Welcome to the Steve Jobs based Join Up Dots Free Podcast Interview with J Massey
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Introducing J Massey
J Massey is todays guest joining us on Join Up Dots is one of those true American success stories.
The ones that you see in films and think “Really, is that possible”
Well as you will hear in todays show, it is possible to go from almost rock-bottom to astonishing success within six years.
All done by mainly changing his mind-set and going for gold everyday of his life.
Through a series of life altering events, including the serious illness of his then pregnant wife, an accident that left him with a punctured lung that excluded him from being able to
work, and even losing and squatting in their foreclosed family home, our guest learned quickly that he had to change his mindset if he wanted to survive and thrive.
How The Dots J0ined Up For Mr Massey
He immediately took action, immersing himself into intensive real estate investor training.
He hasn’t looked back and has built a booming investing business, using very little of his own cash or credit.
He now owns an impressive portfolio that includes over 300 units of residential and commercial properties as well as private notes and mortgages.
And I guess he is a lot happier than he could possibly hope to be too?
So is it a simple as changing your mind-set?
Is it as simple as taking consistent action everyday?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Mr J Massey
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Mr J Massey such as:
How he realises that the only reason that he is here today, is due to his faith and belief in God and the support that he feels all around him everyday.
How he is terrified of not ever meeting the person that we was distined to be, and realising that it was his duty to become that person.
How the fear of doing something far outweighs that actual act of confronting that fear head on every single time…..so go and be scared!
You will find out who he would want to play him in a film, Will Smith, Vin Diesel and Denzel Washington….deep questions!!
How To Connect With J Massey
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Full Transcription Of J Massey Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
Do you have a business that can’t get going or would love to create your own one that works whilst you sleep and is built around the things you love? Well, podcasters mastery is the place to go to learn the six simple steps to create a business that flourishes connecting with thousands of customers that tell you what products they want. podcasters mastery is the online route to business success. Check us out now. When we’re young,
we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling and Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:49]
Yes, hello, world and welcome to another edition of Join Up Dots. This is Episode 410. And we are going to deliver one of those kinds of American success. stories that you read about the ones that you see in films and thing. Really, is that possible? Well, as you were hearing today’s show, it is possible to go from almost rock bottom to astonishing success within six years all done by mainly changing his mindset and going for gold every day of his life through a series of life altering events, including the series on his hobbies when pregnant wife an accident that left him with a punctured lung that excluded him from being able to work and even losing and squatting in their foreclosed family home. Our guest learned quickly that he had to change his mindset if he wanted to survive and thrive. He immediately took action, immersing himself into intensive real estate investor training, and quite simply, he hasn’t looked back and has built a booming investing business using very little of his own cash or credit. He now owns an impressive portfolio that includes over 300 units of residential and commercial properties, as well as private notes and mortgages and I Guess he’s a lot happier than he could have possibly hoped to be too. So is it as simple as changing your mindset? Is it as simple as taking consistent action every day? Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up the dots with the one and only Mr. J. Massey. How are you J?
J Massey [2:17]
I am good. Glad to be here.
David Ralph [2:19]
It’s nice to have you here because we have both got those manly bacey deep voices that the ladies like me
Yeah, I guess so. Well, one of his eyes. I’m not gonna leave it up to you to decide. But um, I have you always had that voice as sort of like a small child. Have you sounded like Vin Diesel on steroids?
J Massey [2:40]
Well, no, that’s pretty funny. But when I was younger, I used to get confused with my mom a lot, especially on the phone. But obviously not so much anymore.
David Ralph [2:50]
Unless your mom had a very deep voice.
J Massey [2:53]
Yeah, that would be weird for her but no she did not.
David Ralph [2:58]
By ease is a great voice. Nice to have you could do those film things coming soon. Jurassic World.
J Massey [3:05]
Movie Trailer guy. Yeah,
David Ralph [3:06]
you know, perfect with it. So So what does the J stand for in your name? Because everywhere I’ve looked on the internet, he just says a J. Massey. So what does j stand for?
J Massey [3:17]
That’s right, because your data will remember it. Anyway, if you’re familiar with any of the Jacksons it actually stands for germane. However, very few people remember that after I’ve said it,
David Ralph [3:28]
didn’t need duty. I just want to take your clothes off song was it was that Jermaine Jackson? Am I thinking of that?
J Massey [3:34]
You know, I don’t know. And that’s unfortunate. If so,
David Ralph [3:38]
you’re too young. You’re too young for this kind of stuff. So So let’s start diving into your life because it is a fascinating one. It would be good to make a film out of this with potentially Denzel or Wendy’s or in the leads. It’s real American success story. Was it something that you look back on and think just mindset was the key. I put my myself in that position because of mindset, and I pulled myself out because of it.
J Massey [4:04]
Well, there’s a number of factors that go into everything that we’re talking about and that you know, when you want to look at my life or anyone’s accomplishments, first and foremost, it doesn’t happen in a vacuum or alone. I know that part of the reason or the major reason that I even am alive today is simply because I have a strong belief in God and in my church, and they’ve helped me through so many different challenges, support structure is huge. But at the end of the day, here’s what I know to be true, David, I have not met one person zero. I’ve never met anyone who woke up at the beginning of the day and said, You know what, I can’t wait until I can aim straight for the bottom. What that simply means is, you know, the the life that everyone is currently living as a result of their best, absolute best judgement. Their best decisions, they did the best they could. And it has landed you where you are today, man, if you don’t like that, learning to take responsibility for that, and learning how to change and improve and, and put, you know, odds better in your favour is what is absolutely necessary. And that’s what I say for myself. That’s what happened is my wife and I were willing to take responsibility in a way that allowed us to actually begin to see something different. We planted different seeds, and those different seeds started. Yeah, very much so with how we thought how we viewed things and how we went out there and packaged our value in the world compensated for it.
David Ralph [5:40]
It is amazing mindset. And I take your point totally, but nobody aims to hit bottom unless you’re a submarine commander or deep sea divers. I think that would be the way to do it. But when when you get that decision, what is the first action that you take because I get so many emails from people going on? In a crappy job, I’m in a crappy situation. There’s too many choices to make. What would be the first one to make David and I pretty much come back with just make one, you know? And if that’s not why and choose another one, but just go with it. Can you remember the first thing that you did? Did you set out a master plan? Or did you just do that one thing?
J Massey [6:20]
No. And that’s the thing. I was never the idea of being on a podcast or the radio or the stages that I’ve been on and all of that stuff was never something that I was like, Yeah, I can’t wait until I can do X, Y and Z. I was trying to feed my family. That was the goal. That’s still the goal. That was the intent. I wasn’t. I didn’t envision myself being able to, like I said to be on stage with Robert Kiyosaki and john assaraf. And know those individuals, have them know me and be able to now influence 10s of thousands, hundreds of thousands and millions of people that was not the goal. I just want to To eat. And one of the things that I think we all require is permission. We need permission to go out there and step into the greatness that I believe each one of us were born to be. And for me, that permission came through the emergency that we were in, I no longer had the luxury of, you know, I can do that later, I no longer said, you know, it’s no big deal. I am still going to eat and that’s one of the things that’s unfortunate today is that I believe comfort kills dreams. When you put someone in an uncomfortable situation, they’re going to do their best to become comfortable. And if you’re already in uncomfortable situations, you it’s really hard to get your psyche to say, you know what, let’s go be purposely uncomfortable and get comfortable again, but we’re already comfortable so no need to rock the boat. And unfortunately, from a financial perspective, you know, the world you know, currency and all The things that are going on, it requires us to be uncomfortable about the situation so that we can actually put forth the necessary energy to receive and see the outcome we’re looking for. I do agree with you.
David Ralph [8:14]
If you had gone back 400 episodes of Join Up Dots, I would have totally agreed with you. And I would have said, Yeah, comfort is the killer of all dreams. And I think we used to phrase it as the ultimate C word, comfort. That’s the that’s the one that kills all dreams. Now, I would say to you, I don’t think it is comfort. I think it’s the fear of losing what people have already got. And I think that’s the mindset shift that people need to make. They let the education system they’ve gone through university, whatever, they’ve got a job. They’ve gone up a couple of rungs on the ladder, and I think I’ve already got enough I can’t risk it. So I don’t know if I totally believe that it is comfort anymore. But I do think there’s a fear of letting go and going again.
J Massey [8:57]
Yeah, well, we’re saying the same thing. I’m just saying I was trying to be nice first before I
David Ralph [9:02]
don’t be nice. He does know for me I never I’m never nice on this show.
J Massey [9:06]
Because at the end of the day our fears when we’re afraid any excuse will do period, any excuse will do and we often grab the ones that our friends will justify first and easiest and the ones that we can collect all that social proof for is the one that we’re going to stick with. And the reason I say that it manifests itself in phrases of comfort is simply because that’s usually how we state it Oh man, I couldn’t dare risk that because you know I got a wife I got a kid I got this I got these other things and I couldn’t risk that I you know, things are too it’s stable. All right. It’s not too wise in all of those things are you know, great, nice to say. But the there’s no reason for you to play small you’ve had but one life, live it. Do that. The one thing I Don’t want to be, I don’t want to find out what I could have been. And that that that actually is a very uncomfortable thought to find out or to meet the person you could have been what if that happened? Oh my good Lord, I don’t want that. I want to be that person I could have been. And fortunately, you know, I, I’ve got a spouse and like I said, support structure and desire to, to do that regardless. And, and then in for a second, if I may. Let me just talk to a number of those of you who are parents, and this is the one of the things that really, really got my attention when I came to this realisation is I’ve got four children, you know, age 18, down to four. And one of the things that they always do is they take licence from us as parents, especially, you know, the human fathers, and they we tell them all the time, you would never tell your kid if your kid came to you with a dream and said, Mom Dad, I want to be XYZ you very rarely does the parent go, Oh no, that’s just not gonna happen, honey, you can do that. We always say things like, well, you can be whatever you want. You can go for it. Give it a try all those other things. I just never wanted my kids to be able to turn around and say, well, you say that dad, but you didn’t? Hmm. See, my kids can’t say that. Regardless of what happens. They can’t say, dad didn’t try. You know, nothing is promised forever. I mean it Go Go away tomorrow, but they still can’t say that didn’t try.
David Ralph [11:39]
So if we put you in a situation, obviously you’re rocking and rolling. You are a podcasting legend. You are a public speaker. You’ve got a few dollars in the bank, you’re doing very well for yourself. If I said to you, right, you’ve got a chance to double your happiness, double your money, double your success, but you also might not Lose the old again. Would you go for it?
J Massey [12:03]
Yeah, I’d have to. I’m no longer the person who’s willing to let fear hold them back from the possibility of what it is I was designed to do. And that’s what a lot of us do is we make an excuse, you know, we’re, we just make an excuse, you know, to go out and beat Like I said before, step into the greatness I think we were born to be
David Ralph [12:25]
so even if your wife was saying, Jermaine, Jermaine, I’m sure she’s cool she Jermaine, Jermaine, don’t don’t What are you doing? We’re all right we’re having nice holidays and everything’s good what that How are you doing? What you still go from? She wouldn’t say that.
J Massey [12:38]
She wouldn’t watch you It wouldn’t say that in fact it not now that now now maybe at the beginning she because she wasn’t always 100% on board and we had to go through that process to where I said you know that we just came to an agreement I was like honey look you cuz you know she’s got two degrees or families got a tonne of degrees, doctors, attorneys all I’m a college dropout. And I just asked him as I look, you don’t have to support me but just say nothing negative. Let’s just start there. And that that was enough to give me room to operate. And then what you do with that space is you go get what I call the the shut up check, you need a check large enough to shut up that little voice in the back of your head and the voice of your friends who keep asking you how’s that thing going? And when you’ve got that jack, suddenly all of those people become some of your biggest supporters.
David Ralph [13:42]
Well, we could you could use a shut up chat we call it the the the success vacuum, where at the beginning, you want a loneliest person in the world until you hit that tipping point and then suddenly you’ve got people coming around to you have a successful people and your support structure has changed totally. So how long Did he take before you got your shut up check?
J Massey [14:05]
Well, those two things don’t didn’t happen at the same time. And everyone who’s ever gotten this shut up check will tell you it took too long. Because it never comes fast enough or as fast as we think it should. The world in my opinion begins to move in your direction, the moment you decide you no longer happy with the standard you currently have. Period. So that can happen today for anyone listening. Now the time from that to the time you see the results. That’s a whole different story, depending on what it is you’re trying to accomplish and just more importantly, how intense and intense full you are about actually making that happen. In my case, it was you know, it was a while I often tell people that from the time that I started, you know, learning real estate and real estate techniques, strategies in live seminars, etc. I mean, I had done some online studying beforehand, but by the I was like in live seminars and ready to go from that time until the first you know check was approximately four months.
David Ralph [15:08]
That’s still quite quick though, isn’t it? Because I know doing this podcast I’ve set off on a path which I am not deviating from I get opportunities thrown at me and I Bash him away because they’re not part of what I’m doing. And I know that I fought myself okay, I launch a show I go seven days a week, build up an audience. Maybe in six months I’ll be making money from it to me a lot more longer than that once it does come and you’ve done it your way it starts to come very quickly and it almost becomes a Money Magnet. So I think for mums bear in mind that use old were squatting in a foreclosed family home it’s good isn’t it?
J Massey [15:45]
Well, it you know it at the you didn’t you got to live through it that the whole thing is that I didn’t know it was going to be four months. So that person in that situation. Yeah, you may hear for months. Okay. That’s not long but didn’t know it was going to be four months. I didn’t. So I was working, hoping it would be the next day, constantly. And for four months that day did not come, you know, so that it was just it’s just a matter of perspective, you know, had I known at the beginning I mean, in the human can endure virtually anything, so long as you know how long it’s going to last. Could you imagine if you went down to the movies, and they you didn’t you have an idea how many previews you’re going to see before they actually show the one you got there. But what if they just kept showing them? At what point would you go do? How long is the previews before you know you’re getting all upset and rowdy about the fact that you want to see your movie? We can’t endure much without knowing how long it’s going last. And that was the situation so yeah, in retrospect, sure. Four months is quick. In retrospect, have we done a lot of transactions a bit short period of time, more than some people doing in a career? Absolutely. I do it Understand that I, it is not something I am, you know, that misses me. I mean, all of the individuals in my industry tell me that I’m so young, I just got I mean, they just barely got started and all this other stuff. Okay, cool. That means I get a lot more influenced a lot more jobs to create a lot more clean, safe, affordable housing to provide and people to help and teach to learn how to do the same thing.
David Ralph [17:24]
And is that a key thing for you actually helping others? Is that where the true value comes? Do we all start as entrepreneurs as let’s make a buck, but then get to a point and start wanting to push back?
J Massey [17:38]
You know, probably to some degree, but I think one of the major things and this is something that I was taught a long time ago that I still find to be very true, is if you take the the route of being a solution provider, so simply find a problem and solve it and I don’t care in the problem, pick one, solve it, and then learn How to solve it for one person, if you can solve it for one, you could probably solve it for 1000. So long, there’s 1000 people that have it. And if you can solve it for 1000, then it’s you know, 10,000 once you know how to solve any problem, any problem for one person, everything else is a matter of learning how to scale. And that that’s where, you know, the entrepreneurship stuff comes in. It’s like really, really challenging to learn to scale just about anything. So for I know, for me that I was just trying to solve a problem. Like I said, I was just trying to eat that was my thought process. And then I can remember back to when we had about 117 units or so around that time, I was like, Man, what am I going to do? I was bored because I was like, I, it wasn’t about eating anymore. Yeah, it had to evolve past a need I had. And I was asking people, what was I going to do and what they do and Anyway, what came up for me Is that to help other people do the same thing. That’s literally what came up. I had some business mentors passed away. And I got concerned about what I would leave behind if I if that had been me. And sure my kids would inherit a, you know, some real estate and that’s wonderful and all, but I figured what was more valuable, or the lessons that I learned who had become the journey my wife and I had taken? So I set out to document it in a diary. And being the fact that we asked myself, what do we create? Will we create cash flow, that’s what we create. So that’s where cash flow diary comes from. And then a friend of mine said, Hey, I bet adults would want to know what you’re telling your kids. I’m like, Oh, good point. And that’s literally how it started because a guy approached me at a net working event. And he literally said to me, and I it was as elegant as this. If you Can’t believe it. He said, Will you teach me everything you know? And I said, Sure, but it’s gonna cost you a lot of money. And then we discussed that amount and I thought I was telling him an amount that nobody no sane human would ever pay. And it took him about three seconds. He goes, yes, we can do that. I’m like, did you go Damn,
David Ralph [20:23]
I should have done more. I should have a more
J Massey [20:25]
I searched it. I sure did. Because that’s the that’s the negotiator in me right there. I was like, Oh, my God. He said, Yes. That was it was literally in this order. It was like, Oh, my God. He said, Yeah,
David Ralph [20:34]
you could have gone God had my fingers crossed. I was only joking. And then gone
J Massey [20:38]
again. Right. I was I was trying to come up with a number that I thought was going to get him to leave me alone. That’s what I thought it was going to do. That was my expectation. And then I’m like, Well, I guess I’m doing this and then it went, dang, it could probably got more. Good.
David Ralph [20:57]
It’s a fascinating concept. This is an Because you start on a journey where you don’t know where you’re going to go, people get to that point of pain as you say, and they go, right, I’m gonna sort my life out, I’m going to do something. And if I do it the right way, they become an expert at something. And then it gets to that point, but their expert knowledge becomes easy to them. And they struggle to then provide a value and figure to others because hey, I can just do it easily, then surely everybody else can do it. Was that one of those dots on the Join Up Dots timeline that we talked about that you look back and go? Yeah, thank God. Thank God I undercharged for that, because that really pointed me in the right direction for the true value that I can offer. Yeah, well, yeah. I mean, it’s, it’s why you and I are even talking today is because I am not gonna buy you anything. I promise you. This is free.
J Massey [21:48]
No, the Agreed. Agreed. But that’s not the point. The point is, is that there’s somebody listening, and I know that and I’ve learned that, that there’s somebody listening right now who needs to need someone like it. needed someone to say you can do this, to say that it is possible whatever the it is is irrelevant. The point is inside you lies dormant. This, I dare I say this beast that is dying to come out. And unless somebody tells us often times, that that is in there in us, we dare not, dare not take it upon ourselves to say, I can make something happen, and that’s why I do my best to let people know, look, my wife could not eat or drink, I was unable to walk or talk, we were squatting in bank owned property. She had almost died a few times. All of these things were going on, on top of Oh, by the way, we don’t have a place to stay. And that’s where we started from. If you’re a person who had who can breathe today, because I was not able to walk and talk simultaneously without fainting. If you can breathe, if your spouse
is for all you know, going to be reasonably healthy today and you have a place to stay, you know where your next meal is coming from your head of where I started. And the simple thing, the simple and I put, you know, quotations around that word that in your way is simply how you’re viewing and looking at things. And once you learn to change the way you look at things, you change the way things look. And that’s what’s necessary for a lot of us to go out there. The world is begging, desperate for your leadership and your ideas to come to life. I mean, all you got to do is turn on the news and you see it. So let’s, you know, and that’s what I’ve learned. I’ve learned that there are people all across this globe. I mean, when I’ve gone to Estonia and Lithuania and in all these other places, I don’t care. There’s somebody who will go out there and do something simple because they heard this episode. Well, let’s bring on one have friends to the show. He’s always hanging around. And he’s got something profound to say. So this is Jim Carrey.
Jim Carrey [24:06]
My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [24:33]
J Massey [24:34]
David Ralph [24:37]
Now, the thing that I find fascinating on that, and I talk about this quite a lot, as well as my show, I do a lot of talking. But you can listen to it in different ways. And I was listening to it then and I heard the word survive. He did everything he could to survive. And that is a kind of ingrained concept, isn’t it but life’s got to be hard. You’ve got to go out and just get enough money to pay the bills and all that kind of stuff. Once you get past by is that when rocket speed really comes towards you when you realise actually, you don’t have to work hard You just have to work towards your talents, your skills, providing that solution to that one problem too many.
J Massey [25:21]
Yeah, and one of the things that you you must learn to do is continually add to your skills because as as nearly any podcaster would dare attach their first show. Their first episode is nothing like the one that they’re doing today. Because you know, you don’t know Is anybody gonna listen to me and what was yours different? Did you actually listen to yours now? No, I I can’t do it. He’s out. He’s out, baby. Yeah, yeah. Oh, it’s still there. It’s still there. And I apologise when people catch up with me in person or emails or whatever on the phone. It say, Hey, I listened to all of them. I’m like, Sorry. They’re like, No, no, it was good to hear you grow through that. I’m like, okay, glad you like it. Keep going.
David Ralph [26:09]
It’s nice when I say grow what I mean cuz God, you were crap.
J Massey [26:13]
You will be Yeah, pretty much pretty much pretty much it was like, man, how much more this Can I take but and that’s the thing we’re all growing or we’re dying period and most people, most people who are working for someone else and again there are some some people who that that’s what that’s your calling that’s what you should do and that’s great. But for the majority, that’s probably not the case. And most people say things like hey, I have 20 years experience doing this. No you don’t. You you’ve done the same thing for 20 years you Yeah, that’s true. You got one year experience repeated 20 times. That’s really what it comes down to. And as an entrepreneur, one of the things you must constantly be doing is innovating reinventing challenging, growing All of those things are required your customers require it to continue to be relevant and provide service requires it and that that’s what gives you the freedom to express your creativity and to grow. I mean, truth be told, I have naturally an introverted and shy person and speaking to people was not something I really get up and go, yeah, can’t wait to speak to thousands. That’s not
David Ralph [27:24]
so what did you do a bit? Why did you push through because you could have been quite happy, sitting in an office, doing real estate deals, making some money, why did you push yourself into that extra area?
J Massey [27:36]
You know, and I have to remind myself of that all the time, because it’s an it’s not about me, it’s there’s a mission. Like I said, I as I am, there’s a I, I know I just believe very strongly there’s a husband, as a father, as a friend as a wife. who’s counting on something to happen hoping something happens and they may not believe that it’s possible for them? Because I did not. I did not I didn’t think anything. I’m like, what’s going to rescue me? I was actually looking for a solution outside myself, somebody to come in and bail me out. And the Calvary wasn’t coming not in that form, not in that way. And and I just strongly believe that there’s a person out there who needs to hear it, period. I mean, I did not that, you know, that’s why I got up at this hour to make this happen.
David Ralph [28:37]
Well, I know this man’s mad really, this man’s mad he he’s, he hangs around with john McAfee can choose the time, Connie.
J Massey [28:45]
It will it. I could. But the mission is more important than that. You know, they’re the mission is more important. Does that make sense? And that does.
David Ralph [28:56]
Yeah. When it’s bigger than you. You You know, I use a phrase a lot. I feel like I’m a twig on the mighty stream of life. And I feel like I’m flowing towards something. And every now and again, I pick up a count. And it really sort of takes me off maybe where I think I’m going to go. But ultimately, I come back because I’m in that natural colon, but I can’t fight it. And the more I find it, the harder it becomes. So I just go with it and see what comes my way. And fortunately, I think when you do that, success comes your way because you are naturally going with a single path, the easiest route.
J Massey [29:32]
Right? And, and I, there’s more fun, there’s more excitement. It’s the difference between living life in black and white versus colour for me. And I didn’t know how I could contribute how I could make a difference. I didn’t know that. It’s not like there’s nothing in primary school elementary school university that ever teaches you, hey, if you combine all of these random talents of yours together, you could actually provide value to people that there’s no, there’s nothing that does that, that had to, you know, be developed through emergency and breaking of shales and Changing the way the world looks and was perceived. Until that happened. The guy who could provide something of value say something I didn’t know that I could teach things. I didn’t know that I didn’t know that about myself. I didn’t know that people would learn and listen and do and duplicate him. That’s the part that gets me excited. I mean, recently, in the past 12 months, I can claim influence on three individuals significant influence, I might add three individuals who are able to leave their job behind because of the concepts and techniques and strategies and I’m like, their lives have forever changed, period. And I was even if it was point 000 1% of that. I was there and that’s exciting to me to know that I, we can each become an agent of change. So let’s let’s go do that. That’s what gets me going. I want to see more husbands fathers, wives because nobody should have to. I stay stared my, I mean, if you’ve ever had your kids ask you, Daddy, what’s for dinner? And you don’t have an answer. You understand exactly what I’m talking about right now. Because you don’t want to see that happen. You don’t want to be that person. And I don’t want to be the guy who could have done something but did
David Ralph [31:41]
in my house. My kids never asked dad because I know he will cook something strange. They will always they will always get a mum. So I’m a dad who never hears that. I kind of I like to throw things together. So if we take you back in time to the young Jay Massey, well, what would he have wanted to be? What are you Be as astonished as perhaps you are actually you bet you are where you are today was he gonna be on a different path?
J Massey [32:09]
Yeah, that’s an understatement. I yeah, that’s an understatement. If you’ve ever called tech support I was in a what feels like a prior life. That guy on the other phone under in the phone, you know and no offence to tech support people but you guys know your tick usually not that great with people and not known for being personable in any way shape or form. So yeah, I was uh, yeah, I was when I was going to university I was a double major in electrical engineering and computer engineering technology. So there was there’s nothing about my background that would even hint at or suggest that what I’m doing today is what I what I’m doing,
David Ralph [32:53]
and what about even further back the sort of five year old or seven year old because that is the key essence of who we are as adults. We just lose it on the way which is the whole theme of the show joining up does you can track your pass and by tracking your dots, you actually build your future. So what would the will young you have been doing and he’s dreams?
J Massey [33:14]
I don’t see it. I mean, I don’t see it. I you know, that would be an interesting question for me to ask like my mom. Hey, mom when I was five, did you see like for See, could you have seen then what I do now?
David Ralph [33:28]
But you must have run home from school and done stuff. And what did you use? Lego
J Massey [33:36]
bro? I pro okay. I don’t know if anybody remembers a Commodore VIC 20.
David Ralph [33:41]
Yeah, that was my first one with a big thing that you whacked in the back.
J Massey [33:46]
Okay, all right. What I did is I ran home to go programme, the Commodore VIC 20. This was back when you stored your your programmes on a cassette tape. For those of you who might remember what that is. Yeah, that’s
David Ralph [33:59]
a You might not hope a screeching sound. Right? Yeah. When you loaded anything up, this is the greatest conversation known to man.
J Massey [34:08]
Yes. So that’s what I did. I went home to programme those things I didn’t I like I said, there’s there’s no clue in my background that says, uh, one day, this is what’s going to happen. I played video games, probably more than I should. But you know that that’s, that’s what I did. That’s what I enjoy and and there’s nothing that says I would be speaking to people there’s nothing that says I would be teaching people nothing that I am aware of that says any of those things.
David Ralph [34:42]
I bet if you asked your mom that she she’d say, Well, actually, you was always somebody who, blah blah, blah.
J Massey [34:49]
You know, I would you’re actually inspiring a question. I almost wish I could ring her up right now and say, Hey, wow, you know, I got a question for you. And we could all learn together, you know what she would have to say? I’ve got a question
David Ralph [35:02]
for you. What do I still think that um, you on the phone? that that would be a great question to ask your mom when? Yeah, that hasn’t happened in a while, but that would be funny. We’ve moved on from there. So how do you go from? Because it seems to me there’s three stages to your life. There’s a stage that didn’t believe there was a stage but hustled and flex the old hustle muscle to get it going, and then you achieved and then got bored, I suppose that four stages. So how do you go from that that boredom state because you see it time and time again where people win the lottery and they go, Oh, it’s gonna be amazing. And then six months later, they’re bored stupid. So when you put that much effort into getting somewhere and then you achieve it, how do you go again and reassess.
J Massey [35:51]
You have to find a cause a reason I think as human beings we are we are wired if you will, to have a reason will To live so to speak, what? That you know that whole meaning of life? What am I here for need a purpose? It’s easy to say the purpose is to eat. Everybody can relate to that. That one’s given to you. I’m trying to arrive. Okay, cool. Everyone’s like, yeah, I’m down for that too. I’d like to eat. The question is what happens once you get past that? And if you don’t come up with a, if you don’t come up with something, oftentimes, that’s when you do hear of people taking you know, negative terms, you know, too much drugs or over in indulgence in things that just are destructive habits. I think that’s literally what it is, is they’re just bored and they don’t have a purpose and they
David Ralph [36:41]
will go Justin Bieber. That’s what you’re saying.
J Massey [36:45]
Uh, sure, yes. Yeah. And there’s too many examples, but Sure, yeah. And and that’s what it comes down to. And like I said, for me, I was fortunate enough to come to the realisation that what really got me fired Going was realising I can help somebody I can make. Give me six, nine months with any person in a one on one coaching situation, they will be different, provided they are willing to change, they will be different. And I know that now and that’s exciting to me. So and when I realised that that that meant generations in that family tree would be different, that’s what got me excited. You know, I get a lot of joy out of helping Yeah, sure. We’re gonna go buy more property and do all those things that we still do. And that’s great. And I love providing the jobs that we provide clean, safe, affordable housing and blah, blah, blah. That’s great. In fact, we get a significant number of investors from the you know, UK who want to take advantage of us real estate, love all of those things. But nothing compares to showing someone who doesn’t believe that they can to getting them one of their first shut up checks. They go, oh my god, Jay, it’s exactly like you said I could do it. And that means now I can, you know, my kids can go to college or I can actually stop my husband can no longer no longer has to go to work. And man, do you? Do you understand it? And they love how they say that. Do you understand what this means for me and my family? And I’ve like it. Sometimes I’m like, No, no, no, Tell me Tell me more. When I’m really thinking, yeah, I have an idea. I have an idea. That’s why we’re doing this whole thing. And when we get those emails from people that tell us Hey, I got my first one done. I can’t believe it. I’ve never seen a check this large. This has never happened for me before. And I’m just like, yep, there now I can hear when that switch goes on. And I’m like, now they are forever changed. And once that happens, they can go begin to provide value to their local marketplace. And that ripple effect begins and that’s what I get excited about. Is that ripple effect, it’s it’s people who I will never who’s never going to say thank you. But that could be just one less wife who gets to be a stay at home mom, just one less. And because she’s a stay at home mom, maybe you know, she invests just a little bit more in the kids. And that’s one child who doesn’t take a turn for the worst, simply because mom was able to stay at home. No one will attribute it to anything. You know, like that it will seem innocent. But it’s so profound.
David Ralph [39:30]
There’s so many great people out in the world. And more often than not, I find that it’s the ones doing the simplest stuff that have the biggest impact. So of your work, if somebody’s listening in now, and they’re intrigued and fascinated, is there one thing that they can start doing? What is the first thing
J Massey [39:54]
right now the most important thing they can learn do is become a better communicator period. We and Toastmasters is an organisation worldwide. Go look it up, join, compete, learn to communicate, because most of the time for whatever it is that you’re looking to do, learning how to communicate and lead, to step into those roles is what’s required. You’ve got to become a completely different person. And communication is at the centre of that. Because you got to communicate your ideas when you’re selling something. You got to communicate your ideas. When you’re trying to help your kids, you got to just learn how to be an effective, persuasive, entertaining communicator who has something relevant to say. And it’s just one of those basic skill sets that are required. The second thing if you for those of you who are overachievers and want some extra marks, go and do the thing you fear most. Now And practice what I call moving at the speed of instruction. And when you learn to do that, the world again, it changes. You the world changes. I mean, it’s like when you you have all this anxiety over some something and then you experience that something and go, that’s it. Yeah. And you need to go knock that wall down. Those strongholds need to be destroyed, so that you can give yourself permission so that you will wake up one day and go, you know what, I do have something to offer. And here it is, take me as I am, and and go find those people who resonate with that message and make it happen.
David Ralph [41:39]
I agree with that. Totally. I was being interviewed on another show. Once you as you are on my show, once you get a certain profile, people invite you onto their shows, and it’s great and you talk about yourself, and that’s what we like to do. And they were talking to about my leap of faith and the lady says, you know, Was it scary? And I said No, honestly, when you come to do the leap, it’s So planned in your head, or it should be in my view, I don’t believe this just make up your mind and go for it. But it’s not scary. The scary is leading up to it. And the 3456 months leading up to it thinking now, is this the right thing? Should our I’m getting paid constantly. I don’t even have to do anything at work. I just get paid. I just turn up and now I’m gonna have to work for a living and all that kind of stuff. Did you find that with your mentor is when you actually get up and you speak in front of 500 people when you sit down afterwards? You go, not so bad. Actually, it was it was worse in my head before I actually got up there.
J Massey [42:36]
Often, yes, in fact, I can tell you like the first time I was onstage with Robert Kiyosaki, it was hilarious, because I didn’t know he just invited me to come and speak and I didn’t know how many people were going to be there. And I didn’t I didn’t even ask I didn’t even think to ask, I mean, you didn’t matter. It was important. It’s not like I was going to say no. So I get there and then There’s literally 4000 people in the room and I’m just like, oh my god 4000 people and I was trying to work myself up over the 4000 people blah blah blah blah. I was like, okay, cool, I can do this and just before I was supposed to go on stage, I learned that it was also broadcast in 90 countries and I was like, oh my god
David Ralph [43:22]
you didn’t need laxative Did you?
J Massey [43:24]
Oh, no, I did I was oh man, it just changed everything and I was just like, you know what this is the moment is I gotta make it count because somebody’s listening and and we you know, my wife and I we did that and it was awesome. But sometimes the the anticipation of that something is is greater than the actual doing it’s like gone, you know, those roller coasters at the beginning. You’re going up, up, up, up. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And then when you get done with the roller coaster, you’re like, man, I want to go again. That was it. Let’s do it. Again. It’s
David Ralph [43:56]
Yeah, it’s a lot like that. I had a gentleman on the show, and this is a great Destroy. I’ve heard of actually confronting your fears. He’s Tom Ziegler, Zig Ziglar, his son, and oh yeah, he came on the show, and when he’s far, but he’s father used to stand up and do all these presentations. And he used to sort of run the office behind the scenes. And when he’s father unfortunately sort of passed away. The company was saying, right, Tom, I think it’s up to you to step forward and, you know, become the motivational man. He was saying, I don’t want to do that, that No, I’d rather stay at the back. And I said, No, that’s what the company needs. I need a figurehead and they need the new Ziegler to sort of step forward. And he really fought against it until he went okay. Oh, I’ll do it. And the very first time he public spoke 15,000 people, I imagine that he walked onto the stage, and he said, I couldn’t even breathe. It was like the hardest thing to get my words out. And I managed to get two words out of four words out of a sentence, and many eased into it. It was still the most terrifying experience of his life. But when is he going from that for nothing to 15,000? So anyone out there can confront their fears currently if I need to.
J Massey [45:12]
Well, yeah. And that’s that, and that’s the thing. It’s, and that’s back to what you and I were talking about at the beginning. If you don’t have to, you’re not going to. And for most of us, if we’re too comfortable, we don’t have to, so we’re not going to or why risk it, why rock the boat until we realise the truth of the situation that we probably should have been doing something like that all along. And what we’re currently doing isn’t going to get us to where we want to go. And then we are suddenly now we’re uncomfortable. We’re willing to risk what we once perceived as secure in order to gain something greater. Well, let’s play the words now of the whole theme of the show. These words were spoken 15 years ago. 10 years ago, something and they are as hugely powerful today as they were when they were first spoken. This is Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [46:07]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [46:42]
Do you believe that will make all the difference as he says
J Massey [46:46]
I believe very strongly, because I’ve been thinking about one of the things that you asked me earlier about the five year old are the breed and you know before I think one of the things that you know, a major dot that connects up for me is just the use of technology. You know, because of my comfort with technology. The company enjoys a great distribution model laid on top of you know, the foundation of iTunes and everything that Jobs himself built. There are that that was never one of my excuses or hurdles was, technology is like, Okay, cool. I’ll just learn how to do the little pieces that are definitely there. But learning to walk in what I call that freefall feeling because you don’t exactly know where you’re going. You just know you’re going somewhere is important because it’s going to take you somewhere you just don’t know where you’re going to end up and you just say yes and figure it out on the wait some of the time and you go and you just go with it. It doesn’t really matter. You know, it won’t be a waste of time or energy. Just learn something as you go through that process and enjoy The ride. And at the end of the day, somehow it manages to work itself out.
David Ralph [48:06]
And when would you pick up the if you look back over your timeline joining up all your dots? Where would the moment be that you go? Yeah, that I think that was really when things started really going my way.
J Massey [48:19]
There was a time, you know, when I was doing the doing when we were first getting started with some of our real estate transactions, and I thought, you know, you can have, so you just got to understand, for months prior, we had done none. Then we got one done. Then three weeks later, we had done 11 then a few weeks after that we’d done a whole nother set. So in my head, I could I had the thought maybe I just got lucky. You know, will it happen again? And but then it kept happening. And I was and then there came a point where I just had to go You know what? This is real. This is the new me Awesome, great. All that stuff that I had been told, you know, don’t talk to strangers, it takes money to make money have, you can’t have a house if your credit score is bad, you you can’t all that stuff. I just had to let it go. And to you know, version 1.0 and upgrade. And I began to embrace the new version of what was emerging. I remember that. I remember that I remember making decisions. Like I said, before I was born with asthma. I remember the day that I had an asthma attack early in the morning, but I still got up that Later that morning to go train some people now mind you, when I had a job, I would have easily and justifiably been able to say, you know, I’m not feeling that great because I can’t breathe. There’s not a person on this planet who’s going to say no, no, you need to come in anyway. But I remember the day that I got up anyway, and still pushed forward because it meant that much to to make sure that I was there to follow through for the team. So, you know, it’s things like that that stick out in my mind.
David Ralph [50:16]
I only hope on that morning when you was laying in bed I hope the rocky music was playing and you you you got off. And you ran down there with kids chasing after you.
J Massey [50:30]
Yeah, I don’t that’s only in the movie.
David Ralph [50:33]
We can make movies can’t we? Joey we started again now. Yeah. And very beginning of this show. I said your life was like a movie we’ve been DS or Denzel.
J Massey [50:44]
It. Well, actually, it was pretty funny when you said that. I was like, No, it was more like Will Smith in the pursuit of happiness. Well, they’ve already made the movie. It was ridiculous case. So would you which which one of those three Would you like to actually play you in? to film
Oh, wow, interesting.
I would have to I’m still gonna go with Will Smith I have the most of I have a lot in common his life in my life. We have just a lot in common, but he is that’s the problem. He’s got very
David Ralph [51:17]
stick. Yes, I do have larger
J Massey [51:23]
as they don’t stick up quite as far but they’re definitely there. So yeah, we have a lot of life experience in this that is the same.
David Ralph [51:31]
Yeah, I’m always amazed that will smith can run fast in films because we both ears there must be some dry.
J Massey [51:38]
Pulling it a little bit a little bit a little bit. But you adapt. You work with it right?
David Ralph [51:43]
Of course you do. Just pin them back, pin them back and get go faster. Right. This is the end of the show now. And this is the part when we’re going to send you on a journey back to speak to your younger self. And if you could go back and speak to the young Jay, what age would you choose and what advice would you give? Well, we’re going to find out because I’m going to play the theme tune and when it first Drop. This is the Sermon on the mic
Unknown Speaker [52:11]
with the speed of the show.
J Massey [52:28]
All right, Jay, I know you hear me today. You’re 20, early 20s and it’s gonna feel like for the next few years that you are not doing the thing that you’re supposed to be doing, but get this you have it within you to be stronger, bigger, better, faster than you can possibly imagine. You have just begun to discover the greatness that is inside you and don’t you dare think for one moment that you are somehow alone on this journey and that no one will come to your aid or help you. This is not the truth. The truth is you have a lot in store for you you are going to have more than one journey you’re going to see things that you have never experienced and you will make it you will survive you are have sturdy stock, you have the ability to thrive and you will one day be able to help someone else. Other than just yourself. It won’t be just about eating just about food. It will be about so much more. And you’ll be able to do it you’ll be able to consistently do it. It won’t be a fluke of nature and don’t even worry about the fact that you may for time have no place to stay no car, no clothes and when you are going through the dumpster breaking up that that that sweater Know that it’s still going to be okay and that all of that is momentary. All of that is formational. And all of that will one day become the very thing that gives you the ability to go out there and inspire and help and be genuine. With everything that you do. The end of the day, it’s, it’s gonna be okay. You won’t be by yourself, you will have people who support you who believe in you who will toe the line and help the ship to float. They will put an oar in the water and row. What’s interesting is that you will continue to grow. And you will surprise yourself with the things that you have done with the places that you have gone, the people that you have met, and you will be in disbelief. With the words that people say about you. You won’t recognise that You won’t be the same. And it’ll be well beyond any upgrade that you could possibly imagine. Provided you just remember to keep putting one foot in front of the other learn to take it one day at a time. Don’t worry so much about the future. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Just focus on today.
David Ralph [55:25]
Yeah, how can our audience connect with you sir?
J Massey [55:29]
The best way to do that is to go over to cash flow diary, podcast calm or cash flow diary.com. And for those of you listening, if you want, you can get a free copy of my e book, I wrote a book and I’m giving away the ebook, the ebook version for at no cost, so you can go over to learn investing now.com. Just put in your details, and I’ll send you a copy.
David Ralph [55:55]
We’ll have all the links on the show notes. Jay, thank you so much for spending With us today, joining up those dots and please come back again when you have more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our pasts is the best way to build our futures. Mr. Jay Massey, thank you so much.
J Massey [56:13]
Thank you for having me.
David Ralph [56:17]
Thanks for listening to today’s episode of Join Up Dots brought to you exclusively by podcasters mastery.com. The only resource that shows you how to create a show, build an income and still have time for the life that you love. Check out podcasters mastery.com. Now,
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you or wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.