Beating The Fear With Leisa Peterson

Beating The Fear With Leisa Peterson Is Todays Join Up Dots Podcast

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Introducing Leisa Peterson

Beating The Fear expert Leisa Peterson is todays guest joining us on the Steve Jobs inspired Join Up Dots podcast.

She is a great friend of the show and has an amazing story that has powerful situations, dots and challenges that have led to where she is today.

You see she has had three stages of success from working  22+ years n the world of finance, pouring herself into earning a high salary, collecting great bonuses and moving up the ladder.

Then becoming a millionaire and continuing to work towards more and more like her life depends on it.

Then after facing a major life crisis followed by several tragedies, she moved towards answering the question of could she ever have both inner fulfilment and outer wealth.”

As she says “True freedom comes as a result of improving how you feel about yourself.

Many people lose out on money, time and opportunity every day because they don’t understand how to shift the inner narrative that impacts their their peace of mind.

Which became the focus and direction of her successful coaching business, she sold her long time home, moved to Hawaii got bored, came back to Arizona and started something new.

So with all this movement and action taking, how does she know that she is now travelling the right course in her life?

And does she get excited by the road she is travelling all the time, or are there still “Wow, I am so unsure of this” moments, lets just sit on the sofa and do nothing today times?

Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Leisa Peterson

Show Highlights

During the show we discussed such weighty subjects with Leisa Peterson such as:

Leisa shares why it is so important to discover what you don’t know you don’t know as soon as you can to then find the answers you need.

We talk about truly being focused on what’s inside us to make the abundance of wealth come into our lives quicker than ever.

Leisa reveals that we have to know where our patterns and beliefs start and truly ask ourselves how to then start a new story.

and lastly……

Why huge things can happen simply by gaining accountability in our lives. We make it happen so start making the right decisions

How To Connect With Leisa Peterson

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Return To The Top Of Beating The Fear With Leisa Peterson

Full Transcription Of Leisa Peterson Interview

Intro [0:01]
Life shouldn’t be hard life should be a fun filled adventure every day. So now start joining up dots tap into your talents, your skills, your God given gifts and tell your boss, you don’t deserve me. I’m out of here. It’s time for you to smash that alarm clock. And start getting the dream business and life you will, of course, are dreaming of. Let’s join your host David route from the back of his garden in the UK, or wherever he might be today with another JAM PACKED episode of the number one hit podcast. Join Up Dots.

David Ralph [0:40]
Yeah, good morning to you. Good morning to you. Good morning to you and welcome to Join Up Dots. Thank you so much for choosing us as your podcast, listen to this morning. Well, today’s guest is joining us on the show for a third time. She’s She’s a great friend of the show. And she’s a great friend of mine. And she has an amazing story that has powerful situations, dots and challenges that led her to where she is today. You see, she’s had three stages of success from working 22 plus years in the world of finance, I know she doesn’t look old enough, pulling herself into earning a high salary, collecting great bonuses and moving up the corporate ladder, then becoming a millionaire and continuing to work towards more and more like her life depended on it. But after facing a major life crisis, followed by several tragedies, she moved towards answering the question and you have inner fulfilment and outer wealth Can you can you have both? Because she says true freedom comes as a result of improving how you feel about yourself. Many people lose out on money, time and opportunity every day, because they don’t understand how to shift the inner narrative that impacts their peace of mind, which became the focus and direction of a successful coaching business. And when she sold her longtime home, she moved to Hawaii, she got bored, she came back to Arizona. And then she started something new. And we’ve always movement and action taking, I guess how does she know? She’s travelling the right course in her life? And does she get excited by the road? She is travelling all the time. Still, Wow, I’m so unsure of his moments. Let’s just sit on the sofa and do nothing at times. Well, let’s find out as we bring onto Join Up Dots the one and only Leisa Peterson Hello, Leisa, how are you?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [2:24]
Hello, David. I’m very well. So happy to be here.

David Ralph [2:28]
It’s lovely to have you. I didn’t know where you were you were going to be there. As I was doing that introduction. My system was going crazy buttons were flashing all over the place. And I thought am I talking to myself but you’re here you’re here in person, you’re on the show for a third time. Now. We connected back in 2014 we realised and venue was on episode 505. Is it a walk in the park all this entrepreneurship?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [2:57]
No, I can’t even imagine what a walk in the park might be like, when you own a business. So no, it has been

David Ralph [3:06]
fun or arduous. When when when you look at it because it is when ladies have babies. And they’re screaming and they’re sweaty, and they look like they’re having a terrible time. And then three years later, they do it all again. And you can’t Why? Why? If it was so painful, why I do it again. Now you’ve done sort of multiple businesses. So is it the case of once you get far enough away, you can’t remember the pain and you just remember the good times and what what keeps them dragging you forward.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [3:37]
Think that you do forget the struggles. And I think that when we are here in this life to make a difference, you know, share the experiences that we’ve had along the way and hopes that it’s going to change someone’s life for the better, like hearing about your struggles and how you overcame them. And then, you know, for me watching the things that have happened in my community and the people that I have been teaching or coaching along the way, it kind of erases all the hardship and like focus on is wow, this is really this is helping and it’s giving great meaning to my life, which is something that I didn’t really have when I was in financial services.

David Ralph [4:24]
Well, why not? Because so many people you know, the majority of wealth that is there meaning just climbing up the corporate ladder to get that corner office, maybe that that young, sexy looking secretary and, and everything else that comes with it. So why was that? Not your calling?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [4:42]
I think that I had a sense from a really young age that I was here to do something and it wasn’t going to be the thing that everyone else was doing. It was going to be disruptive it was going to be different. It was going to allow these kind of quirky parts of myself to come I’m into the world proudly. And when I was working in, in the corporate world, you know, it isn’t like that, like I did a lot of stuff that didn’t fit in the box, don’t get me wrong, and it actually helped me. But it also hurt me too. Because when you do things that are different than everyone else, I kind of had a target on my back. And I dealt with a lot of like, weird stuff going on where I think it threatened people, it’s like, why are you doing it differently? You need to do it this way. And I would, I would face a lot of struggle in that. And there and so there was a bigger part, like, Okay, I’m testing it here in the corporate world. But I know there’s so much more. And it wasn’t until I started my business. And I started doing quirky stuff, where I’m taking, you know, financial services and the relationship that people have with money. And then I was bringing all this more woowoo stuff into it, which is got is what got me super excited, like, how could we take something that is so important in our world, and also so manipulated and abused, and you know, money, just Oh, my gosh, I mean, it really does rule the world in certain ways. And so I wanted to see if there was a way to help people have a better relationship with money and have more fun with money. And one of the ways I did that was showing how money and the way that you experience, money is merely a reflection of how you think about yourself, and the relationship you have with yourself. And so I was bringing all these different concepts into the world of money. And in the beginning, I was a total weirdo. And you were so nice, David, like you reached out to me early on, and I was like, if David is willing to have me on his podcast talking about these weird things, then maybe what I’m doing is worthwhile. And you helped me keep going. So I wanted to say that. Appreciate you,

David Ralph [6:50]
I appreciate you, because I remember watching you and I remember reaching out. And it was the weird thing that I didn’t quite understand, but intrigued me because I felt like she’s onto something here. It doesn’t quite fit with me, it probably would fit with me a lot more. Now. If I watched it now i’d can’t understand it. But I couldn’t quite grasp what you was doing. But it felt right somehow it because it is true. And we say the time and time again on Join Up Dots. And it’s one of those things that until you understand it, you’re never going to understand it. But success comes from within it comes from from you defining yourself and making peace with yourself before anything external, isn’t it?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [7:38]
Let’s definitely and I think that when I came out and started the business, and I started sharing these things, for me, it was all about like, keep going, even if people don’t understand like, there is a good chance that it’s just gonna take you a while to keep showing it in different ways. And eventually the world well understand. And it’s so funny because when I did start this whole thing of money mindset and talking about relationship with money was non existent. And, you know, now it’s everywhere, at least from my perspective, or my vantage point and, and the ability to bring those that unique perspective that only I had in the world into a business and kind of make up a business from thin air was something that I didn’t know if I could do and ultimately I was able to prove that it was possible and and that was what was so fulfilling.

David Ralph [8:34]
Gabbard claimed recently, people go because what we’re doing, Lisa, what we’re doing, we’re connecting with people that were first on the show 10 years ago to see what they’re doing now. And a lot of them a significant proportion of them had an idea, a concept, but didn’t quite believe in it enough. Until about 10 years later, it became a movement. I was talking to a lady the other day just off the top my head. And she was she called herself a joy coach, she taught you how to be happy. And now you’ve got the happiness movement and you’ve got this movement, you’ve got that movement, and people kind of understand the concept. And she sort of says, If I had really nailed it, I would have been the sort of the forefront I would have been the defining I would have been the Oprah of joy. Now you would assume you as a kind of before everybody else got on board. Do you feel like you went half way? Do you think that really you should have just stayed totally firm? Or do you think you did you did your best at that time?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [9:38]
I think I did the best that I could at that time. I mean, one of the things about business ownership is you’re for me, I was maturing and growing up alongside of building the business. I mean, I didn’t know what I didn’t know and there was so much to learn not just about running a business but about myself and who I was Was I going to be as I showed up in the world in a way that you know, I hadn’t even ever thought of. And so there was so much growth, I feel like I did a great job. And honestly, I think the ability to have published the book, the mindful millionaire, at the time that I did, like it was, there was just a window of opportunity. And, and I was able to go through that. And the book is so fascinating, because I feel like it’s doing it’s making a bigger impact two years after it was published than it did when it first came out. It’s like continuing to grow. And I think that’s because, you know, sometimes we’re so ahead of where people are, that it’s kind of out there doing its own work now and meeting people where they’re at? Well, that’s, that’s

David Ralph [10:45]
the visionary aspect, isn’t it on entrepreneurship, because everything is created first in our brains and our minds and our hearts, and then we start getting it out into the world. And sometimes it takes a while for people to say, Oh, I understand it. Now. You know, I truly understand it. Now. What I loved what you said is there was a time that you didn’t know what you didn’t know. And that is one of those problems, I think, new entrepreneurs struggle with, they feel like there’s a blueprint, I feel like there’s a step by step process. And yes, you can get a mentor, you can get a coach, you can get someone to say no, actually, what you need to do is do it this way and move that way. But there’s still loads of I don’t know what I don’t know until I find out but I don’t know it moments. When was the last time you had one that you sat down and thought, Oh, my God, oh, my God, this, this is a big sort of blind spot in my knowledge

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [11:46]
on a daily basis. I mean, I just had something happen this week, where I do co like CO marketing or affiliate marketing, with folks who want to market to my audience, and I want to market to their audience. And we figure out a way to, you know, share with each other. And I listened to an interview of tad Hargraves, who is a very respected coach marketing for hippies. And he said a few things about how he engages in that process. And I was like, how could I have missed that, like, that seems so basic, that seems so important. And yet I haven’t been doing that. And now that he shared it with me, I’m like, I want to do that like, and what I would say it ties into like our values, like he was expressing something that I deeply value, but because I had never thought of it that way, I didn’t realise that something I was doing in the past wasn’t in alignment with my values. And I feel like that’s what happens, you know, from time to time is more like, wow, I don’t think I understood how important values are when I first started my business. And I would go and hire a coach, because they were the one out there, they kept showing up, they seemed like they really knew what they were doing. But I didn’t spend enough time getting to know like, are their values and align with my values. I didn’t even know what my values were. And so in the beginning, I think I hired wrong people and did things that weren’t so beneficial for me and for my business. In the long run. They worked, but they didn’t feel good. And I think that that’s the thing that I continue to learn, like, how can we feel really good about the things that we’re doing in our business that are life sustaining, are life giving, rather than life draining?

David Ralph [13:41]
It’s interesting, you say that, because I now remember, I think the last time we spoke wasn’t on a podcast, it was just sort of personally, and you was thinking of signing up a business coach programme for about $8,000. And I said, Don’t do it, don’t do it. You know, you’ve got all the answers already. You don’t need to do it. And that is a big sort of problem, isn’t it? There’s so many people out there saying that they’ve got the answers. But we don’t actually ever think if it’s the right answers for us, we just think that it’s it’s going to work. And I was watching something on YouTube the other day, and the guy was basically saying the killer of dreams is competition. We start looking around and because the competition are doing the same things, we do the same things. We think it’s the only way. But by actually stopping and allowing those people to move away from us. We give ourselves clear space to sort of create our own path and then success becomes quicker. Would that would that sort of resonate with you as well, Lisa?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [14:44]
And her percent? Yeah. And I think that this has been something that like finding the balance of here’s someone who is a great teacher who has skills that I’m interested in learning. There’s nothing wrong with that. Like I’ve I’ve had incredible opportunities to learn things and pay people for that assistance. But like you said in that conversation, there’s so much that we already know. And sometimes we might be just trying to make a decision because we think we don’t know. But we really do. And can we have a real good practice of discernment of like, what’s the difference? When is it helpful? And when does it actually not really do the things that you were hoping it was gonna do?

David Ralph [15:31]
So just in case, we haven’t made it clear what you actually do? That’s this frame your work? Because you are we talk on the show about the pivot. And literally, every time I speak to you, you’re pivoting in some degree, either, personally or professionally. But what does it actually mean, at its core essence. So the listeners understand about knowing yourself, if you’re going to vein B. Alba, to bring the abundance of financial wealth into your life? What what are those obstacles we’re actually talking about?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [16:08]
So the things that I’ve been teaching, all along, have been about going within to get the answers that we’re seeking. So it’s exactly what you were telling me to pay attention to. Back in that conversation. Like, that’s the theme. But the thing with money that continues to, you know, confuse a lot of folks is, is that we all have ideas of what we want. And you know, it may not be materialising and so what do we do about that? How do we, how do we handle that, and at its most basic level, money is really simple. You either make more money, or you spend less, right? I mean, the it’s, it’s not that complicated. But but because of the beliefs that we have about money, oftentimes, we don’t take it to the most simplistic, we really get complicated, and we start focusing on all the things that we are not, or all the things that we don’t have. And as a result of that, we go down a path of what’s called scarcity mindset, we have tunnelling, so we only see one possibility, like in the case of you helping me, the only possibility at that moment I was seeing is I need to hire this person, because they have something I don’t have. And so I was trapped in kind of that Kundalini experience. And we all do this, but but the challenge is, is, can we, you know, have a practice where reach out to a friend, you know, pause, breathe, take some space, a good good friend of mine has a rule that, that I love that it’s like, if you want something, make sure that you give it at least 72 hours, like do not make that decision until 72 hours has passed. And then you can go back and decide, you know, because you’re gonna come from a very different place. So my headphone dropped out. Does that does that make sense? I mean, I’m trying to help people become more aware of their patterns and their behaviours, around money. So that instead of it controlling them, they are the controller of those thoughts and behaviours.

David Ralph [18:34]
And that’s it. Because I’m very aware, I am extremely aware now that a lot of my money issues comes from the fact but my mum told me ever since I was a small child, but they were skinned. And, and they had no money at all. And now, I have legal control of all my parents finances, because they’re getting old, and then not very well. I got loads of money, they got money everywhere. But she was always saying we haven’t got money. We haven’t got money. So I actually had this thing in my head. But I know I say it even though I have money in the bank, even though I have money in these investments. I always say to myself, No, I haven’t gotten the money. I haven’t got any money. Is it as simple as knowing where these beliefs come from? Or is it something that I’m missing? Should I just go around and shoot my mom and say You’re to blame? Or should I do something else?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [19:29]
Or you shouldn’t do that. Awareness is the first step. You got to know where your patterns lie and what behaviours are doing or you’re not going to be able to change them. And then, you know, each of us are so different. We’re wired differently. Some of us for me, in my case, I feel like there is a mystical aspect of life that is way beyond the urine now and what I can see, and that mystical will kind of awareness when when I bring that together with these beliefs that I become aware of, I’m able to see beyond through practices through breath, work through breakthrough work through all different sorts of things. I’m able to witness the story that I have adopted for whatever reason, I don’t hold anyone responsible, including myself, I just say, Oh, look, this is, this is what you believed. And then I began the pathway saying, Well, what if I were to let all of that go? Forgive, release, you name it. I mean, there’s so many things we can do, and no longer adopt that as a truth in my life. And I’m saying it this way, right now, very logically, but I’m going to tell you, David, if there isn’t an emotional release, you and I both know, it’s not going anywhere, there’s going to be tears, there’s going to be sadness, there’s going to be a sense of like, gosh, I’ve wasted all this time, you know, believing this thing. There might be there might be just, you know, going back Memory Lane, what you do through your podcast, like looking back and, and healing that that little girl or that little boy, in that, hey, you know, I’m so sorry that this happened. But in that moment, you adopted a whole belief system just because of this one thing that happened to you. And maybe it was reinforced, but still it started somewhere. And that is okay, that you did that. But you don’t have to believe that story anymore. And through the course of of that process, what’s happened for me time and time again, is I’ve let go of those stories. And I’ve reinvented or reframed or renewed my perspective on this thing. And when I really let go of it, and I forgive myself, I forgive others. All of a sudden, I’m like, I can’t even remember what those things were anymore. Like, they just, they exit.

David Ralph [22:01]
It’s really interesting that you’re you’re bringing this up, because I’m talking about breath work, I started doing something called Yoga Nidra, which I’ve been talking about on the show, because I think it’s really, really important. And I think people should at least come over to YouTube and sort of have a look at it and just try it once to see how it works. And it’s a deep meditation, breathing exercise. And when when I started doing it, Lisa, I started getting thoughts from way back in the day come into my mind. And a lot of them were that kind of embarrassing, horrible ones. I just want to go down the ones that come up and you kind of blush. And you think, oh god, yeah, I remember that. And you sort of, and I was talking to a lady on the show. And she said, Imagine you sort of just put them in a balloon and let those boats float away. And I kind of thought, yeah, okay, it’s not going to work. But I have been trying to do that and sort of letting them go. And although they’re still with me, I’m not finding the emotional connection as strong. I’m not feeling that blush come through me. I’m not feeling that embarrassment. So we have got that ability to reprogram ourselves just by going. It is what it is. It was what it was just let it go and move on.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [23:20]
Yeah. And sometimes for me, I needed I did need help to learn how to do this, David, like, I don’t know that I would have been able to get out of my stories in the beginning. And this is where coaching can help people. Because it’s not that you become dependent on the coach, but you start to learn the process that they’re taking you through over and over every time you want to let a story go. And I My hope is not everyone realises they have this power. So maybe if you’re listening to this right now, you’re just like, Oh, you mean, I could be the one doing this for myself eventually? And my answer is, yes, the goal is, is that you start to learn how the stories no longer have to dictate your life. And when you catch them, you can go into them and you can say, gosh, you know, like, why is that coming up? Why is that such a problem? Why are you so irritated about this? And you can go deeper and I love yoga nidra to like help you go deeper because you’re reaching more of the subconscious aspects of the mind when you’re really really relaxed. But you can ask yourself like why are you giving your such yourself such a hard time? Or why are you so critical and judgmental of other people? When this thing happens? What’s going on? What what story are you holding on to that is causing so much pain when this thing happens for you? And before you know it the story starts to come out just like you said and you’re like oh my gosh and you will get hot you know you get the hot flash you feel is you know, maybe a flash of shame, or guilt or you know, some kind of feel laying that’s very low on the vibrational scale that causes you to be like, Oh, I really don’t want to remember that. But if you stick with it and you have compassionate with yourself in that moment, that’s all that you never got back, then you just made a story, you were really hard on yourself, you’re like, I have to do it this way. But now you can look back and be like, Oh, girlfriend, I love you so much, I see how you would have interpreted it this way. But right now, I’m just gonna say you’re good. Like, you are good, you are trying the best that you could. And you don’t have to live in fear of this anymore. You know, you get to let it go.

David Ralph [25:37]
So here we are. First off, are we saying Ben because I was down the pub the other day. And my wife is the manager of this pub. And so I don’t go down there very often, because it’s her work environment. But I was down there the other day. And this basically, drunk man came in, he looked like he’d been on Crystal maps, you know, he looked terrible. And instantly, you looked at him and thought you shouldn’t be drinking, you shouldn’t be about you should be in hospital, he looked at and looked into my old state. And my wife sort of dealt with him. And they got him out of the pub, and on the on his way he went. But he basically in the three minutes, he was there, told us that his life was terrible. Everybody was to blame, he’s going to come back and set fire to this pub, he’s going to do and it was all other people, other people, other people, there wasn’t one part. Until he said, perhaps the drinking is not helping me. And I thought, there you go. That’s the first bit of you taking control of your story and changing it around, you’re realising that you’ve got something that you can control. And I almost went and gave him a hug, but I didn’t because he was so horrible looking. But um, it was one of those moments that I thought to myself, it is, it’s those moments when we realise that our story can be changed, we just need to make that decision to have another start of the story chapter two.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [27:05]
Mm hmm. Yeah. And then, and love is gonna get us there. So in that moment, when he said that you felt whether you realised it or not a sense of love and connection to him. And that’s the same kind of love and connection, you feel to yourself, David, like we are, we are always going to be first. And how we feel about ourselves. And that loving relationship that we feel for ourselves is going to, if we’re lucky, and we keep working on it, it’s going to transfer out to everywhere, everyone at some point, and you got a glimmer of it in that moment. And I think that this work we’re talking about helps us to, like when I’m struggling with someone or something, I’m like, just like me, they’re just like me. And, and when I say that, I’m like, oh, there’s something here for me. What am I ready? What story is inside of me that is causing me to suffer? Just because this person showed up? And is so feels so disruptive? Because, you know, when he walked in? Imagine if all you felt was love for every single person regardless of their situation. You just felt love for them? And I feel like you You did, David, but do you know what I mean? Like it changes everything. In our experience in the outer world when we feel that

David Ralph [28:30]
I don’t think I could feel love for him. I just I was I was I’ll be honest, I was repulsed. I actually thought to myself, Oh, my wife’s wonderful. She just went up there. And she said, Look, I’ll get you a blanket. And let’s sit you down for a moment and make you know, and I just thought, Oh, I think I would, I would have been one of those classic people. But you see on the underground and the tubes where something’s going and you just put your head down because you don’t want to get involved don’t want to get involved. But there was that moment where it cracked. And I still wouldn’t have wanted to get involved. But I just saw humanity in that person. I saw a change of story.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [29:10]
What I call love is that, but I understand you might call it something else. But that moment when you were like I could go give him a hug. That was what I’m talking about.

David Ralph [29:22]
Did I say that? I could go and give him that? Did that come out of my mouth? Because I don’t think he did did it? Did I say that? I want to go and I take it back? Because that’s the last thing that I would have wanted to do. It really is. Right? So let’s look at what life is for the listeners out there. So are we saying Lisa, but if they are poor and they’re struggling? It’s a simple case of understanding what story is making this occur? Because a lot of people out there they will struggle with that concept.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [29:57]
Yeah, and I have absolutely compassion for that. And I feel like that’s what was going on for my parents. And I think it informs a lot of why I do this work. So, yes, you’re right. It isn’t, it doesn’t seem that simple. In the beginning, it seems like crazy talk. But when we, when we at least ask ourselves, like, Why do I suppose, you know, my life looks the way that it does, versus, you know, my friend who maybe doesn’t struggle with money, when we are willing to go down that rabbit hole, not, we don’t have to go too far we just go a little bit, we will begin to understand that there is a feeling of like, this is happening to me, rather than for me. And as long as we feel like the world and our circumstances are happening to us, we will remain a hostage to that perspective.

David Ralph [31:05]
Now, the knowing that it’s happening for us, is something that comes with experience, it comes with a certain amount of kicks in the testicles that you have to go through in life. But it comes to a point where you go, I’m not going to be kicked anymore. I’m this is enough. Did you think because I think personally, I had to be beaten up, broken down, spat around a bit, and then rebuilt as a different version of myself before. You know, I saw a guy that I haven’t seen for years and years and years, the other day. And he said to me, Well, you’ve changed over the years. And I thought, Well, when I knew you are 17, and now I’m 53, I’m going to have change. But then I thought, well, maybe people don’t maybe it’s just because of the experiences that I’ve had, that has made me sort of ready for the next stage of accepting totally what what you’ve said. So do people need to have you know, fat moment of I need to change to make your coaching make sense to them?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [32:14]
I can’t speak for anyone else. But myself. But I do

David Ralph [32:17]
I do all the time. I’m always speaking to other people.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [32:23]
Just like you said, I mean, I had to be be beaten to a pulp. I mean, the reason that you have me on the podcast, or one of the reasons was I had a story of, of incredible difficulty that I shared, you know, back on our first conversation, and then that horrible situation brought me to my knees, and I had that moment where we would prefer that it never has to happen. But it did massive pain and suffering, where I said, Oh, my gosh, I am not this fear. I feel like I’m this fear. I feel like it’s just envelope in me. But like I could see, it was so bad that I refused to allow myself to be living in that state of fear at that level anymore. And that was that was the beginning of this journey for me. Once I, I had to hit that rock bottom place to say, oh, my gosh, this isn’t working. And and up until that moment, I still very much felt like I was a victim to circumstance.

David Ralph [33:30]
So So Is it fear, then I think that’s probably isn’t it. It’s the fear of changing our situation is a fear of what our peer group will say it’s a fear of, you know, I remember starting Join Up Dots. I launched a podcast, I didn’t want anyone to listen to it, because I was slightly embarrassed. I look back on it, I think weird concept. I launched the podcast, but didn’t actually want anyone to hear it. But there was a fear. There was a fear of me changing from the person I was before. There was a fear of other people who used to know me going, what’s he doing? What’s he doing? Well, you know, because it was something different. Nowadays, everyone’s got a podcast. So it’s not about different. But do you think it is at the people have to understand, but wherever they are, the results they’re getting? are because of a certain amount of fear in one direction. Is that the true obstacle?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [34:28]
I think so. I think so. Not, I’m

David Ralph [34:30]
good. I’ve condensed everything into one moment.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [34:37]
Yeah. And when we have our biggest breakthroughs, when we get into it, you know, like we were talking about earlier, when we dive in, we’re going to be like, Oh, that was the thing that I was afraid of, like it shows itself and once you see that, you’re like, well, that’s silly, like even that just understanding what’s going on. Hear, right? What am I so afraid of here? And sometimes it helps to ask that question. But sometimes it’s too direct. That’s why there’s lots of different ways we can go about finding it. But we’re like, because when I asked that question sometimes to people, especially men, I think there’s this real big fear sometimes of like, not being vulnerable, like, I’ve got this, I’m good, everything’s fine. Everything is awesome. And I’m like, Okay, we cannot talk about fear, because fear just makes them shut down. It doesn’t actually open us up. Does that make sense?

David Ralph [35:33]
Lindsey does. It’s funny, just before we started on this podcast, I messaged a guy that I know who I’ve been connected with for about five or six years, and I’ve never met him, I’ve never met him, I was on the way to meet him once, when a guy threw himself in front of a train in front of me and killed himself, which is, you know, it was a big sort of like, a defining moment in my life. I’ve never actually met him, but he’s a kind of is a Jiminy Cricket. He’s a little conscience. And I just messaged him and said, you know, that bit of work I’ve been putting off, I’m doing it tomorrow. I’m starting tomorrow, because I realised that there’s been this thing hanging over me that I’ve been finding excuses not to tackle. And on the podcast, in many ways, it might sound where I just come up with an idea, I crack on with it, and away we go. But this one thing, because it was a different environment that I wanted to move into, it has been holding me back. So I actually had to put the intention out and say to him, I’m starting tomorrow, so that I wake up the next morning and think, Okay, I’ve told somebody, I’ve got to do it. So is that a good way for people to sort of have a wherever they reach out to someone, or they email me and say, Tomorrow, I’m going to change or I email you, or, or whatever Is it as simple as that setting that intention to at least start?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [37:00]
I think that’s a great idea. You know, in my programmes, we got a weekly accountability, where we’re not focused on like, big, huge projects, we’re just focused on, what’s the tiniest of thing that you’re going to agree to do between now and next week. And we’ve noticed huge things happen for people because just by saying to a group of people, this is what I’m going to do, it gets the motion going. And I think so much of, of what we’re talking about here, like the fear holds us back. And when you tell a group of people like, Oh, I’m gonna do this, and I promise to do it by next week, and you’re gonna see all those same people. There’s actually data about how powerful this is like, it takes your success rate from like, maybe 10%. I’m just having an idea, I’m going to do this. And then when you go through you, you put it on your calendar, you tell a group of people, you make a commitment, you decide exactly what you’re going to do, like all the things that you do, around that thing leads to like a 95%, accountability, like success rate. So yes, I’m going to say science supports exactly what you’re saying, David?

David Ralph [38:14]
So Why will people not do that? Because I’ve sent that out. Now join up dots@gmail.com Tell me what you’re going to do. And we’ll keep you accountable. Alright, guarantee, even though 1000s and 1000s of people listen to this podcast, 1000s and 1000s of people will understand what we’re talking about, and they’ve got something in their life, but they want to sort of start going but I’m not really sure they won’t. I reckon I get three emails, maybe two, maybe one. And that is me testing my own email system. See if it’s working.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [38:49]
i The question is, why won’t they do it?

David Ralph [38:51]
Yeah. Because I know they won’t. I know they won’t.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [38:58]
Yeah. I don’t know why they won’t do it. But I just know, it’s so good. When you do like, it’s, I think that one of the joys of life is being proud of yourself and being able to trust yourself. And so there’s so many reasons to do it. And maybe that’s all I can offer is like you I think each of us and this is what business ownership has done for me is it’s allowed me to trust myself in ways that I didn’t even know I wasn’t trusting myself or to believe you know, that I could set a goal and then actually achieve it like writing a book. Oh, good gut, you know, I wrote like a million words to get to the 90,000 words, like, I didn’t know I had that in me. I wasn’t a very good writer. And if I hadn’t just and even my agent who said you’ve got some good ideas like I’d love to help you. I said, Well, I’m not that great of a writer. She’s like, I know, she said that, but I will be here for you. I will help You can get better. You just got to show up over and over and over again. I was like, Okay, well you believe in me, and I’m gonna try and believe in myself. And at some point, I was like, Oh my gosh, I’m a writer. But only after showing up over and over and over for myself, did it actually happen? And honestly, like, I think the greatest aspects of life is when we show up for ourselves over and over again, and all of a sudden, we’re like, wow, we just have this different sense of confidence. It’s coming from a true place of like, I did it.

David Ralph [40:31]
I mean, it builds up, doesn’t it? You know, before I started recording a podcast, I wasn’t a podcaster. Now, it’s what I do. You’re an author, where it’s just putting one word after another, it’s recording one, mp3 file and putting out to the world. Every single person ends up somewhere, some people end up as Elvis some people end up as Richard Branson, some people end up, but I guarantee Elvis would have sat on his bed thinking, I’m not getting anywhere. Nothing’s happening here. I might as well give up. Richard Branson would have had the same thoughts. Everybody is surrounded by these beers of can I make this happen? Will it happen? What happens if it does happen? Now, that’s a weird one, when you do start to get successful, and you start to almost self sabotage, I’ve had a couple of times where I’ve, I’ve kind of didn’t like the success I was getting, which is once again, Scaredy pence time, isn’t it?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [41:31]
Yeah. Oh, yeah. This is where I like alter egos. Like, when my book was coming out. I was like, I’m not an author, how do I start seeing myself as an author, you know, or a successful author or a best selling book author. And I had to come up with like this really silly, Alter Ego. And I was like, oh, I’ll just be that in because I don’t know how to make Lisa into an author. But I can play with this idea. And it was, Do you want me to tell you what it was? It’s

David Ralph [42:02]
tennis. No one’s listening. They said, No one’s

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [42:06]
Well, Todd Herman, one of my friends and coaches, he wrote a book about alter egos. But in the work that I did with him, I came up with this. And it was like, Okay, well, one of the best selling books of all time about money is, you know, thinking grow rich. And at the time, I think I had recently watched Lady Gaga is maybe her, her very vulnerable show on Netflix about kind of a tour and all of this, and I was like, wow, she shows up with like, these huge audiences. And I decided to like bring the two together. And it was like, Lady Carnegie was the alter ego that I came up with, for like Dale Carnegie and Lady Gaga. And I’m like, this is going to be the person that I’ve envisioned I can step into, and it will allow me to let go of all these silly fears that are like you’re not an author, you didn’t publish a book, even though you had like, all these things needed to go away. And that was a fun way of just saying, Well, what if I was this, and that allowed me to be creative and play and, and just suspend the disbelief and allow something new to come in. And yeah, it helped me.

David Ralph [43:21]
Of course, it helps you it helps you because you are Lisa Peterson. And I love what you do. Because as I say, every time I connect, you’re doing something different. So what’s what’s on your focus? Now what what’s exciting you because it’s different from what you were doing two weeks ago?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [43:40]
Well, I have announced some big news in the past few weeks that I am closing down much of my business, actually. And taking a sabbatical, perhaps retiring, I’m not quite sure what it is. But I’ve been called to let go of what I’ve created and its current form, and take some time to travel the world. And I’m going to Paris soon, which is really exciting. And Bali, and Hawaii, and I’m going to be travelling around the world and allowing what wants to come through next and also taking my business more to us, Eva ceva, like giving I’m taking a lot of the paid content and bringing it to my YouTube channel for free and just figuring out ways that I can give back. Yeah, that’s what’s going on for me.

David Ralph [44:36]
And obviously, the conversation has been about fear. Does that sit really easily 100% with you, or are you kind of all not sure it’s the right decision?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [44:50]
Think that there was fear. I mean, there’s there’s things that happen to us when we’re in the public eye and we’re putting out content and we’re getting that, you know, reentry horseman on a regular basis. And we feel like we’re in the flow of like what’s going on and, and our identity can get wrapped up in that. And so that’s what happened for me is I think that I had to when I made the decision, I was like, Well wait a minute, like who is least second it be if she lets go of all of this? Like, will she even know who she is like, these funny kind of fears would come up like, am I going to be really unhappy and sad and lonely? And is anyone going to want to take my phone call ever again? Those sorts of stories, and I was like, Oh, wow. So I had to sit and watch. And just like we’ve been talking about like, one by one be like, Oh, that’s a funny thought. It’s okay, I can let that go. And now I’m in a place where I’m so excited. And I just, it’s so funny to David, because the more I let go, and you would probably have told me this if I had asked you. But the more I let go, the more things are coming to me. And I’m like, wait a minute, this year, like I’m just letting go. And all of a sudden, all these strange, peculiar, fascinating opportunities appear are appearing and my work is being able to say no to those because they deviate from what I really wanted to do, which is create more space.

David Ralph [46:11]
Yeah, I agree with this. Totally. I’m actually sort of practising Dallas now, which I still find it’s weird to actually say that. And you can be a Taoist we’ve no, you know, you don’t have to go anywhere, you just decide that you’re going to be a Taoist. And one of the big principles is simplicity and patience, and just kind of not forcing something, just just turning up and just doing stuff. And then these opportunities come your way. And if you’ve seen me 10 years ago, compared to the 10 years, and now you know, I feel like I’m retired. I’m not, I’m still doing all the same work. But I do it in such a way now. But it just feels like you know, it’s not something that I do. It’s just something that occurs around me.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [46:56]
I feel so good when you share that. So good.

David Ralph [47:01]
We should be retired, we should sit in a barley bar in the afternoon, drinking cocktails, and just relating to when we were trying to dominate the world, what’s your record?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [47:13]
I think that sounds fabulous. With Paris cafe.

David Ralph [47:18]
Do we do that we will make that happen. Now, what we’re going to do on this end of the show is anyone who comes on the show goes on a journey on the Sermon on the mic when they go back and give advice to their younger self. But as we always like to do when repeat guests turn up, we send you back to the last time he was on the show. And we think it was about five years ago, he was last on the show. So if you could go back to the pre pandemic Lisa Peterson and give her some advice. What would it be? Well, we’re going to find out because we’re going to play the theme. And when it fades, it’s your time to share. This is the Sermon on the mic.

Unknown Speaker [48:01]
With the best bit of the show, the Sermon on the mind the sermon on.

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [48:18]
Lisa, I want you to know that you are in good hands. And that you may not totally know how supported you are and always but you are so divinely guided, that you have nothing to worry about. You may be worried about this book that you’re writing or that’s coming out. Or you may be worrying if you’re going to make enough money in your business or you may be worrying about is your work going to make a difference in the lives of people. But I want you to know that you are good. With your heart in the right place. You care so much about the people that you’re serving. That’s enough. And all those stories that you’re telling yourself of not being good enough or not having enough for, you know, just not measuring up. They are just stories that you can totally let go of, because you are so held in the light and love and that’s enough.

David Ralph [49:21]
Always enough is always enough. So Lisa, I normally say what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you but you’re clearing off you’re going around the world so so how can somebody connect with you if they’re inspired by today’s conversation?

Beating The Fear Expert Leisa Peterson [49:40]
Go into wealth clinic.com forward slash vision. There’s the meditation and the first chapter of my book. And I think that the things that we were talking about today, I mean this this this spirit of why I wrote the book, so if you do know that You’re struggling inside of your relationship with money. Or maybe there’s opportunities to uncover some fear. Because you really like more than than the mindful millionaire book is definitely a great place to begin your journey.

David Ralph [50:14]
We’ll have all the links on the show notes. Lisa, thank you so much for spending time with us today, joining up those dots. And, as always, please come back in, we’ve got more dots to join up, because I believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our paths is the best way to build our futures. Lisa, thank you so much. Thank you, David. So and Lisa Peterson, David Ralph talking about fear and, and rewriting your story, every single one of us has the ability to say, No, whatever my life is, is just that part of the story. I can change it, I can have a new chapter, I can change things around. And it is scary. You know, as I was saying, on the show, there’s things that I’ve been trying to do that have I’ve been held back from for whatever reason. And once you sort of start to think, why is it why am I doing that? You kind of find the answers that you want to make things different and success and wealth and, and freedom. They’re always there for you. But there’s always things holding you back. And a lot of that is personal belief, or I don’t deserve it, or nobody else I know is doing this. Every single person out there who has really done stuff in their lives and you are aware of them. They will have that same story of I didn’t come from that environment where other people did this, or I didn’t know anybody else. It’s stories. And you can change your story. And right a new one. overcome that fear. Put a line under the last bit of text and go again. See again, cheers. See ya. Bye bye.

Outro [51:58]
That’s the end of Join Up Dots. You’ve heard the conversation. Now it’s time for you to start taking massive action. Create your future create your life. Easy only you live God we’ll be back again real soon. Join Up Dots join the gods Join Up Dots John. John Jolina Join Up Dots.