thing to have. Because that gets you slightly on edge. And as soon as I get to the point that I haven’t got that, and I’m so Matter of fact, I think something will lose itself that a spark will go out somewhere. But I can then be quite comfortable doing a show. And then suddenly it dawns on me uncomfortable. And then suddenly the fear comes up. Which basically sort of saying to me, hang on, hang on, are you going through the motions here? Have you just relax too much? Get yourself back up and going. So I feel fear for all the shows. And since we’ve been recording for about quarter of an hour, I’ve probably felt three or four times when you’ve been talking and I’ve been thinking, What’s the next question to ask? And is it gonna be a sensible one? And no, I’ve got a better question here, because that one wasn’t as good and all that kind of stuff. So it is when when you manage the fear, it does raise your game, doesn’t it? It’s got to be, it’s got to be something that you have in your body to make you perform to a higher level. First of all,
Ian Maxi Jackson [16:22]
I agree. And it’s and the only way to do it. And this is again, going back to what I said earlier is exposure. Now what do I mean with that? Well, exposure means to experiment with the unknown. So this is what episode is this that how many of these have you done now?
David Ralph [16:37]
Well, your hundred 90 hundred nine, we’ve done about 210. Now,
Ian Maxi Jackson [16:42]
so yeah, hundred 90 210. So you’ve had 210 hours roughly, of practice of having that fear come up managing it. So you know, you’ve, you’ve experimented with the unknown, and and only by experimenting with the unknown, does the unknown become known? And you know how to manage yourself through that, maybe not perfectly, but you don’t need to know how to do it perfectly. And you know, the back of your mind, subconsciously, you’re going well, is this the best question it? Should I be answering this? And it’s like, well, in the past, what I did was I asked it anyway. And actually once asked the question, nobody died. I mean, really, the one of the biggest antidotes to fear is what is the worst that can happen? What is the worst that can happen? Now there are some things where, you know, if you can cross poison state snake in, in in the jungle or whatever, or in the in the grass? Well, the worst that can happen is that you may die from this experience. But the vast majority of things that we get fearful of now in the modern age, are really ridiculous. I mean, the things that we’re fearing a loss of face and embarrassment. And actually in the larger context, they make no sense. Another Another thing I’d like to put in perspective is that we have have humans have jewel needs and in so many different ways. So when you think believe correct me if I’m wrong, you have a fairly young child, is that correct?
David Ralph [18:09]
I have five children.
Ian Maxi Jackson [18:11]
five children. Wow. Okay, so how, How old’s the youngest?
David Ralph [18:15]
The youngest is nine and the oldest is 34. I think.
Ian Maxi Jackson [18:19]
Okay. Okay, so remembering back to when they were slightly younger. So when they’re kind of a toddler stage, one year old one and a half to that kind of age, you will, if you remember back, they have a completely jewel need. I mean, in the early stages in the first year of their life, maybe 18 months, they have a massive need for security. So as every parent will know, the child is always scanning to see whether mother is in the room where the mother is available, it’s a security thing. But we can’t live our whole lives based on on security and comfort. And, and toddlers know this is part of their their growth. So at some point, usually somewhere around the the the age to mark, curiosity comes into play once they can crawl, and once they can walk, and once they can start being curious, they want to explore. So we have a need for security in the sense of safety. Because if we’re unsafe, we risk death. But we also need to explore because if we don’t grow, we actually by definition become more unsafe. Because you have to you have to learn skills, you have to build strength, you have to explore you have to be curious. And that goes throughout the whole of life, we have jewel needs, which is slightly polarised. One is to be safe, and the other is to explore. And and that’s the battle that that’s what we’re playing with in life. You know, how much can I risk in this moment? Can I risk this question? Can I risk the potential embarrassment that you know that lack of safety, or do I need to call back and for those people that wants to stay comfortable and safe? Well, their lives, they never really hit the heights that they want to. And those people that are way too Cavalier May May overdo it may jump off the cliff. And, you know, that’s the end of it. And it’s it’s the challenge. And the and the fascination is finding that balance between security and exploration.
David Ralph [20:14]
We talked to people, as I say, every single day, and one of the things that we promote to the listeners is about if you want to change your situation, you have to become more aware of what’s out there. And that’s exactly what you’re saying you have to become curious. And so if you’re in a situation that is pretty poor, to say the least you’re in a job that you don’t like, one of the kind of normal traits is to go on leaving this job and pretty much go to another job, you’re in a insurance company, for example, you don’t mind working for that company. So you leave and you get another job in an insurance company, where by definition is going to be pretty similar. So you will be dealing with the same problems. What I found is the most successful people are the ones that are willing to look at other people situations and see where they can actually go. So they’re in that insurance company. And I’m sort of quoting myself here, really, and they start looking around on the internet, and they start listening to podcasts, and then reading blogs, and they’re seeing other things. And if you look at enough, been one of them will probably go, this could be it, I think I could just about do this. And then with the practice, you can then start moving forward into a different situation. But you’re never going to get there unless you are aware, unless you’re curious unless you look around because people are doing amazing things in the world. And you hear these storeys, and you talk to them, and they’re just like normal people. And you kind of think, how have you managed to this, that you’re living on a desert island with a laptop and you’re running these multinational companies and all that kind of stuff? When I’m stuck at my desk, nine to five in an office that I don’t like, how have you managed it. And they’ve managed it by being curious and pushing against their comfort zone all the time.
Ian Maxi Jackson [21:59]
Exactly. And again, going back to something that I talked about in the book, I took it right near the end of the book, I talk about a shift that, you know, there’s many changes in life which are which are incremental, small step by step. But at certain points in our life, we we have a complete shift. So things move. You know, it’s like a quantum leap, it’s a big change, I think very significant happens. Now the problem is, is a lot of people base their evidence on their past experience. So they will always, as in your example, always worked in insurance, the only model they have, if they look inwardly is is their experience, they’ve never a huge salary. They’ve never done the exciting, different lifestyle that they’ve never broken free. And that until all their reference points are internal. And and very much 100% agree with you what what needs to happen is if you don’t have a model, within your own world from your own environment, then seek out those models seek out those storeys, and there’s some really inspirational people out there. And and you’re hundred percent right, the The amazing thing is, is that we I don’t know, there’s a particularly English thing, I don’t know whether it happens in other parts of the world. But we do tend to put successful people on this pedestal. I mean, I’ve been lucky enough in my lifetime sit to meet a variety of people. I had a girlfriend many years ago, who was in the film industry. And I met one or two a listers, and I met, you know, a handful of a listers. And you spend time with these people. And you think, Oh my god, they’re real. They’re real people, you know, they have real concerns, they have to go about their everyday life. And I was also a few years ago was a personal trainer and investment bank. And these are people that quite literally earning or worth 10s of millions of pounds, not all of them, but some of them, you know, 10s of millions. Now for most people, that’s not a figure that, that that registers on, you know, in their brains, but and I remember the first few times that I got to know them, I was training them I was thinking, this guy’s worth or this lady’s worth an absolute fortune. But they have to do all most of the things that everybody else has to do. They have to get through their day, and they have little concerns. How are their children doing at school? You know, what are they going to eat at the weekend? Do you know that? I’m not saying that they’re identical, but that incredibly normal people and sometimes that bright, but sometimes you think well actually this person isn’t the most intelligent person I’ve ever met that nice. I like them. But they have their faults and they have their their quirks and and everybody does you know and and even even to the extent I’ve met in my many years ago, I worked at a place called Bisham Abby, which is a national sports centre.
David Ralph [24:40]
And I used to go to
Ian Maxi Jackson [24:42]
England Yeah, what I don’t think they do anymore. But back when I was there, which was in the late 90s, certainly, they used to train there. And again, you, I didn’t spend massive amounts of time with these people, but I met them I met them in passing. And again, it’s like, the flesh and blood, the real the human, you know, they have to deal with a lot of the same things that we will have to deal with. They just focused and dedicated themselves to a certain arena, use their abilities, you know, and and, and learned and had role models in their lives, and found a way to reach the level that they wanted to get to.
David Ralph [25:16]
So with our target audience, our listeners out there, now they’ve got their headphones on, and they’re sitting at work, or they’re on the bus, or they’re on the train going to work, and they want to change their life. And we’ve already discussed that there are a certain amount of fears that are in all of us, and we have to overcome. But it also seems to me that the fears are amplified, because we like to see the highlights of the successful people’s lives. And we look at them, and we see them on the red carpet, or we see them doing whatever they are. And we just kind of think it’s easy. It’s just easy. They’ve got some kind of quality, they’ve got some trait that makes it easy for them. And what’s the point of me doing that, it’s never going to work, because they are different than us. And what you’re quite rightly saying is, they’re not different at all. They’ve just taken different choices. And they’ve just focused and they’ve worked very hard on a certain thing. I was I was having a chat with a chap the other day, and he is a BAFTA winner. And he was at the Baptist, and he was standing in the toilet just about to go on. And there was a chap next to him literally shaking, he said, and he turned around and said, You know, you’re lying, he was going home? No, I don’t think I should be here. It’s not really me. I don’t feel very comfortable. And he turned out to be LL Cool J. And he was sort of saying, you know, but your culture, you should be really relaxed. And he was scared because it wasn’t his environment to be in. It wasn’t where he was supposed to be comfortable. But we were just kind of think in that regard. Okay, you’re successful, you’re a rapper, your best in your bat, you should be able to deal with all situations. But he was psyching himself up to go. But then when he walks on stage, he’s kind of conquered those fears. As you say, he’s moved on, we don’t see. But behind the scenes, do we just think it’s okay for him?
Ian Maxi Jackson [27:06]
I think I think the the little chatter that people have in their head,
causes themselves to it doesn’t matter. You know, what level you reach in life, there’s always the little voices is fairly constant in most people’s lives. It’s always going to question you know, the question, two, or three of the questions that go through most people’s minds most days of their life is, you know, am I worthy? Am I worthy of whatever it is? Am I worthy to be manager? Am I worthy to be a father? Am I worthy to be an international pop star? You know, am I worthy? And of course, you’re worthy. You know, am I good enough? Is this it? Is it is this what it’s supposed to be? And I think these are fairly universal questions, I don’t think they’re just for, you know, the average guy guy in the street, I think it’s some user questions that are going to come into the, you know, the great and the good, are going to have the same questions running through their head, they don’t go away, I don’t think there’s a point where people reach where suddenly, all this stuff just disappears. I think the key is to find ways to manage it, knowing that these questions that you know, the doubts, the insecurities, these things, to a different extent, and to a different degree are going to raise whatever you’re doing, and I think they’re going to be there, you’re going to question yourself. And it doesn’t matter what level you you attain, those, those doubts and those fears, to some level will still remain. I mean, the classic example, and it may be something you’ve discussed with previous people you’ve had on your show, you know, however, many weeks ago, it was Robin Williams, top of his game, you know, revered, wonderful guy. But still, a big part of what happened to him was was just that kind of doubt about, you know, who am I? Is this is this it? Is this what I should be doing? What what happens from here, and it got to him, unfortunately, sadly, in the end, so it doesn’t disappear. And so I think that another aspect that I talked about in the book is his process. And and people been way more focused on process and how they manage their mind, how they manage that, you know, the the negativity that may come up, and not seeing it as an all or nothing equation. Not that, that I think the phrase you used earlier was to overcome that you’re not going to overcome fear. It’s, it’s always there’s always going to be an element of it in life is one managed through fear. How do I manage through doubts? How do I manage through these experiences, and get good at it and practice it and learn from how other people do it? I think that’s far more valuable. It’s you know, you’re teaching this skill of managing through those experiences, rather than than thinking you’re going to defeat it forever.
David Ralph [29:52]
Well, let’s talk about that, because the process fascinates me. But I’m going to play motivational speech from Jim Carrey Now, because this is kind of a nice segue into making that transition. And then again, things that frighten you the most dc Jim Carrey,
Jim Carrey [30:07]
my father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [30:34]
So if people find the thing that they love, as Jim is saying in there, does that make it easier? Or does it make it harder, because there’s so much more for them to lose, because it’s something that they really, really want?
Ian Maxi Jackson [30:50]
I don’t honestly know if I know the exact concept of that. And I personally, I’ve always struggled with finding the thing that I love.
I think there’s people out there that have an inner knowing, and they and and they just kind of know,
David Ralph [31:06]
did you not love what you’re doing at the moment, then?
Ian Maxi Jackson [31:08]
I absolutely I do. Absolutely I do. But
I I always crave variety in my life. I’ve always craved new experiences, I’m you know, for one of a better word, I’m a creative, I like new things. I like new projects, I like new stuff. And my one of my big purposes in life is to get people to understand how the mind works. And, and, and have a really deep understanding of that. And it is a big passion for me, and it is a love for me. But, you know, took me many years to find that out. But I think there’s a lot of people, or there may be a lot of people listening, you think well, I don’t know, I don’t know that there is something that that the one thing that I love, there obviously are people that love acting, that’s all they ever want to do with that life. Well, I love writing, you know, JK Rowling’s born to write would write every opportunity. But I think there’s a possibility there’s people out there that think, actually, I love more than one thing, you know, I actually get a kick out of this, and I get a kick out of that. I love my music and I love you know, for example, I I’m fascinated by the mind, and it’s something that I’m always happy to talk about and excites me every time I talk about it. But it’s not my only love. There’s things that I love with an equal passion. I love nature, I love being out in nature, if you deprive me of nature, you know, you starve myself at night. So do I love talking and discussing and learning and exploring the mind? Or do I love nature? I love them both equally. But I think there’s people out there that say no, that’s, that’s it. That’s what I love. That’s what I was born to do. And that’s what I’m always going to do.
David Ralph [32:45]
But But yeah, but to think of a way of earning an income out of nature, because that’s the thing that people struggle with, I think is we always talk about Find your passion, find your passion, and you’ll never work again. And people will try trying to find that thing. And a lot of the time you find it and you kind of know it. And one of the things that has come out in this show time and time again, is the things that you the generally your passion in is the things that you were doing when you were as a small child. So imagine as a small child, you love nature. And yes, as it’s more challenging, resonated with the way people take. But then you get to go through the education system, and you get somewhat, and you get into responsibilities. And you go and get a job just because it’s a job and you start going on a path which isn’t naturally yours. So when we sort of connect our past to build our future, which is the tagline, one of the things that we say is to look at what you do as a youngster, and a lot of people will say to me, I used to love doing that. I used to love doing this. But it’s been how you structure it to make money. That’s the hard bit, you seem to be able to find your passion reasonably easy, but actually main overcoming the beliefs, but Oh, I can’t make money on this. Because it’s something that I like, work has to be hard and all those kinds things.
Ian Maxi Jackson [34:01]
I’m sure, different people have different views in terms of what order should come in. But I would argue that you you you live, you Live Your Passion first. And and you you pursue your passion, your passions, plural, or your labs plural in my case. And and and then you put it together and you find out how you by following your passion, how you can find solutions. You know, the the big cliche is, it’s about finding solutions for other people’s problems. And you’re right, I love nature, I love reading, I love cycling this rule. And you’re right, again, these are all things that I absolutely adored in my in my childhood and have stayed with me. And I don’t even think it was conscious. But the the one that makes the most sense in terms of generating an income is is is finding solutions and helping people with with problems related to how they manage their mind. But I would, and I’m sure other speakers or people you’ve spoken to, would say the same thing. It’s something I would do anyway, if I got paid nothing. And and somebody wanted to talk and, and and move through challenges they had psychological, I would do it anyway. And I think that people that love what they do that, then that’s what they’re going to do.
David Ralph [35:17]
I love doing what I’m doing now. And I’ve worked for many companies, and there has been part of the job that I enjoy doing. But I don’t think I’ve ever loved doing it. Like I love doing this, I am loving talking to you. And I will be loving talking to the next person and the next person. And at the moment, I can’t perceive a time when that’s going to diminish, to be able to actually tap into these people and bind their experiences and understand the struggles. I just feel like this is something that I was born to do. And I do I love it, love it, love it, love it. And for many, many months when I was getting the show going, I wasn’t earning a penny, I was just basically doing it. But I was still running up the office every single day thinking I’ve got another seven today, you know, because it’s just fascinating to me to have these these moments when it’s just you and me. And we are chatting, and ultimately is going to go out as a show. But that isn’t part of my remit. When I’m doing it really, I keep a kind of vague realisation but I need to provide to the listener, but ultimately is a kind of very selfish thing. I am fascinated what will what you’re talking about?
Ian Maxi Jackson [36:32]
Well, I, again, going back to a world that I know and apologies for any of your listeners that aren’t sports fans or sports fanatics, but hopefully they’ll understand the concept. I genuinely believe you take the top golfers, the top tennis players, the top sneaker players or American football players, what baseball players, they’re going to they’re going to do that thing. They’re not thinking I generally don’t think that Rory McIlroy, for example, is is the world’s number one golfer, it would be easy to say, Well, he doesn’t care about the money because he has lots of it. But he’s not pursuing the money. He’s doing it because it is his passion. And you’re right, you did this show, you may not have known with all certainty whether it was going to come good for you, and it was going to become a money spinner for you. But you have to follow your heart a little bit you know, I am a bit of a an idealist a bit of a dreamer in that respect. If you’re not doing the things that you want to tour the things that you love, then, then why you doing it? I know a question that I did try and prep a little bit for for this show. And one of the things that you ask a lot of people is, you know, what are you doing now? What are you up to, and at my house tonight, as well, I spend most of my time doing things that I love the things that we’ve talked about, you know, I actively go out and walk in nature every single day, two or three hours a day sometimes because I love it. You know I base my daily life now around doing things that I know I love and then you can find it but I wouldn’t be too contrived and in finding a bridge between what you love and and the income as you call it or the or whatever it’s just do that. First, seek the passion first find the love find. Find what you know rocks, your boat sets you on fire, find that first and then keep pursuing it. And and and then to use your phrase Join Up Dots and find a way to make it work for you. But I maybe I’m wrong. Maybe Maybe I’m not. But I am JK Rowling wasn’t now a billionaire, if she was still a struggling artist, I think she’d still be writing books all these years later. Because that’s what she always did. It was you know, it was in our DNA. I would I
David Ralph [38:39]
think he’s Episode 167, which is a gentleman called Peter Stuart Smith. I’m just scrolling back to see if it was a Yeah, Peter Stuart Smith, and he is an author. And he was telling me about there’s a chap who is somewhere in England, and he’s now in the Guinness Book of Records, because he has written more things but had never been published. Man, anyone else on earth. And he’s basically written every single day, since he was a small boy to his 80s or whatever. And not one piece has ever been published. And you kind of think to him said, Well, I kind of said, Well, he’s not a failure, because he’s in the Guinness Book of Records. You know, I’m talking about him now. So he’s left his mark somehow. But the fact that he’s still doing it, doing it doing it and never really expects to get paid. That says a lot about the human state, doesn’t it?
Ian Maxi Jackson [39:31]
Well, I think a very obvious example of what you’re talking about there is, as we say, in England, Vincent van Gogh. And as they say, in the States, Vincent van Gogh, you know, if you measured his life by his bank account, by the time he died, by all accounts, he was a failure.
David Ralph [39:49]
Well, why is it? Why is it that the real creative people are willing to do something for us absolutely no monetary rewards. And more often than not, they don’t get any monetary rewards. But they’re still willing to do it time and time and time again, it seems strange as I’m talking to you now that we’re talking about finding your path, creating a passion building an income based around it been the real, Uber successful people, I’ve been some bank robbers, he was saying, that didn’t come into the equation at all. It was just, it was just doing it. And I imagined with him. He just had a room of him. And that was it. You know, it was just a fact that he loved doing it. And he didn’t care about money.
Ian Maxi Jackson [40:39]
Well, let’s, let’s reverse this around. Let’s flip it around a little bit, you know, I, I had the opportunity, as I said, to work as a personal trainer, within an investment bank, and let people put aside, you know, whether they feel positively or negatively about investment banks is not really discussion about that. But I met two different types, when I was there, two very different types, those that, that absolutely loved the world of banking, they truly did. And they made a huge amount of money, because they were excited to be for whatever reason to go into that environment at the beginning of the day, and and that was their passion. And I made other people who actually managed to climb the tree, and when earning an awful lot of money, and pretty much hated every minute that they were there. And that’s when you realise that the people, some people have got the order wrong. You know, I’ve seen I, as I’m sure you haven’t, as many other people will have done, I’ve seen a lot of people who worth a lot of money and found really great ways to generate big incomes. And they’re not very happy. And they’re not doing what they love. And they’re not passionate. So rather find things that you love, that you’re passionate about that that you that feel authentically, you
David Ralph [41:56]
know it, isn’t it that is it the authentically you bit, yeah, he’s,
Ian Maxi Jackson [42:00]
you know, one of the, you know, you talk about joining up the dots and, and the things that you learn as, as life goes on, as you get a little bit older. And one of them is just allow yourself to be more authentic. Just allow yourself to, to be the person that you know, you are deep down inside. And I don’t think that’s, you know, fluffy, or anything else. We all have different roles. We all have a reason to be here. And one of the big experiences that I’ve had in my life and massive, you know, life changing experiences is that I went on something called a vision quest, actually with somebody that you’ve interviewed previously a guy called Jerry hide.
David Ralph [42:39]
Oh, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you didn’t take a grave. And Laney I had
Ian Maxi Jackson [42:44]
no, I didn’t know, we didn’t go quite that far. I think I had the scaled down version. But I did sit under a tree in a 12 foot circle for four days,
David Ralph [42:52]
I laughed all the way through our interview, he, he’s got such a kind of dark side, he’s character.
Ian Maxi Jackson [42:58]
He was very easy, very amusing guy. But you know, it really challenged me and it really challenged me but by the end of it, and so you’re, you’re steeped in nature, for anybody that wasn’t able to listen to that show. You stick to nature for four days, and you’re on your own, so you have no human contact. So for four whole days, and you don’t eat, you just you just drink water, keep hydrated. And you’re just left to your own devices and with your own thoughts. And many things change from you. But one thing that I really got, because I was in the absolutely beautiful scenic location, in a field of wild flowers in the middle of right in the heart of the French countryside. It was absolutely delicious. But I was steeped in nature for days. And by the end of it, I just nature just does its own thing, you know that the flowers are doing their own thing, and the trees are doing their own thing. But they don’t. They’re not. Obviously they don’t have minds. But the flowers and aspiring to be a tree, the tree isn’t aspiring to be a blade of grass, you know, the beta, the flatter isn’t aspiring to be the mountainside. They just live completely into whatever it is they they were born to do. And it was it was just a strong metaphor for me. You know, we talked earlier about how could How is it some people become these incredibly successful multi millionaire actors or actresses or singers? Or it may be that that’s not what you would you’re designed to do. You know, it’s just authentically, what what is your calling authentically? Not? Because it would be great? Wouldn’t it be great to in the 10s of millions but authentically? What is your heart calling you to do? Follow that first and then find a way to make it pay? That would be my personal advice.
David Ralph [44:44]
When you when you’re talking about nature, it’s so obvious because it’s all around us, isn’t it? It is every single item is being purely authentic to its Yes. And we’re back the only things that armed and it is glueing. But really bad. You know, Ian Maxie Jackson can be the best version of Ian Maxie Jackson and anyone on earth because it’s him. But more often than not, and I’ve done it myself, I’ve gone into careers. And because of the vibe, and I’m doing those little quirky things with my fingers. In offices, I’ve kind of played a role because I thought that’s what was expected of me because that’s how other people perform. And when I became myself, I used to get tarnished as being a maverick, or, or not too serious. And I look back on it now. And I think, yeah, that’s exactly what I should have been doing all the time, I should have been being myself, I wasn’t, I was being some kind of weird version that was kind of expected of me. And somebody said to me the other day and and this really struck home as well. And he was talking about nature. And he said, If you plant a tree in the ground, that tree is going to be the biggest version that tree can possibly be. And if you put the cheetah on the ground, and you let it run, it will run as fast as that Cheetah can go. But humans are the only ones that will hold themselves back as well and be smaller versions of what they possibly could be. And now when you were saying that, to me, that was kind of Oh my god. Yes. You know, it, was it that was a mindset shift as well.
Ian Maxi Jackson [46:18]
Yes. Well, the first people talk about it were Plato and Aristotle. It goes that far back, you know, we, and unfortunately, we’ve lost, we’ve lost touch with, you know, the lessons from nature, I don’t want to get, you know, Chuck go too overboard on this. But it’s very important in my life. And it’s a simple lesson. And it’s a very accessible lesson. It’s a very, you know, hopefully for most people that even if they live in a town or a city, you know, take the time, if you haven’t done it in the last month, or six months, or however long make the effort to go out in nature and don’t try and look for answers and solutions and lessons, but just absorb yourself in nature. And and and you’ll just get it. It’ll just kind of infuse into you. You just think Actually, yeah, it makes sense. I mean, one of the great things with with spending time in nature is it’s very, it is very honest, it’s very truthful. I mean, with so much of the way that we live now is fabricated. You’d have neon lights and shiny objects and, and things that we don’t need things that are superfluous, but there’s a truth and an honesty in nature. And, and so when. And the reason I hopped on about this for a while is because what I learned from nature is what we’ve just discussed is authenticity. And I think there’s a big lesson that maybe your listeners will get if they if they take the time to go and re immerse themselves. In the natural world.
David Ralph [47:41]
I agree with you be be authentic, it’s so much easier being yourself. And yes, it is, it’s beyond that easy when you when you realise that you are being totally who you should be a lot of stuff that I used to struggle with, I now don’t do, because I look at it now. And I think I do couldn’t really do that I wasn’t my strength. And now I’m pretty much constructed based around something that I can do. And hopefully I’m getting better at doing it as well. So my strengths are getting stronger. And sometimes I think to myself, I can’t believe this is a job. This is just too much fun. Why shouldn’t it be? And I suppose it kind of goes back to you? Am I worth it? and all that kind of stuff. You’ve had these doubts that come in, but I’m enjoying this so much. How can I you know, how can I be paid for this, you know, there must be some person that’s going to drag me off this stolen his microphone and say, you know, get back to the factory, whatever, because that’s what life should be. But I don’t believe that is now and I you know, I keep on saying that all the listeners, really listen to yourself and think about yourself and think about the things you used to love doing. Because the answer is bear somehow the answer is bear. And you just need to be quiet and separate yourself from life. He’s you know, he’s not surprised why all be the Uber successful people meditate and and that’s that’s been something that’s been a surprise to me. I used to it was kind of weird, Hocus Pocus yoga kind of sitting, levitating three feet off the ground. But now when I speak to these people, and I always say yeah, my first hour of the day is just quiet, with no mobile phones and nothing and you think, yes, you’re just allowing yourself to make plans and decide what’s right for you. And just doing what’s right, exactly as nature does, each just quietly doing its thing until we notice it as opposed.
Ian Maxi Jackson [49:31]
Yeah. I love that you brought up meditation. And the big thing for me. So as part of the second part of the book, when I talk and I said, you know, change is a process if you want to make these breakthroughs, that there’s a process to it. And ironically enough, the very first step in that process is awareness. And bringing awareness to the fact that the vast majority of what people do is is just live out their their habits and their routines and their rituals, ones that were Roan. Many of them were erroneously chosen in their younger days. And they and they just repeat, repeat, repeat. And and the best way to break that cycle is to bring awareness to understand that actually, these things that I do on a day to day, week by week month basis, I just patents and and there’s a certain inertia to it. And it and and so people are living unconsciously, not really conscious of that. They’re not making choices, that they’re just performing the same rituals day in day out. And awareness is isn’t the very first step to change that. And the best step towards awareness, either meditation, for me my background, hypnotherapy, self hypnosis, that type of thing, or yoga that there’s other avenue. There’s other ways to it. But there would be three very key ways to introduce awareness into people’s lives. I’ve stopped watching TV,
David Ralph [50:54]
I, if I’m watching TV, I can’t focus on it anyway, because my mind is thinking about other stuff. Anyone going to room now. And I used to sort of go in the room, sit on the sofa and think I was on the telly and just turn the TV on. But now more often than not, I would just sort of sit there. And my family used to come in and go, what’s the matter with you. And like it was kind of a bad thing that I was just sitting there quietly. But now they kind of walk in and they realise I’m just having a moment. And I’m just sort of not even reflecting I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m just kind of sitting there quietly. But it’s so powerful. And I’ll be sitting there not even thinking about anything. I mean, suddenly, something that I didn’t even know that I was thinking about suddenly comes to me and I think, yes, that’s what I should be doing. And I’ve had huge leaps, certainly doing this, where something that maybe my subconscious is is playing around with suddenly comes to the fore just because I’m allowing it to because I’m just quiet. And I’m not thinking of anything. And it’s almost like you’ve got that, that kind of you when you see somebody and you kind of vaguely Yes, I think I know the name and you can’t quite place it. And then you’re just dropping off at night. And when you say go in a bank is got, and I’m finding that more and more just because I’m allowing myself to have that breathing space from from noise and computers and all that kind of stuff.
Ian Maxi Jackson [52:12]
Well, it’s something that challenges a lot of people not saying everybody rich challenges a lot of people, you know, just look around, just look around at the people that you see and think just watch them trying to fill the time trying to constantly fill the space. And with what, but people you know, TV is one example. But you know, it’s kind of moved from there. I mean, be honest with yourself, people, how many hours do you spend on social media? Why do we feel the need to fill this time to fill these gaps. And people have to pause, they have to pause between activities allow themselves the space that you talked about, and allow awareness just to creep into their life. And you can’t just do it as a one off deal. You can’t just go you know what I’m going to try on a bit of awareness tomorrow. awareness has to be a practice it has to become a skill. Now whether you choose to meditate, spend time in nature, you know, choose hypnotherapy, yoga, or some other form vehicle for that, you have to and I mentioned this in the book, you have to find a way that awareness becomes something that you introduce on a on a regular daily basis, so that you can see what your mind is doing. You can see the chatter you can hear the chatter. And you can just be more more conscious of what you’re doing to yourself.
David Ralph [53:35]
I realised I only sort of looking back, I’ve been on this path for a while. But I’ve never had a mobile phone. And I never wanted one. And it was it was just a point. Really, it got to the point where people were forcing one on me. And if anyone forces stuff on me, I instantly push back. It’s just my character. And when our bellies, sorry, the rebellious time, the rebellious time. Yeah, I suppose that’s true. And then when I was at work, and I was saying, right, okay, you’re your senior manager, you need to have a mobile phone. I used to say why. And I go, Well, what happens if we need you in the evening? I said, Well, you can’t get me. I’m not a politician. I’m not the president of America. You know, once I’ve done my hours, it’s my own time. So I used to push back, push back, push back. So I’ve never had a phone and I still haven’t got one. And it used to annoy people a lot. But I couldn’t contact me. And then it made me realise that actually, that’s not my problem. My problem is, well, their problem is that they can’t contact me when they want it is not my problem. But then I stopped wearing a watch as well. Because I used to think to myself, do I really need a watch. And there’s always clocks everywhere, and you can look on your computer, and you can look on your phone, you can look wherever you want, there’s a watch. So I stopped wearing a watch. And now I’m doing this, I realised that actually what I’ve been doing is moving myself to the point where my life I would like is bad, I SWAT up and I do the shows. And I edit them and I push them out. And then that’s it dumb. And I’m not involved in social media, I don’t turn the computers on and I just live life and I just kind of, I’m just doing stuff. And it’s it’s been something that I’ve realised now that I think I’ve started training myself to the point that I’m happy with that and other people are happy as well. And other people are happy about I’m not on social media all the time. Other people are happy that they can’t find me when they want. Other people are happy. And it’s taken me about five years to get that point. So if you are engulfed in it, because you are middle management, whatever it is, it’s almost impossible, isn’t it really to break free? Because even if you want to do it, you’ve got the peer pressure of everybody else wanting to get you at every moment of the day just because they’re involved in it as well.
Ian Maxi Jackson [55:50]
Well, I think, you know, I’m not saying this is a complete solution, but it’s something you can’t become defeated by it, you have to find a way there is always a way. I mean, the direction that I would point people, if they’re not yet aware of it is is to Tim Ferriss, and the four hour workweek. I mean, I think one of the things that I’ve learned as you get older is, I don’t need to keep adding more, I don’t need more and more technology, I don’t need more and more ways to get hold of people, I don’t need all these additional things, I don’t need TV, I don’t need all these extra stimuli. What I need is to simplify and and to just take things out of my life, take the distractions out of my life, and just stick to the things I love. I mean, it leaves so much time for what you enjoy. You know, some people may think, wow, you know, in Mexico Jackson, what he he walks in nature for two or three hours a day, How the hell can he do that? Well, I don’t spend two or three hours watching TV, you know, so if you simplify your life, and just, there’s a concept called the big rocks theory, which is where you put the big rocks in place. First, what are the things that you want to do, you know, I want to go on cycle rides, I want to spend time in nature, I want to connect with things typically with people that I love, you know, I want to read, I want to work on the projects I want to. So I factor those in first. Now, if there’s any time left, after all that for all the erroneous things, you know, the crazy things that people do, then all well and good, I’ll do them. But I factor in the big things first. And I think a lot of people just spend time on the small things, small stuff, small stuff, looking at their watch it watching TV and all the other distractions that we allow ourselves. And the big things just never happen because they haven’t left any space for them.
David Ralph [57:35]
Let’s play the words of Steve Jobs is the theme of the show. And I’ve been grappling whether I’m going to play bees, because it hasn’t really fitted into our normal conversation that we have on Join Up Dots. But I am fascinated to get your point of view on these words. So this is Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [57:53]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking back words 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leaves you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [58:28]
Now I’m going to ask you a different question. But do you think that if more people believe those words, more people would take a chance on getting that dream life that we’re talking about?
Unknown Speaker [58:41]
quite quite possibly,
Ian Maxi Jackson [58:43]
I think that one of the fears that people have is that things aren’t going to work out. As it almost as if you know will? The question is, is it all predestined? Or is it not predestined? You know, am I going to be one of the lucky ones? Or am I not? Now I have a like what he says Steve Jobs says, I have my own take on it. And here’s my take, I don’t necessarily believe that everything happens for a reason. I know some people do, and I respect that view. But here’s what I do believe I do believe that you can find a reason for everything that happens. And I and and i think that’s just as valid. And just as worthwhile. You know, there’s going to be twists and turns there’s going to be unexpected things. What you do is you take what you’re presented with, and and you think okay, that’s happened now, whether it was a challenge, whether it was something you perceive as negative, whatever it is, it’s like it’s happened now. And I’m gonna and I’m going to create a reason for it for it. And
another guy that you interviewed recently
trying to remember his name Richard, Richard is McCann is a Richard McCann.
David Ralph [59:51]
Yes, absolutely. Yeah.
Ian Maxi Jackson [59:53]
Yeah. Nobody would wish that on anybody would wish his storey on anybody. And you I think that any listener that doesn’t know, Richard is he’s actually somebody that I write about in the book, who had the most traumatic childhood. You know, his mother was a prostitute that was killed by a serial killer. Now, was that destiny was that fate? Who knows. But what is so amazing about Richard is that he took what happened his life, and he, he, he found a way to use it for the good. He found the reason that these things that happened to him, he joined up his dots. So maybe not everything happens for a reason. But certainly you can find a way to use it, whatever happens to you, you can find a way to use it for the good.
David Ralph [1:00:37]
So you would go by the no experience is wasted.
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:00:42]
You can use all experiences. And and and use it to the best way to use a negative experience for the good or have an experience and not be wasted is to take the learning from that experience, and use it to help other people. I mean, there’s so many things that people you wouldn’t wish on anybody on your worst enemy. But people that have lived through those experiences, they take a learning from it. And it only becomes truly valuable when they share that learning with other people and allow and allow change to happen as a result of that learning. This I mean,
David Ralph [1:01:16]
there’s when when you look back on your life, and you are where you are now, can you connect your dots? Or is it the case that you’re, as you’re saying, your mind is making the Connexions? Or is it sort of leaps of faith stumbles and falls that have led you to this path? Has it been a conscious progression that you’ve made to where you are the author and you on this show?
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:01:42]
And I don’t think No, I don’t think it was fully conscious. I think I think if I’m really honest, I think it was more than kind of stumble and fall. But I I believe and I talked about in the book that there’s two hemispheres in the brain, the left and the right hemisphere, which are often very missing, understood. But one of the things that we do primarily for the left side of the brain, is that we create a narrative of our life, we create a storey you know, most people we love, we love storeys, we love storytellers, why because that’s what we do. As human beings, we create the storey around our life. So what I do is yes, by joining the dots, but what I’m what I’m very aware of is that it is a storey that I’ve created, but that’s my choice I choose to be now more so in the last few years of my life, I want to be the director of the storey of my life rather than a bit part actor within it. You know, so it’s like, okay, here’s the storey, here’s, here’s the storey that I want to tell from my life, here’s the message I want from my life. Because I believe that’s a big part of what we do. And I’ll take the experiences, and I’ll take the storey as I see it. And I’m going to direct that storey and and and projected into the future into a way that suits me serves me best and, and and adds value to other people.
David Ralph [1:03:00]
That’s brilliant. You’ve written the title of today’s show, but director of his own life, because that’s really what we want from everyone, isn’t it? But they’ve taken that responsibility they they’ve realised, but they’re only on this planet once. And unless they make these decisions to direct their own movie, they are just going to have a war compound somebody else’s film, and who wants that? You want? Why can’t you get your own town out there? I think that’s brilliant.
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:03:28]
Thank you. Thank you, David. I mean, I have a lady who I consider very much show one of my key mentors at the moment. And she expresses it like this, he says, You’re either one of two things, you’re either the cause, or you’re the effect, or you are the cause of what’s happening. Or you are the effect. Now when you were working insurance and, and the hat didn’t fit and you didn’t feel like you’re in the right place you were at the effect was like, well, I gotta go in there. And whatever happens, I accept it. Now you’re the course now you’re the Creator, you’re the director, you will whatever happens, you cause it to happen, and there’s so much power, and there’s so much energy in that compared to just being at the effect of everything that’s happening around you.
David Ralph [1:04:09]
So where is your movie going to go? Now you’ve got the director’s cut, and you’re working towards Episode Three of Ian, Maxie and the Temple of Doom or whatever it could be, that would be quite a good one. What are you aiming for in your life, you have a mind coach, you’re an author, you’re a public speaker, you create positive environments for everyone that comes into your life. And you’ve certainly done that on the show today. So as you’re sitting here, wherever you planning to go,
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:04:41]
Well, I believe now in keeping as I said slightly earlier in the conversation, keeping things simple. So rather than having 100 different things happen in my lifetime, I actually believe and and I know from from the storytelling in movies, that the whole idea of a of a movie, or certainly a lot of Hollywood movies, is when you lead the idea is that you get a message and elixxir you know that you’re taking through this journey. And at the end of it, there’s, there’s, there’s something that’s left with you, you know, that the person that had nothing can make good, or there’s some message that comes out of it. So my goal now going forward for the next 20 3040 years, however many years it is, it’s just at the end of my life, there’s there’s two things that I want to do. And I want to have a very clear message that I send out to the world. And, and I want to be an example for that message. And that’s it. And that’s how I want the storey to, to pan out. And my message. This is not the complete message. But it’s it’s the it’s the seed of the message is, you’re not your mind. You don’t have to be your mind. And you’re not your storey and you are the director of your life.
David Ralph [1:06:02]
Let’s send you back in time now and pass a message to you younger self, if you could get the young Ian Jackson before the Maxi part come in, what advice would you give them? And what age em would you want to speak to? So this is the part of the show that we called a sermon and a mic and I’m going to play the theme music and you’re gonna be transported back in time. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Unknown Speaker [1:06:29]
We go with
Unknown Speaker [1:06:32]
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:06:47]
Don’t miss anything in if you have an opportunity, take it. What’s the worst that can happen? Just go for it. I’m talking to the adolescent in the 14 year old, the one who’s a little bit scared now a little bit frightened. Take the opportunities, what have you got to lose? explore, be curious, see what’s out there. Don’t just focus on the big stuff. It’s not about the outcome about the big victories. Enjoy the little moments, take time to stop and smell the roses. Just get fascinated by the little things in life, the little details, learn to meditate. Don’t have your mind just whirl away and just keep you trapped. Take time, take time out. Become aware of what how you’re thinking and what you’re thinking. Don’t be afraid of failure, embrace failure. It’s a part of life, it’s okay to fail. It’s okay to mock up. It happens to
Unknown Speaker [1:07:43]
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:07:45]
Take time to help others. You may not know it now, but helping others is really a big part of what you’re here for. And it feels so much better than trying to self serve yourself. Don’t always think that the answer is over there. That it’s that the best times are two years ahead or three years ahead, and you’ve just got to get past what’s right in front of you. Now life is what’s two inches in front of your face. Enjoy what’s here, now, here and now. And stop worrying about what’s going to happen two years from now three years from now. 10 years from now. You’re absolutely wonderful, just as you are. Stop all this, I’m not good enough. I need to be something else. If only I was like her. If only I was like him. You’re wonderful as you are. You’re not perfect, you’re imperfect. And that’s okay. But believe me, you’re not broken. If you’re imperfect, you’re going to always work at being better than you are. But don’t ever believe that you’re broken. And you’re not inadequate. There’s no such thing. You have a role to play, you have your life, make the best of it. It’s not up. It’s not up to somebody else to decide whether you’re adequate or inadequate. Just know yourself worth and live into your life. Don’t expect things always to be fair. That’s not how life is, you know, sometimes things seem unfair on the on the surface. But really, you will enjoy those experiences. Ultimately, you’ll certainly learn from them. And it’s your life. And you get to choose exactly what you want to do with it.
David Ralph [1:09:19]
And how can our audience connect with you, sir?
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:09:23]
The easiest way, my preferable way would probably be for them to go to their Facebook page, which is Facebook escape the mind trap.com or they can go to the website escaped the mind trap.com. there they’re also completely liberty to friend me on facebook in Maxie Jackson. Follow me on Twitter again in Maxie Jackson. And if they go through any of those routes, they’ll they’ll find me soon enough.
David Ralph [1:09:51]
Ian, thank you so much for spending time with us today joining those dots. And please come back again when you have more dots to join up. Because I do believe that by joining up those dots and connecting our past is the best way to build our futures in Maxie Jackson. Thank you so much.
Ian Maxi Jackson [1:10:06]
Thank you, David.
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you were once to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up Dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.