Welcome to the Steve Jobs based Join Up Dots Podcast Interview with Michelle Patterson
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Introducing Michelle Patterson
Michelle Patterson is today’s guest joining us on the Join Up Dots podcast.
She is a lady who believes totally in the mission that she started back in, well actually it seems like something that has been in her since a small girl.
She is driven by the belief that everyone has something significant to contribute and when people (male or female) come together and support one another; “We are truly Better Together.”
She is committed to helping individuals discover their talent and connect to the right circle of people to live out their purpose.
And that really is a key point to building success in ones life.
Surround yourself with the right people who can complement your own strengths, and make your best even better.
Setting her career out on firm foundations she left Loyola Marymount University wth a BA in Business/Political Science and started working for Accountants Overload as an account executive.
How The Dots Joined Up For Michelle
She then moved onto Robert Half International and did ten years, before becoming an Area Manager and Trainer for New Century Mortgage.
And what is most impressive is due to her outlook, and positive disposition she appears to have built on the connections that she gained at these companies, and instead of simply walking away from them, built upon them.
The no experience wasted theory, working hand in hand with no personal relationship should be wasted either.
Now she has many plates spinning at one time, with commentator, author, public speaker, and President of several global networks, as well as being a mother and wife of her beloved husband Eric all on her schedule.
So how has she done all this and still look like she is in her early twenties?
And does she see networking, and building connections as the major piece of the puzzle that people miss out on for fear of not having anything to offer?
Well let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots, with the one and only Michelle Patterson.
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Michelle Patterson such as:
How she remembers being a twelve year girl, and getting the opportunity to interview the Governor of a huge Californian network and thinking “He really appreciated me!”.
How when she gets home after a days work she is so energised by the days work, that she feels that she could run a marathon. That is when you know that your passion is in full swing.
How she recalled arranging a conference and finding out that she was $2,000,000 short of what she needed. And knew in her heart what decision she should take next.
How we are now able to build, create and inspire on a global scale like nothing seen before, which means the future is purely down to the decisions we make for ourselves.
Why one of the most powerful things you can do everyday is simply “Show up”….even when things are really tough, showing up is the way forward.
How To Connect With Michelle Patterson
Or if you prefer just pop over to our podcast archive for thousands of amazing episodes to choose from.
Full Transcription Of Michelle Patterson Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
Today’s show is brought to you by podcast is mastery.com. The premier online community teaching you to podcast like a pro. Check us out now at podcasters mastery.com.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:38]
Yes, hello there everybody and welcome to a Join Up Dots with David Ralph from the United Kingdom. This is Episode 325. And this is one of those kind of episodes, but I suppose leans towards a certain theme but in pure Join Up Dots style. We will be going way back in time to find out how the lady has has got to the success level that she has today, because it’s quite simply that this is a lady who believes totally in the mission that she started back in. Well, actually, it seems like someone has been in essence a small girl. She’s driven by the belief that everyone has something significant to contribute. And when people male or female come together and support one another, we’re truly better together. She’s committed to helping individuals discover their talent and connect to the right circle of people to live out their purpose, and that really is a key point to building success in one’s life. Surround yourself with the right people who can complement your own strengths and make your best even better. Now setting her career on firm foundations. She left University with a BA in business political science and started working for accountants overlord as an account executive. She then moved on to Robert Half international and did 10 years before becoming an area manager and trainer for new century mortgage. And what is most impressive is due to her outlook and positive disposition. She appears to have built on the connections that she’s gained. These companies, and instead of simply walking away from them, build upon them time and time again. But no experience wasted very working hand in hand with no personal relationship should be wasted either. Now she has many plates spinning at one time with commentator, author, public speaker and president of several global networks as well as being a mother and wife of a beloved husband, Eric on her schedule. So how has she done all this and still look like she’s in her early 20s? And does she see networking and building connections as the major piece of the puzzle, but people miss out on on fear of not having anything to offer? Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Michelle Patterson. How are you Michelle?
Michelle Patterson [2:42]
Hello, David, how are you?
David Ralph [2:44]
I’m extremely well, extremely well. What was happening in your life because you’re busy lady you you’ve been on another show. You’ve been cheating on me. You jumped on another show just before this
Michelle Patterson [2:55]
stage so no, I I could listen to you talk all day. I love I love your accent my my sister married a Brit, and all their kids all speak. You know, it’s Hello on to you and Cheerio. So I love listening to you.
David Ralph [3:11]
We’re very old school is like Downton Abbey where we live every single day. He’s like Hugh Grant and Downton Abbey. That’s the only connection that we have to language.
Michelle Patterson [3:22]
Well, I’ve been I’ve been busy, but you know, I’m having the time of my life right now. I really feel like all the different jobs that I’ve done, it’s really prepared me to get to this point. What we’re doing with women network, we’re creating the largest community for women globally. And it’s amazing what happens when you bring thought leaders and just talented individuals together men and women together. I mean, they truly create magic and it’s it’s it’s exciting. It really, really is exciting. So
David Ralph [3:59]
all you one of those rare breeds that can really firmly say, and I know you sort just mentioned it, but you actually do love your life at the moment.
Michelle Patterson [4:08]
You know, I, I’m one of those people, I mean, I definitely have those days where, you know, it’s, you struggle, you have rough days, you have good days, but I’m one of those individuals that I feel like we own it, you know, we truly have the ability to create the life that we want. I talked a lot about to the women that I work with, it’s creating your best life blueprint. And and once we own it, you know, once we can decide, you know, versus letting someone else decide what path we should go on. But once we decide what we want to manifest mean that that’s when it gets fun, that’s when it gets exciting. And you know, and I expect I mean, I want to be in love. You know, my husband, I were we’ve been married 19 years and we work at it, but I, you know, I want to have this loving release. ship. And so it’s putting a focus on that. And those relationships, you know, I want to have a brilliant career, and I want to challenge myself and I want to push myself and I want to be serving a bigger purpose. And so it’s really being able to go ahead and take a step back and look at those variables. And we did with my California women’s conference, we worked with Gallup poll, and they did 50 years of study and they showed, you know, what leads to your best life, you know, who are the people out there that are having, you know, their, their happiest, you know, life? And what does that look like? And what they did was they came up with these five areas, and it was career, physical, financial, social, and community. And what they said was, you know, if you are playing all five of those areas, and you’re focused on all five of those areas, and obviously, not all At the same level all the time, but that’s when you have your best life. And so what we started doing, and I do it as well is being able to take a step back and saying, you know, what I want to have happen, you know, what is it that I want to create? And and then I go after it. And so I only have myself to blame if if I’m not in the situation I want to be in. Well, then that is a key
David Ralph [6:24]
thing. Sorry to jump in. But that is a key thing, isn’t it? You have only got yourself to blame. And I think most people in life and I’ll put my hands up for this will spend a certain proportion of their life almost waiting for things to be given to them. They’re waiting for that promotion, they’re waiting for that raise. And if I don’t get it, they feel slighted. Why didn’t I get that? But of course, if you’re more proactive and you go after it, and you do everything you possibly can, more often than not, you will get it and if you don’t, as you say it’s down to you. What did I do wrong, Ben? How can I improve how can I get what I want next doing
Michelle Patterson [7:01]
and what I’m finding is that that most people they want to help most people want to get behind you and and support you and what happens is that we we don’t share what our passions are we don’t share what we need help with know we show up and we’ve come across as having everything completely together and you know we weren’t made that way we weren’t made to have all the skill sets what were we made to do is collectively come together and you know, I have a gift you have a gift you know, our friend has given how do we come together and and that’s when the magic happens. So So
David Ralph [7:42]
how do the listeners get that defo for the listeners out there and they’re listening to us and I I know I’m doing is what I should be doing. You obviously sound like you know what you’re doing. But so many people are listening to these shows day after day after day because they’re just waiting for that the Also the waiting for that key that will unlock the door How did you do it? How did you find out that you were doing what you should be doing and knowing what strengths you should be playing for
Michelle Patterson [8:12]
you know, I mean I’m I’m gonna be 45 so it it it takes time I think what happens is that you know, we think that it’s this easy thing to create but it really is. I think one of life’s lessons is you know your your happiness and you’re living on purpose when you are truly being of service and you’re giving back and you know that old saying it’s the it’s really the people that are that are receiving this the people that are giving that are truly experiencing that happiness and you know, for me it was you know, playing a big game and and not running away from it. You know, I I ran into some really big challenges where I question you know, why plugin My even in this space, what am I doing? You know, I took on a huge conference that, you know, it’s the largest longest running conference in the United States. And Had I known what I was getting into, I probably would have ran the other way.
Unknown Speaker [9:17]
So what I do know I got what
David Ralph [9:18]
Michelle Patterson [9:20]
bosey for me, it was, um, you know, and I think that what happens is we go on this journey, you know, that starts with us it early or the early age, and I think that all the different jobs we have, it just continuously prepares us for that next job, and that next life experience. And for me, you know, my my initial kind of interaction with with doing this conference was when I was 12 years old. You know, I interviewed the governor who started the California women’s conference. So again, this is the largest longest conference in the US now is gone. Global. I had the opportunity the same year. So you can imagine this David the same year that was started. I interviewed him for the eighth grade school paper. So I’m asking them, you know, very profound questions. What’s your favourite pastime? How many kids do you have? You know, very political, earth shattering questions. And this man, you know, responds, the governor responds and says, you know, that was the best interview, you know, I’ve ever heard. And I can remember, you know, at 12 years old, super shy kid. And it was the first time that somebody outside of my immediate, you know, family had told me you matter, you can’t you you, you know, the world needs you. And, and for me, that was it was life changing. And, you know, and since then, you know, 30 years later, you know, I’ve had a chance to be at the governor’s house, Governor George Meijin and, you know, we had a whole press conference and we weren’t talking about politics or anything like that. We were talking about how, you know, here, he inspired this 12 year old kid, you know, so much so that when the conference was cancelled, and I got the phone call, and it was, you know, when you take this conference on, you know, it made, it made a lot of sense. It was like, Oh, I’m supposed to be doing that, you know, I’m supposed to be you know, and again, connecting the dots, which I love your platform because it’s, it’s it is all about that.
David Ralph [11:35]
He’s an amazing metaphor for life, isn’t it really connecting the dots or Join Up Dots as we call it? Because it works in so many ways, no matter what you look at in your life, whether you’re creating the dots forward, so they become stepping stones, or that you look back and as we said in the introduction, no experience is wasted. Now, for you. It seems to me that that the thing that jumped out at me which was bit strange Was you saying you’re a shy girl and the age of 12 he was a shy girl. But you had that ability to connect with people. And you’ve taken that all the way through your life where you to kind of get on it when the newbie come to a school and they come into the class where you’re the one that sort of like, took them by the hand and showed him around the classrooms. We will you always looking to sort of bridge those connections.
Michelle Patterson [12:22]
You know, I at an early age, I mean, I was painfully shy. And it’s funny because I’m, you know, speaking to an audience of 10,000 big, huge groups, and if somebody would have told me, you know, when I was a little girl that I’ve been doing that I wouldn’t have never believe it in a million years. And I think, I think for me, what happened was, you know, again, you know, I I left that interview with the governor, I ended up running for student body president of my high school, and being elected. I was president of my college, I went to Loyola Marymount University, and I worked at the Capitol and You know, for me again, it was that building block. But for me, it just showed me it was, you know, when you’re when you’re helping and you’re supporting, I mean, again, it’s it’s extremely fulfilling. And and so I think I did end up becoming that that young girl that was, you know, the welcoming waggon when someone new would come to school, you know. So definitely,
David Ralph [13:24]
I think he’s brilliant, though isn’t and that’s what comes up time and time again in his show that when people are saying, you know, what’s my passion, what’s my passion and I get so many emails from people saying, I’ve been listening to all your shows, and I’m starting to realise what you’re talking about, which is amazing, because that’s the starting point when you realise but actually what you should be doing has been with you all the time, it’s just that you’ve lost it somewhere down the line. But when you actually look back and you realise but there is a synergy between that young person and where you are now. It makes it doubly powerful, doesn’t it because you realise vain But you are being authentic, you are playing to the strengths that, that life or God or whatever the universe has given you. And when you start playing to your strengths, it’s, it’s, well, it’s more than double power, isn’t it? It’s like Rocket Power all over you.
Michelle Patterson [14:15]
Well, and then it becomes naturally. I mean, instead of feeling, you know, tired, I mean, you’re energised, and you know, I’ll get home from from being at an event. And, you know, I am I can go run a marathon. I mean, I feel like, you know, this is this is what I’m supposed to be doing. And it’s funny, my, my husband, who is, you know, my best best guy. I mean, he’s phenomenal. And, you know, I love this man. He’s, he’s opposite, completely opposite. I mean, for him going in and meeting new people and, you know, networking, and you know, he’d rather go to the dentist and get a root canal. I mean, he’s, he’s the opposite. You know, whereas for me, it’s, you know, I just, I feed off of that. Energy and I really, really enjoyed that. And I think, again, it’s to your point, it’s building off of those strengths. And you can look back on just my upbringing and my life and, and you see signs I mean, you know, you see signs of doing that and being a community builder and, and being those things and that’s where, you know i would i would encourage your listeners is you know that passion you know, it’s really it’s what makes your heart sing. You know what is it that you absolutely you could you could feel it. I mean it’s, it’s what you could see yourself doing day in and day out and it energises you and gets you excited. And I’ll share with you, you know a challenge that I ran into and why it was so important. You know that I had gone through the exercise of creating kind of my best life blueprint and knowing what my passion was. Because when you know what your passion is. When you run into challenges, and you run into problems, and you get off course, you’re able to get back on course, because you’re clear with your vision. And it’s your vision. It’s not somebody else’s vision. It’s not somebody else pushing their ideas on what they think that you should be doing. That for me, I had a situation the first year that I took over the conference, I was given this huge responsibility and had hired a sponsorship company to come in and help with the funding and a pipeline. You know, it’s a multi million dollar event, they pipeline 7 million of funding and out of the 7 million, the total amount that they came in with was 100,000. So we ended up being 17 days before the big huge, huge event, you know, here that I had been entrusted to take on. And 17 days prior to the event. I’m $1.8 million US dollars in a depth It and and I can remember sitting down with my, you know, investor and him telling me, you know, Michelle shut the event down, shut it down, you know, you might as well make it $2 million, you know, round it up but you don’t have the money and shut it down. And I responded and just said no, you know, I’m not going to turn it. I’m not going to shut this down. You know it already it was an event that had been cancelled once before by the state and it wasn’t going to cancel it. And for me, it was going back to you know, that passion. And that experience I had is 12 year old of, you know, being able to communicate to women, you know, everywhere how much they matter. You know how brilliant and how beautiful they are just the way they are. And so, ended up going through 17 I call it the 17 glorious days, but have just really, you know, raised Seeing money and making phone call after phone call after phone call and showing up and just being vulnerable and asking, you know, asking for the support and being able to share my passion and where I was headed. And why this was so important. And, you know, and I mean, just had such amazing, you know, miracle after miracle of things happening and, you know, and then you know, people come to the table that were just, you know, Michelle, what are you doing? Shut it down, you know, what are you thinking? But we got through that whole process we’ve been raising in 17 days we raised 1.65 million. And it was simply because we shared our passion, we shared the vision and we asked you know, we asked for the support we asked for the help.
David Ralph [18:51]
Is that passion, no reason a the passion in your voice. It comes across and when you were talking I could actually feel my stomach stirring things. My God, she must have had some sleepless nights laying there staring at the ceiling thinking, what the hell am I doing? Did you did you query yourself? You must have queried what you were doing.
Michelle Patterson [19:11]
Oh, oh, I was completely in control. I never worried at all No, people. If you believe that, David, I’ve got a fact that a swap to sell, you know, I, I have to share this with you. And again, I’m, I need to probably be nicer to my husband. Because after I get done talking about this, obviously, gosh, you know, he is such a great, great guy. But there was one night in particular. It was the first couple nights I had started reaching out calling everybody I could and I had raised, you know, ended up being able to get support from the mayor’s office and so forth. But we raised some money, but I still was 1.4 million in a deficit. And I remember, you know, going home that night thinking you know, my husband’s an accountant in a finance guy thinking you know what, he’s on a need to know basis and I don’t think I need to tell him right now that I’m you know, 1.4 million in a deficit and I owe you know, in 16 days, I’ll hold off I’ll wait and see how how I do. And so I go to sleep that night and I’m must have been having full blown nightmares because I’m tossing and turning I’m, you know, in my sleep, so he turns on the light two o’clock in the morning and he’s like, Michelle, what is going on with you? Like, you’ve kicked me at four times. You know, you’re talking to your sleep, tossing, turning What’s going on? And I said, you know, Eric, I’ve really done it this time. I’m, you know, 1.4 million in a deficit I was 1.8. But I 1.4 this is the situation and but you know, this is this is really not not a good situation at all. This man looks at me, you know my husband. And he says to me, he goes, Michelle, because I’ve been married to you time as 15 years because I’ve been married to you for 15 years and I’ve watched you pull stuff out of your, and I’ll let you fill in the blank. I can get a couple of couple choice words. And he goes in you, you’ve always you figured it out. You always figured it out. He goes, it always seems worse late at night, it always seems, you know, scary. That’s when you’re in fear. He goes, go back to bed, you know, go back to sleep and you’ll be you know, in the morning you can get after it and I’m thinking, Okay, seriously, like, What is wrong with you? Like, I didn’t say 1400 dollars. I didn’t say 14,000. I said $1.4 million. Like, are you not hearing what I’m saying? And, and and what that taught me it will couple things. One is, you know, and I and I think the hard thing is you You look at is how do we show up for for other people? You know, I ended up getting through that we raised 1.65 million. The conference went off. It was amazing. You know, as a result, we’ve been able to go all over the world, and we’re building the largest community for women. But I have to tell you, David, I go back to that night. And I think about it. And I think, would I have been so loving, you know, how would I have showed up for my husband? The way that he showed up for me, and honestly, I don’t, I don’t know. I mean, it gets me choked up because I think, you know, I would I have just blasted him out of the water and said, you know, what did you do and why would you put our family in this situation? You know, or what I have been loving, you know, like, he like he was
Unknown Speaker [22:47]
Yeah, he was and when you
Michelle Patterson [22:49]
I don’t know, I mean, I’m trying to be as authentic and as honest, and I think, you know, I think that’s, you know, something you know, for for us is You know, as we go through life and and and we have our passion and we have our dream, and everybody has it, it’s, you know, how are we showing up for other people? You know, how do we show for ourselves? I mean, we’re kind of lousy, you know, at times the monkey chatter that we do to ourselves isn’t always very good. You know, it’s pretty negative at times. And so my, my challenge to your listeners would be, you know, how do you show up for yourself? How do you show for others? You know, do you share what your passion is? Do you share what your vision is? And, you know, thank God that that my husband was so brilliant, and, and, and loved me and, and was inspiring, and, you know, and didn’t let me quit and was encouraging. And, you know, I look at, I look at throughout my life, and, you know, again, going back to your comment about connecting the dots, you know, and I think about the government George Deukmejian, you know, here, he he inspired this 12 year old kid took 15 minutes, you know, granted her an interview, and and was positive. And, you know, we have that same opportunity every single day, you know, whether it’s with our spouse, with our kids, or, you know, in the case of Governor George evasion, he never he never met me. He never even knew if he would see me again. But again, how do you show up? And I think that’s what it is, is tapping into that. And if we do that for each other, you do think about how much we would be able to achieve collectively if we supported each other in that way.
David Ralph [24:39]
Oh, I agree with this wholeheartedly. I really do and I’m gonna we’re going to talk about this in a moment but I’m gonna play some words actually, but a very relevant to what you did in your darkest hour when he was laying in bed with Eric probably snowing but aside even if he’s like me, and these are words Oprah said recently and I think they are so powerful. For those moments when you are in those black dots on the Join Up, Dots timeline, this is Oprah.
Unknown Speaker [25:05]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself, what is the next
Unknown Speaker [25:12]
right move? not think about, Oh,
Unknown Speaker [25:15]
I got all of this stuff, what is the next right move. And then from that space, make the next right move, and the next right move, and not to be overwhelmed by it. Because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment, you know, you’re not defined by what somebody says, is a failure for you. Because failure is just there to point you in a different direction.
David Ralph [25:37]
Now, those words are so powerful, and they’re really sort of powerful. joining up the conversation that we’ve just had, because even if that conference had gone wrong, it wouldn’t have defined you with it. That’s the thing. It wouldn’t have been a failure. It would have just been a learning curve to move on with.
Michelle Patterson [25:55]
Absolutely. But I think the piece I would add to that, and I Love those comments. And I think the piece that I would add to that would be with your ego as you look at that next step is checking your ego. I think so often, you know, we go in and we’ve got this mindset where we can’t show weakness and, you know, and or, or we want to get our message across and so we’re going to make somebody else wrong for their thought process or whatever that is. And so, so often we’re making these decisions based on ego. I know for me, you know, I was making call after call after call after call, I mean, it was the most horrific, exhilarating, awful, I mean, conversation. I mean, I can remember talking to my dad and my dad was so cute. You know, my dad loves me dearly. And my father, you know, he calls me many and he says, you know, many, we need to get a real job. What are you going to get a real job? And I thought, Dad, this is not the time To have the real job conversation, and my dad wasn’t saying it because he didn’t want to be supportive, or he loved me he, he was saying it because he was afraid for me. And, you know, and so I think what happens oftentimes is, you know, ego shows up and you know, I would make a phone call, and the call would not go well. And then it would keep me from not wanting to look bad. And then deciding, okay, make that next call and make that next call. And so being able to go ahead and check your ego and look at the bigger picture. I mean, the only reason why I got through what I got through and did what we did was because my passion was far greater than my fear. And it wasn’t that I wasn’t fearful. I was petrified. And I felt it I mean, there was two days I had a nice you know, I timed it. I had two meltdowns when you’re still
David Ralph [27:56]
scared now when you when when you’re talking about it. Can you still
Michelle Patterson [28:00]
Talking about it. My, my PR company sat me down when I first started talking about this and they said, Michelle, do not share the story with anybody don’t share this and makes you look weak. And I’m I looked at him, I thought, I’m going to tell everybody and anybody that will listen, I go, that is the problem. He said,
David Ralph [28:19]
Is it a male PR person or lady?
Unknown Speaker [28:22]
It was? Yes. Well,
David Ralph [28:24]
yeah, if it’s a male person, I can see why he’s saying that because men have a different way of thinking about it. But what you’re showing you’re showing strength of character, you’re showing commitment to the cause. And you’re showing by high and mighty screw up, but I am trying my best and I think nowadays, that is more powerful than anything isn’t it is more powerful than that kind of the go getting Gordon Gekko businessman but you suddenly find out that he’s in a hole of 600 million and he looks at all successful, but he wasn’t. I think what you were doing and what you’re sharing is brilliant PR and he’s totally well
Michelle Patterson [29:01]
Well, and if you think about it, too, it’s, you know, my story was 1.8 million. That was the challenge I went through, but every single person has their story, whether it’s a mortgage, or a marriage, or 5 million or 50. That I mean, everybody’s got their challenge, and what they’re going through and, and I think if they look at life in such a way where I mean, this is we’re on a big, huge school. I mean, this is, it’s a huge playground, and we’re all learning and nobody gets through life unscathed. Nobody gets through life, not experiencing life and going through this. And so it is about these relationships. It is about how you’re developing, you know, yourself and what you’re going through. And one of the things that Oprah says, you know, she’ll make the comment, it’s okay, God, you know, you know, helped me learn what I’m supposed to learn and then get me out of this situation. You know, and I think that’s what happens with people is that they start to see that reoccurring theme or that reoccurring problem continue to pop up, you know, because they’re not learning it, they’re not able to turn the page because I haven’t learned that lesson.
David Ralph [30:16]
Because I’m really passionately and this is gonna sound stupid and I know all the listeners are gonna slap their hands on their heads and say, What’s he talking about? But I actually look forward to the dark moments. Now those those periods when everything’s going a bit, as we say, in the United Kingdom, pear shaped a little bit wrong. Because when you get through them, and more often than not, you do get through them. You’ve learned so much in that period, that you are much better at doing the job. I suppose. you sharpen up your tools somehow. And I look at this and I’ve looked at everything in my life doing this job because it’s a great reflection for me, and I realised everything that’s led me to this point, as pretty It’s been bad experiences. And it’s those bad experiences but you learn from and the easy stuff is great. But you’re not gonna learn anything sitting on the grass, having an ice cream in the sunshine, I you
Michelle Patterson [31:11]
know, and I think life is gonna be boring too. I mean, I think, you know, when you talk about that passion and you talk about, I mean, it’s, you know, I’ve so much passion around what I’m doing. But there’s also been tears that have been shed, there’s also you know, I’ve gone through those emotions and, you know, in an old say, you know, you know, when you work hard for something, it’s, it’s really worth it, you know, you know, that makes it all that much more worthwhile. And so, so that’s the biggest thing is just, I love I mean, talk about arriving David and the fact that you get that, I think, you know, again, I’m in my 40s and so I’m starting to, like feel that way. But, you know, it’s, that’s that’s an awesome place to be when you have These challenges, you know, come at you is that you look at them for what they are. And that’s all they are, is they’re just challenges. They don’t define you. They don’t, you know, describe who you are, they don’t, you know, that’s all they are, is their opportunities to, to just, you know, I said this to my team. I made the comment I said, this, what I’m going through right now, it’s forcing me to be a better human being. You know, it’s just, you know, it’s forcing me to take that next step. I mean, when you’re when you’re doing a global movement, and you’re mobilising troops and you stand for collaboration, and you stand for teams working together, for me, you know, with my team, and there’s 1000 people that come together to put on the California wins conference. It’s, you know, we have to be about working collectively together. We have to be about women and men supporting women and collectively sleeping together. And there’s times where I feel like you know, I fall down. I make mistakes, I get back up and it’s it again what it is, is it’s forcing we can’t we can’t teach others how to practice this if we ourselves aren’t going to be the really breathing and sleeping this this this mission is way of living.
David Ralph [33:21]
But what you’re doing being so open and honest with your team, you are really building loyalty. I bet your team who loves you, because you’re actually saying look, I’m trying my best I might screw up but please support me and we will get through it. But is teamwork at its best, isn’t it?
Michelle Patterson [33:40]
You know, I mean it is and I
I have some amazing I just have a phenomenal team. I mean, it’s, you know, for me, and this goes back to my recruiting days but it’s it’s always looking for people that are just so gifted and so talented way better. things than you you are. And I think being secure in who you are, it’s, you know, knowing that you have certain gifts. But just because someone else has these great gifts, it doesn’t mean that it detracts from the gifts that you have. And and being able to show up and I the hard things I see with women is that we’ve competed for so long, you know for that one seat and that one spot and and we don’t need to anymore and we absolutely don’t need to and so you can’t show up and and have these brilliant gifts and then have, you know, your teammate and your associate and they have brilliant gifts and collectively, I mean, that’s when you create, you know, amazing things, but it’s not detracting away from someone else’s talents and gifts just because, you know, they have they’re offering something, you know, different or even sometimes the same.
David Ralph [34:52]
Well, what I love about this show is the fact that it’s come along, I think at the right time when opportunities are their highest level. And as you were saying, Yeah, ladies have always been competing for that chair that chair that seat. But nowadays you could create your own seat Couldn’t you, you’ve got so much opportunity out there to connect virtually build global companies online. And you can do it really on a shoestring. All you need to do is show the hustle and the commitment to the task. Now, what we talked about a lot on here, Michelle is the fact that for the listeners out there about wanting to do more, but they they don’t want to do the leap of faith because it’s too scary and how is too scary. If you got a salary coming in, you’ve got to throw it up in the air. So we talk about the slider faith, where you transition for a period of time where you work in the evenings and you do Saturday afternoons on a side hustle until it becomes profitable enough to sort of move on. Do you see that as a kind of movement that is happening in the world as well from, from your conversations with ladies is a republic. Now, but you can actually create your own economy that probably wasn’t there five years ago.
Michelle Patterson [36:06]
Oh, absolutely. It’s happening. I mean, I look at my team, I mean, I have a virtual team, you have people all over the world, that tap in that, you know, this is this is what they spend their time on. This is their full time job and, you know, coming together and, you know, what, what’s happening with women network, I mean, we’re able to go ahead and capture video and capture footage and wherever we’re able to be places in the world that physically, I mean, it’s not safe. But because of technology, we’re able to go there. And and it’s what’s exciting is that when you start looking at connecting the dots with different parts of the world is that there’s this common You know, there’s there’s a common theme, and we’re not so different from one another. And we have some of the same things, you know, that keep us up at night and that worry Some want to be able to you give back to our community and help. And so that’s, that’s what’s so neat is that you do take away those barriers and those walls, I mean, that what I talked about earlier with Gallup poll and doing the survey they did for 50 years and going through and looking at, you know, what leads to your happiest life. And we, we take people through a whole, you know, you can download it from our site, women network, and just have the worksheets and take yourself through it, you know, no cost, but what we found was that they looked at across all parts, all sectors of the world, men and women and all ethnic backgrounds, and that’s what they came up with as those five areas. And it was interesting because, like, the one that really stood out for me was the Financial Peace. You know, the people you know, once you had your, the house, you know, the roof over your head and you had your basic needs met, you know, people that you know, had an abundance of wealth. And we’re making the millions the happiness metre did not jump off the chart, it didn’t, you know, took off, these people weren’t happier, it truly was looking at these five to thrive areas. And, you know, when you looked at social and the relationships that you’ve had, and, you know, and how you’re building those and the way you’re giving back, I mean, career was defined as, you know, how you’re spending your energy, you know, what do you do with your time, and in and having that passion around and be able to serve a purpose. So, so that to me was is really exciting. And and I think that we are, you know, lightning speed ahead. I mean, it’s only, you know, the more content that’s being provided out there, and the more you know, we’re able to jump on and do a call like this and from different parts of the world in and it’s like, it’s like you’re sitting right next to me.
David Ralph [39:00]
is astonishing. And I’ve done 325 shows now and it is still slightly amazes me when I press a button and the person just appears at the other end. And when you throw it in like the webcam so you can actually see the person moving around. It’s I’m quite old school in many ways, but but technology and when you see people that are around the curve, and they’re actually creating the curve is unbelievable what the next generation are going to have at their fingertips. You know, my mic, my kids, it slightly winds me up, but my kids moan that somebody hasn’t paused the TV when they’ve gone off. And I say to them when I was a kid, you couldn’t pause TV, if you had to go off to the toilet, you just missed it. And when you come back, if you wanted to go out on your bike, that was it. You never saw the TV programme. And that there’s that that connectivity and there’s the ability to create your own environment, which is just astonishing. And I think the next generation, Ben Ben not gonna need companies They’re literally gonna create their own economies. It’s astonishing to me.
Michelle Patterson [40:05]
It is, and it’s just, it’s happening at such a rapid pace and, and you definitely feel this this trend of communicating, you know, again, what you need what you want. And that’s why it’s so important is that people feel like they can’t, they can’t share what their passion is or they can’t share. You know, nobody wants to hear nobody wants to pay attention and and that’s so far from the truth. It really is. You know, and I think I don’t even know how to say that the same but it’s, it’s, you know, people will listen when they know that you’re listening to them, you know, and and, and that’s where I go back. It’s, you know, the examples I gave with my husband and Governor George Deukmejian. And, you know, it’s, it’s, you know, do you know, I mean, do you personally know you know, do the marriage check? Do you know what, you know the people that you love, what their passions are, you know, have you asked it You know, and that’s when that’s when you’ll find your passion is coming through is is, is find out what others are feeling and what they’re they’re experiencing and what makes their heart sing. And to me, that’s the first place you go, because then it comes back to fold. You mean it really does.
David Ralph [41:18]
That’s probably some words once again, your perfect that is your professional, you’re leaving me and leading me up the path. This is um, this is Jim Carrey.
Jim Carrey [41:27]
My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [41:54]
Now that seems to me obviously incredibly powerful words which I play literally on every show. But it seems to me a conversation between you and your your dad, as you were saying your dad, get a job many get get a get a get a safe job get one that I understand. Where do you sit on that
Unknown Speaker [42:13]
is the risky
David Ralph [42:14]
job yours always the risky job doing something else?
Michelle Patterson [42:19]
No, I think, you know, people look at it oftentimes as Oh, I want to go, I want to make the big money I want to that will follow if you’re, if you’re not working on what makes your heart sing, and that passion and that true desire. And again, it has to be your passion. You know, so often, you know, we take the safe route, and we do we think we should be doing because that’s, you know, there’s less risk that’s involved. And, you know, I look back and I’m thinking, gosh, you know, had I quit, you know, all the things that would have happened, we wouldn’t have gotten global. We wouldn’t have we have women network channel. We wouldn’t have had, you know, going out to 110 million homes, we wouldn’t have had any of these things that would have happened if if I had not, you know, really believed in my passion in my dream. And, and for me, I always look at if I can think it, you know, then I can I can do it, if I can think it and dream it and build it in my head. And I can I can visualise it in my in my mind and manifest it that way that I can do it. And, and I know that if I don’t have the answers, you know, there’s plenty of people that I can go to, to ask for the help. I mean, people love giving advice, they love sharing, you know, the challenges and things they went through. And, you know, with my dad, going back to that comment, I mean, I’m, I’m fortunate because, you know, I was raised where, you know, my mom and dad, I mean, I really did think, you know, at an early age, you know, if I wanted to be president or if I wanted to be governor, I could do I mean, I, I never had that feeling of, I couldn’t do something, it was really up to me. Like, if I wanted to do it, I could achieve that. And, you know, and so I was very, very, very, very blessed to be able to have that. And, you know, my husband, you know, he’s an accountant, you know, and he, he, you know, where, where I, I, when I, when I taught him, it’s like, you know, Eric, you know, for him, it’s that safety, you know, net that consistency. You know, you know, process and so he’ll make decisions based on you know, it’s a safer route to go and, and, and I know, you know, he’s, he’s not always doing what makes his heart sing. I mean, he’s, he’s taking a safer route. So, so those are some of the things I mean, that you know, we as a, as a couple and just you know, having a You know, my best friend, it’s like we, we talked about that. And, you know, again, you don’t want to surround yourself with, you know, the Yes, people in your world that are always going to tell you what you want to hear. But you also want to surround yourself with people that that, you know, they love you so much they’re going to support you, you know, through that process. So, it’s, it’s important. The other piece I was going to tell you, David is one of the things that I did, and it was a painful exercise, but I encourage everybody to do this is I created my personal board of directors. And I remember when I went through this process, I had very few people that ended up on that list. And, and it was an eye opener. I mean, instead of having, you know, a really solid, you know, board I had like three people that I could go to, and so I made a conscious effort of Going out and seeking out those mentors, and pulling those people in whether it was, you know, a financial advisor or an attorney, or, you know, our, you know, somebody that’s a, you know, the auto dealer, you know, that I can work with on being able to get, you know, the best, right? I mean, who, who ends up on your personal board of directors. So So yeah, this is like a vision
David Ralph [46:22]
board of directors is it that you’ve got,
Michelle Patterson [46:24]
you know, it actually it’s even simplified more than that. I have the vision boards and all that kind of stuff. But this is just literally a worksheet. And it’s, you know, what do you go to for financial advice? Who do you go to Who’s your CPA, who’s your attorney who’s your? And again, I think with women, what happens oftentimes is we’re risk adverse, you know, financially, I mean, we’ve we haven’t played in this space, you know, men have been playing in it for 2000 years, women have been playing it for 50 years, if I’m managing the finances so Again, we kind of leave that off for, you know, the, your significant other and in my case, you know, my husband being a, you know, he’s a CPA, you know, I didn’t pay attention, it was like, Oh, that’s his job, he’ll handle that. And, you know, God forbid something happens, or, you know, and for me, what was an eye opener as again, going back to these five to thrive in the financial well being is, you know, I needed to have a clear vision of what all five of those were and so, to be able to look at, you know, what, what was my personal financial situation, where was I at? And then what, what, where was the starting point and then how did I build from there and so having a realistic approach, so the the personal Board of Directors is really, you know, being able to pull in and and not not lean away from having those advisors but really looking at Okay, you know, where do I need that support, you know, what areas is, you know, do I not have the answers for that I need to seek that out. Now I have a great personal Board of Directors, that keeps me You know, they’re they’re able to I’m able to learn from them the mistakes that they face and challenges that they face and they’re able to, you know, give me insight so that I can avoid making some of the same mistakes I’ve made,
David Ralph [48:21]
because of what you’ve done. There is a mental battle, isn’t it? It’s the fact that you have gone to people to say, Look, I don’t know this, I need your help, where so many people will kind of think to themselves, what have I got to offer? And so keep themselves small. But generally, if you do reach out and I think I started talking about this on episode one, literally, but if you do reach out and you ask for people’s help, and you do it in the right way, more than not people will help you only that they they like to see people pushing themselves and trying to develop and it doesn’t matter if it’s Richard Branson or Donald Trump. Whatever, if you do it in the right way, more often than not, or literally every time really, I would say they will help you.
Michelle Patterson [49:07]
Absolutely, absolutely. That’s what I think is. So I think, again, we go about things and we make things so much harder than they need to be. And and I think that we create these stories in our head of just this, really all these challenges and worry and everything. And, and, and we don’t have to do that. We don’t have to go there. And, and, and, and again, I think to your point, I mean, that’s probably one of the neatest things I’ve heard. You know, your comment about when I have challenges. I look at those, you know, as opportunities. I mean, it’s like, it’s actually exciting, those dark, dark moments where you get to see how you’re going to show up and you get better and better and better. It’s a learning process.
David Ralph [49:49]
I’m going to play some words. Now that became the whole theme of the show. And they really tied together, not just all our shows, but the conversation that we’ve had today. This is Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [50:00]
course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [50:35]
I got the feeling that you would buy into those words.
Michelle Patterson [50:38]
Yeah, and I’ve heard I’ve heard that the speech that he gave, and it was funny when I first heard it, I thought, Oh my gosh, that’s me. That’s me. I mean, you know, again, now looking back and I think oh my gosh, what if what if I quit? What if I didn’t go down that path and, and again, you know, there are no accidents? I mean, you know, me being that 12 year old kid That went through you know and and was so scared to interview the governor and then for how you know loving he was and his comments back and and inspiring me is this 12 year old kid and then going on you know, there’s there’s so much there’s so much about what Steve Jobs was saying and connecting the dots now you look back. And for me, it’s because I was already connecting those dots. It kept me from giving up, it kept me from quitting, you know, I knew I had to stay on that path. And even when it got really, really really, really tough, I’m convinced I know that it was because I I was connecting the dots. I wasn’t supposed to quit I was supposed to stay on that path. And you know, I’m so thankful that that that’s what you know what what happened as a result, but it was it was just holding on tight to those two those dots and that passion that had started At an early age,
David Ralph [52:01]
and do you have a big dot when you look back on everything and go? Yeah, yeah, I think that was it. I think that was when Michelle started really moving.
Michelle Patterson [52:11]
You know, I mean, truly the the probably the big draw for me was, you know, when I left being that, you know, from that interview, I ran, I ran for student government, and I ran eight elections and I never lost I got I kept getting elected and, and it was, you know, again, just that building block, but I ended up stepping into running for office, which again, was something that was completely foreign to me, that would never have done that. But I was inspired. I was, and I felt like wow, you know, I matter I can’t, but that’s, you know, if I can do what I did, everybody can do what their passion is, I mean, period and a story. I will argue that till I’m blue in the face with a Any one of your listeners, you absolutely can do it if I did what I was able to do, and stepping in again, not being the governor not being Maria Shriver who I stepped into her shoes not being a Kennedy and not having a big huge money tree in my backyard. You know, if I did what I did, you know, that means that you absolutely without a doubt can do it. It’s just deciding it’s making the decision. It’s looking fear in the face and saying, I’m, you know, I see you but I’m not going to be you. And, and and pushing forward.
David Ralph [53:36]
Well, when you’re arguing blue in the face, I’m going to stand by the side of you holding your hand and I will argue as well because I just think about everything now and it’s been a such a mindset shift, as I say, from my corporate gig to where I am now. But I just think it’s just down to us. And as I suppose Branson says, really well. Screw it, just do it. Just Just do it and if it goes wrong, vent, pivot and try again and just keep on moving forward because these Uber successful guys, God, they’ve made mistakes. They’ve made huge screw ups. But still they keep on going forward. Because I know as Oprah says, it doesn’t define you does it, it’s only that moment, it’s that learning experience is making the next dot. Even more powerful, because you’re sprinkling manoeuvre on it yet, your crappy time is the bad time that makes the next one grow better.
Michelle Patterson [54:29]
Well, and even add to that, too, it’s, you know, next week, I might have a bad day, I might wake up and just be like, Oh, this is a credit, you know, and I try to start my days off is just being grateful and, you know, being so thankful and when you go into that, that thought process of gratitude, it does shift, you know, and and again, you can’t have a negative thought and positive thought at the same time negative thoughts will outweigh and so really being deliberate Okay, here’s my positive thought. But we are human beings, we fall down, and that’s okay. And that’s why I think it’s so important for us, you know, to be very transparent of, yeah, we’re human, you know, do I have fear? Do I feel insecurity do I have? Absolutely, um, but we’re where I draw the line in the sand, it’s, I’m going to show up a certain way and I, I’m at the point now, and maybe it’s been in my 40s, but I just don’t care. I don’t care. I’m okay. If you don’t like me, you know, I’m okay. You know, I love that saying to David, you know, it doesn’t matter. It’s none of your business. what other people think of you, I love that. I love that. I love that saying so. So that’s where it’s, again, just, you know, keep it in perspective. You know, don’t put so much pressure on yourself that you have to be perfect and, you know, and and, you know, to think that your thoughts are always going to be You know, happy, happy, happy and that’s it’s not realistic, you will fall, you will make mistakes you will. I think it’s just being aware and getting back on course, and and showing up with this attitude of gratitude, and then you will win and you will have your best best life.
David Ralph [56:19]
Here, hey, I couldn’t have said it better myself. Well, this is the end of the show. And this is the part that we called a sermon on the mic when I’m going to send you back in time to have a one on one with the younger you and if you could go back in time and speak to the younger version of Michelle, what age would you choose and what advice would you give when I’m going to play the theme tune and when it fades, you’re up. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Michelle Patterson [57:06]
So when you get up in the morning, and you are showing up with an attitude of gratitude, remember that, that this is a huge playground that you get to come and just play on and have life’s amazing experiences. And when life throws you challenges is to accept those challenges for what they are, and tackle those challenges and be able to grow from them every time in the exciting thing is, is that once you learn from these, then you’re able to go ahead and give those experiences back to others and share with others what you’ve learned as a result. But keep things in perspective. You know, keep reminding yourself is this is just this big school of life. And when you find yourself taking yourself so serious Sleep and you’re doubting yourself and you’re thinking of all the ways and the reasons why something can’t happen just remember you’re not supposed to have all the answers you’re in school you’re in school to learn, and you’re in school to develop and you’re in school to have fun. And and go at it that way and don’t grip the bat so tight. And you know, I can remember at an early age of being able to go ahead and and and pushing myself and stepping out of my comfort zone. And and it was uncomfortable and it didn’t always feel good. But the times that I had the most fun and then I learned the most were those times when I did push myself and I did step out of the comfort zone. And so don’t play it safe. Don’t take the easy road unless you want boring unless you know you don’t want to have this like amazing life. Then definitely play it easy and don’t push yourself. But if you want to play a big life, and if you want to have passion, like the passion that I have, for what I’m doing, then then step out of your comfort zone, get out of your head. You know, get out of that negative chatter, and enrol the dice. I mean, if you’re gonna bet on anybody, bet on yourself, you know, you know you, and that’s a safe safe bet. So, thank you so much for having me, David. It has been such a pleasure sharing this last hour with you. And I am excited to just continue the dialogue. And for those that want to participate and get involved with women network, we are building the largest community globally for women. And whether you are a mentor or a mentee, women need your support mean they need Your support. Its women who m e n. network.com. Thanks, David.
David Ralph [1:00:08]
We will have over links on the show notes. Michelle, thank you so much for spending time with us today, joining up those dots. And please come back again when you have more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our pass is the best way to build our futures. Michelle Patterson, thank you so much. Thanks for listening to today’s episode of Join Up Dots brought to you exclusively by podcast is mastery.com. The only resource that shows you how to create a show, build an income and still have time for the life that you love. Check out podcast is mastery.com.
Now, David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you or wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.