Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech Joins Us On The Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Podcast
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Introducing Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech is todays guest joining us on the Steve Jobs inspired Join Up Dots business coaching podcast.
He is a lady who can help all of us, who spend the bulk of our days sitting in front of a computer, to throw off the aches and pains that besiege us all.
She admits to having a compulsion to straighten things in life, from the paper clips on her desk, to ensuring that her feet are in alignment with the tiles she is standing on and used to think it was an unhealthy obsession.
But then found out as a Pilates teacher she could utilize all of her straightening skills and help her students get out of pain with better positioning of their bones,
As she says ” I love my job, I’m fascinated with the way the human body moves.”
But her journey to this point, started in quiet a different route, as she originally studied at the University of California where she got a BA in Drama.
How The Dots Joined Up Kristen
She began her career as an actor in Musical Theatre and doing voice over work, so her future could have been jazz hands, and performing.
Which in a funny kind of way it is today, as she performs stretches and leaps in front of classes of eager students, and on her Pilates For Your Life online video course.
Her mission is to help us experience as much joy in our daily lives as possible, and feeling great in our body will help us achieve that too.
So what was it about musical theatre that made her change direction and move into something that she loves?
And was it a struggle to get going and build her online profile, or did things fall into place unexpectedly?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Kristen Luppenlatz Grech such as:
What the difference between fear and excitement is, and how we should be excited to see the fear and tackle it head on.
How she realised that her life was going to change when standing behind a curtain on Broadway watching very unhappy actors and actresses go about their business.
How she looks back to the two car accidents that she suffered and now sees them as a good thing to have happened to her.
Why it is so important to surround ourselves with amazing people who can inspiresus to believe in our own potential greatness.
How we can make the slightest change in the way we sit, stand and breath and make a huge difference to the way we feel.
How To Connect With Kristen Luppenlatz Grech
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Full Transcription Of Kristen Luppenlatz Grech Interview
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:26]
Yes, hello there. Good morning, everybody. I hope it’s a good morning and you haven’t laid in bed and it’s middle of the afternoon before you start listening to Join Up Dots because it’s all about getting you going. Finding that dream life and pushing you’re on to greatness. Now, today’s subject is going to be slightly different because we always talk about the entrepreneurial leap of faith. But today we’re talking about fat, but also to help us entrepreneurs who sit at their computer desk for hour upon hour upon our because today’s guest is a lady who can help all of us who just do that spend all that the bulk of Days sitting in front of the computer to throw up the aches and pains that besiegers all she admits to having a compulsion to straighten things in life. From the paper clips on a desk to ensuring that her feet are in alignment with the towels she’s standing on the ns is a bit weird, and used to think it was an unhealthy obsession. I think she’s right. But then she found out as a polities teacher, she could utilise all of us straightening skills and help her students get out of pain with better positioning of their bones. As she says, I love my job. I’m fascinated with the way the human body moves. But her journey to this point started in quite a different route she originally studied at the University of California where she got a BA in drama. She began her career as an actor in musical theatre and doing voiceover work so that future could have been jazz hands and performing which in a funny kind of way is today as she performs stretches and leaps in front of classes of eager students and on her policies for your life online video course. mission is to help us experience as much joy in our daily lives as possible. And feeling great in our body will help us achieve that too. So what was it about musical theatre that made a change direction and move into something that she loves? And was it a struggle to get going and build an online profile? Or did things fall into place unexpectedly? Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start Join Up Dots with the one and only Kristen Luppenlatz Grech. how are you?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [2:27]
I’m wonderful. Hello, David. Nice to be on your show. I’m so excited.
David Ralph [2:32]
Did you sese a pause at the end there I was I was, Kristen taught me how to say her name and I wrote it phonetically down and when I couldn’t quite see my paper without pulling away from the microphone so so did did
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [2:46]
a fantastic job. Yes, Kristen up and lots grec There
David Ralph [2:50]
we go. We won’t say it again. We’re just call you Chris. Kristen, from Linda.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [2:55]
So rather of noxious name. I know. Well, we know
David Ralph [2:58]
it’s a perfect Scrabble name is If you could get back into Scrabble, you’d win. Oh, yeah, we know hands on there. Yeah, I’ve never
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [3:05]
tried that. But I I’ll take that into consideration for next time I play Scrabble.
David Ralph [3:09]
You do that. So So whereabouts are you talking from at the moment, Kristen.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [3:14]
I’m in Sebastopol, California. I’m on my third floor of my town home. And if you hear a little bit of scratching in the background, that’s my Russian tortoise, who’s scratching in his cage. So I’m up here on the third floor with the computer and the tortoise was a Russian tortoise said he’s about six inches. He’s the sweetest little tortoise and he’s he’s surprisingly fast. You think of a tortoise as being an animal that is moves slowly, but he’s fast. Fast as heck. If you put them out in the garden, he’s gone in a second.
David Ralph [3:52]
To do America. This is a this is a weird segue here but do a wet Americans or call them tortoises because I was in a public Recently in England, and this lady said, Oh, I’m thinking of buying a toy toys. And I said, Nobody calls them toward choices that taught us. She said nobody calls them taught us and I went around the pub saying to strangers, what you know that thing in a shell that you put in a box and it hibernates or winter and they were saying worse now, and I said, you don’t do about what it smells in boxes. And when we worked it out, and literally every single person said it was a tortoise. So is she a freak or is a freak?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [4:30]
Yeah. never heard anyone say anything but tortoise, so I don’t know where she’s from. But I’ve never heard that. So tortoise it is
David Ralph [4:37]
I’m going to record this and send it to her and she’s, she’s got your dress. Yeah, absolutely straight. So it’s not all about tortoises. But but that that’s the nuggets of gold that we start with on this show. You have been on a journey of kind of performing, haven’t you? If we saw co right back in time, which I love to do. The young Kristen, were you Always a sort of energetic girl, Were you the one sort of jumping around energy?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [5:05]
Yes, I was that person. And I think that one of the reasons I was so drawn to performing is that I got to be really fully in my body in my experience of being alive. And I think that’s what I’ve pulled through to the work I do today. And interestingly, now, as we’re doing the joining the dots, I’ve actually started doing theatre again, after a 15 year break of having kids and having a bloody studio. So I did my first quite extraordinary theatre production in San Francisco recently.
David Ralph [5:42]
And what, what, what drew you back?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [5:46]
Well, I think that it’s it’s always been the driving force in my life. And even though I didn’t do a lot of theatre, in my house, we we sing and dance and jump around a lot. Both of my kids are performers and so you I’ve just been doing the mom thing, which is very, you know, satisfying and, and I love my studio. But performing myself is really so soul satisfying for me. And I had an opportunity because my best friend who kind of continued my life in San Francisco, we kind of had a we had a parallel lives we were roommates and both in theatre, and she’s continued on and has become very successful. And I’m so proud of her. And she did a production of a show called mystery irresistible in New York, where she and I had studied years ago in college, and I, I wasn’t able to go to New York and see it, but then they brought it to San Francisco and I had this fantasy that maybe I could audition for it. And it seemed like a ridiculous thing because I have these, you know, two kids and a husband and a business here and it’s was an hour and a Half drive back into San Francisco. But I auditioned. And they cast me. So I got to perform with my best friend in San Francisco in this really amazing show called mystery irresistible and in San Francisco recently, and it was it
David Ralph [7:14]
did you look at each other and kind of wink and think this is a bit strange after all these years where we’re here again?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [7:21]
Oh, yeah, it was. So it was really amazing. Really, really fun. And very challenging. Because I’ve taken a break is
David Ralph [7:31]
a key thing, actually, the challenge I’ve just been having a chat with a guy who says, but basically, he loves the anxiety because he knows that when he lands afterwards, even if he’s so scared, he’s gonna throw up. When he lands. He knows that he has moved on to the next stage of his life. So it’s the challenge actually, you bet. Exciting and you feel the same.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [7:55]
Yes. And I was just speaking about that with my daughter this morning because she He was going up to the the overnight in Fort Ross and she was feeling scared. And I was we were talking about what’s the difference between being scared and excited. And it’s the same thing in theatre. Because you, you have to go on stage. And if you feel like you’re going to throw up you, you’ve got to manage that somehow, and turning that fear into the physicality of excitement rather than perceiving it as fear just perceiving it as excitement, just kind of turning it on its head. And I think absolutely, yeah, for me. That feeling of, of challenge of really kind of fear, to go out on stage in front of people and try not to fall down or try not to forget your lines. It’s can be terrifying, but if you look at it a certain way and see it as a challenge, then it’s excitement, and that’s what makes us feel very alive.
David Ralph [8:57]
I think he really does shop new tools and I, I’m very open with the fact I said on numerous shows, but I really do not know the first word. I’m gonna say when I press record, the theme tune plays and then my mouth starts going and sometimes I’m actually listening to myself thinking you’re talking rubbish, man what what’s coming out of your mouth? And then other times it’s quite good stuff. But I like today. Sorry.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [9:22]
Yeah, yeah, you look good today. I was impressed.
David Ralph [9:25]
Wow, that was just me free flowing. It was just flying from me. But that that ability to actually a channel that it just raises your game, doesn’t it? It raises your game, it gets you thinking gets your blood flowing. I wouldn’t like to record any of these shows. If I wasn’t slightly on edge. I think it would. It would fall flat somehow.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [9:46]
I agree. And I think that’s why I really enjoy listening to your shows, David, because I feel that it’s not you’re not just reading from your notes. You’re You’re really engaged and it’s fresh.
David Ralph [10:01]
What Why do you think so many people Christian don’t build like what we’re talking about they don’t, then then they’re not going to accept the fact that the way to actually create movement in their life is by challenging themselves and putting themselves in that position to be scared. Why do you think so many people see an opposing view, which in my view doesn’t work? Yeah.
Unknown Speaker [10:25]
Well, I mean,
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [10:27]
because you could fail, it could be it could all go wrong. And people like to stay safe with their careers and with their bodies. I see it, you know, segwaying into the movement work that I do. When people get injured. They just sit down, because it’s, there’s more danger. They could they could fall they it could hurt. So it’s a bigger challenge to keep moving and keep pushing through something that’s kind of scary and kind of hurts and it’s the same way with with Life of choosing your career. For me choosing to be an actor, I think was always moving straight into that, that fear, which I found to be so exhilarating. doing theatre and and I just needed I just needed that in my life. So I think once you get started and you feel that rush of, you know, just talking off the cuff and, and flying by the seat of your pants, and then when you have a success, if something goes well, it’s you know, it’s it’s a rush. It’s exciting
David Ralph [11:39]
when it is you can’t go back can you once once you’ve, you’ve had that adrenaline rush once you’ve achieved something, there’s no way that you can go back to be the person that you were before and that’s the that’s the big frustration for me in life. But so many people do not realise but the dreams I had the aspirations all live With themselves by have to get off of that chair go and do something is that movement whether it’s a mental movement or physical movement that starts things happening
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [12:12]
yeah I think it just kind of tilting yourself in that direction can create the momentum you need just a small little step whether it’s moving towards your dreams in your career or your life big dreams in your life or in movement. If you just change the the angle slightly start the weight moving in one direction then you cut your kind of propel yourself and you can get yourself moving that way.
David Ralph [12:41]
So if we went back in time and I met you in a bar with dating with dating in his fantasy Kristen that I’ve got, and I met you, and I said yeah, what what you’re going to be when you get older to the to the point that you are now I’m not going to ask how old you are, but when you get to this point, would you have said before What you’re doing now? Would you have loved the thought of what you’re doing now?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [13:04]
I would have laughed at the thought of what I’m doing now. Because everyone in my family is a teacher. My mom’s a kindergarten teacher, my sisters are teachers. Everybody’s a teacher. And I always thought that was dreadfully boring. And I said, I’ll never be a teacher because I need to be the star. So if I met you, when if we were dating long ago, in a bar, I would have told you that I needed to be a Broadway star. That was that was my aspiration. I was going to be on Broadway. But what I what I found in reality is that being on Broadway is a really hard life. And actually not what I wanted to do. I had some friends who were on Broadway and it was, it’s, it’s kind of brutal, and I found that I didn’t have the personality for it. So I wanted to get all of the all of the the things that I was looking for, in terms of being Broadway, a lot of it being the challenge of performing and being in my body. And I wanted to find all of those things in my life without standing on the streets of New York City at 5am, waiting for an audition. And you know that that fear of, of not knowing if you’d had any stability, and if you you’d ever get another job. And I found all of those things in polities, which I actually found polities, because I was injured, I had some car accidents. But once I started teaching bilities, myself, I realised that I get all of the things that I was looking for, as a performer, by teaching movement, so in a way I’m performing because I’m using my body, I’m using my voice. I’m communicating with people and and I’m actually affecting them emotionally and physically. The way that I hope to do as a performer but I’m just doing it in a different way and actually in a much kind of deeper long term way, hopefully
David Ralph [15:09]
so so if we step back to Broadway because I’m kind of interested about the hustle bustle and the you know the the daily fighting really but you’ve got to do to sort of get yourself into a main row. What what separates the people that make it to the people that don’t? Is it just hustle and perseverance? Is it luck? What What’s your opinion on that?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [15:31]
Well, I don’t know. I have a I have a couple of friends who have continued to pursue that work.
Like my best friend that I just talked about.
I don’t know. I don’t even necessarily think it’s a healthy thing. I think it’s just she’s just got this burning need to to perform. She’s spectacularly talented. And it doesn’t matter what difficulties she has to go through. She pushes through, she doesn’t sleep. She drives for many hours. She goes without money. She’s endlessly giving and she just kind of his her purpose is set. And I think you have to be that tenacious. Did you envy get to that point? Um, I don’t that’s the thing. I was very, I. I realised that that is not what I wanted. I wanted the I wanted the result, but I wasn’t willing to do the kind of work that she does. She works her ass off. And, uh, hi. I live in the country. And I have a really really nice life here.
David Ralph [16:58]
You decided no To go down that route, because it seems to me on the Join Up Dots timeline to be a key for many people that I speak to by work from an early age towards something, and when they get close to it, they decide it’s not what they want. Can you remember how you felt at that time when you suddenly thought hang on all my dreams, all the sort of that the feelings that made me who I am actually have taken me in the wrong direction, and it’s not what I want?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [17:28]
Well, and I think that I don’t think that I had like an abrupt turn. I think that I just realised that I looked at what I was what I was looking for, what what what did I want about being on Broadway, and I found another way to, to get that and actually, what I did is I started doing voiceover work. So I lived in San Francisco, and I started doing voiceover work, which somehow just was a little bit gentler. And I still got to do theatre, but I wasn’t pushing towards You know, the big Broadway thing I was I was living a happy little life in San Francisco doing some voiceover doing some theatre, and I got a part time corporate job.
David Ralph [18:11]
But that’s a funny decision, isn’t it because, you know, someone to jump in. But so many of our listeners are out there. And they’ve created a path for themselves. And they don’t want to don’t want to end up with egg on their face. They don’t want their friends and their family to go. This is what you said you wanted, you know, why you changing direction. So the fact that you were aware enough to realise in your heart of hearts is not what you wanted, was a brave decision, or was it just you just knew in you? It wasn’t a brave decision because it was the only decision.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [18:46]
Well, and I what I remember, I remember the moment I was actually backstage at a Stephen Sondheim musical, actually into the woods which has now been made into a movie Me and my friend who I went to college with who was kind of my competition for all the big roles, although she was tall and thin and blonde and gorgeous and I was brunette and not talented. So she got she got a lot of the roles that I would have liked, but I went to visit her and she had achieved my pinnacle of success. She was on stage with Bernadette Peters. She was in Stephen Sondheim’s show on Broadway, which was my, you know, that would have been the pinnacle of, of my life. And I was sitting backstage with her I saw I saw the show and it was fantastic. And I went backstage, and I was talking to her and some of the other actors. And what I realised is they were all unhappy. They were all griping about the the rent, and the commute. And they were they were thinking about their next thing. They all were looking for They were like working on albums and stuff. And I saw that they were not satisfied with what I thought was the pinnacle of life.
And that was the moment when I thought, wow. So you know, you, you, you work your ass off to get where you think you’re going, and then you’re there still somewhere else you want to go. So I realised that these people were they didn’t even feel satisfied with being on Broadway with, you know, that they’re always looking for the next thing they were, they were dissatisfied, they were grumpy and unhappy, which totally blew my mind.
David Ralph [20:35]
It’s a human trait bow isn’t it? We we see it time and time again that the the manager who’s got a lovely house and the flash cars and the kids and the gorgeous wife and all that kind of stuff ends up ultimately being as unhappy as the person who are probably unhappier than the person who is living in a couple books, no money and just sort of surviving day by day. Maybe
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [21:00]
Yeah, I think it’s the striving for the next thing that that’s important. You know,
David Ralph [21:07]
I think you see, I think it’s if you set expectations, and you don’t meet them, no matter how well you’ve done, you beat yourself up, and you shouldn’t cheat you. And this goes out to all the listeners out there, I’m sure you’ve got dreams, you’ve got aspiration. I’m sure you’ve got plans that you’re working towards. But you should always accept where you are. And if you think to yourself, actually, I can crank it up a bit, and I can make more momentum in my life to get forward, then that’s great. But you can’t beat yourself up that you’re comparing against somebody else or what other people are doing because they want a different timeline than you It could be that they started five years earlier. It could be that they had you know, natural talent that you’re striving to gain it could be numerous different things. But is that expectation that is the killer I feel? Yeah.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [21:59]
Yeah. I think for for me, I realised that I didn’t want to be any once I saw it once I like saw behind the curtain. I realised that I didn’t want to be that person. I didn’t want to be that dissatisfied person on Broadway.
David Ralph [22:18]
You never want to see behind the curtain do yeah, that’s what happened in The Wizard of
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [22:21]
Oz. That’s right. That’s right. It can be it can be terrifying to see behind the curtain
David Ralph [22:30]
so so what what How did you decide Actually, I’m gonna play some words I’m gonna throw these in earlier than I know me too. But we’re going to be looking at your next step. This is Oprah Winfrey.
Oprah Winfrey [22:40]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself what is the next right move? not think about Oh, I got all of this stuff. What is the next right move? And then from that space, make the next right move and the next right move and not to be overwhelmed. Buy it because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment, you know, you’re not defined by what somebody says is a failure for you, because failure is just there to point you in a different direction.
David Ralph [23:12]
So you’re behind that curtain. You’ve decided that you want to change direction. How did you make your next move?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [23:21]
Well, I’m I’m kind of embarrassed to say that I kind of followed people around.
David Ralph [23:27]
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [23:29]
Well, like followed my boyfriend around my, my boyfriend was going to UCLA. And so I just kind of hung around and waited for him to graduate. And then once he did, he told me that he didn’t want me around, really. So that was a that was a big blow. And at that point, I moved up to Northern California where that best round that I’m talking about was so I just kind of partly I, one of my one of the things that I think has been very successful. Successful about my life as I pick amazing people to, to connect with. And I kind of follow him around. So I, I saw her life up here in Northern California. And I moved up here, and we were roommates. And I started finding ways to perform in Northern California. And of course, you know, there’s always the challenge of making enough money as a performer. So I lucked into getting a really good corporate part time corporate job, which allowed me to have the kind of luxurious life in the theatre that I had, which doesn’t really pay much money. Even the voiceover work even when I had a couple good jobs, it wasn’t enough to, you know, always pay the rent. So I worked for Oracle Corporation part time and that was that was a great job. So I don’t know I just kind of wandered off from one thing to the next and
David Ralph [25:03]
but you didn’t, did you because the goal that I got from that was you surrounded yourself with amazing people. And that is the is the Jim Rohn quote, isn’t it you we are the average of the five people that we surround ourselves. So if you find the best, most talented people, it rubs off on you and it helps you and if you surround yourself with a bunch of old misery guts, you’re gonna do the same as well.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [25:28]
Yeah, that’s true. If you look at, if you look out into the world and see who’s doing what you’d like to be doing, who’s living in the kind of life that you’d like to be living it, watch what they do where they are, and if you can rub shoulders with them, and emulate them a bit. That’s great. So that’s that’s always been my, my secret.
David Ralph [25:50]
So so let’s move on a little bit because obviously you’ve ended up being the polarities lady and you’re doing great things and you’re loving it.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [25:58]
Now. I am loving it.
David Ralph [25:59]
Wait Yeah, I can hear you laughing. And when you look back to those two car accidents that you had, which obviously anyone who was in a car accident is a terrible time to go through. And there’s also ramifications and different things. Do you actually look back on bows? in a strange way now and go thank God for them. That sort of helped me on my way, someone.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [26:20]
Absolutely. And I see that happen a lot with the people that I work with who have injuries. For me. Being an actor in San Francisco, I was at a point where I was a little bit frantic. I was working at Oracle Corporation. About 20 minutes down the peninsula from San Francisco. So I was driving back and forth there and then I was doing auditions all over San Francisco. And I was a little bit frantic. I was running around like a lunatic. And the car accidents both happened. Neither one of them were my fault, but I was kind of running around frantically. So I was Probably driving frantically too. So I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. One accident was when a woman on the freeway kind of started hydroplaning. And the other one was a taxi, who was jumping of light hit me. But what those although it was a very, very difficult time for me to go through that kind of pain. I realised it kind of brought me to a dead stop and made me look at that franticness of my life. And that started a period of my life where I did a lot of I did a lot of therapy. And I was actually in a 12 step programme for a while. And I really took a hard look at my life. And in fact that time when I look back now, that was a that was a difficult time. I wasn’t as joyful as I am now. But I had to get through that hard time. I had to take a deep look. At some of the things that weren’t going well for me, and kind of do some hard, hard stuff.
David Ralph [28:11]
I’ve never been through a 12 step programme. I’ve never been proof therapy. So I don’t actually understand how deep they go. But as it’s happening, are you aware that you need it? Or is it something but you are just clinging to because you’ve got no other route?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [28:28]
Well, you know what, it’s funny because the work that I do now is much more physical. And when I do kind of therapeutic work now, it’s much more somatic or in my body, which I think can have a lot of the same benefits. So I don’t do a lot of talk therapy anymore. I feel like if I’m, if I’m really good in my body, then that stuff works itself out. But there was some stuff that I needed to talk about and and take a really hard look at just a moment. I think I was a little bit too.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [29:05]
I think I was a little delusional, actually, in terms of, you know, happily ever after. And I think that I needed to just kind of come to terms with some of the things that weren’t working out well in my life and
and make some better decisions.
David Ralph [29:24]
Isn’t that just you fo the happy ever after because my my, my wife who I’m married to now and I’ve been married to for years. Before we got together, I was going out with some other girls. And she said to me, you’re never going to settle down. You’re waiting for the film lover to come along. You’re, you’re waiting for Meg Ryan. Well, Meg Ryan before she’s done weird stuff to herself. But, but the nice Meg Ryan to sort of come along in the 80s. And I said to her now, it’s not true. It’s not true. And she’s right. And now she’s my wife and we’ve been married to get nearly 25 years. Whatever. But oh,
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [30:01]
David Ralph [30:02]
thank you very much is that just all of us that that happy ever after thing kind of you, you become wise and you become more real as you get older?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [30:13]
Yeah, I think so.
And also maybe, you know, being I think there’s a balance between the kind of, you know, we talked about that feeling of challenge and excitement. And I think you can go a little bit overboard there and not be as realistic as some of the people who aren’t taking the challenges. Maybe they’re more realistic. So finding, finding that balance between the big challenges and the happy ever after and believing in big dreams. And then you know, some of the practical stuff you need that too.
David Ralph [30:48]
I think that easy. Yeah, I think that is the balance isn’t having too big drain, wanting the vision but is almost so out there. You can’t imagine how to do it, but then breaking it down. into the very practical steps, but get you moving towards it. I think that’s the difference isn’t if you aren’t just dreaming the big dreams main you end up with nothing.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [31:10]
Exactly. Yeah, that’s a hard reality sometimes. Yeah, but I’m usually just
David Ralph [31:16]
realism once again, isn’t it realism and all the people that are listening to this show? They’re wise they’re clever people and they know that a dream is a dream until you start moving towards it and doing stuff to make it happen.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [31:32]
Yeah. Yeah, that’s true. It doesn’t come true unless you put the work in.
David Ralph [31:39]
What What would be your dream now then and we’re going to step back in time again, because I’m interested in sort of the younger you but at the moment, being in the position now that you love your job as you say, and you’re so happy with it. Is this the dream or have you don’t bigger dreams deal?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [31:58]
Well, I do think this is The dream and actually the big dream is to have people feel more joyful in their body. Because I think that we’ve lost so much of the natural movement of our that our bodies were designed for, because of kind of the luxury of furniture and and our luxurious lifestyles when we don’t have to wash the clothes at the Riverside and we don’t have to walk four miles to get the water and we don’t have to toil in the fields to grow our own our own food. Everything comes to us pretty easily. So we’ve lost a lot of that natural movement that is healthy for our bodies. We don’t squat much anymore. We don’t climb we don’t hang and our bodies need that kind of movement to feel good.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [32:55]
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [32:57]
especially in our in the workplace. Where and because I worked at Oracle Corporation for eight years, and I saw how people sit for sometimes 12 hours a day they don’t even go to the bathroom. And in probably the worst position for your body in that 90 degree angles. Supported pelvis is just disaster for your body
David Ralph [33:25]
goes into 21 i have a bag fitted out like oh, no,
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [33:29]
it’s it’s true. I remember the people were just driven somehow to keep working. Even when there’s they should have been sensible enough to know that they needed to walk around they needed some fresh air they needed to use the restroom regular they need to stretch they need to,
David Ralph [33:50]
but we know oh we would not Yeah, I’m a when I started this this job here and I was creating a show. I used to do stupid hours. Absolutely, it was almost like 22 hours a day to get it going. And it was just constant, constant constant. And I, I think to myself into the ground, I look back on it, and I think what the hell was I doing? But I look back on it. And I think, my God, I can do more than I’ve ever given myself credit that I could do. I had perseverance, I had insurance, and I could push myself further. Even when I was in the City of London working. I’ve never worked those kind of hours before. But now I’m very aware, just before interviewing yourself, I was standing up and stretching and trying to touch the ceiling and just doing things like that because I know that I’ve got to find a natural way of bringing some kind of element of stretchiness into my life because otherwise you are at your desk all the time. But yeah, it is difficult in an office, isn’t it in the office, unless everyone is getting up and stretching and doing all those. You’re gonna look like a lunatic.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [34:58]
That’s my big dream. That’s my big dream so that it doesn’t feel awkward to move. Because when you see more and more, they’re there standup desks and all kinds of interesting you can sit on a ball and you can do various things. But it still feels a little bit embarrassing to you know, stand up and stretch or some such thing, roll down the wall or some of the the movements that that I recommend while you’re sitting at your chair, pelvic movement and, and ribcage, movement and stuff. But what I what I really want people to understand is that all of those movements give you more energy, make your body function better and therefore your your, your work is better. Your mind is sharper, you get more done. And so hopefully when when the corporations or what whoever’s paying you to sit at the desk realise that that kind of movement that kind of takes Appropriate breaks and stretching actually helps get more work done. I think that that’ll change the culture a little bit.
David Ralph [36:09]
How long do you need to do it for it? Would what a five minute burst be good enough? Or do you need to do 15 minutes?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [36:18]
Well, I think the idea is that you don’t get stuck in any one position. And what I like to teach people is to become aware of their pattern, so that you are continually moving away from dropping down into your pattern being being pulled back into the earth by gravity, and you’re continually lifting up and stretching your spine up and kind of floating on the space between your bones rather than dropping down into your bones. So everybody’s got a pattern. Some of us curl behind our tail and our pelvis and drop down into a collapsed position. Some people slide rib cage forward and prop themselves up by their elbows. People have various ways of putting more weight on one side of their pelvis or the other ways of one leg crossing over the other that feels comfortable, but ultimately isn’t doing good stuff for their joints. So becoming aware of the way your body kind of drops down against gravity. And then just continually lifting up in opposition, whether it’s doing a five minute burst, or moments during your day, so that you’re continually being aware of your body rather than just being in your mind so that you’re incorporating the better movement in your joints as you’re working and it doesn’t have to be letting go of the work that you’re doing, to move, but it’s a continual re enter Internal lift. That makes sense.
David Ralph [38:06]
No, it does. As she was talking, I was thinking about myself. And when I sit and I record, I’m a, I’m in a very straight up white position. My rest is where my feet are flat on the floor. But I catch myself as I’m standing there in the kitchen making a cup of coffee, and you catch your reflection in that sort of the window that’s gone dark outside. Yeah, I suddenly think, Oh, I’m slow slouching now and I put my shoulders up and then I two minutes later, I look at myself, Oh, I’m gone again. So is it something that you can just not truly develop until it becomes natural or do you keep having to go hang up? I’m doing it again. I’m doing it again.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [38:43]
Well, I’ve been working on this for over 20 years, and I’ve been a police teacher for 14 and I’ve been working on my pattern. But and I do get I do see progress and the moon beautiful thing is that I’m not in pain anymore and I used to be in chronic pain every day with with loss of sensation and my feet and hands and and kind of a knife stab feeling between my shoulder blades and was it yeah and bad postural choices and falling on my head a lot when I was a kid so everything leads up to it but I don’t have any pain anymore and my but i’m i’m actually 52 and my body works better than it ever has before. I just went skiing the other day and I ski better than I ever did. And I used to be a pretty darn good skier I used to ski every day, but because of the way I use my body on a daily basis, I feel able to use my body every bit as well as I did when I was young and even better because I have more wisdom and I understand the way my body moves now.
David Ralph [39:57]
Cuz I went on Facebook and I said, Why is it about knees and the inability to put your socks on once you hit 40? Because I, when I sit on the side of the bed, my wife goes, You sound like you’re having a heart attack, and I’m doing all that kind of stuff. And this, this woman replied, just one word, yoga. And that’s what she said, you know, if you do yoga, and you do stretching and all that kind of stuff, you won’t have these issues. But I suppose I’m coming back to the same thing again, it’s difficult, isn’t it to fit it into your life, it’s very difficult to find a way of making it part of your normal activity without it becoming another activity to do.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [40:38]
Right. So the the answer of the putting on your socks question is the differentiation of your pelvis and your leg. Because as we sit, we start moving the pelvis in the leg as one unit, rather than two separate bony structures that glide one upon the other. And yeah, yoga gives you that that long opportunity to luxuriate in the stretch. But what polities does is it gives you the stability around the pelvis so that the leg bone can move separately from the pelvis. And so that when you’re putting on your sock, your pelvis stays still as your knee floats up to put your sock on. Otherwise, if it’s all kind of stuck together, it’s much more difficult. So polities is what is is the stability and the flexibility. And yoga and polities are good, complementary workout. So that’s not that one is better than the other. But polities focuses on the stability of the spine, and the deep muscles around the spine so that the limbs can can move with ease. And what I do is I take those kinds of all the polities exercises and I take ingredients of them and put them into everyday activities like sitting at your desk or I have a polities in the kitchen. Video to where you you just notice, like for me, I curl my tail under and I drop my pelvis forward and my shoulders, you know, collapse down. So as I’m doing the things that I do in the kitchen, I’m continually bringing awareness to that lifted feeling again and untucking my tail and softening my knees, and breathing and kind of taking all of the work that goes into doing polities, and just taking little bits of it so that it’s like doing a great big, long polities class throughout your day rather than run into the gym. furiously doing your one hour of exercise and then going back to slumping at your computer or sitting on your couch watching TV, but actually using that invigorating movement that you do either in politics or any other kind of work that you do to make your body feel good and then incorporating it into your everyday life.
David Ralph [43:00]
So So before we play the the theme of the show the Steve Jobs speech I like to play on here. Yeah, let’s Is it possible to give the listeners for all US cubicle dwellers and people sitting on the trains and stuff? Is there an exercise that we can do subtly without people looking around at us?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [43:18]
I think just recognising where your pelvis sits, is can be very helpful. Like you said, you have this straight support of your, your chair behind you, if you can move slightly forward off that back or even if you’re sitting in a vehicle or you know on the on the train or something and, and bring your pelvis right underneath your rib cage is if your pelvis were a bowl and your rib cage were an upside down bowl or I like to call it a bell, kind of hanging and balancing right over the pelvis. And just noticing if your knees fall open or if they fall together. Try to get the hip bones and the knees in line with your second toe.
David Ralph [44:06]
Knees always bow open. That’s natural man position, isn’t it?
Kristen Luppenlatz Grech [44:11]
Well, often it’s because they don’t have a lot of activation of their inner thighs is what I find pulls out.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [44:21]
We tend to become stronger in our abductors, the outside of our legs and less strong in the inner legs. So yeah, the the knees can be slightly open, but you don’t want to have them just collapse and you want to be standing into your feet and a little bit active so that your hips and your knees and your second toe are in line. And then you want to lift up through the crown of the head as if you were pushing the ceiling away. And the first thing to do is just to to become aware of your breath pattern and breathe into your back inside ribs like an accordion. breathing in through your nose. Filling upside decide and then exhaling fully to let the rib cage drop down and all the air to come out of the lungs. Often we don’t ever fully exhale. We think about taking a deep breath in, but getting that full exhale is really important. I’m doing
David Ralph [45:17]
that Oh, and I feel slightly dizzy.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [45:20]
Yeah, don’t overdo it.
David Ralph [45:22]
I’m gonna pass out here, Christine, you’re gonna have to finish up the show.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [45:26]
Don’t pass out. So start slow. But as as you get used to using the full capacity of your capacity of your lungs, you’ll have less of that sensation. And then now as you exhale, you want to curl just behind your sit bones. So you’re pulling your belly in and kind of up on your exhale. And then as you inhale, you rock slightly forward in front of your sit bones. And then you exhale behind. So it can be very, very special. People wouldn’t even notice. If you’re just shifting behind your sit bones. And in front of your sit bones, you can get some deep internal work happening there.
David Ralph [46:09]
You could you could do that on the train next to someone and they wouldn’t have a clue, would you?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [46:13]
Absolutely, yeah. And that’s getting your pelvic floor working, which is the hammock of muscles in your pelvis, which you can activate without anybody seeing and that’s important for men and women. Now, women were taught to do keigo exercises, but that, that that muscle in the pelvis is really important. And it connects up to the muscles of the diaphragm and the, the muscles that we breathe with and all of the spinal muscles that lift up our spine. It’s a lot of stuff in there that we kind of turn off because we overuse the outside body. So if you can kind of just kind of get some deep work from the inner thighs to the deep, pelvic floor and the deep abdominals and magine all of the little muscles that lift your spine up, then your head can kind of float rep right up on top of your spine. And you may notice that you’ve got some tension in your shoulders, your head is forward of your centre. And at first, it’s going to feel fatiguing. to continually lift yourself back up like that and use your deepest muscles and your, your body will probably drop back into its original pattern over and over. But the more you do that, the more those deep muscles will become accustomed to lifting you up and the outside muscles then can relax. So those hip flexors, the muscles in your hips that tend to become gripped, and your shoulders especially, we tend to put our shoulders up around our ears. So as you get more deeply engaged around your spine, your shoulders can soften and drop down.
David Ralph [47:50]
I’m going to do this I’m going to do this on a daily basis and I’m going to report back to you I’m gonna tell you how, because I won’t share it on air here. Our hell I’m going to share it on I have a, I have a pain in my right leg constantly. And when I go to bed at night, sometimes my knee wakes me up, not sort of David, David, it’s time to get up. But it’s just a pain and I literally had to stretch it out and it cracks and when I’m away again for the rest of the night, and that’s all down the right hand side from the hip down to the knees. So that is, but I’m sitting in a dodgy position, or I’m not quite doing this pelvis business.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [48:26]
Well, and that’s the work that I do with my clients on a daily basis. And I find amazing transformations when people just become aware of their patterns. And what happens is so many I bet there’s a lot of people listening to your show going, I have that pain to or as a variation of that pain, especially since we sit so much. There’s the sciatic nerve that goes down from the from the pelvis to the down the leg and we can get congested in there. And what I think is that pain is Your body signalling to you that there’s something out of alignment that there’s something wrong. And if you can pay attention to that and not just think, you know, damn, my body isn’t working the way it should, but listen to it and try to find places where that pain diminishes perhaps putting a little bit more activation on your left side so that your right side can be a little bit freer.
David Ralph [49:27]
I’m gonna report back again I’m gonna be a totally new man I am I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the fittest man in podcasting.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [49:35]
David Ralph [49:37]
20 shows a day I’m gonna if I haven’t passed out in the second one for me breathing. So so just before, just before I do bring Steve Jobs on. What what what was that madness that I laughed at in the introduction? Well actually asked nigut about you had to make your feet in alignment with the towels you were standing on. Well, what was all about?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [49:58]
That’s just my You know, obsessive compulsive disorder, I believe. I know, you know, I never really realised that my the way I saw the world was strange. Until one day I was sitting at my friend’s house, I was probably 10 years old. I was sitting in a chair, and I had my, my elbows on the armrest of the chair and I had my hands up kind of like Cobras. And I was moving my fingertips around the room, like imagining lines shooting out of my fingertips and aligning my hands with things around the room. And somebody looked at me and said, What are you doing? And I realised at that moment that that was strange. And it’s just the way my brain works. I see Connect, connected lines between everything to the point of compulsion earlier in my life. Where I I still, I still line up my feet and I line up I’m one of those people that my desk is all lined up perfectly in my you know, I’m endlessly I just in fact, as we were talking my cup is here. Perfectly neatly at the corner of the desk, and the keyboard is exactly aligned and my pen is aligned. So it’s just the way my brain I feel comfortable with things being very aligned.
David Ralph [51:10]
I know I sneak it, and I shouldn’t sneak up because I’m a professional host. But hey, it’s my it’s my show so I can sneak or if I want to, but seeing the lines is is Yeah, probably your talent because you see lines through people’s bodies, don’t you? you align us so that we can function. So this was like, Yes, this was the one you’re buying now.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [51:33]
Yeah. So it’s so satisfying now, to realise that it that I can use that. My ability to see lines, and I can help people feel better just by shifting their body weight, an inch to the left things. All the forces on their bones changes and they may get out of pain. It happened just the other day a woman who’s I knew Her 12 years ago because we had our babies at the same time and my son is 12. And she was going through all this terrible back pain and she had back surgery. And at the time, I was kind of a new police teacher, I wasn’t confident enough to say, Please don’t get surgery until you’ve, you know, gone through a little bit more exploration of non surgical procedure. And and now she’s she had back surgery 12 years ago. And now 12 years later, she’s come to my bloody studio and she’s in a lot of pain, because surgery can only do so much and you’re you’re left with your patterns after the surgery. And the things that led you to having that injury often remain even though you’ve had a surgical procedure. So I did a postural assessment, and I noticed that her right leg was externally rotated. And we did a little bit of just awareness work at from the standing point, and I had her shift her foot so it was pointed forward. Word and she felt different muscles activate all the way up her leg and into her hip. And we just worked together for an hour. And then I saw her a week later and she said, I can’t believe how much of an impact just moving my foot has, has had, I don’t feel the pain in my back anymore. So there’s more work for us to do in terms of getting all of the the muscles activated. But just noticing how you kind of use your bones to prop you up and how it doesn’t do you any good. And just shifting her foot and allowing some some muscles that weren’t being activated to feel to allow her to feel more stable in new places, allowed her back to relax in ways that it wasn’t relaxed before.
David Ralph [53:53]
That make sense. It makes it makes total sense. It makes total sense. So I tell you what, I’m not gonna play the Steve Jobs female I’m just fascinated to ask the question, we know what he says we play on a daily basis. When you look back, can you join up your dots now? Can you see the path that you’re on?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [54:12]
I can, I can very powerfully. And I think what I would go back and tell my younger self is to trust, the journey to trust that going toward my dreams and going toward what made me feel lit up and passionate, would lead me somewhere. That was perfect. And there were so many times along the way when I didn’t trust it. And I was fearful. And looking back, even though even the challenging things led me where I am today, even the car accidents gave me the kind of deep understanding that allows me to help other people now if I hadn’t gone through that, I wouldn’t know it so deeply and I wouldn’t have the kind of empathy That I need to really understand how to help people.
David Ralph [55:06]
Well, let’s give you a chance to have a one on one with your younger self, because this is the end of the show. And this is when I send you back in time to have a one on one. And if you could choose a younger Kristen, what age do you choose and what advice would you give when I’m gonna play the theme to now and when he grew up, this is a sermon on the mic.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [55:49]
All right, Kristin. Young Kristen. so wonderful to get this opportunity to talk to you this way. You are a person who is driven by passion, and, and excited about life, and highly imaginative and creative, and you have big dreams. And now it seems like life is kind of crushing your dreams because everybody wants you to be responsible and make money and, and things that don’t feel fun.
But what I want to tell you is that you can find the balance. You can continue to go toward those things that are fun and and and you feel passionate about and you can add in a little bit of responsibility. And you can find a balance that makes you feel satisfied and excited about going forward. And when you’re old Like me, you’ll look back at your life. And you’ll recognise that the hardships were just curves in the road that continued to lead you to a place where you can enjoy your life, be of service to other people, which you don’t realise now is is more important than you think. And you can feel deeply satisfied with your work while you make money and get your butt in gear, doing the things that are important for creating a business and still incorporate all of the fun things that you love today so you don’t have to choose. You do have to work hard. You do have to be realistic. But you can you don’t have to fight the two sides of your yourself, you will find a way to incorporate the joy of movement and being in your body and communicating with other people with smart business practices. And being tenacious and being a smart businessperson. Don’t lose heart because life gets better and better and better as you age, in my opinion in your body and in your you know, your experiences, your wisdom, and your ability to just allow life to feel fantastic.
David Ralph [58:42]
How can our audience connect with you, Kristen?
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [58:45]
Well, I have a website called polities home practice. And it’s just www dot polities p i la te es home, practice calm
David Ralph [59:00]
We’ll have over links on the show notes. And thank you so much for spending time with us today joining those dots. And please come back again, when you have more dots to join up, because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the best way to build our futures. Kristen, thank you so much.
Kristen Iuppenlatz Grech [59:15]
Thank you, David. This was so much fun. I really really enjoyed talking to you.
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you are wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.