Welcome to the Steve Jobs based Join Up Dots Podcast Interview with Honoree Corder
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Introducing Honoree Corder
She joined up her dots in her life, way back on episode 125, where she shared how she had found her thing in life and worked towards being a player-coach, entrepreneur, author, speaker, and mentor to professionals around the world, helping them grow their businesses and live amazing lives.
She empowers others to dream big and go for what they truly want.
At that time we spoke about releasing her latest book Vision to Reality: How Short Term Massive Action Equals Long Term Maximum Results where she taught her clients the way to an empowering future, by taking frequent and consistent action, as she has done not least moving eleven times to eleven different states in the USA through her life.
How The Dots Joined Up For Honoree
Now, Honoree has a new book out and its an interesting concept where she breaks down the rules of Business Dating.
By looking closely at how we operate within our processional and personal lives, and has drawn enlightening parallels between personal and professional dating.
She makes the case for why and how you should invest your time into building meaningful and long-lasting relationships with a select group of dynamic professionals.
Fostering these win-win relationships, which can yield gains greater than anything you could imagine, and it will be faster and easier than you think.
Well let’s bring onto the show to start joining up dots, as we discuss the words of Steve Jobs with the one and only Honoree Corder.
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Honoree Corder such as:
How Honoree Corder didn’t consider that she was an author until she had written a few books, and even then only did it to build her credibility.
How people underestimate the power of giving their work away for free, and building your loyal following by providing huge value.
How so many people still think that they have to close the deal at the very first time, which is prone to failure and rarely is good practice.
Why it is so important to assess when your knowledge should not be given out for free, and remember your time is fully your own to charge for.
Why it is so important to manage your own greatness, and draw a line in the sand, so people know what they can expect of you everyday.
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How To Connect With Honoree Corder
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Full Transcription Of Honoree Corder Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
Today’s show is brought to you by podcast is mastery.com, the premier online community teaching you to podcast like a pro. Check us out now at podcasters mastery.com.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:38]
Yes, hello, there is David Ralph. This is Join Up Dots and this is episode 347. And it’s one of those shows that I’m getting a few times now because the guest has asked to come back for more Yes, I don’t know why he wants to do it. She must be a classroom for punishment. But she’s gonna join a select band of guests who have appeared on the show more than once. Now. She joined up at the dots of her life way back on episode 125, where we shared how she found her thing in life and work towards being a player, coach, entrepreneur, author, speaker and mentor to professionals around the world, helping them grow their businesses and live amazing lives, she empowers others to dream big, and go for what they truly want. Now at time we spoke about her releasing her latest book, vision to reality how short term massive action equals long term maximum results, where she taught her clients the way to an empowering future by taking frequent and consistent action as she has done not least moving 11 times to 11 different states in the USA. Now she has a new book out and it’s an interesting concept where she breaks down the rules of business dating, no, not the hoity toity stuff that gets you into trouble. But this is the kind of business stuff by looking closely at how we operate women, our professional and personal lives. She’s drawn enlightening parallels between personal and professional dating. She makes the case for why and how you should invest your time into building meaningful and long lasting relationships with a select group of dynamic professionals fostering these Win Win relationships, which can yield gains greater than anything you could imagine. And it will be faster and easier than you think. So let’s not waste any more time and bring onto the show to join up more dots. And of course, discuss relationship building with the one and only other Honoree Corder. How are you?
Honoree Corder [2:23]
Fantastic. Thank you for having me back.
David Ralph [2:25]
It’s always nice to have a lady back on. And when I was when I was in the business world. I used to have to fight to get ladies in my life. But now I flocked to me I’m building the right kind of business relationships is that cutting to the chase is that’s what what is all about?
Honoree Corder [2:40]
I guess. Absolutely. Well, I couldn’t wait to come back on so you did something right. I don’t recall that being a glutton for punishment I didn’t think the first time was the first time around, as you would say was very painful at all.
David Ralph [2:52]
I could go many ways on that on a way. I have to remember that there’s children listening and I don’t want them to say Well, I told him about what I told him about. So. So you have been mightily busy Avenue because I was on Amazon the other day sort of looking around on your author page. And I was quite amazed at how many books you’re banging out. You are literally a author, a conveyor belt on you.
Honoree Corder [3:17]
I have a lot of words. You did.
David Ralph [3:22]
So So how many? How many have you got out now? I
Honoree Corder [3:25]
think I’m over 15.
David Ralph [3:27]
And do you come up with older ideas yourself? Or do you have sort of CO writers?
Honoree Corder [3:32]
You know what, I have had a couple of co authors that have come in on projects, but I write every single word myself, and I was actually kind of dismayed to discover that you can pay someone to do that. It’s like, wait a minute.
David Ralph [3:47]
That’s the thing. I guess you can Yes, that does annoy you actually because with the sort of world now of having virtual assistants and producers and you can literally create a big These days where you do hardly anything. It’s all delegated out as you’re in your office banging away at your keyboard writing these words and you see other people releasing book left, right and centre that you just know that I haven’t written. I just put the name on it. Does that does that annoy you?
Honoree Corder [4:16]
You know what it doesn’t Am I recently read a book and then got to talk to the ghostwriter. And I was really excited just to say, I was so excited to meet the person who had written the words actually written the words because the ghost writer is usually behind the scenes and you never know who they are and or even that the book was ghostwritten because usually, the name on the cover the author is the person you assume writes the word Yeah. But if anybody’s ever written a book, they just know that it takes us a substantial amount of time. It takes however much time you think it takes time A times about 40 to write the book. So you know if someone has a really big profile, and they own multiple companies and they have families Chances are they didn’t spend several months or years writing a book, they had help doing it. And what I’ve learned is that it’s the concept of the person whose names on the cover and then there’s someone who has that talent skill or ability to put those words down on paper, but it doesn’t bother me so much. It just it’s an inter it’s an interesting question, right that I get, do you write all of your own stuff? And at first I was like, Well, yeah, who else would write it? And I
David Ralph [5:26]
Have you always been a writer even when he was at school and stuff. Were you somebody that when when the English assignments were thrown out, yeah, I really get into that.
Honoree Corder [5:35]
No, not at all. I didn’t consider myself a writer until I had several books actually. Because it was I was writing books to give my coaching and speaking credibility. I wasn’t writing because I had to write now I’m writing because I have ideas for books. And honestly, I have concepts that I can’t share through my voice enough times there. I don’t have a platform big enough. help as many people as I can help by putting out a book. You know
David Ralph [6:03]
what you need, you need a podcast. That’s what you need. Get your voice out there globally.
Honoree Corder [6:09]
Well while you were doing the introduction, I won’t lie I not only went to podcasters mastery com I wrote it in my bullet journal so that I could look at it later to
David Ralph [6:18]
There you go, you’ll be one of our first signups and we’re, we’re, we’re with spend some special time together where we’re all over it. Yeah, we’re waiting to get in your voice now. Because it is isn’t it away from writing a book, but you pretty much spend your time you slave over it and it goes onto a shelf and people actually have to pick it up and read it. Whether we have a podcast, it is one of those things now but you can listen to it in the gym while you’re driving while you’re walking. There is so many more avenues. Do you feel that books have had their time or do you feel that podcasts are just having a phase? How do you feel about it?
Honoree Corder [6:57]
I think it’s it’s everything. It’s like saying Well, now that we have TV or we’re not going to have radio. So I think people still watch TV, but they watch it the same as they’ve always watched it, or they watch it a little differently. They DVR it. And then there’s the next level, which is Netflix, right? So you wait until the whole season is either available or has passed, and you can go and catch up on something. But when I’m in my car, it’s funny. I went on a road trip last week, and I had someone in my car and I said, What would you like to listen to? And he said, Well, what do you listen to? In the car? And I said, Well, it depends on who’s with me. And he said, Well, what if you’re by yourself? And I said, Well, I’m a nerd. So I listened to podcasts. We press
David Ralph [7:38]
the podcast. I know what a podcast was. Oh, sure.
Honoree Corder [7:41]
He has 101. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, he has one. So it was it was funny because if I’m in the car with my daughter, she wants to listen to music. If I’m in the car with my husband, we listen to the news. If I’m in the car by myself, I’m always listening to a podcast because I listened to probably 10 Different podcasts and so I have to listen to them on double speed. I’m listening when I’m doing the dishes and in the gym and in the car like you I mean I consume a lot of I mean in the morning when I’m, I even got a shower speaker David to from Amazon there’s something called a boom speaker water.
David Ralph [8:18]
yeah found out by this recently when people were telling me that I was sharing with me every morning.
Honoree Corder [8:24]
Yes. And you were like, Where’s this for me?
David Ralph [8:26]
Yeah. And it was fantastic. I was in there getting all soapy every morning.
Honoree Corder [8:31]
Yes, we weren’t getting you Sophie. We were just listening.
David Ralph [8:36]
You could push the fantasy you there just for a moment on away. Yeah.
Honoree Corder [8:40]
Well, I you know what, I remember that the kids were listening and my my cat is in the room with me. cats don’t care.
David Ralph [8:47]
But He’s unbelievable, isn’t it you can listen to stuff and not get electrocuted in the shower. I still don’t quite grasp how that works. But it’s one of those
Honoree Corder [9:00]
It gets, it’s absolutely worth it because I have like, I have my podcast rules. So when I’m in the shower, I listened to one of my author podcasts. And then when I’m actually out of the shower and getting ready, I listened to Spanish podcast because I’m learning Spanish. So that’s my way to check off the box of getting in a Spanish lesson every day.
David Ralph [9:19]
How do you get your ideas when for 15 books because I’m fascinated by the fact that you started writing to build up your credibility, and I see that time and time again. But now you consider yourself an author because you’ve got things to say. So how do you find the idea is when you couldn’t find them before?
Honoree Corder [9:41]
Well, I didn’t know I could find them before. It wasn’t until it was actually Mark Victor Hansen, who’s the co author of the chicken soup series said, Honey, everybody’s a coach and a speaker. If you want to have real credibility, you need to write a book and of course, I thought, How hard can that be? So but once I did it, then I had so I wrote my first book, which tall order. And then I actually was a single mom getting remarried. And I noticed that there was a certain expression that would come across someone’s face when they would find out I was a single mom. And it wasn’t like, right on. You’re a single mom, it was more like, Oh, I’m so sorry. And I thought I’m doing all right. And so where’s the book? Where’s the manual of empowerment for single moms. So I actually have a whole series for single moms. But even at that point, I didn’t consider myself an author. It wasn’t until I started, you know, kind of having the same conversations. And that’s where the ideas come from. When I have a conversation with you during a coaching session, and then with this person during a coaching session, and I’m having the same conversation, and I’m sharing the same information, I think, if one person has this challenge or needs the solution, and this person needs it, and this person needs it, then there are probably thousands that stand behind each one of them that could use that information.
David Ralph [10:56]
Well, that’s that’s my thing, isn’t it? It’s literally abundance. When you get that idea, then it’s the sky’s the limit, isn’t it? It’s just you overcoming that mindset of actually. Is it worthy or not?
Honoree Corder [11:08]
Exactly. Yes. Well, it depends on how many times I’ve had. Someone posed that question to me. So with vision to reality, it was I really want to coach with you, but I don’t, I don’t have the ability to afford you. I don’t have five or six people that want to go through coaching with me if they want to do the coaching model. And then after a while, I just think I don’t want to coach for ever so many people. gra, why don’t you just memorialise your ideas in a book and actually vision to reality was only meant to be the companion guide to the coaching for my clients. But when I was giving it to my clients, they actually encouraged me to release it. They said people can really benefit from this information, whether they’re coaching or they’re not coaching. So I added some additional neat, to provide context. But the new book business dating that’s the conversation I’m constantly having with people is How do I develop relationships with who? And how often do I talk to them? And what on earth do we talk about? And how do I know if they’re the right person? And I found myself repeating, repeating, repeating. So when you have that same question over and over again, like, how do I have a podcast? You go? Maybe, maybe I can provide a solution that would be helpful. But you wouldn’t write the book on podcasting, right. I mean, I could do a podcast, a podcast on podcast.
David Ralph [12:28]
Yeah, that’s the thing, isn’t it? Nowadays, you press record, and away you go. And you record videos, you record your voice, and the content is literally instantaneous. And writing a book, if I was going to write well, I had written a couple of books in my time, and they’ll novels and I’ve never never going to publish them, but they were just something to do. And I can understand sitting there writing a novel but actually writing a tutorial kind of bulk. I don’t see why you would do that. Now. Surely, it’s online. Just Just patch it up there and let people walk.
Honoree Corder [13:01]
Well, I think there’s a certain segment of people that still look for knowledge in book form. They still like to sit down and be in the words.
David Ralph [13:14]
Yeah, no, I agree with you. I’ve always got a book in bed. I always broke by the side of the bed which I read a couple of pages and men can’t remember any of it the next morning and it takes me forever in a day to get through. And I salute Barack Obama. I’ve been reading his book for about 15 years now. And I just keep on reading the same page over and over again and benefit Do you think I’ve read this before I’ll just can’t get through the thing. But yeah, now I’ve always got books sitting there and when I go on holiday, but don’t you think as life is moving on with the YouTube generation and and the fact that you can go to Netflix and everything is instantaneous and video, my kids for example, I would love them to read books, but they don’t. They don’t they just want to watch stuff.
Honoree Corder [14:00]
You know what, my daughter is the same way. But she still likes to read a good book in bed with me. And I think it’s because we’ve always read a book in bed. Like from the time she was born, I’ve been reading to her. So I just think I think everyone has a preference. And the good news is now if you don’t like to read it, or you don’t consider that you have the time to read, you can get an audiobook. So I have my books made into audiobooks for the people that are driving to work. You would be surprised how many people don’t know what a podcast is.
David Ralph [14:29]
I wouldn’t tell you but they, but they do know what an audiobook Yeah, I know exactly. But hardly anyone knows what a podcast is. I spend my life saying that I’m a chat show host now because people can’t grasp what a podcast is. And it’s just glazed look in their eyes. Really? And why should they really because one of the things that I find with this that causes people not concern, what’s the word that they just don’t understand it, I suppose is how you make money when you’re giving the content Wife and nothing. That’s that’s the big stumbling block. I get time and time again. But how are you making money? Do you? Do you have to pay for the podcast? No, no, we just throw them out for free. But how are you making money? And that’s that’s that’s the kind of mindset that the entrepreneurs grasp. But they the employees, don’t the employees, like receive a pay for something and there’s not a offshoot income because of a core function that you’re doing?
Honoree Corder [15:26]
Well, what’s interesting is, is people underestimate the value of creating a following and giving things away for free. Because then when you do have something, it’s interesting with every book that I launch, each book gets better in terms of sales for me and provides more sales to other books. Then the book before because I collect the readers, right? So there are some people that probably listen to your show and love your show and have told their friends and then every time you have a show, they’re like, Oh, I can’t wait to listen. I can’t wait till I get in the car in the morning so I can listen on the way to work or The tube or on the subway or whatever, you underestimate the building that following. And then when you say, Oh, I have this thing that you can buy, they’re like, great, I’ll buy anything that you sell
David Ralph [16:12]
is a key point to somebody out there like idea. And I always pose it as they’re in their cubicle, or they’re on the train, or they’re going to work and they’re doing a job that they don’t like. And they’re looking for that big idea that that big monolith of an idea that’s going to change the world. Is it better for them to think, how do I gain a following? Would that be an easier way of doing it? How to tap into people?
Honoree Corder [16:39]
Yes, absolutely. When someone calls me and says I want to do, let’s say, I’m involved in a project here, and it’s a co author, project. And many people want to be a co author in this series that I’m working on. And they’ll call me and say, I have an idea for a book and I’ll say, okay, there are two things you need to know and one of them is you have to To have a platform. So if you don’t have a following, you can’t even be considered to do it. So it’s if you have an idea in a cubicle and you want to turn it into something, the best time to start building your following was 20 years ago, your next best time is today. I mean, there are podcasts that were started in 2006, which is the same as 1974. I mean, it was so long ago, and yet those people started, nobody knew what a podcast is. A lot of people still don’t know. But people will say what’s the secret to having a successful podcast will start in 2006. But if you didn’t start it in 2006, and started today, build your following. And you and I both know being in the infopreneur business entrepreneur business, that having a list is everything being able to email out information to people who have opted into following you is key. So if you don’t have an account with an AWeber, or Infusionsoft, or Constant Contact, get a list and put up a blog. I mean, all of these things are They’re not free, you don’t have to pay for them with money you have to pay with. For them with you’re a much bigger resource, which is your time. But you can start to build a list of people who literally say, you, I like you and what you have to say I’m going to opt in to your words, I want to hear what you have to say, as often as you send something to my mailbox. Whenever you have something to purchase. I’m going to purchase it, you have those options now. And if you have an idea for later, start talking about not just that idea, but also what’s going on with you because people don’t just buy stuff, they buy the person.
David Ralph [18:37]
Well, I find I’ve got a list, obviously, and it’s quite a healthy list. And I’ll be honest, I hardly ever send an email out because I kind of feel that I’m interrupting their lives somewhat, you know, all my content comes out of my mouth. And the things I want to say seems to just come out on the show. So when I sit down to write an email, I kind of thing I don’t really know what to Sorry, that doesn’t sound a bit sleazy, really. So I hardly ever send out an email to people. But people keep saying, Oh, you should be doing it three times a week, you should be sending stuff out. And I think I haven’t got that much to say, I don’t know how you do that.
Honoree Corder [19:14]
I would, you know, I’d like there’s something here in I don’t know, if it’s always I’m guessing it’s everywhere. But there’s something called the skin th e S. KIMM. And it’s a breakdown of what happened in the news yesterday. And it shows up in your inbox every morning at about 6am my time in the in central us. And I love it because I don’t watch the news, the news, I don’t have time. And most of the time, it’s not happy. So right. I like watching all the problems of the world would give me anxiety. So I just read the skim and it basically tells you what’s happening in the US and around the world. And it’s very, it’s basically something that you can skim in about two minutes. And if you want to read the stories, they’re actually hyperlinks to all the story. So if you have half an hour, 20 minutes, whatever you can go in Read all the stories but you can get the gist of what’s happening. And then when someone says, oh, did you see how that plane crash? You can say, Yeah, I heard about that. Because you got to read it in the skin. Well, what they’ve started doing is like a weekly. Here’s what we here’s, you know, Monday, skim Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, you may want to just send out once a month, like, hey, in case you have you missed the show, here’s all the people I had on, because I know when I missed some podcasts, because I listened to so many. I’ll go back and look at who Yeah, was on the show and what the topics were, as I listened to a lot of author, podcast, but I don’t write fiction. And so knowing how to craft a good story isn’t really my gig. So I don’t need to listen to hours about how to craft a good story. But I do want to know about book marketing, and I want to know what’s trending and I want to know what Amazon is doing and you know, those types of things. So I would maybe just send out a little thing and say, Hey, if you don’t know what a podcast is, this is one
David Ralph [20:59]
you’re giving is a blue printer start something here. I think this is brilliant. So I’m going to delve into this a little bit more because what we’re saying to the people out there, but if you get an idea, it’s not going to be a new idea. It’s going to be an idea that’s already out there. So you can set up things like Google alerts to tell you when things are trending on Google. And you can use that to build your content com you you can send to him. I was talking to a chat the other day, and he’s going to come on the show because I’m fascinated by him and he is a captain jack Sparrow look alike. And he does a podcast called the Indy cars. And if you haven’t gone and listen to the IndyCar Series about Indiana Jones now, there’s only been five films, it’s five film four films. There’s been four films and there’s a gap of about 20 years between the last two and he does a weekly show. I think he’s done a 265 episodes and you think how can you do that? But he sets it up but the internet but Basically writes his content and when anything goes on about Harrison Ford or Steven Spielberg or whatever, it comes into his inbox, and it builds his show. Now for somebody who has got an idea out there, and he’s looking to build a loyal following, that loyal following can’t be bothered to do all that, can they. So that’s their, that’s their win win. That’s how they start building a relationship into their lives by providing those people with the content that they want, ie the stuff that is everywhere, but you just can’t be bothered to find it yourself.
Honoree Corder [22:32]
That’s right. And so if you are interested in a topic, there is someone who was also interested in that topic and they want to hear from you. And if you get them on your bandwagon, eventually they might be ready to engage with you in some way. Whatever that looks like.
David Ralph [22:47]
And then when people ask you this question about business dating and how to build up relationships, because when when you were saying the questions that people will ask you, I kind of fall Did I really need to know that because I never had a problem with building up relationships in offices, it was just something that I naturally did. And the fact that people are actually in that confined space, eight hours a day with these people and are actually asking how to build up relationships. I find that kind of sad in some ways, but they must be working such in a silo, but they’re not allowing any relationship to flourish and to grow, and they’re actually trying to force the issue instead of it naturally occurring. Where were you surprised by that?
Honoree Corder [23:30]
Well, what what I was addressing actually is building relationships in business, not just in your office, but with strategic partners. So my book addresses how do you find the person who has a business that complements yours so that you can trade referrals and referral business? And how do you develop relationships with people who want to purchase from you? So my book addresses that the people who go out into the world and are just Giving business cards to everyone and kind of trying to cram down the throats of the people that they meet what they’re selling, as opposed to attracting the business. They’re trying to force it.
David Ralph [24:11]
Yeah, but doesn’t I think it doesn’t start at home No, in in the office that they’re in, you learn both skills done you, you learn the fact that you can’t just walk up to somebody’s desk and throw a load of business cards at them and walk away. So it’s not going to work in the outside world is it is got, you got to learn the skills. Right? In the very beginning, I would have Oh,
Honoree Corder [24:31]
well, but in the office, if you are in sales, and everyone’s in sales, regardless of whether they do accounting, or they actually sell vacuum cleaners, or some kind of widget or service, they’re actually taught by their bosses to get out and sell, sell, sell clothes, clothes, clothes, and so they’re learning the bad actions right at home. And then they’re taking those actions out into the world and they’re very confused as to why they’re not getting more business, why they’re not attracting more business to them. Because they’re not only being told to do something that in my humble opinion is ineffective. They’re holding, they’re being told to do it faster. They’re being told to do it quickly. They’re being told to do it by the end of the month, and to get the numbers and to in and getting the numbers to me sounds very transactional versus engaging someone in a relationship which is relational. And to me, that’s the best. That’s the that’s the horn. I’m I’m playing. The song I’m singing is to build a relationship with someone. So what when you want something from them? Hey, can I come back on your show? They go, why would I not have you back on my show? It was great. As opposed to worst guests ever? Of course not tell them.
David Ralph [25:48]
I’ve had it. I’ve had a couple of guests. And there’s one guy Actually, no, I’m not gonna say it’s a guy is a person. So you might be having narrow it down. Who was so rude People keep asking me, I can’t stop mentioning this to other podcast is Oh, I had this person on my show once. And they were so rude. But halfway through I just said to them, sorry, I’m not doing this anymore if you’re rude, but I’m going to be rude and I just stopped the recording. And I know that my path is going to meet this person because it’s quite a small world in some ways. So it’s going to happen again. Now should should I in that sense, because this person was quite a big cheese. He was a large primarch in the world. Should I have just played the game? Because I might need him later on? Or is that not the way to actually build the relationship?
Honoree Corder [26:44]
No, I don’t think that you have to put up with bad behaviour. But I also don’t you know, you You did the right thing by saying you know what we’re kind of done here. I’m going to get up and walk away from this. You don’t have to call them out. Right? by name, you can use them as an example, I do that in my book, I talk about the worst first business date ever going.
David Ralph [27:07]
Honoree Corder [27:10]
um, you know what I went to a luncheon. And at the luncheon, the host of the luncheon was thanking various people that were important to him at the luncheon and I was called out as someone who was important. And after the meeting, there were several people that came up to me and said, who I’d like to get to know you better. And there was this guy who’s, who has a business partner who’s a woman, and he said, You know, my partner, and I want to get together with you. And I went and met him, them in their office, and they are in a profession where they office with other people that do the same profession, but they they aren’t all partners. They’re all independent brokers. And when I got there and actually been there was a little bit of a confusing place to find. And I made the mistake of saying, Oh, yeah, I’ve been here before I actually work with someone who is it? Well, my work is confidential my coaching business, unless someone identifies me as their coach, I don’t identify myself as someone’s coach. And so I wouldn’t tell them and they were calling me out. And they were, you know, just kind of asking me lots of questions and then saying, well, we’re not going to hire you because we have a coach, that someone else in the office pays for. But you know, we might introduce you to people. And so who do you know that we need to know? And I think you and I both would agree that I’m very protective of my network. For two reasons. One, I want to make really great introductions. I want someone to say Oh, and by the way, thank you so much for that introduction, as opposed to thanks for that introduction. Yeah. I don’t ever don’t ever make another introduction. I want to hear great things from the introduction. But I also have some pretty high level clients and they don’t want their time wasted. So I’m ready. I’m really kind of, I’m along the long, slow burn on the introductions because I want to make sure that every introduction to the best of my ability is is a good solid one. And so it takes more than just a first date for someone to get access to my Rolodex. And so they were very much it was very interesting because at the end of the meeting, they said, okay, and we’ve gone through your LinkedIn contacts. And here is a list and it was literally a typed out list for me to take with me, of people that they wanted me to introduce that I
David Ralph [29:34]
stole because I’m a LinkedIn stalkers.
Honoree Corder [29:38]
Well, but it was so presumptuous of them to say, here are the people we want you to make an introduction to, and I’m thinking to myself, I don’t even like you.
David Ralph [29:48]
Did you say that? I don’t ever did it.
Honoree Corder [29:54]
I you know, when I finished the meeting, I was in the process of writing this book at the time, and so I knew that universe had put me in the meeting on purpose, so I can write about it. So I don’t write fiction, right. So I don’t like put people in my book so they can die. There are people who have put in my book, when I see them doing something that’s ineffective. It’s like, and this is an example of what not to do. So this meeting was an example of what not to do. Don’t invite someone into your office, give them the third Inquisition and really trying to assume intimacy and that the relationship was further along than it was. And so I left the meeting. You know, they sent a follow up, email, it was so great to get to know you, and we can’t wait to see you again. I have never seen them again.
David Ralph [30:43]
And if you met them, would you just smile knowingly? Or would you just pull out a bit of paper from your pocket and sort of wavy in front of them?
Honoree Corder [30:53]
I would give them a copy of my book signing,
David Ralph [30:55]
signing the blood,
Unknown Speaker [30:58]
sign, copy CP Yeah,
Honoree Corder [31:01]
this is, you know, no, no, no, I wouldn’t I don’t do that because I think people are taught to do that that’s that’s kind of what I think the problem in society is, is we’re taught to go and close the sale during the first meeting. And if you look at statistics of any kind, sometimes it takes upwards of seven to 10 meetings before someone feels comfortable pulling the trigger. So if you have the buyer and the buyers best interests in mind, then you have to put aside what you’re being told the pressure, you’re getting to close the sale on the first deal. And you have to sit back and be willing to take the time that it takes to develop the relationship
David Ralph [31:41]
is key to everything, isn’t it? Islam, when you are creating an online platform, you know that no matter how much promotion you do, people are going to look and think it’s a scam, they’re gonna think it’s a waste of time or they’re not just going to put their hand in their pocket and give out the credit card. And so you’re not just going to put your hand in your pocket and give your contact details are you he takes, as you say it takes a while to build up that trust. And so I think, did you? Do you think that it’s by and large a thing of the past now? Or do you think that there are still herds of people in business land operating in that same way?
Honoree Corder [32:18]
I do. That’s why I wrote this book, because I have helped so many people one on one in with coaching, master this business relationship, building this business dating effectively so that they don’t have to continue to leave their office, they’ve developed mutually beneficial, long lasting relationships with people who for whom when they pick up the phone and call them, the person takes their phone call. And if they ask for something, the person on the other end of the phone is like, absolutely, I would be more than happy to help you.
David Ralph [32:49]
Well, why is it But why? Why haven’t we learned because it is obvious, isn’t it? You don’t go into a personal relationship and just grab hold of the first person and challenge your mom do so well. Why would you do in business? Maybe you would? I don’t know.
Honoree Corder [33:05]
Well, it depends on the type of relationship that you want. Right. So in the book, I’m drawing the correlations between business dating and personal dating. So everyone understands what a one night stand is. And everyone has seen a couple celebrate their golden 50th anniversary wedding anniversary. And we know the difference between those two relationships. And you wouldn’t go out to a bar and meet someone and take them home and then expect to wake up with them 50 years later, celebrating 50 years, it does happen. That’s the thing. But that’s what people are trying to do, I think on a pretty regular basis is they’re trying to have a one night stand with someone and yet still want to reap the rewards of a long term relationship. And you kind of have to pick one and yet sometimes, I there are times when I meet someone and I’m like, I can’t believe we haven’t known each other for 30 years you feel like someone I have known for a long time. But that is So rare. I get that a lot though I do that. Literally. I do too, but not not a lot in the overall scheme of how many people I meet, it happens to me pretty regularly. But probably for every 50 people I meet, I’ll meet someone who I just think, Oh my gosh, you are going in my lifetime.
David Ralph [34:19]
Isn’t that more about you, but you know, the skills are building up a relationship. So if it clicks somehow, then it’s really clicked big time.
Honoree Corder [34:31]
It may be so maybe so it’s like I was on a pod. I was on a podcast and I was talking to the host offline and I said, How are my podcast doing and he said, your pot. Your two appearances are the two most popular appearances on the show. And I said, Well, how many other people who appear on the show, promote their podcast regularly. You know, you’ve seen I have from my previous appearance when I was on, I still continue to promote that 200 episodes later and he said you No, it’s interesting. Nobody can say nobody in our audience promotes their show as much as you promoted yours. And I’m I said, Why? And I’m not saying that I’m better. I’m not saying that I’m not better. But I put the dots together, I’ve joined up the dots of getting people to listen to the podcast, because if you just tweet out one time, there, what four bajillion tweets a second, somebody might have missed it that really wanted to hear it or would have needed to hear it. So it’s skills plus intention plus actual action. Yeah, I
David Ralph [35:34]
think that’s a key point. Because I find that on the Big Show. I have guests who come on the show. They do a brilliant job, but actually promoting it. They don’t do anything at all. And I kind of think, Well, why would you not Why? Why have you given up an hour of your time to talk about yourself, build up links to your web profile or whatever, and ban not prote promote it in any way, but you see them I’ve done 300 70 shows now, and I would say probably 30% of people actually promote.
Honoree Corder [36:08]
Hmm. And I bet those are the 30% most popular. Yeah, absolutely. The most downloaded unless you have like, David Beckham on and then of course people are just going to download it because he already has that following which goes to our previous point of build a following
David Ralph [36:23]
Yeah. Well that’s it, isn’t it if you’ve got somebody that you are interested in, you know, I will always listen to interviews that Paul McCartney’s done because I’m fascinated with maca. And I like the fact that he’s kind of still just going, just keeps on going, going going. And lots of people are saying you gotta stop, you gotta stop, but he, he just loves it. And so he keeps on going. And I’m kind of fascinated by that spirit of the world is saying stop, but he’s speeding up somehow. And so I will listen to that. But other ones, I won’t I won’t even dip into him because I don’t just don’t recognise them all. I don’t attract me. So I think I think you’re absolutely right with that do you feel in your life? Do you feel where you are now? Is there a following that is waiting for your next publication? Are they increasing in sales every time you release?
Honoree Corder [37:14]
Yes. And so what’s so great is I actually decided for the first time I had not I’ve not done this particular strategy, but I’ve seen it be successful, where people put their books for pre release at a lower price. So I put business dating for sale on Amazon pre release and I’m being an Amazon exclusive having an exclusive relationship with Amazon for No, no, we’re exclusive for 90 days. I don’t know if we’re gonna stay married or not, but the time being Amazon is the 600 pound gorilla in terms of having a list and I wanted to you know, it’s a mutual use situation, right? Like I use them to get their list and they use me to make money and then we consider it a beautiful friendship. But I put it for 99 cents, and I I have a lot of pre orders of my new book, which is a great honour when you think of all the books that people could buy all of the books that are released on a daily basis. And I put it up 30 days before it’s released. And every day, I get a couple of pre orders, which is just just delights me. And I have people that I know pre ordered it. So I actually then sent it to them so they could be advanced readers. And that would not have happened 15 years ago, you know, 10 years, 12 years ago with my first book, right? I was basically having to say, Hi, it’s me, and I’m an author, and would you like to buy it? So interesting,
David Ralph [38:41]
though, I think he’s more your competence levels, isn’t it? You know, if we took you right back in time, which we did in the first show, and when you was the model, I think it was in New York, wasn’t it? You was up there, having your photograph taken. You didn’t believe really that you should be in that position. But now, you sound exactly that. This is my position. I’ve made this position. I love it. And people respond to that don’t know they respond to that that correct?
Honoree Corder [39:07]
Yes, I was saying that to someone earlier today that you have to take ownership of your greatness, Own your greatness and set healthy boundaries because someone was saying that they work all the time and that they don’t take vacation. Because what if they want to go away and someone needs, what they’re selling? And I said, Well, you have to set the expectation that you’re going to get back to people just not instantaneously. It would be helpful if you went on vacation, because then you might be happier in general in your life. And she said, You’re absolutely right. And I said, So when are you going to have a vacation? And she said, probably never. Because she’s too nice. She said, I’ve high score very high on people pleasing. So I think it’s not until we draw a line in the sand and say, here is my worth. This is the worth that I see for myself. And when you do that other people follow that They say you you teach people how to treat you as
David Ralph [40:02]
my boy. Yeah, you do you draw that line. But then you suddenly realise that you’re being sort of cramped because people have moved up behind you to the same line, because they feel comfortable that you’re leading the way somewhat. So you sort of reach over and with your foot, you sort of draw another line, and then you think that’s my position. And then you look around and I kind of follow you again, and I find that with myself, the more confident that I become, it seems the more followers I seem to get by, they embrace the fact that somebody is moving in a forward direction and they they’re following in the slipstream, somehow. It’s interesting how people do better. They don’t want to lead the way themselves, but they like other people to show them the path.
Honoree Corder [40:44]
Right. Well, and unfortunately, they’re not getting all of the juice out of life by doing that.
David Ralph [40:51]
You do believe that totally.
Honoree Corder [40:52]
So I encourage people. I do. I do. I think people like to be told what to do. That’s wonderful. But I think at some point you have to shift from being told to doing the telling this
David Ralph [41:05]
this play some words, but I know I didn’t play you when you were last on the show because he slipped in since then. But I’d like to see what you think of these these is Jim Carrey.
Jim Carrey [41:16]
My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [41:42]
Do you think that’s key to life? Now those words?
Honoree Corder [41:46]
Yes, I do. I’ve heard that before several times. And he is absolutely right. How many people die 1000 deaths doing the thing that they hate doing because they’re afraid to risk doing the thing that they love. Doing and on the other side of that really could be success. I have said and just a few minutes ago, I didn’t think I was an author until I had several books and someone actually pointed out to me that you could lead with that. You could lead with author, instead of saying almost apologetically, well, I’m a business coach. I’m a speaker. And I’ve written a couple of books like lead with author on that. And every time I say I’m an author, people go, what have you written? Where can I read it? And I usually have one in my purse or, you know, a box in my trunk. And I’ll say, Here, take a book. I hope you enjoy it. Which which topic would you like a book on, and I pass it out, and it starts these great conversations. But the more you let your light shine, the better you feel. And the more you encourage other people, and I know I’m stealing that from Mother Teresa and Marianne Williamson, but the more you own your greatness and let your light shine and get out into the world and do the thing that you love, the more you encourage other people to do the same because Because everyone is the same, and the person you’re listening to on the podcast or the speaker on the stage or the author of the book, they’re just people. They’re exactly the same as you they just done something that perhaps you haven’t done yet. So they’re no different than you. They’re no more special than you. But when you see them do it, aren’t you encouraged to do what they’re doing? Or to listen to their words and do the thing that you want to do? I would say yes. So if you can then turn around and do that for someone, that’s a pretty amazing feeling.
David Ralph [43:30]
And the thing that you really so Grace is but these people that are doing stuff, they’re just as scared as, as anyone else. And I was watching a documentary on Neil Diamond last night. And he was talking about when he played Glastonbury, which is the big festival in Britain every year and it’s the real sort of out in the field in the mud in the wellies and and i think Dolly Parton did it last year and the is the real is the place to go if you want to do it. He said that he’s never been so scared as he was when he walked out on that stage because it wasn’t his kind of audience. It was him pushing himself into a different area. He was asked, should I do it should on and he did it and he said, I absolutely loved every second of it. But when he was walking out on stage, to sing the same songs that he’d Sung 100,000 times before, he was terrified. And I thought, Isn’t that fantastic? But even somebody like Neil Diamond can be terrified of stepping into a slightly different environment. And that’s what it’s about, isn’t it? It’s about just moving forward subtly all the time.
Honoree Corder [44:38]
Yes, and I don’t know a person who doesn’t have a moment of do I actually have something to say. I was on stage with a dozen other speakers last week, and I was convinced I was the biggest loser of all of them, but not in the way that wins the show. Right? Like, I didn’t even want to talk really because I wanted to hear all of their other talks and yet when I was speaking and when I was done, they came up to me and said I was encouraged by your words. So very interesting. Everyone has that. I mean, Neil Diamond has it Sylvester Stallone has it. I’m sure Oprah has it every every single person I’ve ever worked with, eventually will kind of go open kimono with me like, share their real feelings and everyone has that inner voice of Am I enough? Are people going to love me? Easy scam? Yes.
David Ralph [45:26]
Starting or is it scary? Yeah. becoming successful.
Honoree Corder [45:33]
I don’t know which one would be scary. I do. To be honest with you. Because I think both of I think it’s all it’s relative. Who’s sicker? When you have a cold? Are you sick or am I sick or we both feel like we’re sick? So I think scared is you’re scared to start it and then when you become successful, you’re like, how did I get here? I have a lot of people that I work with that are thinking that they are the other Wizard of Oz right they think how did I ever get here? Am I am I really any good at this does this does this really was
David Ralph [46:07]
I’m more scared about the success which is amazing to me because when I started the show, I wanted to success big time. And now I’ve got the success of a white actually now I’m bit more comfortable with it is kinda got on a level playing field. But there was a while, but I could see the downloads going up and up and up and the emails coming to me and all that kind of stuff. And I was thinking, oh my god, I don’t know if I can keep up with this. What? What are people expecting, and expecting me to deliver better content every day because I don’t know if I can. Now actually, after a while you do deliver better content because you become naturally better anyway. And it’s just that one step after another step after another drip, drip drip that actually leads you forward but I had some really freaky evenings when I be laying there thinking oh my god, I got to do seven shows tomorrow. Not enough I can do this where six months beforehand. That’s all I wanted. That’s all I wanted to have these people lined up for me to do the show. I think the success I think that’s the scary. And once you get through that I think use all of you float a little bit before you go into the next scary so
Honoree Corder [47:17]
yes, I think you’re right. I think it’s you go up, you level out, you go up, you level out. I agree.
David Ralph [47:22]
I’m gonna play some words you mentioned earlier, but I’m probably not gonna play the Steve Jobs speech today because we did that the first time. But these these are words that really sort of emphasise what we were just saying a moment ago, this is Oprah.
Oprah Winfrey [47:35]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself, what is the next right move? not think about, Oh, I got all of this stuff. What is the next right move? And then from that space, make the next right move and the next right move and not to be overwhelmed by it because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment. You know, you’re not perfect. Fine Bye. What somebody says is a failure for you, because failure is just there to point you in a different direction
David Ralph [48:06]
spot on on me.
Honoree Corder [48:09]
Yes, absolutely. You just drive or take the next step. And then the next one, the next one, because honestly, you just don’t know what’s gonna happen if 10 years ago, someone would have said, in 10 years time, this is what your life would be like, I would have said, Hmm, I don’t think you’re right.
David Ralph [48:28]
What good way or bad way. If somebody said, you’re doing what you’re doing now, would you go Wow, that sounds amazing.
Honoree Corder [48:36]
Yes, Oh, sure. But it’s so much bigger than I could have imagined for myself. But all I did was take the next logical step and have the next logical conversation and develop the next level of myself. I do a lot of work on myself. I do the 98% in our preparation so that I can have the 2% outer success.
David Ralph [49:00]
GG think ultimately you’ve always been building relationships, that the fact that you, you know, you was the model and then you sort of moved on and you you moved 11 times now you’ve got to build relationships with neighbours and everything when you’re moving all that time, do you think that that has actually led you to where you are now, but that constant reinventing yourself somehow?
Honoree Corder [49:23]
Yes. And I think that I learned what worked and what didn’t work, because I can look back in each place and see where I didn’t put in the effort or I didn’t make the connection and where it didn’t work. And I can also, I still have friends from 20 and 30 years ago in places that I haven’t been to in 20 and 30 years. I haven’t been back to Hawaii for a dozen years. But I still have friends that I communicate with on a regular basis and in New York, and people that I lived in a city with and we both live in different places now and we’re still connected. And we’re still talking. And I think that that’s so important because sometimes you just need something like when I went to New York, a couple of years ago, I hadn’t been to New York, I went to work on vision to reality. And I hadn’t been there for quite a number of years, actually. And I ended up not getting as much writing done as I wanted to, because I spent a tremendous amount of time hanging out with my girlfriends that were still work. But it was because I had over the years stayed in touch with them. I picked up the phone a few times a year and checked in on him to see how they were doing. The interesting thing is, sometimes someone will call me after 10 years and go on array. You’ve written all these books, I want to write a book, How do I do it? Let me pick your brain. And it’s like, Do I know you?
David Ralph [50:46]
And then did you help them? do that? Do you feel that they’ve come to you?
Honoree Corder [50:52]
I, I do. I do. I do I have. I have the ability to help them and so I do the best that I can to help them. And because, in part because I have compassion and I want to help people, and in part because when I do something that someone would go, I haven’t heard from her for 10 years and she’s calling me for a big favour because it’s not a small it would be like me calling you and saying, could I just have a couple hours on the phone with you? And could you walk me through at no charge? How to start up and have an amazing podcast? Is that okay? Can I do that without offering to pay you or to compensate you in some way? It’s a true it’s a true. I don’t think people understand when they’re asking someone to do something that it’s a really big thing like I had someone asked me for coffee. And when his assistant called said, you know, he really wants to talk to you about working with you. And really when we got to coffee It was about he has a book coming out and he wanted me to walk him through for free. In the next hour or two. Can you just walk me through in the next Our to like how I would successfully publish a book. And I said, I’m absolutely happy to help you with that. That’s what I do. You can pay me for that number one. And number two, like what you’re asking me to help you do is not one small conversation. So just having the awareness now I have a lot of times where people will say, here’s my credit card, charge me whatever you want. And I’ll say, Oh, no, forget it. Let me just help you. It’s all where people are coming from.
David Ralph [52:27]
It’s interesting, isn’t it? Because I’m a great one. But if you tell me to do something, I’m not going to do it. If you ask me to do it, I’m gonna do it. And my, my sister in law, I’m if you’re listening to this, Jackie, this is a story about you. She phoned up one day and she said, David, we need you on Saturday. We’re moving. We need you to come out on Saturday to move the furniture. And I went really? And she went, yeah, can we have you ran here at nine o’clock on Saturday morning, and I went, why I can’t I’m not I’m not sure what I’m doing on Saturday morning. Actually. I think I might be a little bit busy. And then about half hour later, my brother phoned up who knows me obviously and said, David, could you do me a favour? I really need your help me. Would you be able to come out on Saturday and help? But yeah, no problem at all. And I was around there and I was all moving furniture and stuff. And it’s the same thing, isn’t it? When when somebody steps over that line and encroaches into what you think is acceptable, Ben, is just not right. I think I would have struggled with that conversation with the chap because I get it a lot. I get people asking for my help in podcasting. And more often than not, I still kind of give it away for free. I sort of say to them, yeah, you can do that. And I nip it in the bud. Now. Well, I’ve had some people that they would have an hour of my time and then another hour and by about the third hour I was thinking enough is enough here is just one way here. But I still find it difficult, I think to say, hang on, you gotta pay me for this, Mr.
Honoree Corder [53:55]
Well, it was only because of the attitude of the person that I was. was sitting in front of it was almost like okay, so I and I bought the coffee.
We got up to the, to the register, I was first in line. And so they said, What do you want? I said I would like, you know, a cappuccino or whatever. And I said, What would you like and I pull out my wallet and I pay so we not only let me pay, but then it was like art over then how long do you have? Do you have an hour to to kind of walk me through this? And I was like, um, you know what I absolutely can do that. And that is something I am paid to do. Because it was just that person. Now I’ve had that exact same conversation with other people where they’ve just been like, you know what, I know, I can’t afford you. I’ll pay you. You know, please let me pay you something. Let me do something for you. And I’m like, Ah, forget it like because I’m actually a big softy. But I don’t like it when people assume that they can just sit me down and start picking my brain about something. It’s just you know, it’s like it’s a very fine line. It’s very interesting. I just think it’s a lack of awareness on people’s part and I would never ask someone to do for free What they get paid to do,
David Ralph [55:01]
yeah, because what you’ve done, you’ve spent 20 years building up that knowledge, hour upon hour effort in the evening, investing in your time. That’s how you’ve got that knowledge is not like your YouTube and he can just press a couple of buttons and watch some videos.
Honoree Corder [55:16]
That’s right. That’s right and time you the time that I have the time because I charge for time in part in in some of what I do. That’s how I make money. So if you’re taking up that hour for free, then that prevents me from earning some money. And I wouldn’t have said to him, and I would guess he would never listen to this podcast, but I’m certainly not going to step out and say what he does so I’ll make something up. We’re going to make this trip later. So he’s never Yeah, he’s a stripper say is this. That would be great. But I would never call him up and say, I want to become a stripper. So can I just pick your brain? Or how about this? I’m having a party could you come over and strip for free.
David Ralph [55:59]
He might One that
Honoree Corder [56:01]
any more than I would call a well, but you know, he might like it. My girlfriends might like it, but my husband, my husband would be would be the one we’d have to just just get to simmer down. But I would never call my lawyer and say, I know I usually pay you to do contracts for me. But would you mind just cranking this one out for free? Right? How about my CPA? Would you mind doing my tie? I know tax season is coming up and you’re very busy, but I’m special. So can I get this for free? Because I think the dial tone would be this is a fascinating conversation
David Ralph [56:31]
is because we started off with saying, but you literally build loyalty and audience by giving your work away for free. And they were now saying no, you’re not giving away for free. There’s a time and a place isn’t there?
Honoree Corder [56:46]
Yes, there and that’s exactly it. There is a time and a place. It’s like what I’m trying to teach my daughter who’s 15 it’s like you never asked dad for the car when dad’s in a bad mood. Right? There’s a time and a place and I think there is a A bit of manners like I was raised that you don’t ever call someone after nine o’clock at night, you don’t call them before nine o’clock in the morning and you never call somebody on a Sunday. So even though times have changed, I still recognise that there is a too early or too late and an end and never crossed the line. And I think some people have forgotten that you can’t always get free instant gratification. But if you ask from a place of I mean, I went and did a $5,000 strategy session for someone I do a kind of a high level whiteboarding session, I did it for a girlfriend of mine and her husband, because they were on the brink. And she found out that I did it. And she said, you know, at some point, I’m gonna have to get that from you. And I said, How about Tuesday at nine o’clock, and she looked at me and she said, I just there’s no way that I can afford that. And I said, then I’m going to come over and here’s how you’re going to pay me. You’re going to give me $1 and then you’re going to tell everyone that it was awesome. And you’re going to say it was worth every dollar you spend And I was like, and you have to make me cappuccino and your fancy machine and she was like sold. And everything. I’ve gotten a thank you note, I’ve gotten fresh flowers. I’ve gotten other gifts of gratitude from her. That just because of the way she is with me that there was no way for me not to do it. You have to make it so that someone is compelled to give you their gifts. Not they feel obligated and irritated that you
David Ralph [58:27]
got and that that is a key thing. I want all the listeners to really focus on that last statement. What we’re saying that is there as a right way to ask is about building relationships is about you providing value to them, and then ultimately getting it back. People do that in one way you see on LinkedIn, don’t you where people just go by I never ever asked somebody to come on the show straight out. If I sort of cold cold room. It would always be to say, I like your work. Thank you very much. I’ve got this show. Hopefully you’ll find it interesting. I leave it with you. And more often than not, they will come back to me and then we take it forward. But I get it a lot when people just send it through to me going, I want you on the show. And here’s my booking in link, and we’ll speak soon. And I think where were we? What, why, why? Why?
Honoree Corder [59:20]
Now, why would I want to do that?
David Ralph [59:22]
very peculiar indeed. Well, I’ll tell you what is gonna be peculiar because I’m gonna do something now I’ve been sort of building up to it. I’ve been thinking, should I do this or not? I’m gonna send you back in time again, but I’m not going to send you back until the younger version, I’m gonna send you back. That might be the last six months or so to see how your life has changed. And what advice would you give to the younger you who was on the show back in Episode 125, so I’m going to play the theme tune and when it fades, this is a second time you come back in time, you’re out. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Sermon On The Mic [1:00:02]
We go with the best bit of the show.
Honoree Corder [1:00:19]
Well, Andre of six months ago, here’s my advice to you, you are about to embark on some changes in your life and in your business. And one of the things that you will be learning over the next few months is to really draw some lines in the sand and set some healthy boundaries and speak up for yourself. And another thing that you are going to learn so I suggest you learn it now instead of waiting, is to break things down into daily chewable chunks. And to remember that you don’t have to complete every single project and every single idea in a day what you must do is completely Those pieces of the projects every day, so just take a little bite out of the trunk every single day. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. And before you know it, the projects will be finished. Just don’t get overwhelmed. Just keep walking, keep keep typing, keep speaking. Keep working on it, and you will make the progress that you want to make.
David Ralph [1:01:20]
And so last question, we’re the last time we spoke to the how short term massive action equals long term maximum results. Is that still one of your focuses or did you move on to a new area and then a new area? Is it just building up into the massive version of you?
Honoree Corder [1:01:38]
It’s building up that just what you just said building up into the massive version, because I tend to get overwhelmed. When I I take on I took on a project recently and it’s stressed me out and I just finally realised over the last couple of days, wait a minute, you have to treat this like every other project. You have to just do it one bite at a time. Just Write the words just sit down and write the words every single day, just do one thing every single day. And those things build one upon the next. And so that I figured out, you know, Tony Robbins will say a negative emotion is an action signal, right? So stress, or overwhelm, or frustration, those are all action signals that something needs to change. And what’s the thing that needs to change? Is it me? Is it something I’m doing? Is it a way? Am I reacting? Am I being proactive? What’s the thing I need to think it through? And so for me, that’s been a big aha moment lately is, you know, because I have, the more I write, the more I want to write, the more I do, the more I want to do. And I feel like there are not enough hours in the day and so I have to go, Okay, this is what my day looks like. This is the hour that I have. And this is Yeah,
David Ralph [1:02:45]
I agree with you totally. It’s funny, we could go off into another episode on this subject, but unfortunately, we’ve come to the end. So the question is, how can our audience connect with you and of course, go and get business dating.
Honoree Corder [1:02:59]
So they You can get business dating on Amazon, amazon.com and amazon.co.uk.co.uk. So that’s where they can get it. And they can find out more about me on a record and I’m
David Ralph [1:03:15]
sure they will go over in their herds. I don’t know why aren’t my people always moving hurts but that’s what they do. Well, thank you so much for spending time with us today and joining those dots and please come back again when you have even more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the best way to build a futures on a thank you so much.
Honoree Corder [1:03:36]
Thank you so much.
David Ralph [1:03:40]
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