Welcome to the Steve Jobs based Join Up Dots Free Podcast with Robert Mallon
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Introducing Robert Mallon
Today’s guest joining us on the Join Up Dots free podcast interview is Robert Mallon, a man driven to make a difference to the men of the world.
Alongside his business partner, Bill Watkins, he is the founder of RustyLion Academy, where they work with men between the ages of 30 and 49 to help them make huge steps forwards in their entrepreneurial ventures.
He knows better than most, that no man is an island, and by connecting with mentors and other like minded individuals across the globe their students make bolder and bolder decisions and believe in themselves to achieve greatness.
But it hasn’t always been a road full of such positivity.
As a child, he struggled with the absence of his father he left the family when he was in the third grade.
His mother suddenly losing the partner in her life, and the income provider had to take three jobs to survive.
How The Dots Joined Up For Robert
He knew that he had to do something and as he says in his own words “I started working at thirteen to help out at home.
I took jobs in restaurants and waited tables at a dinner theatre.
I did paper routes and yard work around the neighbourhood.
I was a hardware store clerk, a roughneck, and I’m sure other things I can’t remember.
In one sense, I was very lucky because I went from elementary school through high school with the same group of people, so I had a lot of friends, but I was unlucky in the same sense.
Divorce wasn’t as usual as it is today.
I was ashamed my parents had gotten divorced, so I made people believe my dad just travelled a lot.
That was tough. I felt really alone because no one knew what was actually going on.”
But through that darkness a man came into his life, who showed such kindness and wisdom, that life was changed for ever
He had discovered his first mentor, and realised how life changing and powerful having someone to bounce of ideas with, or just converse with one to one could be.
And this seems to me to be one of the first big dots, on his Join Up Dots timeline.
But perhaps he would say otherwise, and point to other moments that have led him to where he is today?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots, with the one and only Mr Robert Mallon
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Robert Mallon such as:
How he recalls how his Mother pushed for her male employee to take him under his wing and what a gift his presence was throughout his life.
Why the name of the Rusty Lion Academy came to the fore and how powerful an image it is to all of us.
Why it is so important to be truly authentic in your life to focus in on the key skill and talent that you can do better than anyone.
Why the world today to wants to live in a microwave society and there is not getting away from it.
And how the memory of being bought a nice coat as a kid, could bring Robert to tears nearly half a century later.
How To Connect With Robert Mallon
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Full Transcription Of Robert Mallon Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
Do you have a business that can’t get going or would love to create your own one that works whilst you sleep and is built around the things you love? Well, podcasters mastery is the place to go to learn the six simple steps to create a business that flourishes connecting with thousands of customers that tell you what products they want. podcasters mastery is the online route to business success. Check us out now.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:48]
Yes, hello, everybody. Join Up Dots. It’s David Ralph. We’re coming from the United Kingdom. And if you don’t know where we broadcast from, it’s just that the guest that she asked who we’re going to record An episode with and you hear me at the very beginning live from the back of his garden. But if you follow the River Thames in the United Kingdom out to the sea, just where it’s all gets the widest part that’s where I’m recording. So you can look on the map you can follow along and you can send up the Join Up Dots dot into the sky and where it lands that will be me So come on come out and wherever beer together and it’d be good not not hundreds of you, though, not hundreds because the whiteboard like it. Now, today’s guest is a man driven to make a difference to the men of the world now alongside his business partner, Bill Watkins. He is the founder of rusty line Academy where they work with men between the ages of 30 and 49. To help them make huge steps forward in their entrepreneurial ventures. He knows better than most but no man is an island by connecting with mentors and other like minded individuals across the globe. Their students make bolder and bolder decisions and believe in themselves to achieve greatness. Now it hasn’t always been a road full of such positivity as a child. He struggled with absence of his father, who left the family when he was in the third grade and his mother, suddenly losing the partner in her life, any income provider had to take three jobs to survive. He knew that he had to do something. And as he says, In his own words, I started working at 13 to help out at home and then I took jobs in restaurants and waited tables at Dinner Theatre. I did paper roots and yard work around the neighbourhood. I was a hardware store clerk, a rough neck, and I’m sure other things I can’t remember. In one sense, I was very lucky because I went from elementary school through high school with the same group of people. So I had a lot of friends but I was unlucky in the same sense. Same sense. The boss wasn’t as useful as it is today. I was ashamed. My parents had gotten divorced. So I made people believe my dad just travelled a lot, and that was tough. I felt really alone because no one knew what was actually going on. Now, but through that darkness A man came into his life who showed such kindness and wisdom but his life is changed but ever he discovered his first mentor and realised how life changing Having someone to bounce off ideas was and just converse with one to one could be. And it seems to me that this is one of these first big dots on his Join Up Dots timeline. But perhaps he would say otherwise and point to other moments that have led him to where he is today. Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Mr. Robert Mallon. How are you, Robert?
Robert Mallon [3:21]
I am so good. And you are so good at doing homework. That’s all I’ve got to say. I like
David Ralph [3:27]
I like to research because there’s an awful lot of stuff I find out about people, which kind of moves me even though I’ve been doing this show for so many years now and so many episodes. When I read something like I put into the introduction from your own words, that is rough that is really open and why why did you feel that you needed to put yourself out there as much as you did on your web page because that was very genuine and open.
Robert Mallon [3:58]
You know that’s just who I am. And you know, when you say why did I do that? I didn’t even think about the why it’s who I am. I guess it explains a little bit about where I am today and where I come from. And there’s such a big difference. I’m 60 years old. Now, we were obviously talking about when I was a kid and a teenager back then, but I look back and just go, oh my gosh, so many things have changed. And, but really, you’re right. Those things were the beginning dots when you said that that really resonated with me.
David Ralph [4:29]
And do you look back at it and think to yourself, yeah, I could sense that something was going on, even though as a child, you weren’t probably as aware. Maybe your mom and dad kept it from you?
Robert Mallon [4:42]
Yeah, you know, I knew I knew things were going on between them because my bedroom was next to the kitchen and I would hear them arguing I would hear them fight and my bad dad just to give you a little, you know, kind of background but he was way up in the government with the US government and very, very intelligent A very, very nice looking guy which by the way was not a good thing but he was caught several times, you know in adulterous affairs by my mother. And so I can remember as a little boy some of my first memories were listening to them argue and fight and, and all that and the doors slamming and him leaving for the night and different things like that. And so when he left when I was eight years old, there really wasn’t a male figure in my life at that point. Except for like coaches like I was pretty good athlete. I was very good at baseball and soccer and basketball. I was very good at those. So the coaches, I think my mother had a lot to do with talking to them saying, you know, could you spend a little bit more time with Robert and so that was good, but that first mentor that you talked about, it actually ended up being my mother’s boss, she went back to school. When they divorced, she was up. This was back in the 60s. But she was a housewife. And really, you know, she had a high school education, but that was about it, went back to school, got a degree and became the executive secretary. They don’t call them secretaries anymore. But for a gentleman who owned a company called Petroleum Engineering, and he built pipelines all over the world oil pipelines, very wealthy guy. And again, I think it was my mother that pushed him to start having conversations with me in it ended up he was the best man in my wedding. He, when in the introduction, you said that I was a roughneck at one point, but he hired me back then when I was 15 1617 years old, and I would go out with guys that were in their 30s and 40s. And this was before the government said they couldn’t do this kind of stuff. But he would tell These guys he’s roughneck guys. Work him just like you work anybody else. So I was working 12 to 15 hour days, during the summer and at Christmas time, and, and just seeing some things that most kids would never see. And yet it was one of the best things in the world because he always showed faith in me. And he always, I always had to go have conversations with him when I got in trouble. And he was a tough guy. But But also, he taught me through law.
David Ralph [7:26]
Yeah, just tell me and what was your mom? Sure. In one ways, I’m gonna say what she a good judge of character. But of course she married you, your dad and didn’t go well. But what was it that she saw in this guy that she realised was going to be something useful and positive in your life?
Robert Mallon [7:46]
Yeah, I look back at him now and he passed away back in the late 1980s. But I look at the relationship that we had. He was such a giver. And although he had this huge company and he was a multimillionaire back in the 60s 70s 80s. Probably 52. Before I knew him, he he was the kind of guy that just gave more to life than he asked of life. And I believe that she saw that in him. And he had such a huge impact on. You’ve heard of Charlotte, North Carolina? Yeah, Charlotte. Yep. Huge. It’s a big town, big town back then. It was a big town too. That’s where I grew up. But everybody in Charlotte, North Carolina, I knew who this guy was. And yet he would do things with me and for me, that I look back on now. specific things that just blow my mind that he would take the time to do that with me in it change literally change the course of my life, his investment in me
David Ralph [9:00]
So give us an example of something that you look back on now. And these these gentlemen gave you the time and the energy and the effort and you go, Wow, this was a gift.
Robert Mallon [9:10]
I’ll tell you one, maybe two, but one was one. I was 18 years old. And my mother worked really, really hard. And I was working. But it was wintertime. And I guess, I’ll just tell you the story, and you’ll get the end of it, you understand. But he came to the house one Saturday morning, probably at 830 in the morning, and like you said, about the beers I had been up the night before. And I had partied and like, I didn’t want to get up at eight o’clock in the morning, on a Saturday morning at all, but he comes in my room. He’s like, messing with Get up, get up. We got to go do something, you know, so I’m like, Oh, dude, you know not I would never talk back to him because he was too strong for me to do that. But he puts me in his big green Cadillac. He always had the biggest Cadillac that they made and we drove to downtown Charlotte and he settle on the way says, Okay, I’m sponsoring this kid from Africa. He’s coming in. He’s flying in late this afternoon and picking him up, but I’m helping him with school. And so he’s about the same size as you are. But what I want to do is I’ve got to get him a winter jacket, winter coat, like a long coat. And so he took me to the the nicest tailor, men’s shop in Charlotte, North Carolina, a place that I’d known of, but I’ve never gone into it’s just too nice for me. And so, he, when he walked in the door, everybody knew who he was called him, you know, hey, Wk Hey, Wk Wilson was his name. And so he said, Okay, here’s get show this young man where the coats are let him look through selected coats for about 30 minutes. And finally, I found one I was going Oh, man, I mean, this thing is like really, really, really nice, you know? And so he said, Okay, now if that was you, would that be the one that you would get? Absolutely, you know, so he says, Are you sure? Because you know, anyone you think is good. I’ll buy it for the show this other young man. I said, Yeah, it’d be great. So we go up to the front, he always carried around this big wad of hundred dollar bills. I mean, you know, it’s just one of those things. But he pays for the code back then this is probably, I don’t know, 73. A couple hundred dollars, which, you know, that’s, that’s an expensive code.
David Ralph [11:27]
It’s a lot of money. So
Robert Mallon [11:29]
it’s a lot of money. Yeah. So he, he pays for it. He gives it to a salesman, he says, Put that on a box and I want you to put a bow on it because I want to give it to this young man, you know, in a boat. And when the guy came back out, it was all wrapped up in he had a bow on it. And he got it. He turned to me and he says I knew that you needed a jacket. Here it is. And you might hear my voice right? I’m a little bit choked up. Imagine I was like, are you You serious? And he’s like, yeah, I knew you needed to cut. This is only way I figured I could get you up here to get to one. And I look back at that generosity, and excuse me for getting choked up here, but it’s like, really, you know, and he showed me that that’s how to do life. And I think I’ve carried that with me that those types of lessons he showed me were just, and it goes on and on and on. I mean, he did so many just out of here, you know, just unusual things that most people don’t do. But that man led an extraordinary life. And so he worked my ass off, excuse me for saying that he really did. I mean, he made sure that I knew all about what hard work was, but he also encouraged me so much along the way. And he held me accountable and there was nobody, you know, we’re not when I got 1314 years old mom couldn’t hold me accountable anymore because I was a little bit wild back then. But he was a guy that used to just hold me accountable. It’s pretty amazing. Pretty amazing. I got a tear going down my cheek right now, David. Now
David Ralph [13:11]
we have a lot of tears on this programme. Don’t Don’t worry about it. But it is fascinating, isn’t it? How more often than not yet, if your family members are not the ones that are the driving force in your life, it seems that as growing up, we almost take the family members for granted. And they’re just people there. It’s only later that we look back and we realise what the true gifts they gave us. But the strangers the ones that we don’t expect by are the ones that do those life changing things, those simple things, which more often than not, we’re getting anyway, but we don’t appreciate him because it’s just family members.
Robert Mallon [13:49]
Yeah, yeah, very, very true. Very true.
David Ralph [13:51]
So we’ll rusty line Academy, which is the very first thing and I bet you get this all the time, so I had to look it up while Why the hell was he called rusty line. And I thought this is this is a strange name, but actually, it’s a great name. And I’d like you to tell the listeners why you’ve called it the rusty line Academy. And tell us what the relevance of that imagery is.
Robert Mallon [14:18]
So the rusty lions are men, ages 50 and older who have had a lot of success. Most of them are entrepreneurs or business leaders slash owners. The young lions are men between the ages of 30 and 49, who are either entrepreneurs or business owners or leaders. And so the way that we came up with rescue lion Academy bill bill Watkins, my partner, he and I have been coaching men or people for years back in 2002. I actually started so it’s been 1314 years now and build back in 2009. He was an Olympic athlete and a world class athlete when he was younger, and he made a decision to try to win the men’s national bicycling championship in the United States, in 2011. And so he gave himself a two year goal and he had not been on a bicycle or like 30 years or so. But he started writing a blog called the rusty lion. And Bill, he’s a West Point graduate. Just an extremely strong guy, in a lot of different ways. A lot of character. Just a very strong guy, but the word rusty lion just kind of resonated with him, and he’s definitely a lion by nature and so on. But we’re getting a little bit over the hill, you know, so we kind of consider so we’ve got a little bit of rust on us. And also we both have a lot of scars on this. We had a lot of success. We’ve had some failures in life. Actually last My first wife to cancer about 10 years ago right now, actually, this month it was 10 years ago. And I’ve had a wayward son who’s doing very well now, but you know, we’ve got the rest, and we’ve got the battle scars out there. And many of those scars, both of us feel really lead to a lot of wisdom, if you do it the right way. So you can either let them defeat you or you can use them as growth vehicles and you can learn from the mistakes that you made. So that’s where the word rusty lion came from. It was actually the title of his blog post, when he was talking about the goal of winning that championship. And by the way, he won that championship and he was, it was basically everybody in the United States. 35 years old and older who rides a bike and many of them were professional athletes. He wanted at age 57, which is like the craziest thing in the world that they actually won that but he did. So instead of him winning bat
David Ralph [17:00]
Was it talent? Or was it just bloody mindedness out? What was that they all got? I think it was both. I
Robert Mallon [17:08]
think it was both built also physical specimen. He, you don’t. He was he did like Tour de France stuff and you don’t do that kind of stuff unless you’re gifted, you know, God’s blessed you with like a certain type of body and you know, lung capacity and the ability to process oxygen that most of us could not ever do. But he started off, you know, after 30 years of not doing any competitive type stuff like that. He was just, he was out of shape, you know, for him anyway. And so I think it was sheer tenacity. I know the the year before he did the actual race. The race was, I believe, September 2 of 2011. That the full year before he rode his bicycle a little over 11,000 miles. Now think about how how much training that is 11,000 miles in one year. So I think it was a lot of it as Bo has mentioned he
David Ralph [18:12]
did you do not think he’s mad?
Robert Mallon [18:14]
Mad isn’t crazy. Yeah, yeah, I think he’s real crazy. Yeah. And I love it. I think he’s extreme maybe that’s a better way Santa and I love extreme people like that. I love that. They just see things bigger than what most people see.
David Ralph [18:29]
Did you need his craziness because talking to you, you seem very stable. You seem very centred in many ways and do you need he’s he’s madness to take you to greater heights does it work as a partnership? He’s, he’s madness brings you up and your soda stableness calms him down somewhat.
Robert Mallon [18:49]
I would say it’s almost the opposite. And I know that might not sound right to you, but bill was a mechanical engineer. By education, his mind thinks very steadily in his mind thinks very much in terms of systems, and so he is world class and I would literally say the world class, it being able to bring a tonne of information, and then take it all out and put it into different systems that work well said that we’re always creating systems to move forward and move forward, move forward, I am very much more the front front of the stage person, he would be the behind the stage person. And I would be very much at the front of the stage. So I’m a little bit in a way a little bit crazier than he is. And I think he likes that. And so together. It’s very funny because we’re very, very different people. But our core philosophy about light is very, very similar. And we both have a heart for what we do and for helping grow, you know, the men and the clients that we work with. And so it’s really what we do is One on one coaching with these men. And it’s very unique. It’s almost like one plus one equals three, when we’re together, and when we’re coaching, and we take them places, he’ll see something that I might not, but then I’ll see something else. And so we really work with each other very well and helping these people seriously create some extraordinary labs.
David Ralph [20:22]
Now, if we went right back to the very beginning statement or question that I made, why did you lay everything out on the about page? But that really is how connections are made nowadays, isn’t it? People are more likely to go for the real and the honest and the genuine more than the snazzy sales page, which you can’t really get a flavour of. Do you find that that is how life is operating where you operate? Did your your students take that same sort of imagery and content forward into their own platforms?
Robert Mallon [20:57]
I think so very much. I also think, you know, always when we start with the client, they don’t know what to expect, they just don’t know. And you can’t blame anybody for being a little bit hesitant at first. You know, I would be guarded Actually, I’ve, I’ve got coaches in my life and I’ve had coaches in my life. Matter of fact, a story we could go down would be a coach that I had, who actually helped just completely changed my life back in the early 2000s. But usually within, and it’s almost miraculous, but they can tell within one session, that we’re the real deal, and that when they win, we win and that we really, really mean that. And so they drop the pretences very quickly. And we don’t have pretences going into it. And I think that, like you said just a couple of minutes ago, there’s a deep yearning today, for authenticity and for just Genuine pneus of spirit. And I don’t know whether you can fake that, you know, it was almost like the question that you asked, I was thinking, Well, you know, golly, you know, is it something that we fake? Or like, how do you do that? I don’t know how you do that other than that’s who you are at core. Does that make sense for you?
Unknown Speaker [22:19]
But it does. But
David Ralph [22:20]
I know a lot of people talk about the fake it till you make it. And I kind of believe in now on a competence level, putting yourself out there until it it comes together somehow. And more often than not, when it comes together. You actually were there at the beginning, it was your authentic self. It was your starting point that really sort of gives the power and pushes you forward. But I do think that nowadays that that openness and transparency, especially in the online world, where you actually are seeing people’s earnings and their sort of income statements and stuff that people are putting on. It’s a world of car, isn’t it from even sort of five or 10 years, I suppose where it was sales pitches and long tail forms and god knows what, but get people in do your clients by word of mouth, or do you have to market heavily because I know you’ve got this remarkable podcast and if anybody wants a break from Join Up Dots go over and listen to the rusty lion because it’s great stuff that I talked about. And it’s a real genuine conversation that you that you have. So does it come from? Is it marketing? Or is it just word of mouth?
Robert Mallon [23:27]
It comes from it kind of comes from all over the place. I think a lot of it is word of mouth. And it’s very strange how people do find us and it’s always different. But we’ve got a social media person on our team, who actually does that for us. She put, you know, she deals with LinkedIn. She also works with Facebook, and just as a remarkable job. So she gets her name out there quite well, but podcast is really up and running and is is growing, you know, month by month by month. It’s really growing out there and we try to put great content just like you think So they’re gonna, you know, really capture people’s attention and just kind of get them going in the right way. But so it’s a lot of different variables that we have David, and probably just like you probably just like you
David Ralph [24:13]
did. Does it annoy you though that the variables because I’ll be honest with you, and I’ve said this a few times recently, I’m probably repeating myself, all I want to do really is the podcast, if I could do the podcast and let everything else float, and it naturally finds its place. But of course, until you get to that tipping point, you have to do all that extra work. Do you find that that takes you away from your genuine super talent, that thing that you are doing that provides most value to your business?
Robert Mallon [24:42]
It did it first. And that’s only because it was me and Bill at first and so we had to do everything and then move it up and then his income started coming in. We’re both lucky because we both have done pretty well financially. So we’re able to handle you know, the day to day type things without worrying about income coming in or having to make the income right now. So as the money came in, we just continued to reinvest it in the way that we did it was we started adding people. And we started. I’m a very firm believer, David, that you do what you do best. Yeah. And that’s all that you do. And that’s all that you do. And then you farm it out to other people. So we have on our team right now about 15 support people. None of them work for us. They’re all contractors that we work with, but it’s in all different types of areas. And we find that we find world class people to actually help us give you a good example. We have a young lady who lives in Cyprus in the Mediterranean, she’s our writer. And so we do a blog every week but you know, I’m an okay writer, Bill’s an okay writer. You know, we both them blogs. You know, they sometimes are fun. Sometimes they suck, you know, and sometimes it can just suck the life out of you trying to get one out there. Well, she was a college professor. She’s pretty young. She’s only early 30s, maybe mid 30s or so. But she loves taking ideas, and then writing them in a really coherent way. And she’s also super good at understanding Bill’s voice and my voice, so she can write in our voice, so that when our blood goes out, it’s us speaking and actually we have conversations, and then she writes, you know what we talk about, but she does so good. Well, she loves that kind of stuff. And she spends hours on that kind of stuff. For me, it’s like, Ah, you know, I don’t want to do that. So two things like you with a podcast. I love coaching men. I truly believe that’s what I was created for. And I also love interviewing men almost podcasts, I love it. I think it’s the most fun thing in the world to do those two things. If I’m not doing those two things, I’m totally wasting my time. And so I try. I mean, you got to do some things that you don’t want to do. But I really try to clear my plate every day. And just concentrate on those things. And that’s where, if I was to speak to your audience of younger people, that’s what you got to do. And you’ve heard this said before, let me see if I can make sense of this. Don’t dig a hole a mile wide, and an inch deep. Dig a hole an inch wide, and a mile deep. And what that means is go super deep with what you’re really, really, really good at. And just keep digging and keep digging. And you might think, well, maybe I should be. If you’re really good. If it’s a combination of your passion and your strength, if that’s where you are and that’s where you work every day. If you work long enough, you’re going to be successful. And let me ask you, David, do you you agree with that?
David Ralph [28:00]
I do agree with it, I have a different thing. I have a banner in front of my office. And it’s the Steve Martin thing, the comedian. And he just says, become so good that they can’t ignore you anymore. And it’s pretty much says the same thing. As you just said, back at the beginning, I talked about this a lot, Robert, because when you start off any business, it is literally crickets at the beginning and you feel like you’re wasting your time. But actually what you’re doing, you’re growing the foundations. And I’ve released 428 shows whatever. And I would say that the first hundred were practice. The next hundred was me really getting my feet. The third hundred was me really enjoying it. The fourth hundred was me thinking, I’m getting this. And it’s all practice, practice, practice and you can’t expect to just get going straightaway. plants don’t grow overnight. businesses don’t grow overnight, but for some reason we kind of feel that it should be faster than it is. But if you do that thing that You do better than anyone, totally believer. I totally believe it doesn’t matter how long it takes, because you’re going to get better at doing that. And then something will happen. I’ve had some remarkable things happen us afternoon, which six months ago, I would have thought how the hell Has that happened? Yeah, you know, I’m gonna be live broadcasting. And when’s this gonna happen? This is, um, this shows going out on the 18th of September. Not just checking my list, no, no, the 21st of September. So on the 19th of September, I will have had a live broadcast to the Speakers Association of California. And they’re beaming me in live to do a presentation via Skype and an interview and stuff. And when you think, you know, I’m recording from the United Kingdom, and I’m now being broadcast into California live, like Barack Obama or something, you know, it blows your mind, but it’s only because of those, those hours and hours and hours of fine tuning and getting better at something that people start to sort of notice you. I Tony by 100%, in what you’re saying, sir,
Robert Mallon [30:03]
and let me tell you two thoughts as you were talking there that come to mind that, number one, people today want to live in what I would call a microwave society. What that means is you just zap and it cooks, and you’re done. And, you know, and I know that that there is no microwave out there for success. You know, you might get a little bit lucky and you might beat it by a few months or something, but it takes a whole lot of hard work. So for your listeners, I would say just expect the hard work but every day get out there and just do it. And the other thing that I think you were talking about in kind of me too, was there’s a saying that I love do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain. And so I think many of your listeners probably dream of things that maybe they could do and but they’re too afraid to get out there and just try it just like you, David, if you remember back to your first five or so podcast, I’ll remember my first five. And I mean, within five, you’re, you’re actually kind of moving along pretty good. But I can remember the first second third, I was going, Man, I’m freaking out. I’m not real good at this. And I hope I get better at this and about 10 You know, you’re kind of running right along about 20. You’re, you’re like, twice as good as you were five. And so it’s kind of like that, just keep doing it. And if you fear, that’s okay, because the fear is going to go away if you just keep doing it. So I think it’s at one step after another step in another day after another day, and that’s where success lives is just staying on that road.
David Ralph [31:41]
Absolutely. And I’m gonna play some words that really sort of tie into that and fulfil that part of your journey where you just don’t have the answers and you don’t know the best way to go. This is Oprah.
Oprah Winfrey [31:52]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself, what is the next Right move, not think about Oh, I got all of this stuff but what is the next right move? And then from that space, make the next right move and the next right move and not to be overwhelmed by it because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment. You know, you’re not defined by what somebody says is a failure for you. Because failure is just there to point you in a different direction.
David Ralph [32:24]
incredibly powerful words and every time I listen to them, I think to myself, gee, she’s now on that one. It really is step after step after step or dot after dot after dot, isn’t it?
Robert Mallon [32:36]
I think it’s yours. You know, as she was speaking, I just thought of something but my wife is in Charleston, South Carolina. Right now I’m in Atlanta, Georgia. And that’s about a five and a half hour drive. But when, when Sandy left a couple of days ago to go down there she was with a couple of girlfriends. She knew the destination, but she couldn’t see farther than the horizon. So she can see maybe a mileage, you know, at a time. But she knew that she was going to get on this road, and then this road and then this road and then this road. And I don’t know how many roads she was on, if she took that five and a half hour drive down there, but probably, you know, 30 or 40. She couldn’t see everyone. But she just kept driving, she kept moving forward. And she had somewhat of a roadmap. And she didn’t worry about three turns ahead. She just worried about what was the next road that I need to get on to get to that destination. And I think that’s a really good analogy for life is you know, if you know what the goal is, and you know that you really, I think that’s a key that most people don’t do is try to figure out what is the end result that they want. So they’re vague in their generalistic as opposed to getting really, really specific about what they they want to go after. Then they can start figuring out what are the roads and what are the turns to actually get Get there.
David Ralph [34:00]
Yeah, I do think I like this analogy very much. Because I do think on the on the other side of the fence as well, people try to get the A to B to C as a straight line. But you know, you’re just outside of Atlanta. If you said to me, David, I’ve got a cold beer in the fridge Come on over. Now, I could easily no problem at all, I’d get on a train from where I live up to London, go across to Heathrow Airport, look for a plane for Atlanta, fly over to Atlanta, then I’d have the problems. It’s that last bit. And I think that generally most people can make a good stab of it without having all the answers how they’re going to do that last bit. You make up that last bit. And that’s the bit as we were talking about earlier, you’ve done all the work, you’ve done all the work, you might not think that you’ve got anywhere but you’ve got close enough to be able to achieve what you were aiming for. It just takes time.
Robert Mallon [34:51]
I think so to Devon, you know, one thing I’m noticing is you and I talk a whole lot about beer and you’re really getting me thirsty or so at the end of podcast, I’m definitely gonna have a beer in your name.
David Ralph [35:03]
Well, I’ll be honest with you. I’ve never told anyone this. I always record on the first day. And I did this one show very early. And the night before on a Wednesday, my mate contacted me and said, Do you want to go out for a beer? And I said, Yeah, okay, I’ll go out for a beer. And you know, those beers where you just have one or two, and then suddenly they’re calling last orders and you realise it’s really late and you don’t realise where the whole evenings gone. When I sort of rolled into bed about two o’clock in the morning, and looked at my calendar, and I was recording a show at seven The next morning, and I did the first show drunk. That’s not it’s not good to say that Robert, but I’ve listened back to it and it doesn’t sound like it but I’ll be honest with the listeners, there was one but I was almost walking the white line trying to get myself sober before I press record.
Robert Mallon [35:49]
Well, first things happen and people don’t need to know about it. But now everybody does David so there you go. They know I’ve got a
David Ralph [35:55]
problem like no other kind of problem. So when we look at your your backstory again that leads up to the rusty lion. Did you think that it was always going to happen? Do you think that the mentor coming into the life the fact that you’ve got the scars, do you feel that that actually gave you your super talent that you loved? And without all those things, it wouldn’t put you in that same position?
Robert Mallon [36:20]
Not at all. And can I fill in some more dots for you real quick? Yeah, go from how that kind of happened. Yeah, back in the 1980s. I started in the restaurant business, and I worked for a couple of really, really large restaurant corporations, and had areas all over the southeast part of the United States. So I started off as a manager worked up to General Manager, area director and just kind of, you know, grew what I didn’t understand and this is something that your listeners would probably benefit from but I wasn’t paying attention to what I was really good at, but I was really good at some certain things and I just thought well kind of fluke or whatever. But I was really good at taking managers who would like come into my store, and then working with them and then growing them to where they got promoted really quickly. But But I just thought, well, that’s the way it is. But they started sending people from all over the region to my stores, and then they’d get promoted. And it was just easy for me to do. And I didn’t make an extra Penny, doing that kind of stuff. And it was kind of hard work to do. In 1996, I went to work at a software company, I just really got tired of working, you know, in restaurants and worked for about eight years in that company. And then back in 2002. I was just kind of done with. I was in my late 40s. I was just done with corporate America. And I just felt like you know, there’s something else I need to be doing in my life. And so a friend of mine told me about a guy who was a coach, and I called this guy up and talk to him and how hired him for a three month stint to help me. And one of the very first questions that he asked me was, if you could be anything in the world, what would you be? And I can remember this coming out of my mouth. I wish I could take it the date. I don’t know the date,
David Ralph [38:16]
but you have it. I said, Is that what you wanted?
Robert Mallon [38:19]
Oh, yeah, that way. Why do you think of that? By the way, David? Oh, man, they’re right. But anyway, I said, you know, I’d be some sort of a speaker and I would help people improve their lives. And I had not done a whole lot of speaking up to that point. When it came out of my mouth. I was like, wow, you know, Where’d that come from? And he looked at me and he said, he said exactly this. He said, Dude, he says, Don’t you realise that who you are? And I’m like, really? And he says, Yeah, he says, Man, that that would be so natural for you. So five months later, now, I was a vice president of a software company. I was making really good money. Yeah, I mean, I had a mortgage. Three Sons at home. You know, I completely walked away from that and started a speaking business and that’s that thing, do the thing you fear and the death appears certain. And it took off. It just took off. And I talked a lot about leadership and how to manage people more effectively and how to communicate more effectively. And I got to tell you, David, at the beginning, I was scared to death. Absolutely scared to death. didn’t know what I was. The thing was, I faked it so well that people in the audience didn’t know but I can remember my my hands would sweat in my nose would run. That sounds gross. I get it. But I would take a box of Kleenex I’ve never told anybody this I’m gonna tell you
David Ralph [39:45]
that. I wouldn’t take apart
Robert Mallon [39:47]
tissue it nobody, okay, it’s just you and me. I would take a box of Kleenex and put it up front. I was doing these full day seminars. And throughout the day, I’d have to like wipe my nose or whatever. And it was all nerves and I would tell people that again Hey, I’m real sorry, I’ve got hay fever, I’ve got a cold or something like that. And nobody thought the first thing about it, but it was caused, I was totally freaking out man being in front of people like that. But then it got better. And it got better and it got better. And I started losing, you know, the nerves and all the anxiety and all and, and then because I’ve fought through that, and I had to, by the way, I put myself in a position to where if I didn’t speak, I wasn’t going to make any money. And I had three teenage sons at home that were going dad, we need like 10 gallons of milk this week, you know, so I didn’t have a choice. But then people started saying, What do you coach businesses? I’m like, yeah, absolutely real good at it, you know, never cuts business my life when I’m figuring it out. And what I found was my background, in the things that I was really good at the restaurant business, and in the software business, helped me understand how companies run. So I could take people that were struggling with their businesses, and help grow those businesses like they’ve never grown grown before. And then when Bill came alongside me, and we started working together, it was just like, it was like dynamite, you know, working with businesses and things like that, because it just took off at that point. But it was all it was. It was all fear, David, it was just, and I used to think, you know, back in the 80s, and 90s, what am I going to do when I grow up and I was in my 30s and 40s. Back then I was going Seriously, what am I gonna do when I get a real job, and those were all real jobs, but I just didn’t consider they weren’t my they weren’t my passion.
David Ralph [41:40]
But let’s listen to this speech, which is hugely powerful and really emphasises what you were just saying, Jim Carrey.
Jim Carrey [41:48]
My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant and when I was 12 years old, He was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love
David Ralph [42:15]
ties up quite nicely to what you were just saying is that you took that chance you didn’t know that you could do it. But inside the fight felt right and I coached a lot of people. And I literally start with them going if you believe you can do it. That’s half the battle. That really is a battle.
Robert Mallon [42:32]
That’s okay. Can I share another with your back? And I think I think your audience will this will resonate with them, or some of them, this could help them just take a move. But when I was in the restaurant business, I had done that for about 20 years. And my son’s at that point where I think I had like a nine year old, a 14 year old and a 16 year old at that point, but they were very involved in sports but in the restaurant business, you work hard, and you work a lot hours and when everybody Else is not working. You’re working at your hardest. And so one day I got a call. It was on a Friday, I got a call from my boss. And there had been a problem in one of my stores. And so that was my actual day off that Friday. He called about seven at night. And so he said, Okay, can we meet tomorrow and just talk about it. So we were going to meet at a one of the restaurants about 11 o’clock. So I said, Yeah, that might be great. Why don’t we do 11? Well, my wife was across the room from and she was like waving the hands going, No, no, no, not eliminate it. She said, Brock, my youngest son had a basketball game. So I said, I said to this guy, I said, I can’t do 11 could maybe do nine or maybe one or something. But I’ve got something I need to do. And he said no one being mean, but it just happened. He said, Can I really can. I’m all tied up. Let’s make it 11 it’s all hung up the phone. Now. This is after 20 years. And it had been building up and I was going I’m not doing what I need to do. I looked at my wife and I said, I quit. And she said she freaked out. You know, she’s, she’s like, No, I’m like, No, no, no, I’m done. I’m quitting tomorrow. And I’m not gonna tell you the whole story. But that night was like a long night. Well, you’re playing these things. Have you ever heard of a guy named Les Brown?
David Ralph [44:19]
Yeah, he’s a motivational speaker.
Robert Mallon [44:21]
Yeah, awesome guy. Well, that day, I’d actually gone to the library. This was in 1996. And I had gotten a Les Brown cassette tape back when there weren’t CDs. And so the next day, I’m driving to go meet with this guy, and I put Les Brown in. And I’m really thinking, I mean, this is a culmination of a couple of years of just being dissatisfied with life. And he’s going, if you can hear his voice, he’s going to have the courage to live your dreams, and I’m going, I’m going to do it. I’m gonna quit right now. And so I get there, and walk in the door and we sit down and we talk for about five minutes and the whole time I’m all I’m hearing from him is like blah, blah, blah. I’m not paying attention to a word. And finally I just said stop. I said, yesterday was my last day. And he like, freaked. His mouth just dropped open because we’d known each other for years. And that was so enlightening. But he, he’s, you know, we talked for about 45 minutes. He says, I don’t take your resignation. Think about it for you take a week off. You need a break. You know, I’m like, nope, that was it. about two hours later, the phone started ringing from our corporate headquarters and they’re saying some of the head people are going Nope, you need to take some time off. We’re not going to accept your resignation. That was the last day I work for them. And that started me on a road.
David Ralph [45:45]
Didn’t you have to work? Well, did did. Did I not notice?
Robert Mallon [45:50]
Well, I wasn’t going to work notice and let me tell you, and I’m talking to your audience now. The worst rudest thing I ever did in my life. was doing that. And if anybody had ever left me without giving notice, I would have been furious. They gave me three months severance, which still blows my mind to this day because they didn’t know me a penny. But I had worked really well for them for 20 years, that stepping over the line, and just making a decision that day, if I had worked, if I had worked two more weeks, or I would have stayed there, and I’d still be working there to be quite frank with you. So in my life, I had to step over the line and the only way I could do it was just, I had to break when I made that decision. And I can look back now, and I can tell you two things that I feel number one, I still feel a little bit of shame because I know some people still with that company, and they’re still friends and they still remember that. But number two, that was the best thing I ever did in my life was walking away and just and I didn’t know what Where the next dollar was coming from. But I knew that I had to make a decision, or I was going to be stuck for the rest of my life.
David Ralph [47:08]
I know that feeling totally Well, I, I basically decided to quit within 10 feet of walking from one desk to another. I just knew that my time was over. But my company kept me there for three months before I left. And until you were talking about event, I’d forgotten this. But on the afternoon, when I left, the whole office stood up and cheered and clapped me out. And I walked out, and I left the door and I cross the road. And literally, by the time I got onto the train to come home, which was about five minutes, it was like, I’d never worked there. It was, it was like, I was so ready for the next stage of my life. I just cleared the decks of my mind. And I used to do training courses where I hadn’t done them for three years and people would say, oh, could you do that? And I think Yeah, I could kind of do that and I’d get it going, and it would just fall into place. I literally can’t remember a word of what I used to do my life was so ready for that next day. So I know exactly how you feel when that decision is ready for you. You cannot fight it, you’ve just got to go with it. And more often than not that enthusiasm but going for it actually helps you out at least in the first few months because you’ve got that adrenaline to really make a go over here.
Robert Mallon [48:17]
Yeah, very much, very, very much. There’s a kind of read something to you real quick that goes right along with this. And some of you this might be exactly what somebody in your audience needs to hear. But But until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative, there is one elemental truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans, that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves to a whole stream of events issues from the decision raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents. meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream, you can begin it. boldness has genius power and magic begin it.
Unknown Speaker [49:16]
It was that Napoleon Hill was that
Robert Mallon [49:18]
I have no idea. I truly don’t know. And I need to look that up. But I use that when when our clients sort of place to where they need to make a decision. And they’re hesitating. And they’re vacillating. And maybe they’ve been doing that for years until they come up. I read that to them. And when they take that step, it’s that whole. The whole thing about a whole stream of events, issues from the decision that you could never have foreseen would have happened, but you have to take that step before all those things can happen, or else you’re just stuck.
David Ralph [49:55]
That’s brings it back Steve Jobs into the show here Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [49:58]
Of course, it was impossible. To connect the dots looking forward when I was in college, but it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [50:33]
Buy into those words, Robert.
Robert Mallon [50:36]
That was a Stanford University commencement speech, right? He said he was a Yeah, yeah, one of the one of the best, by the way, your audience. Watch that on YouTube. I don’t remember when he did that. But that’s one of the best speeches, he read that speech and I as a professional speaker, I say never read a speech. That’s one of the best speeches I ever saw in my life.
David Ralph [50:57]
And if you’re looking for me, go over to Join Up Dots and you’ll see On the mission statement, we’ve got a whole thing tied up there. So did you do see in your whole life now that is a series of dots that have led to where you are now?
Robert Mallon [51:12]
Very much so very much?
David Ralph [51:15]
And what would be your big dot? What would be the one that really has driven you to where you are?
Robert Mallon [51:23]
I would say, a desire and I just think this is this is an inside thing when I was 14 years old. I can’t tell you the name of the book, but I got my hands on a book. And it was about personal growth. And I stayed up all night long, till about five o’clock in the morning reading this book, and it just enthralled me with Wow, there’s more than I thought there could be in life. And so I think that that just started me on a thing of knowing that I could help people to create their extraordinary lives. And I look back at all the dots And all the different times that things like that happen until I got to the point to where, you know, the dot now is I actually get to do that several times a day, and work with people to have those extraordinary lives, but business and personal lives that are just, you know, out there and what most people can only dream of. And so I think, you know, for your audience, just what is it? Where is your passion? And where are your strengths and the intersection of those two is your sweet spot in life, and then go after that no matter what that is just go after that really hard and really strong and make that decision.
David Ralph [52:39]
So if you could only do one of those coaching or the podcast interviewing, you had to lose one which one would you lose?
Robert Mallon [52:47]
I’d definitely lose the podcast.
David Ralph [52:49]
Well, that’s good. It’s less competition for me even that’s what
Unknown Speaker [52:53]
but I’m not gonna lose the podcast. No, no, you can have to about Yeah,
David Ralph [52:57]
yeah, you can add whatever you want. So, so Did you believe just before we send you back in time on the Sermon on the mic to speak to your younger self? Do you believe that everyone out there can have the life that they want? If it’s if it’s down to them?
Robert Mallon [53:12]
Yeah. And also think that it has to be with other people to like unique God, sometimes you can’t see the forest for the trees. And so you have to find the right mentors and coaches in your life to actually make that happen. I don’t think it’s a fluke. I think it’s really a combination of synergy with other people.
David Ralph [53:31]
I believe that’s true. Yeah, absolutely. I would say that in any form of life or business, whatever. It’s your connections with other people. That is the true Rocket Power for everything. And if you manage to build those interactions into something valuable by you, providing more valuable value than you’re getting back, then you can’t lose. I really don’t think you can lose. You just have to keep doing it, doing it doing it until you find that connection with somebody. actually puts a socket in the wall and then suddenly you’ve got power and you saw move forward.
Robert Mallon [54:06]
Yes, very much.
David Ralph [54:08]
Well, this is the end of the show. So and this is the part where we’re going to send you on a journey back to speak to your younger self. And if you could go back and speak to the young Robert, what age would you choose? And what advice would you give? Well, we’re gonna find out, because we’re gonna play the theme tune, and when it pays you out, this is the Sermon on the mic.
Unknown Speaker [54:32]
With the best bit of the show.
Unknown Speaker [54:39]
Robert Mallon [54:50]
this is my 60 year old self speaking to my 24 year old self in 1979. And what I’m going to say to myself would be At 24 years old, you’re living right now in a comfort zone. And that comfort zone is about six feet wide. If for some reason you’ve stepped right into the middle of it, and you don’t want to take a chance, and you’re doubting yourself, because you’re afraid that people are going to laugh at you if you fail, and what I’m going to suggest to you, Robert, is that you actually take your right foot, and you put it right outside of that comfort zone, keep your left foot inside, that’s perfectly fine. But what I want you to do is I want you to actually ask and go after and ask for things that you sincerely want in quit waiting for things to happen. And what you’re going to see that’s going to happen is that comfort zone is going to get a little bit bigger. And then I want you to take that right foot and I want you to stick it back out outside of it and do something that’s outside of your comfort zone and just let it grow and continue to grow and continue to grow. And looking back over those almost 40 years now, I say that every time I got out of my comfort zone, it was when I had the most growth in life. And so I’m going to suggest to you don’t wait till you’re 30. Don’t wait till you’re 40 do it now and get the very best mentors that you possibly can seek them out and talk to them. And just ask their advice and ask them to spend a little bit of time with you in speaking to your life, because you need that. And that’s going to help you grow. So you’re going to do fine, Robert, you’re going to end up okay, and you’re going to have a wonderful life and a wonderful wife and great kids and a great granddaughter right now. And it’s all going to be good, but man, quit fearing. It’s okay. Take care of son.
David Ralph [56:50]
Robert, what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you and of course the rusty line.
Robert Mallon [56:57]
Actually, I’ve got a gift if it’s okay. I’d like to give your audience they can reach me at Robert at rusty lion academy.com or go to rusty lining academy.com. And just, you know, take a look there, you can connect with us here. But if it’s okay, I didn’t ask you before, maybe I should have David but we put together a little present for them. And we’ve got about a 45 minute video on goal setting, and they don’t have to do anything for it. But if they go to rusty lion academy.com forward slash Join Up Dots, we’ll have that ready for them. They can download that video and I guarantee you, that will be the best goal setting training they’ve ever had. And it’s going to talk about the different parts of their life that they can go after with goals, but most specifically how to set goals that actually work and how their minds work. So that their subconscious has helped them with with it too. So is that okay?
David Ralph [58:00]
That’s just did it. Oh, that’s okay. I cos it is. That’s brilliant. So we’ll have all the links on the show notes. And Robert from the bottom of my heart. Thank you so much for spending time with us today. joining up those dots Please come back again when you have more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the best way to build our futures. Mr. Robert Mallon, thank you so much.
Robert Mallon [58:21]
Cheers, my friend.
David Ralph [58:24]
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