Welcome to the Join Up Dots Podcast with Dr Natalie Forest
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Introducing Dr Natalie Forest
Dr Natalie Forest is todays guest on Join Up Dots, she is a teacher, a mom, student of life, a speaker, bestselling author, eTV host, former radio host, executive coach, and mentor.
But before you think that this is a lady who mentors you by helping you find the “Inner Self” that is just waiting for you to tap into, then think again.
She isn’t one those ladies that help find your inner potential and whoosh like a rocket ship, you will shoot your way to your true future.
The kind of future that you deserve.
Our guest instead has found that you can live your Ultimate Success, by studying the consistencies or repetitions in history, the reasons behind “what happened”.
How The Dots Joined Up For Dr Natalie
What are the patterns that occur time and time again that can send us on the slippery slope to despair and failure, and what are the ones that will lead us onto success.
With her proven 5-step program, she helps all of us identify our consistencies and which of those consistencies require our attention as they may be those patterns that prevent you from having all the success you can have.
As she says “After all, if we keep doing the same thing, how can we expect different outcomes?”
Now this seems to me to be an amazingly common sense approach to me, so why do we not a focus in on the power of patterns in our own lives?
And can she see a time in her life, when this wasn’t something that she was aware off too?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots, with the one and only Dr Natalie Forest
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Dr Natalie Forest such as:
Why she feels it so important to be able to disconnect from technology to give 100% attention to the people of the world.
How she always remembers having a desire to be a teacher, or a mentor in her life, even as a very small child.
How you can start to assess your own history, by looking at the things that make you happy, and what causes your stress levels to occur.
How she has now got to the point of not excepting societies “Yes” and “No” and will make the big decisions better than ever before
How she can’t wait to buy a BMW motor bike, and drive fast down the freeways of Baltimore loving being 100% herself.
How To Connect With Dr Natalie Forest
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Full Introduction Of Dr Natalie Forest Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
Today’s show is brought to you by podcast is mastery.com, the premier online community teaching you to podcast like a pro. Check us out now at podcasters mastery.com.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:38]
Yes, hello there, everybody and welcome to another episode of Join Up Dots. This is Episode 331. And I’m gonna enjoy this one today because I tell you what, I’m gonna let you in on the secret. We’ve got a German lady who every now and again talks like a cowboy. Now you don’t get that very often, but that’s gonna make it extremely enjoyable to see. Where the accent goes. So today’s guest on Join Up Dots is a teacher, a mom, student of life a speaker, best selling author, a TV host, former radio host, executive coach and a mentor. But before you think that this is a lady who mentors you by helping you find the inner self that is waiting for you to tap into. When think again, she isn’t just one of those ladies that help you find your inner potential and wash like a rocket ship, your shoot your way to your true future, the kind of future that you deserve. Now, our guest instead has found that you can live your ultimate success by studying the consistencies or repetitions in history. The reasons behind what happened, what are the patterns that occur time and time again, that can send us on the slippery slope to despair and failure and what are the ones that would lead us on to success. Now with a proven five step programme, she helps all of us identify our consistencies and which of those consistencies require our attention, as they may be those patterns that prevent you from having all the success you can have as she says, If we keep on doing the same thing, how can we expect different outcomes? Now this seems to me to be an amazingly common sense approach. So why do we not focus in on the power patterns in our own lives? And can she see a time in her life when this wasn’t something that she was aware of, too? Well, let’s find out, as we bring on the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Dr. Natalie Forest. How are you, Dr. Natalie,
Dr. Natalie Forest [2:22]
I am just outstanding, and my brain is going left and right trying to find out what patterns we’re going to talk about today. So I’m just happy to be here.
David Ralph [2:31]
Well, I’m slightly worried because I’m going to let the audience into this. But we said a couple of words into the introduction, and you blast me with some kind of weird power and my whole system crashed, which has never happened in 331 episodes, but it did the whole screens went white. And I was caught off guard for a while and you were saying that you can actually go into rooms and blow up TV sets and radios go off with
Dr. Natalie Forest [2:57]
Oh, well, I wouldn’t say that. I do that purpose. But yes, for some reason on occasion that has happened, even though just like you just like everybody else in the world nowadays, I use a computer and I have yet to do that to a computer. But I have gone to places and all of a sudden, nothing worked anymore. Yes, maybe it’s just bad karma.
David Ralph [3:19]
Wouldn’t it be good that you could go into a restaurant and you know, when you see those tables and the families around through a meal, and they’re all looking at their own phones, and you just like blast them and kill over signal? That would be amazing when
Dr. Natalie Forest [3:31]
I would love to do that. Because we really need to get off the phone sometimes and just focus on who we are and who we are with
David Ralph [3:38]
you somebody that is aware of who you are. Are you really connected to yourself? Or do you find yourself doing that as well when you’re out on a on a lovely romantic evening and you’ve spent half the time looking at your phone all the time?
Dr. Natalie Forest [3:52]
I used to do that. But I can honestly say that at this point in my life. I know who I am. I know who I want to spend time with. And I have made commitments, promises to myself and others that when I’m with them, they are the most important person in the world. So unless there is an emergency, I am not going to answer the phone under no circumstances.
David Ralph [4:16]
So what happens is, you start answering the phone you you’re giving them 110% then the most important person in the world, but they keep them looking at their phone all the time because I I go out for meals with my wife, and she always blames it. What happens if it’s an emergency and I go, it never happens. You never get an emergency Really? once once in a blue moon, something slightly annoying might happen but an emergency doesn’t happen. So what what would you do if you went out you gave all your attention on this dream date, and but they’re not paying attention to you.
Dr. Natalie Forest [4:52]
I think I would call it a night because if they cannot give me attention then I think They’re too busy with other things, and they don’t really know what they are and what they want and who they are. And not that I would blame them for it. But you know, we’re all going through stages in our lives. I mean, like I said, before I, I’ve done that, too, at some point I got, I got so caught up in trying to be connected. And I guess, in a sense, hoping that there’d be an emergency where I could serve or help. And at this point, it’s just like, I don’t do that anymore. Even though sometimes I think, you know, on that dream date of my dream date, who I happen to be married to, of course, were to say, I might get an A. Yeah, I know. You never know. I mean, if they warn you beforehand, I think then it’s a whole different ballgame. But no, I think it’s just it’s just rude. It’s just really rude. And it also shows you how comfortable somebody is with themselves and how peaceful they are with themselves.
David Ralph [5:56]
So So how have you done this because this is a core thing is For Success, allowing yourself the chance to disconnect but where we’re seeing the world speed up get faster and faster and faster, and everyone’s got their, their clever phones and their iPads and bisbing and that thing, how have you managed to say no, actually, I’m not playing that game and I’m going to turn myself off and, and, and be a human again, how have you managed that?
Dr. Natalie Forest [6:23]
The honest sob that I’m not 100% sure other than that, I’ve really gone through the steps that I’m trying to help others with. And one of the things that I, I balance and sometimes it’s a challenge is the, you know, using or over using technology versus the human side. And I think it’s, it’s partly due to my background as a historian that I can, I can see that not everything that is considered to be progress is really better for us. So since I’ve got that point of view, I think I’m able to Sometimes just, you know, put things to the side. I think another really crucial thing for me, just happens to be and this doesn’t apply to everybody. But it happened to be that I now have a daughter. And when I’m with her, I made the promise that I’m with her. So in that sense, I really put the phone away. But even before that, you know, I don’t like all of all of the technology. I remember the first blackberry that I ever got, and it had to be a flip phone. I so miss my flip phone because the other things are on phones. Of course, I had to have one of the other androids, whatever they are, because of all this stuff when you’re travelling, but I miss my flip phone that to me, is a phone. Everything else is a computer. It’s not a phone. So, you know, I think I just I really learned and partially because of the way that I was taught That there’s nothing more precious in life than giving somebody your time. And once that really sinks in, because people make a choice when they spend time with you, right? So, for example, you and I were talking, you are giving me a huge gift by giving me your time and listening and communicating and interacting because you could be doing 100,000 other things. So in return, I want to give you the same kind of respect back and and I’ve just grown up that way. And to me that is that is really important. So every now and then we just need to remind ourselves of what really matters in life. And sometimes we get sidetracked I think we all do, I did. And then some something or someone needs to rein us back in. It can be a family member, an outsider, or somebody just makes a comment somewhere and then you You’ll begin to realise Well, what are my priorities, and most people that I have run across, I’m not sure of that same for you that that are not peaceful and are always looking for the next thing. They don’t really know what their purposes. And if you don’t know your purpose, then you are, you’re always looking. And of course, then you have to check your phone all the time. You cannot pay attention to the person in front of you, because maybe that next best thing is going to walk right by your table and you missed it. So as long as you don’t know what your purpose is your true authentic sole purpose. I think we can’t be quite as peaceful.
David Ralph [9:42]
Well, I think that’s a key point that you’re making, but it’s it’s one of the things that I buy into totally know your thing. Know the thing that you should be here so that you can focus in on what brings that to fruition. But of course, so many people out there and it’s not even so many people. It’s literally you know, the Majority of the world by they don’t know their thing. And they are attracted by the shiny objects, the new thing that comes along, and they will pivot, and I will pivot and I will pivot. Now you seem to be somebody that is quite open that you found your thing. You’re a historian, but you’ve taken it further, and you’re a historian that is helping people to actually change their lives to when did that come about? When did the two come together? Because that’s hugely powerful, isn’t it?
Dr. Natalie Forest [10:29]
It is, and the funny thing is that I was probably always mentoring and guiding people. I mean, even when I was a little child, I did that, you know, so that that mentoring or coaching or consulting has always been part of my life, which is why I always knew that I was going to be a teacher. I mean, I was teeny tiny. I knew I was going to be a teacher. And then I went through the stages of you know what What kind of teaching am I going to do? Am I talking about being a teacher? Like a coach, a teacher, in elementary school in high school in college? Where was I going to teach people? So in that sense, I was still looking. But I also was always drawn. And I don’t think there’s anything that I can pinpoint on how or why I was always drawn to history. And so the two just started connecting. And I very vividly remember, after having gone through my own little stages of patterns of trying to fit into society and all of that good stuff, which we can talk about later. I remember being in a classroom one time teaching a class and it suddenly dawned on me that yes, the topic was history. The topic was Native American history. But as I really looked into the eyes of my students, I realised that what I was doing And as I was teaching them about life about letting go of all of the pressures that they face every single day, and just allowing themselves to respect and honour their own desires, so I was, in a sense teaching them survival skills and the next level after that life skills to make their own lives happen.
David Ralph [12:28]
And I wasn’t gonna just jump in what was it was it was it a total epiphany when that happened? Did you like smack your forehead and think, Oh, my God, I can now see my future, or was it just a kind of nagging awareness?
Dr. Natalie Forest [12:41]
I think it was a mix. On the one hand, I realised it was more like an epiphany in one sense, but it also came at the back end of me having done a lot of work on myself. So it was a normal transition on the one hand, but it Hit me still. And then everything after that just started changing. And it still took a while, right? I mean, we can’t just change overnight that that just doesn’t happen because there are too many things that we’re used to. But it hit me even though it came, in another sense gradually. I don’t know if that makes sense. But it was it was a both mixed. And from that point on, when I acknowledged it, this is what I do. Then I had that starting point of looking all around, you know, we talked about patterns. That’s what I looked and said, Okay, hold on a second. I’ve been doing this all my life. I’ve been doing this in the classroom all my life. I’ve been doing that with other people all my life. So I’ve always been a teacher. I’ve always been a mentor. I’ve always been a coach. And now I realised that I needed to take it to the next level. That was really I guess, the epiphany that came at that point.
David Ralph [13:56]
Are you a very structured and organised person because the people that I know that are very into patterns and kind of structure. They’re somebody that likes their pens to be in the right order, and they like their computers to be lined up and you that kind of person as well.
Dr. Natalie Forest [14:14]
Well, um, how do I best answer that? Let me think I’m glad you’re not looking at my office right now. Because some people would say it looks like a grenade came into my office. So the honest answer is, on the one hand, I’m very organised and structured. I don’t I always say it’s my German background. I mean, I want to know what is next and I’m very good. Just doing that right now helping people plan programmes and I and I see number 123. But for myself, I’m also very spiritual because my mind connects and that’s why I love the title of your show, connects all the dots that I see in front of me very quickly. Intuitively, so too many people, my desk would look like a chaos, but I know exactly where everything is. So I’m this weird mix of, of a very well organised historian who needs to have all the analysis and all the facts in place. And then I’m also this other person, spiritual, flexible, you know, doing things last moment just because I feel like it.
David Ralph [15:28]
So so if we took you right back in time, as we were saying in the introduction, you you grew up in Germany, and now you’re you’re in America, may we land Baltimore area? What was the movement across to America? Did you decide were you taken by your parents?
Dr. Natalie Forest [15:46]
No, I actually made that decision. Growing up. I was very lucky and very fortunate. The way that my mother raised my brother and I because she wanted us to be over minded, tolerant and to go and live wherever we want it, which, you know, sometimes she regrets now because we’re far away. But there were two places that my heart felt I should live in. One was Italy, and one was the US. And my research and history led me. And you know whether you want to call it divine intervention where coincidences, everything in my studies that was not related to the US was always cancelled. So in that sense, I was then destined were meant to come to the US. And I stayed, even though I dream of going back to Europe.
David Ralph [16:45]
Well, it strikes me as an irony, and this is one of these comments, but I’m gonna say but I’m glad I’m in the United Kingdom when I say it, because the Americans will hate me. But you’ve gone from you. That is kind of Hundreds and hundreds and thousands of years of history to America, which is about 200 years that there’s there’s not an awful lot that you to study is it over there?
Dr. Natalie Forest [17:10]
That is true. That is true. However, what there is to study is the something that is very, very new. And that’s the human side of all these people coming together, trying to create a utopia. And the experiment of the United States, which I believe is still ongoing, is really amazing to watch. And I always go back to my European roots. And when somebody says, Well, back when we did I laugh, and I said, Yeah, you know, Europe is sort of like your grandparent. So you just try it out a little more. So there’s something very unique about this country, which makes it interesting to study and just to observe. You know, I always studied the 20th century, pretty much in my work. But in that I was always led back to ancient Egypt to, you know, Confucius and the Chinese dynasties. And it all comes together here as an experiment. It’s really an ongoing experiment.
David Ralph [18:21]
Because when I was doing my research for you, you kind of broke down my mindset since I was a kid. But I remember having a very boring history teacher, and she had terrible bad breath as well. So the boringness and the bad breath just kind of killed it for me. And I used to say what is the point what is the point and, and my one of my key streams, there’s a thing called Strength Finders 2.0 where you can do a test to see your number one strengths and stuff and mine is futuristic, so I’m as far away from wanting to delve into history as you could possibly get. But when I’m Doing the introduction and reading about you. It was the first time I actually thought, yes, this makes sense by looking back and seeing the common trends, the patterns, we can actually see why things were occurring and nip that in the bud to somehow. Was that always something that you was aware of? Or once again, did you just sort of come to him being or hang on? If I could apply this to that? Why can’t apply it to humans?
Dr. Natalie Forest [19:28]
I think I was always aware of it. But being honest, I didn’t always apply to myself, because you just mentioned something very funny. That’s a futuristic thing. Whether you believe in signs or not, but I’m an Aquarius, and that means I’m a visionary. And I live that every day. So I’m a visionary. I see where humanity can go. And I in a sense, see myself just helping get us there a little faster, because we’ve been Really can and in that there’s, there’s so much drama that we create, you know, when it comes to politics and all that, and people love to panic about certain things. And I’m at this point in my life where I look at it and I go, well, let’s say, you know, there’s somebody talking about an impending war or something and I look at and I go, huh, seriously thinking, I don’t think either of these two leaders, this is gonna sound mean, really want to die. So I think it might just be a little bit of posturing plus looking at history is probably going to go this way. But part of what history then also helps us understand it’s, you’ve heard this term, right, we can push somebody’s button. Yeah, I mean, I can push my husband’s button my mom’s buttons, they can push my real easy because we’re just reacting right? And we see the exact same thing and politics. One person says what the next person goes to yellow alertly The next person goes to I don’t know, orange alert level. And when some political leader or any leader anywhere else in the world then says, hold office second, that’s when we’re starting to break the patterns. And people get frustrated with it, right? They’re like, Oh, why is he not standing up? Why is he not being strong about this? Well, he’s actually doing the right thing. He’s not allowing somebody else to push his buttons. And I think that is something that where, where I see the direct connection between history, politics and our human lives, because we make history. You making history every single day that you’re living, you may be impacting one person, you may be impacting millions. But by what you do right now, you’re making a historical impact. You’re leaving a footprint. So why not make that count?
David Ralph [21:55]
So So how does somebody out there one of the listeners who’s intrigued by the conversation and things. Yeah, I can see this, how do they actually start to look at their own personal history? Is it simply like we do on the show every day? Look back and join up the dots and try to find the trends? Or is it deeper than that?
Dr. Natalie Forest [22:15]
You can start very simple. And I usually try to try to let people start simple. Whether you use procedures that are very well known in coaching, you know, the wheel of life, and you just start trying to figure out how happy are you in all the different aspects in your life. And if they’re all over the place, and they are not balanced, then you want to work on getting it a little more balanced, because that is our human nature. We need a little bit of balance, we need to work but we also need to relax. And then one thing that I always like to do is that I like to talk about, you know, what is your stress level, and I start digging deeper and deeper with the questions up to the point where I say well Who’s responsible for your stress level? And the honest answer, I’m going to give it away has to be, I am. Because everybody else does what they do, I do what I do. But I am in control of my actions. And therefore I choose whether I act, or I react. And if I just react and somebody else is pushing my buttons, and that sort of is a way in. Now, having said that, there’s also a completely different way in which I just talked with there was somebody about about a week ago, and that is really, to start writing down a little list and it’s a little more time intensive in some ways to start writing a list of everybody that you know, in your life, especially your inner circle, what you’ve learned from them How you feel about them. And then I always see that as like an Excel table, so to speak, you know. And then on the other hand on the far right side, you write down what You have taught them. And that is a technique that has helped me enormously overcoming some of the growth opportunities in my life and really taking them to the next level because you see patterns coming up right there. And then once you realise I’ve always been doing in my instance, teaching, then you know, that’s your purpose. And once you realise that, you just need to find out well, what am I supposed to teach? So it’s very crucial to look at everybody in your life and yourself, and then start going out from there. I guess at the second one is a little more complex and getting started. So you need a little more of an intro to that. But there are so many ways that And we can get started. And everybody is at a different stage in their lives. Even though I have specific ways in which I like to get people started just like everybody else does. I always first look at the individual and see where are they right now? What is the best way to get you started? And then some people, as I’m sure, you know, they just go through it, they do it very quickly. And for others, it takes a little longer. And and that is fine. But getting started, I think, is the really crucial piece and we get sidetracked along the way to but it’s really I mean, for me, I can say for myself and for everybody that I have. I guess I want to use the term touched. I’ve seen that the start is the most important piece, and that therefore you have to find the right way to start for you. And then you start branching out from there.
David Ralph [25:57]
Well, let’s play some words and Ben sort of delve into this Because I’m fascinated how you you, you’ve got to this point, because obviously in all things you’ve got to go through a journey yourself to be out here, Ben teach what you’ve learned. This is Jim Carrey.
Jim Carrey [26:11]
My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [26:37]
So powerful words. Now with yourself. Dr. Natalie, the question that came up to me is, was the conservative route that Jim is talking about? His dad was about you, just simply being a teacher? Because if you love being a teacher and mentoring, and you loved history, why are you not just a history teacher that that seems to be the conservative group. So when did you get to that moment when you decided that you were actually going to do what you love you were going to take a risk on doing what you love, because what you’re doing now is a lot harder than going into school every day. And being a history teacher.
Dr. Natalie Forest [27:15]
I think I’ve always been a revolutionary even when I was a history teacher, because I never go into anything to do it the way somebody else did. You know, we have to use textbooks and that sort of thing, but even there, I was never that conservative. Having said that, I did do something very conservative. And and you know, I say that that is connected to, to social patterns. I did get married, and the first time around, which didn’t end so well. But I stayed in that marriage, because it was so For socially speaking, and financially speaking for way longer than I should have. So the conservative piece there would be I stayed there. Because it seemed to be the more appropriate choice before I was willing to admit that it was just over and it wasn’t going to work.
David Ralph [28:24]
So so it wasn’t your choice. As such, you were playing a role at that time you were playing the the happy wife, everything’s nice suburban house and all the kind of things that society almost says is what success is built around.
Dr. Natalie Forest [28:40]
Yes, but looking back, I will still say it’s a choice. It was probably it was definitely a subconscious choice for a while, but it was a choice and I made that choice every single day that I woke up.
David Ralph [28:55]
Did you find it fascinating though, when we’re having these conversations and you’re somebody about is so aware, but you are here to do your thing. And it’s you that’s going to create it. And it’s you that has the power to make those choices. But we don’t. And so many people will be listening to this and going, that’s how I feel. Now, Dr. Natalie say exactly what I feel, but I’m not going to do that. I’m going to hold back somehow. Did you see that time and time again?
Dr. Natalie Forest [29:26]
Yes. And I think it’s, I don’t believe in right and wrong anymore. I think it’s where somebody is, we can’t move to the next step of our journey until we are completely done with our current stage. And and what I mean by that is using the example of my first marriage, okay, I could not leave that marriage until number one, I realised it was over, and that I couldn’t save him and he couldn’t save me, and that we didn’t have anything to teach each other anymore. us, the real end came after that, when I knew that I was grateful for everything that happened in the marriage. So I’m using that example. Because unless we’re grateful and understand all the benefits that a situation or that an incident has brought us, we cannot move forward. And for some of us, you know, it takes a little longer for some of us, it takes a little more work. And some of us are also within a certain comfort level. There, there’s so much social pressure that usually comes from love of another person or other people. That keeps us in our comfort zone. But as we all know, in our own comfort zone, we can’t grow. And so it’s a choice and a lot of people are making the choice not to get out of their comfort zone. And that is their right that is Absolutely, they’re right. And if they want to stay where they are for now, sooner or later, they are going to move on. It’s just not their time right now.
David Ralph [31:09]
So so you’re very aware of that the good times and the bad times are all part of the journey. you’re grateful for both because the bad times teach you more, when the good times ever do.
Dr. Natalie Forest [31:22]
Absolutely. And, and it’s funny because, you know, the bad times, they’re most likely the ones that really teachers the good times we enjoy, but it’s the bad times where we begin to learn something where we learn our own strength, where we learn somebody else’s strength and looking back. We don’t always get taught the way we like. You know, I believe that we’re here to learn lessons. So I may prefer somebody for example, to teach me how to love by being a lovey w cuddly dad, or a husband, but maybe in order for me to learn about love, and the first step to love is self love. They actually have to be a very, very differently to me. They might not be lovey dovey not be cuddly, they might push me to the end where I actually have to take a stand for myself. And at that moment, where I take a stand for myself, all of a sudden, I love myself above and beyond anybody else. And that is through their supposedly bad or negative actions. What they have taught me, that is a huge gift if we really think about it.
David Ralph [32:43]
Well is by there, there’s that moment, isn’t it? A you almost being is this self love? Or am I being selfish?
Dr. Natalie Forest [32:50]
Yes. And that I believe, is actually socially conditioned training. Because you and I, we both know everybody always says well, you need Take care of him you need to help her you need to do this you need to do that. Well at some point, you are done with helping others because there’s no energy left in you it’s just like that that proverbial idea of have a glass of water at some point is empty. And then who are you going to help? If If I’m completely drained of energy, who can I help? So if I really want to help 1 million people, if I want to help them live their lives to their fullest then I have to take care of myself so that the energy that the water never drains out, because otherwise I’m not gonna be able to fulfil my purpose.
David Ralph [33:40]
Yeah, as I say to the wife, if the planes going down, that mask is going on me first. I’m always gonna look after myself and then I can support the rest of you. But now when that drops down from the ceiling, and I’d love to do but just as a joke just because I’ve never been in a plane Have you when those masks we’ve gone down and it must be terrifying. But as every time I’m on a plane, I think to myself, would it be amusing to just let one drop over my wife and see you see what happens?
Dr. Natalie Forest [34:09]
Yeah, I wonder that too sometimes, but I haven’t had it happen either.
David Ralph [34:13]
Now we got to find a pilot that can just press that one button above our partners chair. And so we can sit. Let’s see, just sit there laughing. So So what Where is your life going to now? How do you take this from an idea to an actual fully fledged business and income because I think that’s something that the listeners would like to know again, we hear these stories about how certain dots join up. But how do you actually go Yes, I can see this. This looks good. I’m going to make a living from it.
Dr. Natalie Forest [34:46]
There is no easy answer other than it only happens once you’re ready. And I know that sounds cliche, but it is true because I’ve been trying to branch out for Little for a few years, and I lost my way in between while I didn’t lose my way, that’s not the right word. But you know, I tried out different things. And then once I reconnected with what I really know, and what I’m really here to do, then all of a sudden, I found my mentor. I found opportunities. I mean, now people are calling me. It’s it’s a process. But unfortunately, it will not happen until internally, you are really, really ready. And then it can’t happen.
David Ralph [35:37]
And do you see that as wasted time? Or do you actually see you at once again, as part of the journey actually, you’re getting stronger at that point, where it’s not connecting somehow for you until suddenly, bang, it comes together.
Dr. Natalie Forest [35:52]
Oh, it’s all part of the journey. It’s funny that you say that because my mom was just asking me a couple of days ago, she said so I With some of the other things that you’ve done, you know, I’m so happy, it’s finally working. And I looked at her, but it’s all part of it. I mean, every single thing that I have done is now part of where I am, and is part of how I’m teaching how I’m consulting, how I’m speaking. It’s all part of it. It’s all part of me, because those are all aspects of me. And they have just finally, you know, join the dots come together in this in this in this completely human form. And I’m now ready to come out as as big. I don’t know, I’m using my hands as this big energy ball to just revolutionise the whole world. It’s just that time, you know, when you start putting things together, all of a sudden, they mash up and then they’re ready to explode.
David Ralph [36:51]
And then did your mom understand that when you said that to a dg, and I desperately want to do a German accent, but I’m not going to I kind of thought you were going to do it as well. But no, no, we’re, we’re we’re professionals. Dr. Natalie, that’s what we are. So well, when you said that to her. Did she go? Yeah, yeah, I can accept what you’re saying.
Dr. Natalie Forest [37:10]
Yes. Because Because I was able to explain it to her. And you know, in a sense, I guess you can say, I’ve been her mentor coach in some ways, as well. So she fully understood what I was saying, because I could lay it out to her, I could say, you know, this is what I did then. And this is how I’m doing it. Now. This is what I did two years ago. And this is how it influences me now. This is why a long time ago, I did pursue that PhD in history, which everybody would say can, you know, get you anywhere, but I needed to do it. And so it all comes together, just like in my personal life, and the first marriage. Me moving out. All of that had to come together so that now it’s like this. This This big pot of wizardry, which is just about ready that the soup is just about ready to be dished out.
David Ralph [38:07]
You like Harry Potter. You like that dude?
Yeah, German Harry Potter. Well, what a brilliant image though this. So so when we were talking a moment ago, you said, I kind of lost my way. No, no, it wasn’t really losing my way and you kind of went back on it. Why did you think that you did lose your way, but when you sort of reassessed it?
Dr. Natalie Forest [38:28]
Well, I always try to be very careful with the words that I use because so many words have have associations and connotations with it. And because I don’t really believe in right and wrong in the social socialise, sense anymore, losing your way sounds really bad. And I didn’t lose my way. I followed all of the different ideas and opportunities that were given to me. And you know, I had to try them out to see They weren’t working for me. And in that sense, I didn’t lose my way. But let’s just say I took a detour. And now I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. I talked about that a lot, you always exactly where you’re supposed to be. Sometimes we just don’t understand that because we want to be someplace else. But so losing my way is not the right term because of how I think people might perceive it. It’s really more of me taking a little detour, you know, seeing what else is out there. Before I was really completely in all parts of me, ready to go where I’m going.
David Ralph [39:39]
There’s probably some words but Oprah said, and he really sort of emphasises what we’re talking about here. But there’s it’s one step after another and there’s no wrong turns. It’s all part of the journey. This is Oprah.
Dr. Natalie Forest [39:50]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself, what is the next right move? not think about Oh, I got all of this stuff, what is the next right move? And then from that space, make the next right move, and the next right move, and not to be overwhelmed by it. Because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment, you know, you’re not defined by what somebody says, is a failure for you. Because failure is just there to point you in a different direction.
David Ralph [40:22]
It’s true, isn’t it? It’s so simple, but so powerful as well, that there’s no wrong turns. It’s just the journey as you say, you made a few detours. But by doing those detours, it gave you strength, it gave you knowledge that maybe you wouldn’t have gained otherwise, which you didn’t realise you needed until you came down the curve, and then suddenly, voila, yeah, that’s why I went that way. This is going to open that door and away you go again.
Dr. Natalie Forest [40:49]
Yeah, absolutely. And, and just like Oprah was hinting at, you know, failure. Failure is a term that that is put out, by Society, because you’re doing something that society has deemed right or wrong for the social setting that you’re in. You know, not everybody wants to be married at 22. But if you’re not, if you’re still single at 31, what are you being called, especially as a woman? Okay, so there are all these ideas, and then they make perfect sense because in a society you need to have certain guidelines. But not everybody is meant to be like that. And so just because some girls not married at 22 does not mean that she is a failure. It means that she’s figuring out if or who she wants to marry, and maybe she doesn’t want to marry and that’s okay too. But that is one of those things where failure to comply with what society deems to be acceptable and that is a pattern That I’m breaking through and I’m helping other people break through because it’s just not for everybody.
David Ralph [42:07]
Well, just your image goes against what society expects, you know, you’re a very attractive lady but you’re, you know, I don’t normally expect doctors to have red hair and wear leather. But I’d be quite shocked if I went into a doctor surgery. So it is that you once again going against what people expect.
Dr. Natalie Forest [42:28]
not consciously, and what I mean by that is when I was younger, my mom would know the age better. Whatever like 1213 that is when I bought my very first leather jacket and it was one of those biker jackets. It was it was back home and humble look, you know, it was it was self made. It was a very expensive jacket, but even then I like that leather jacket. Now since then. I’ve had it for a few years at one point and gets stolen. And I sort of drifted away from that doing the thing that I felt complied to do. And so what happened then is that after all of that, once I’ve found refound reconnected my purpose. The letters are natural. That’s me. I mean, I The next thing I want to do, and maybe a year or so, and I haven’t told my husband that is, I want to buy a motorbike.
David Ralph [43:27]
I have another baby or something, then what’s gonna happen?
Dr. Natalie Forest [43:34]
See, I just blew your mind.
David Ralph [43:37]
So you can get a motorbike, what kind of motorbike Are you going to get?
Dr. Natalie Forest [43:41]
Oh, I have to get a BMW.
David Ralph [43:45]
And then what is this escapism is this nonconformity is you know, once again, very attractive lady whizzing around on the motorbike. But you’ve got that Dr. In front of you. I don’t know many motorcycles. Riding doctors?
Dr. Natalie Forest [44:02]
Well, I think there are more than we think of. So what I do really comes from my soul. I, there are some things that I actually go in and I say, I’m just gonna do this to blow somebody’s mind. But on a regular day, I really don’t. I have just come in, we started the conversation like this. I’ve just come to a place in my life where I’m at peace with myself, and I want to do that I’m going to do it. It doesn’t matter what you think about it. It doesn’t matter. It’s me. I love to drive fast. I don’t do it often enough, because we have rules. And I have a small child, but I like it. I like to listen to loud music from time to time, but on the other hand, I also like my meditation music. So wherever my heart tells me to go, that’s what I do. It’s I am Just internally completely and entirely revolutionary, and I’m at peace with that at this point.
David Ralph [45:08]
I think this is brilliant. But you’re you’re you’re such a complex character, that when you’re talking, I’m thinking, what what angle should I go with next? Because there’s so many things that sort of pop out. But what why are you so happy where you are happy with yourself? But you like to blow other people’s minds? What What is that about? Why do you actually want to do that?
Dr. Natalie Forest [45:29]
Well, because I think people sometimes need a wake up call. It’s really that simple. If we’re doing the same thing over and over again, we get into a routine. And when we’re in a routine, we don’t see everything as clearly anymore. It’s like we’re on autopilot. So every now and then I think it’s just helpful to walk in someplace and it doesn’t have to be a huge thing. It can just be saying something differently than you’ve ever said it before. Or you know, wearing a skirt. That people look at you and go, Whoa, what’s that?
David Ralph [46:02]
I always do? Well, I’ll be, yeah. Oh, you do? Yeah.
Dr. Natalie Forest [46:07]
It’s just something to keep people on their toes that we are all complex beings, and that we all have our own inner desires. And and we don’t want to have to do I don’t have to dress the way that you want me to dress. I don’t have to say the things you want me to say, as long as I’m doing what I’m doing with love, and not to hurt anybody.
David Ralph [46:32]
I can I can understand this. But there’s still that key element to Why do you want to do this? I can see why you want to shake up the status quo. But why do you feel driven to actually do that? That, that that that is the key to this show. I think why? Why do you want to almost shock people the fact that you’re whizzing around and BMW, that’s not normal. And the fact they literally all the way through, you’ve been talking about society, and you’ve mentioned society may Be so like 15 times, but you go against that and you want to keep on pushing, pushing, pushing. Why it was was your childhood kind of quite contained you tell me about it what why why Dr. Natalie, I’m intrigued.
Dr. Natalie Forest [47:17]
I honestly, just a my, my childhood was free, very free. So there was no containment, any any containment is self imposed. Again, I think it’s just time that we understand that each person is an individual, that we acknowledge that and respect that. And that’s really what I’m what I’m working on and that’s what I would like people to understand. Once we understand that and once we allow everybody to be themselves fully. There’s going to be so much less stress so much less drama. And it’s just going to be you know, the happily ever after sort of thing. So that’s really what I aim for and what is the key to it. It’s just who I am there there’s there’s nothing in my whole life that that I can think of that I can pinpoint as this was the point where this started to happen now I’ve always done it my whole life. It’s just who I am. I was literally born this way.
David Ralph [48:24]
You were born in the levers that that’s that’s a bizarre birth.
Dr. Natalie Forest [48:28]
Well, well, I was born I was told I was born with red hair, flaming red hair. And apparently that was a surprise to my mother. So if that tells you anything, I was born a revolutionary.
David Ralph [48:41]
I think he’s it’s brilliant. But you are so on your game. You know exactly what you want. You’re not playing a role is the world can take it or leave it. This is who I am. I’m Dr. Natalie forest. And if you don’t like me even go on your way. And if you do like me back, that’s your community. And that’s what really powerful, isn’t it when when people stop trying to be vanilla, and just be themselves, that’s when the people that do like you and like your work. There’s huge loyalty there, isn’t there?
Dr. Natalie Forest [49:12]
Absolutely. And yeah, like I said before, I’ve done the other things too. So my whole life is really a journey and experiment and trying out all the different ways to come to the realisation that I cannot and I do not want to shake who I really am. And in that sense, I’m very fortunate again, with my husband, because he met me when I was still conforming a little more. I had already revolutionised enough but I was conforming a little more and and he’s okay with everything. It’s just like, I love you. I know your heart and that’s all that matters.
David Ralph [49:50]
He’s I don’t know why I’m even gonna ask this question, but, but is he slightly worried about what’s going to be the doctor Natalie forest in five years time Because it’s almost I know you’re contained. You’re, you’re happy with yourself. But when you get so happy with yourself, you’re constantly pushing on you, you’re constantly pushing. I know that because that’s exactly where I am. So I know I know what you’re like. And I know that my, my version in five years time, he’s going to be totally different than what I am now. And some people will like that and be with me for the journey. It’s like, we’re like Doctor Who, you know, have Doctor Who. So yes, he loves that show.
Yes. And you’re a doctor. You see, that’s what he’s done. He, he’s gone straight through it. But it’s the same essence but as a different person. It moves on, it moves on moves on and I feel I am very much like that. I can look back and say, I was bad doctor, and then I’ve moved on to this doctor and I’ve moved on. So So does it. Does he look at it with excitement, or does he go Oh, but godsake I wonder what I’m going to be living within five years.
Dr. Natalie Forest [50:54]
No, that’s that’s the most amazing thing. He is completely excited and He can’t wait. You can’t wait. And he didn’t know this 100% when he met me, you knew there was something weird about me, I’m sure. But it wasn’t like, it looked that we would take this step and and he is, I mean, 1,000% behind it, and because you need somebody also, when I do my thing, you know, whether it’s being made with our daughter or some, I need the support as well. So I need to be able to come home and even though I do the mommy thing and the housewife thing, because that’s also who I am. You know, it helps me to know that if I go out there, that he’s got my daughter, he’s got our daughter, he’s taking care of it. It’s all good. I can come home and I can lay down in bed if I want to. So he’s giving me that that that comfort as well. And if anything, and you know he’s more excited than I am, because with me being where I am now. There’s that inner peace every now and then it gets a little you know, wow. I can’t believe it. But then within a second, that piece comes in again. So I’m no longer that excited about it because I’m on a mission, you know, and every single day I’m grateful for it, but it’s not like I’m going. Wow. In the sense of the excitement of Uh huh, maybe more, more not evil surprise person. I’m grateful and excited every day, but not in in the way that he is.
David Ralph [52:27]
I love the fact but even every other day you go, wow. Because that’s what life is all about, isn’t it?
Dr. Natalie Forest [52:34]
Yes, it is. Absolutely.
David Ralph [52:36]
Well, let’s play the theme of the show. We’re getting near the end of the show now, but this is the words of Steve Jobs. And we like to throw this in the mix. And this is why we called the whole show, Join Up Dots. This is what he said.
Steve Jobs [52:47]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college, but it was very, very clear looking backwards. 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward. You can only Connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [53:22]
So does it make all the difference?
Dr. Natalie Forest [53:25]
Absolutely, it does. Because otherwise you remain in your comfort zone. So you need to have that trust and we can never see 100% what the future holds for us. That’s why we need a mentor. That’s why I have a mentor. I have the best mentor in the world. I think she sees more of where I’m going than I do sometimes. But I’m at peace with that internally and I completely trust her as well so I know where it’s going to lead. But if you had asked me even just two years ago, I would have never been as confident as I am now. So we can’t he’s absolutely right. And if we don’t have that trust, we’re not going to jump off that cliff and trust that parachute is going open. We just won’t.
David Ralph [54:13]
So So what is your big dog? When you look back on your life? What What is the one that you’ve gone? Yes. Yeah, that that’s it that that was the moment when it started coming together.
Dr. Natalie Forest [54:24]
When I had a conversation with an acquaintance, and I had realised that the way that I was phrasing, my motto, and my slogan, this was about a year and a half ago, for the business sounded great, but my heart wasn’t in it. And so I had a conversation with an acquaintance about that. And I say, you know, that’s all really cool. And I know I can do that. That was never the question, but it’s just, it doesn’t excite me. I don’t I don’t get up in the morning going, woohoo. I can do this. And that’s when she said, Well, you are a historian by trade. So, what did you study? And what do you teach? And that’s, that’s when it came together. And about two days after that conversation, I was driving a long drive, you know how the US is you always have to drive you always have to drive. So I was driving a very long drive. And after I hung up, I was still thinking about it. And two days after that, I called the person who is now my mentor, and she agreed to work with me. And that’s when it all started to come together.
David Ralph [55:31]
And it was it that you had just made a decision, or was it the case that you chose the right mentor?
Dr. Natalie Forest [55:39]
It was both it was that I had realised that all of the other opportunities that I had looked at were good ones, but were not for me. And having had that conversation of Who are you really just having somebody asset, seemingly simple question, and me giving an intuitive answer from my gut. Hearing that other person say, yeah. So where are you going with all this other stuff that made all the difference. And then then I made a decision. And that is, you know what, that is something that Napoleon Hill, Ziegler, and all the bright business leaders also talk about, you have to make a decision. You can make a decision every day. But once you have made the decision, that’s, that is in connection with your sole purpose. That’s when everything is going to come together. And that’s exactly what happened.
David Ralph [56:32]
There you go, listeners, that’s what you need to do. You need to really love start loving yourself and really focus in on what makes you happy and then make a decision. And once you make a decision, and I can justify this, but it just kind of starts happening somehow. But there’s a lot of hard work that is not easy. And there’s a lot of wrong turns and detours as we’ve been talking about. But as long as you keep going forward, you’ll get to the right point. And that was My point is being evidence by Dr. Natalie forest, who’s doing such great stuff and you’re loving your life, aren’t you?
Dr. Natalie Forest [57:07]
Absolutely. And I’m gonna love my life tomorrow and in a month and it’ll be different. So it’s all about change and accepting where you’re going.
David Ralph [57:15]
There we go back to the doctor who metaphor that’s the greatest metaphor I’ve ever created in my life. I don’t know why I’d never thought of it before. Well, this is the end of the show. And this is the part that we call the Sermon on the mic when we send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could go back in time and speak to the young Dr. Natalie or before she was adopted, Natalie, what age would you choose and what advice would you give? Well, we’re gonna find out because I’m going to play the theme tune and when it fades you out. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Dr. Natalie Forest [58:08]
Well, hello there. I’m your older self and you are right now, about eight, nine years old. I wanted to stop by I wanted to stop by, because I want to encourage you. You used to have a nickname should not lie. And what that meant was that you love to talk, you love to chat, and that has changed. That has changed. And sometimes you look like you’ve taken on all the burdens of the world. So I want to tell you, let go, it doesn’t matter. You want to save millions of lives, you know that. You’re going to make an impact you touch a life every single day. So forget about burdens. Just look up at the sky. identify some of those beautiful Clouds, what do you see? What do you want to do? Because you know what in your heart, you won’t fly. I want you to stop worrying about how I want you just stop worrying about who might not like you flying. Because once you fly, everybody’s going to be flying with you and those who don’t. They’re just not ready. So follow your gut, follow your instinct, you are on the right track. You are perfect. You’re on the right track to where you need to go. Forget about everybody else. They’re great people. But the only person that really matters is you. Otherwise, guess what can make a difference. To start talking again. Don’t shut up anymore. Just start talking come out of your self imposed cloud and just start talking again because that’s the only way that you can do all that you’re here to do. Go flying go swimming and Create the vision that you see every night when you go to sleep. And every morning and you wake up. Just start creating it now.
And I’ll see you once we get there.
David Ralph [1:00:12]
Absolutely. She’ll be waiting for you. So how can our audience connect with you, Natalie?
Dr. Natalie Forest [1:00:18]
Oh, I am everywhere. My the easiest way is to go to my website, Natalie forest.com. But if you want to, I’m on Twitter. I’m on Facebook. I’m on Instagram, I’m on Pinterest. Like I said everywhere just type of Natalie forest, I’m sure you’ll find me. But if you have something that’s a little more personal, please write me an email. It’s very simple as well. Natalie, at life, hyphen transforming.com. And I tend to get to my emails once a day, but usually I respond at least within 48 hours. So if there’s a Anything on your mind, please don’t hesitate, I will try to give you the best advice I have or get you to people who can be of better service than I can.
David Ralph [1:01:09]
Great stuff well have over links on the show knows, Natalie, thank you so much for spending time with us today, joining up those dots and please come back again when you have more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the very best way to build our futures. Dr. Natalie forest Thank you so much.
Dr. Natalie Forest [1:01:28]
Thank you for joining the dots and I’m happy that ours connected as well today.
David Ralph [1:01:35]
Thanks for listening to today’s episode of Join Up Dots brought to you exclusively by podcast is mastery.com. The only resource that shows you how to create a show, build an income and still have time for the life that you love. Check out podcast is mastery.com.
Now David doesn’t want you to become a fated version of the brilliant self you are wants to become so he’s put together and I’m Guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.