G Brian Benson Joins Us On The Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Podcast
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Introducing G Brian Benson
He is a man who I first saw on YouTube and thought in an instant “I want this guy on Join Up Dots”
But as like most the guests who have made up over 60o conversations, that initial thought of “I like what this guy is doing” only touches the surface of his work.
He is a Writer, filmmaker, actor, TEDx speaker, multiple award-winning self-help author, poet.
He is also a children’s author, radio personality, finisher of over 50 triathlons (including 4 Ironman distance races), cross-country bicyclist and someone that believes in waking people up.
Yes, he is a man with a similar mission to Join Up Dots.
How The Dots Joined Up For G Brian Benson
Come on people, you are only on this planet once, so lets get going.
Lets take a step into the scary zone and see what we can deal with.
In addition to writing, speaking and acting in TV and film, he enjoys creating his own projects that carry inspiring, positive and conscious messages.
His most recent project was the short film Searching for Happiness, which is now online.
This can be watched on his website and YouTube or this page.
The story focuses on an unhappy man, alone and unloved, who struggles to find meaning in his black and white reality.
While over the course of a day, he learns that it is through kindness and our connection to others that we find true happiness.
So how does one man wake up himself to start going after something so much bigger than what one could hope to achieve on their own?
And has he truly found happiness, or is this a search that will never end?
Well lets find out as we bring onto to the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Mr G Brian Benson
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with G Brian Benson such as:
How he remembers getting burned out after working in his family business,.
Knowing he had to make a change (even though he had no idea what that change might be)
Why he was so aware that he had to break out of his comfort zone before creating the life that he wanted, by signing up for speaking and acting classes.
What makes it so difficult to bridge the gap from following your muse into turning it into a full-time income, but is certainly possible if you have the passion.
How he looks back on his life and can see a period that he wasn’t ready for the success that he craved. He had to go past the point and wait for it to catch him up.
G Brian Benson Books
How To Connect With G Brian Benson
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here– enjoy
Full Transcription Of G Brian Benson Interview
David Ralph [0:00]
He asked Hello there and welcome to Join Up Dots. Now in this episode over the last maybe 30 episodes twice, we’ve had issues with recording don’t know why it’s occurring. And we don’t know until we’ve actually finished we record every single show exactly the same way. This is one of those shows and so the guests audio sounds great. Mine sounds a little bit off. Please allow us to sort of put this out to the world because the guest delivers a great one. And we want the world to hear it but apologies about me. Yeah. HOST I don’t sound very good. Cheers. Bye bye.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be but somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling and Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your boy Pray for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [1:09]
Yes. Hello there. Good morning to you. Well, good morning, every single person that listens to Join Up Dots. Maybe you haven’t listened to Join Up Dots before, obviously, how are you listening to it? Now that’s a bit weird. But if you haven’t been Where have you been? Where have you been? Because we’ve been doing some great stuff and the show is going from strength to strength. And that’s all down to you guys sharing in? Well, I can only assume it’s you sharing sitting in the bar next to each other. So I’m getting weird. I’m getting weird. And I think it’s because I have been looking forward to this show for a long time because this is a guy who I saw him on YouTube. First of all, when I thought in an instant I want this guy on Join Up Dots. But as like most of the guests who have made up over 600 conversations our initial fall off. I like what these guys doing only touches the surface of his work. He’s a writer, filmmaker, actor TEDx speaker, multiple award winning self help offer poet children’s auto radio personality finisher of over 50 triathlons Yeah, including for Ironman distance races cross country bicyclist and someone that believes in waking people up. Yes, he’s a man with a similar mission to Join Up Dots that Come on people. Yeah, only on this planet one. So let’s get going Aziz by let’s take a step into the scary zone and see what we can deal with. Now in addition to writing, speaking and acting in TV and film, he enjoys creating his own projects that carry inspiring positive and conscious messages. His most recent project was a short film, searching for happiness, which is now online and can be watched on his website, and YouTube and we’re linked to the show notes as well. Now the story focuses on an unhappy man alone and unloved who struggles to find meaning and he’s black and white reality. Well over the course of a day he learns but it’s true kindness and our connections to others, that we find true happiness. So how does one man wake up himself to start going after something so much bigger than what Most people could hope to achieve on their own and as he truly found happiness, or is this a search that will never end? Well, let’s find out as we bring them to the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Mr. G Brian Benson. I don’t know if I should say, gee, Brian Benson, or how do we go with it?
G Brian Benson [3:22]
You know, I’ve been called many things. Not all, you know, perfect and wonderful, but you can just call me by my middle name.
David Ralph [3:30]
I like the mystique of GE. I sat there for months, trying to work out what G stands for. And when you told me I was a bit depleted, to be honest, it wasn’t as dramatic as I thought.
G Brian Benson [3:45]
Well, I should have said You know, it depends on the day just you know, Mondays it could be gregarious Tuesday’s it could be
David Ralph [3:54]
gorgeous. Yeah, you know, right. glamorous on Wednesday, greedy It’s like a weird Seven Dwarfs we’re doing here.
G Brian Benson [4:04]
Oh my god. Yeah,
David Ralph [4:06]
we could go anywhere with it. Now, as I say, it’s an absolute honour to have you on the show because I have become a fan. I have been going through your work on YouTube. But there’s a lot of stuff on YouTube, which is just rubbish. But yours is quality. Yours is quality from the word go. And I’ll tell you the very first one that I stumbled across, and hopefully you can tell the listeners about how this came to be. But it was a guitar player in Reno or somewhere. Um, and it was it was a remarkable film that I watched and then got involved in your work. So tell me how that film occurred and how you come to get these ideas.
G Brian Benson [4:48]
Sure, thanks for asking, gosh, you know, it’s I’ll try to make this short but seven years ago, I left my family’s business I was just burnt out. We had a golf centre a driving range a retail store in a nine hole par three course. And I ran it had been running it for 11 years and grew up golfing. But I just felt like I was supposed to do something else with my life. I had no idea what that was. But I told my dad and he was okay with it. And it ended up taking another year for me to leave because we decided to sell it and it took a while to list it and find the buyer. So that last year, I was just burnout and wanting to just start my new life, whatever that meant. And I just sat my butt down one day because I was feeling out of balance. And I wrote down five things that I knew that would keep me in balance. And so I just focused on him. It helped. And my intuition said, expand the list and write a book. So I did and, and I self published it. And it was a first thing I you know, I’ve ever tried like that. And it was it was very it was wonderful. It was scary too because I was terrified to be in front of people and I knew that I would need to learn how to to to present it. So, I just did a bunch of things to step out of my comfort zone. One of them was to, you know, take Community College speech classes, I did Toastmasters, I did did a lot of things. And I took an acting class. I never planned on acting, and I wasn’t planning on acting, I just thought it would be a good way for me to kind of break out of my comfort zone. So to answer your question, I had a dream a couple weeks later about the story of the Guitar Man, and I woke up and I wrote it down. I met a young filmmaker a few weeks after that just by accident, and I said, Hey, I got this idea. I have no idea how to make a movie I’ve never acted before. But would you like to do it with me? And he said, let’s do it. So two weeks later, over the course of about four nights, we went down to the streets of Reno, Nevada, and we film Guitar Man, and it just kind of happened. You know, it’s the weirdest thing but it empowered me so much. Because I had never really played guitar in front of it. by either I was a closet guitarist. And so here I was playing guitar and acting at the same time in this short film that kind of has created a little life of its own after the fact. So stepping out,
David Ralph [7:11]
oh, coming out of the closet. I don’t know how I’m supposed to say this, but um, you scare rezone. Um, and it’s a stupid question to ask, but I’m gonna ask it. Is it scarier being in the scary zone looking out, or is it scarier stepping out of the scary zone?
G Brian Benson [7:32]
Wow, okay. Okay, I think I understood what you said, is it scarier being in it? And looking out, you know, I mean, this this whole thing just, it just felt intuitively right. Even though scary to do. I just, I knew that I was supposed to do it. And so I think that just gave me the power and the energy and the trust to step out of my comfort zone in that moment, and it’s kind of been the same for all the other things that I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone for but I You know that that answer
David Ralph [8:02]
is a kind of hypothetical question for the listeners, because we all sit there and we all wish we were doing certain stuff. And we all want to wake up as we said in the introduction and start creating that dream life. But more often than not, we’re kind of stuck in the Oh, I’ll do it tomorrow. Oh, I’d do it the next day. It’s all right the G Brian Batson because he can do all these things. And so it always fascinates me. If once you step out of the scary zone, was it really scary? Is it scary looking out the window at it? Or actually walking out the door? No.
G Brian Benson [8:38]
No, I think I think, you know, you just, it’s not nearly as bad as we think it’s gonna be once you step through that door, you know, and just we just got to trust that and the more we do it, the easier it gets. But but I’ve always found that I when I’m following my intuition, even if it’s scary, I’ve always been supported in you know, anything. number of ways, whether it was meeting the right person to do the project, whether it was, you know, just whatever I mean, it’s just that we have support there, you know, physically and non physically and whatever you want to call it.
David Ralph [9:13]
And I suppose what you’re hinting at is this sort of law of attraction, the fact of going for something bigger than yourself being grateful, and just seeing how things things. Yeah.
G Brian Benson [9:28]
Yes, you know, I, there’s a, at the end of my TEDx talk last year, I think I said something along the lines of I happily expect the unexpected. And I really do, you know, I’m not quite sure where all this is going. But I didn’t know I had, I guess, these creative gifts that are starting to show themselves five, six years ago, I just was kind of working on myself trying to be the best version of myself and they just kind of happened in one thing led to another and I just kind of kept following the breadcrumbs and so You know, it hasn’t always been easy, but and it’s been scary, but it’s at times, but but I just, you know, like you say I just try to try to stay in a mode of gratitude and just unexpect you know, just expect wonderful things to happen, whatever they may be,
David Ralph [10:16]
that’s how life occurs. I and I’ve got some guys coming on the show. I remember having a list of people that I wanted on the show, right at the very beginning, and I couldn’t come near to them. I just couldn’t come near to it. And now they’re being introduced to me. And I kind of think to myself, is this you know, cause and effect? Is it because I’ve recorded and released 600 episodes? Is it the universe having a weird effect, but there’s no getting away from it. If you get off your backside and do stuff consistently? Yeah, weird things happen. And things happen that you kind of it blows your mind. But of course, it’s all those tiny little steps you’ve taken over the last two or three years, but lead to those miracles I suppose.
G Brian Benson [10:59]
Yeah, no, you’re Write it in it is this it’s just a whole bunch of small steps. And, you know, I was just telling people to start moving you know and just to start following the things that make you happy and just doing and without maybe expectation and I kind of all along I kind of felt like I wanted are supposed to maybe do some of these things on a big scale not not egotistically just because I really want to make a difference and try to I know raise the vibration of the planet or whatever you want to call it. It’s make people you know just try to become their authentic selves. And so I I’m just trying to share my journey and be a living example I’m not really trying to tell anybody what to do but but but following my intuition has worked for me and and like you said some of those things. I thought I was ready for a few years ago I wasn’t and so when they didn’t happen, it kind of deflated me. But my my foundation maybe wasn’t where it needed to be to be able to handle a certain project or opportunity or in your case, a guest you know what I’m saying? So, so as we Just keep moving forward, I think is we practice what we preach it just, I don’t know, we get what? It comes to us when we’re ready. Well, let’s
David Ralph [12:09]
take you back in time, then I’m gonna put you in your family business. Okay? So you’re, you’re polishing your balls or whatever you’re doing on a daily basis. Couldn’t have said that better as well. And you are looking out the window thinking there’s more to life than this. Now, many of us get that feeling. Many of us want to do great stuff, but actually translating that great stuff into an income is very, very difficult. Now, was was that a difficult bridge to cross? Yeah, I can imagine you are because a lot of what you’re doing obviously costs a and it needs investment. And it needs support, just to film the search for happiness. I was watching yesterday, as I was saying, searching for happiness. When it was scrolling. I thought, My god there’s about 2530 people involved in this. Now Are they all doing things Because they believe in you, are you paying them? How are you actually translating your your Muse into income?
G Brian Benson [13:08]
Wow, well, it’s an ongoing process and you know, I have a couple of books that are out there that I didn’t really push that much when they first happened because it’s maybe I didn’t believe in myself enough to own them but, but you know, I sell a few books, I speak a little and I’ve got a brand new children’s book coming out in a couple weeks and I’m really excited for and it seems to be getting a lot of having a lot of people excited to to see it. So hopefully that’ll help. But with the films, I’ve just been lucky and found people that maybe were creative and kind of at the start of their journey too, and they were hungry, and we just kind of did them guerilla style and you know, and in the searching for happiness. You know, I just I incorporated I didn’t really audition folks. I just, you know, I met some I’ve been in LA for three years now and I met a lot of really cool people along the way and just kept in touch with them. And when I wrote this, I kanessa you know there’s so and so would be great for this also be great for that and I just invited them and they happily came and you know, I paid for most of it out of my own pocket they you know did it out of the kindness of their hearts so I just you know, maybe pay a little gas money to get in there and some some food on set but they did it for free. And and the young filmmaker who I could not have done it without his name was Matt green. He You know, he had the equipment and he just had a really sharp mind and a good eye for things and so it just, you know, it came together because it was kind of supposed to right.
David Ralph [14:34]
Have you ever had that desire that I’m gonna jump in here because it is my muse. My music is free here. Have you ever had a desire to create a movie? Based on I’m just thinking off the top of my head, maybe a UK podcast, they’re trapped in a house full of supermodels or something has occurred to you.
G Brian Benson [14:54]
Hey, we you know that that that that has crossed my mind before and you know what? Have my people talk to people after the topic call here and maybe we can make something happen. The supermodels part sounds really enticing as
David Ralph [15:07]
an old attraction is working, put myself in that position and miracles. Take that jack Canfield.
G Brian Benson [15:18]
You never know who you’re gonna meet. And so I’m just, I’m open, I’m open to anything. Pretty much
David Ralph [15:23]
looking at your life again. You’re, you’ve done so much in a short period of time, but I can’t quite get the angle of what really lights you up because you are on a mission. You are, you know, creating something that’s bigger than yourself. But where do you when’s it gonna end up? Because at the moment, you know, you’re a writer, filmmaker, actor TEDx blah, blah, blah, blah. There must be something that sort of burns more brightly within that list than anything else.
G Brian Benson [15:59]
I guess I just I’m not quite sure where it’s gonna head but I feel like I’ll be doing a little bit of everything and kind of one thing has led to another which has led to another and there’s a lot of things that will probably hopefully happen then I haven’t really given much thought to yet but yet they’re just a natural progression of what’s happening. And you know, I guess maybe with that comes you know, people that have a little more influence that I can work with that continues to raise the bar and maybe includes some funding for some projects and and you know, to get stuff out on a bigger scale and and so that it’s seen by more people. But I really do enjoy a little bit of everything. It’s a I’m a Gemini, I don’t know what to say it’s just, I would get bored focusing on one thing and you know, I really don’t think too far ahead. I’ve got a few you know, ideas and things that are kind of in the works right now, but you know, that they may be just, you know, last maybe throughout this next year
David Ralph [16:57]
did you meet you have to be surrounded by where you Y’all cuz yo yo in LA. So I imagine you’re surrounded by film crews and things going on on sort of every corner. Now where I live in the United Kingdom. I don’t even see people bringing in camera. It’s just like mobile phones anymore. Do you? Do you have to be in the environment? Is it easy to do what you’re doing because you’re surrounded? Does it make it seem possible before you even start?
G Brian Benson [17:26]
That’s a great question. I just, I don’t I guess. I don’t feel like having that around me necessarily inspires me but I do know that when I have an idea come that feels really right. And I want to do it, there are people that I’ve connected with or will connect with that are at the ready, you know, and that there’s a it’s a very, very talented and creative pond here to find people to work with, or to connect with and so it you know, I guess it does inspire me In that regard that but you know, I’m just kind of do my own thing I take my laptop to my favourite little coffee shop and just kind of work away and connect away and sometimes I work from home but I don’t really surround myself by a lot of
David Ralph [18:14]
folks. And my Dean and I only I’ve spent some time in LA. And I’ve had more people shout at me. I’ve mentioned this a few times on the show, but they’re just yeah, especially down by the Chinese fan. So you just be walking along and some person would just shout at you abuse if it doesn’t happen around the world. What is that about? Brian?
G Brian Benson [18:34]
Yeah, well, I think you were you were there on Hollywood Boulevard. That’s where all there’s you know, there’s a lot of folks who maybe have some some mental issues hanging out down there as well as all the tourists go there. So they’re not necessarily the the bread and butter of La but you know, there’s so many creative people here and everybody’s trying to kind of climb that invisible ladder, I suppose. And I’ve met a lot of really interesting people. Thank goodness I haven’t had met too many knuckleheads I think that’s just because maybe you know, that whole law of attraction thing you bring in what you put out. And so, you know, you can tell, I don’t know, I’m really you know, you just I bring in the right people and I just stay away from those that I don’t really resonate with you saying that
David Ralph [19:18]
I draw the crazies towards me. Is that what you’re saying?
G Brian Benson [19:23]
Maybe a little bit? No, I think, David, I think what it is, is that you were just playing tourists down there on Hollywood Boulevard and you you met some interesting folks,
David Ralph [19:34]
you would be crazy because I actually like the crazies because I think to myself, you know, so many people play the safe card. I like the ones where that’s just think mad and do stuff that isn’t possible and sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t but it it pushes the boundaries of what is possible for the rest of us. Do you get more from the crazies more Eventually, the sort of the stables
G Brian Benson [20:01]
I don’t think so. I mean, I wouldn’t even most people would pay it you know who know me and or follow me maybe from a little bit of a distance probably think I’m a pretty conservative guy and I don’t know, I would like to not think that I’m all that conservative, but I like people watching. But I’m also very comfortable and just kind of taking it easy and hiking and just spent a lot of time and quiet so I’m probably not that crazy, but I’m not afraid to, you know, be creative and make something happen if I feel like it’s supposed to be
David Ralph [20:31]
crazy person’s always gonna save it not crazy. I I think you are crazy. Crazy.
G Brian Benson [20:38]
Okay, okay, well, here. I think I’m late being very late and crazy. And so there’s some craziness that needs to come out. Yeah, let’s just hope I don’t know
David Ralph [20:47]
that’s the spark isn’t it is the spark. That means that you got off your backside and you’ve started to do stuff that wasn’t any reason for it. You just had that feeling inside. We’re going to delve a bit more in Bass straight after these words from Jim Carrey is Jim Carrey my
G Brian Benson [21:03]
father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [21:29]
You might as well take a chance Brian, that’s what he’s saying. And that’s what you did. Isn’t it?
G Brian Benson [21:35]
Dance great. Dance straight now. I love that talk that he gave there. That is so inspiring and it just man it always just makes me well up. Yeah, you know, it was hard for me because there’s I had to deal with a lot of self worthiness issues. And I’m just finally kind of cleaning some of that stuff. And acting is really helped me in that regard. I’ve taken some great classes since I’ve been here with some wonderful teachers who were very intuitive, and put put scripts in my hand that kind of forced me to deal with things in it, you know, and I worked through a lot of things. So I think everybody should take an acting class, but, you know, I just, I’m, I’m pretty driven, you know, it’s it hasn’t.
I don’t know, I just when I was three, I told my mom I was put here to inspire people. And I probably forgot that for a lot of my life. But when I left seven years ago, it just kind of things started happening and kind of I was reminded about that, and, and it’s kind of all coming into play.
David Ralph [22:35]
And that’s the whole sort of tagline of Join Up Dots. At the end. We always say, connecting our panels is the best way to build our futures. And the thing that we we used to talk about it all the time, in the early episodes, how the essence of what you’re like between three and 12, I suppose, is the essence that you need to carry with you into older life Now, one of the first memories I ever had was saying to my mom and I must have been about five, whatever. And I said to him, I don’t do anything good. And she said, you can always make people laugh and smile, and I didn’t think anything of it. But now I can sort of translate that into what I’m doing now and what I’ve done in the past and it’s a kind of almost X Factor quality. So the fact that you are a three year old saying that you want to inspire it makes it almost lunacy but you’ve been go and work with your dad in a golf shop because you know, is just isn’t part of inspiration is it? Yeah, we we lose track of ourselves at the beginning until we find ourselves later. Yeah.
G Brian Benson [23:40]
Amen. You know, when we got to go through things, sometimes the hard way and and and just life really has a way of depending on one situation, but you know, you know, you know, you have a kid and other things happen and need to start doing things that maybe don’t totally resonate with you because you know, you need to provide or what have you and I don’t know, I just, I’ve always tried to be the best version of myself. And thank goodness, it’s led me into a lot of things that I never expected to have happen. And I think, truthfully, and you know this, because you’re doing it, you’re being creative with your show, I think, what if we can tap into our creativity and there’s so many different ways to do it. That is what really can make us feel fulfilled and happy to we need to create and that touches
David Ralph [24:28]
into your film, isn’t it the search for happiness, it’s, it wasn’t that you suddenly won the lottery. It wasn’t the case, you suddenly got a Lamborghini, whatever it was, it was already in you. The search for happiness is about finding the thing but doesn’t cost anything that’s within you and in the field. And everybody go to the show notes because it’s a great little movie. And there’s a lovely sort of melancholy piano going on in the background. I found it kind of at the beginning I found it very subdued. But then apply At the same time, it was a weird sort of level that you’ve hit. But it’s it’s isn’t it? It’s in us, happiness is always in us and we don’t need outside influences.
G Brian Benson [25:11]
No, you’re right. And I think also, one of the points that I was kind of trying to put across is that, that, you know, you can’t necessarily can’t really read it out of a book. I mean, I was being there was a literal storyline, but it we just need to connect with others. And, and, and so, you know, when, when the colorization happened, it was every time somebody kind of did something for somebody a random act of kindness or what have you. And, and, you know, I think it was probably looking back it was almost been a little bit autobiographical, and because there’s a part of me, you know, the last six, seven years it’s, it’s been exciting creating stuff, but it’s also been very lonely at times. And it’s also been I’ve kind of set myself up maybe with certain expectations for things that I wasn’t ready for that I thought it was and that little mean to some dark places and like, you know, and then tough times just because you know, not really having a normal job for all these years as I was creating and just trusting in what was happening in the process, it I wasn’t always the happiest person. And because I would kind of I got myself a little bit isolated, and oh, and David.
David Ralph [26:21]
After my first two books came out, self help books, I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect and almost pious, because here I am reading self help, and I lost myself, I lost the fun part of me. And so now I’m just trying to get you know, I’m back now, but I’m just I’m tapping back into my authentic self. And that’s really, I think this is fascinating because I have gone through a journey doing this show where I think the middle episodes were, I will write I would good, but it lost the fun element, but I wanted to create a very beginning and I think because people were coming to me with their requests for me To help I, I’d become the person that I never liked in corporate land. That was kind of serious strokey beard, like a weird Yoda, where actually, you know, I’m very good at creating businesses. I’m very good at doing what I’m doing. But I can do it and be at the same time. And that’s my key thing. You know, I can be fun I can have. Yeah, that’s brilliant. I think I lost that. So I resonate with what you’re saying greatly where you put yourself out. You’re almost buying into the myth, you’re creating a persona that you think people are expecting from you, and that’s not who you are. Yes, yes.
G Brian Benson [27:37]
Yes, yeah. And I you know, I found myself doing that on Facebook and I needed to be like this, you know, and I held a lot of stuff in and, you know, I’m finally just coming out of it and it’s just so freakin freeing. And people want authenticity. I mean, it’s the new currency. I’m telling you vulnerability and authenticity is the new currency and in when people aren’t people We’re paying attention can sniff it a mile away. And so I’m just trying the best that I can just to be authentic and let everything else fall into place.
David Ralph [28:09]
We think about Brian is it becomes easier when you are authentic. This is this is the real weird thing. I spent years in corporate land, going to do jobs that was paying me a lot of money, but I hate it. And literally every day I was having a stomach ulcer because I didn’t really know what I was doing. And I was playing a role I was playing what they expected of me. But once you actually find the thing that is you and you’re authentic, people buy into that you can create probably more income than you did before. But you have fun, you just enjoy yourself. But you’ve got to go through that that journey of acceptance, because we’re so programmed that life has to be hard. I’ve got to go and do this hard day’s work. I’ve spoken to so many people who have said to me, I want you to create a business but gave a lifestyle that I loved. But once I got that I felt guilty and almost wanted to break up the business because who am I? Who am I to be able to do this? Who am I to wake up when I want and be earning money at the same time? It’s a really strange way that the brain operates, isn’t it?
G Brian Benson [29:18]
Absolutely. And I’m just, you know, you’re catching me at a very interesting time is I really shed a lot of my old stories and you know, letting down a lot of my shields that have been up for a long time recently, and I feel really, really, really ready now my foundation is strong and solid, you know, I like who I am and what I’m doing and, and then I’m proud of it and I’m ready to I’m not doing it to make money but I’m ready to receive it because I can do more stuff when I have it and it’s in its natural progression, it needs to come in and out. And so I don’t want to be a martyr anymore. I want to I want to I want to be successful at this but I also want to more importantly I just you know I want to have the resources available to really do Cool stuff so
David Ralph [30:00]
so you’re saying that there has been a time in your life when you actually would have pushed success away even though you wanted it and you could taste it if it came to you, you might have gone now actually, I’m not quite ready for this.
G Brian Benson [30:17]
Oh, yeah, I think so. I mean, you know, when my first couple books came out, I mean, they both won awards, but I didn’t sell that many because number one, I didn’t really know how to market them and you know, the internet was I don’t know it’s it’s different now but and I’ve always kind of it’s been tough for me to market myself a little bit because I’m a giver and I’m pretty humble I try to be humble and and I don’t like to ask for things for money etc. But I you know, I’m I think I’m learning how to just share be my authentic self and share in that regard and and hopefully people will see what I’m doing is valuable and it hopefully it makes them feel good and they want to support it but So, you know, I those first two books, I didn’t really push that much at all or I didn’t really know how to push them I maybe kind of came across as being more of a Salesman because I didn’t know any better even though I was you know, I really felt like it was valuable material and it could help people but they were also for me first and foremost Brother, you know, when I wrote them I my own personal growth. So
David Ralph [31:25]
did you need personal growth as in? Do you? Once again, I suppose it’s that searching for happiness within. I see so many people reaching out for the next book, The next personal development book, where you almost want to pick up the book and smashed their knuckles and say, the answer is not in the bloody book. The answer is getting off your cell phone and going and having a conversation with someone or meeting somebody you’ve never met before or networking. So did you need to go from personal development when it’s in you order to Time.
G Brian Benson [32:00]
Oh, absolutely. Yeah, no, I definitely did. I mean, and that was it that’s been the catalyst for everything is happening to me now. Plus, I think having a lot of experiences in life, I mean, some very positive and some very tough and hurtful and difficult. It’s just I think it’s just helped make me become a more sympathetic and empathetic person as I go forward, hopefully in a bigger way just to to connect with people on a more personal level because I can understand what they’ve been through or I can share a story in a more authentic and honest way. You know what I mean? So, yeah, I saw you, you know, in it, but yeah,
David Ralph [32:45]
I saw you do a little YouTube speech thing. And it was a it was a story in and you can share it with the listeners because it was very, very powerful about you doing an Ironman competition or triathlon, and you had this vision of picking your son up at the last bit and sort of running across the line. And as you were saying it, you start tearing up and you got very, very emotional. And when I was watching it, I felt that and so I shared it with my community again. I’ve been sharing your week, and so many of them came back home. And so many people came back to me went, Oh my god, you started my day crying, and then I watched another one of these things, and he got fine. But you were so warm and open. Did you? Did you consider not putting back when you started to sort of be a bit blobby? Did you think yourself? Oh, actually, that’s one step too far.
G Brian Benson [33:42]
That’s Wow. You know, that was probably three or four years ago and that was that was very brave of me at that point in my life. Now it wouldn’t be a big deal. I’m not afraid to show emotion, you know, in person or in public. But who I just I just felt it was it. You know, after I left a family business, I moved to Reno from Oregon, to kind of reinvent myself but more importantly, to reconnect with my son because he was living about 30 miles from there near Lake Tahoe in Northern California. And so I spent four years while he was in high school there. And it was it was a very raw time for me, you know, as we reconnected and went through some highs and lows and, and so I just felt really I really wanted to share that because it was important to me and, you know, the story you’re referring to is, you know, I did an I’ve done for Iron Men to have a more long time ago in 1989 and 1990. And I wanted to do a couple more back and so I set a goal to do one in 2005 and my son was not alive for the first two. And I just really felt like it would be awesome to be able to he was 11 at the time to have him share that experience of seeing all these people living out their dreams, you know, the, you know, finishing an Iron Man. And so his mom was wonderful and brought him there to the race site, you know, which is two three hours from where they lived and and so I knew going in those six months while I was training, I just Yeah, I would just think about him being there and just surprising him and having him run across the finish line with me. And I got emotional Wiles training, thinking about it. And so to have it happen, it was just magical. And the picture of us finishing is that was just one of the best days of my life and it so it was, I was, I was okay, even though it was hard for me to do that back then I felt like I really needed to and wanted to and, you know, it’s just a way for me to kind of hopefully let him know how much I love them. You know it hopefully that he would have watched it. You know what I’m saying? So it’s kind of a gift for him as well as for me just open up my heart a little bit.
David Ralph [36:00]
At that time, could you have said to him face to face? I love you or, you know, was that a sort of a third party route to get the message to him?
G Brian Benson [36:11]
Well, that’s a great question. And it’s yes and no, no one. Yes. I mean, I will hold on secretary. Well, I do we do say we love each other to each other. And you know, as I’ve been blessed, and I do that with my family, too, and I did that for him at that time in our lives, but yet we still, I don’t think hadn’t really. Maybe I hadn’t been forgiven for some for maybe not being around. I mean, you know, when he was growing up, and so it was it was a third way as well as even though I did do it. I said, I love him constantly. I think I it was just another way to kind of let him know and I think maybe by doing it that way, hopefully it just he it maybe was another way to reach him. If that
David Ralph [36:57]
makes total sense. I’ve got a 14 year old I’m Daniel. And every morning, I will give him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. Because I was aware that when I grew up love was kind of there, but you never had it sent to you. The I don’t remember having many folks, I don’t remember anything really, it was just, you know, they supported you and they love you. And but it wasn’t, it wasn’t that sort of physical contact. And so with my son, and my daughters, I’m very aware that if you don’t keep on doing it, because when they’re little, you know, you’re kissing, hugging him all the time, but you can lose track of that, and he just sort of disappears somehow. So I’m very focused on every morning giving him a hug every night making sure I put him to bed, even though he’s 14. I just think it’s a way of you know, keeping that connection. So you don’t need to go to the third party because you can lose it very quickly. Brian, can you?
G Brian Benson [37:51]
Yeah, yeah, that’s great. And that’s wonderful that you’re able to do with your son and my son, it will be 23 in December now and you know, I feel like we have a really pretty good relationship. ship and he’s really proud of him. He’s a really talented videographer, videographer and photographer and do a lot of neat things and I’m just trying to be as supportive as I can and he’s very independent and driven in his own way. And you know, I’ve just learned through through the years that kids are our biggest teachers number one, but I he wouldn’t really listen to me if I kind of tried to tell him something so I just tried to share what worked for me and just let it resonate and I do the same now I don’t really know he it’s it’s a tinge interesting process, but but we’re good and I’m really proud of them. And it just
Unknown Speaker [38:40]
I know you just learned a deeper level of love. I think that’s an absolute
David Ralph [38:43]
metaphor for everything, isn’t it? I think that is what you’re about. It’s what Join Up Dots is about I think it’s is a deep need for love, isn’t it? I think it’s love, acceptance and helping. I think that’s that’s really what lights you up.
G Brian Benson [39:00]
Yeah, yeah, yes, you know and, and it’s oh my gosh it’s just it’s all it’s interesting as I’m as I’ve been finding and searching for it for myself, I’m you know, self love, acceptance of myself and who I am and what I have to work with and unwinding some of those hurtful stories from the past and what have you, I just, I just feel it’s so important to let others know that they are enough just being who they are and what they have to work with. And I just want to try to pound that into people’s head will kindly pound that into people’s heads through all these different things that I’m doing. And just hopefully, it just kind of makes them feel good and maybe thinks about something in a different way or sparks them to to do what you know just to be themselves and whatever that might mean. So that’s kind of as my mo
David Ralph [39:53]
Let’s play some words. Now that created the whole format of Join Up Dots back in 2005. He He’s no longer with us. The words stay on here, Steve Jobs.
Steve Jobs [40:03]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [40:38]
Now I get a feeling from speaking to you that you’re going to buy into those words. Totally.
G Brian Benson [40:45]
Absolutely. And I’ve never really anything. I’ve heard that before, but I never really it has. It resonates totally now. Absolutely. I just I’m, I’m lucky. I’m very lucky that I’ve always had a belief then. I’ve had it I know I kind of feel I’ve always known where I’m headed Even though it doesn’t always it hasn’t been easy. And you know, I’m always looking for signs that it’s you know, happening, but I do believe that my dots are going to connect and then unexpected things are gonna happen in the form of opportunities and, and growth in just the right people and the right connections and so yes, yes. And yeah,
David Ralph [41:23]
so when you look back on your life, Brian, is there a big.is there a moment, a conversation, a situation that you think yeah, that really was when things started to go in the direction that I wanted it to go in.
G Brian Benson [41:42]
Wow. I don’t know if there was one particular moment. I’ve had some big ones. I think when I got into triathlons in an early age that was interesting, and I think it gave me a lot of confidence and it kind of made me feel at a young age that I could maybe kind of do whatever I wanted. If I put My mind to it, you know, I never planned on writing or acting or the other things back then. But but having finished one of those long races or riding my bike across the country, it was just a very empowering, fun experience. So I think those were, you know, and I’ve had probably a handful of them along my journey. The last since I left the family business, you know, some of some some things I’ve connected with an acting class had been very freeing and helped me work on becoming my most authentic self. You know, my first book, obviously, well, when I left the family business, that was a catalyst when I wrote my first book, that was a catalyst that pointed me in this direction. And so yeah, definitely.
David Ralph [42:46]
They all join us though. He funny if I asked you if I asked you that question. Yeah, another six months. I’m sure you’ll go Actually, there was that one. I do a show every single day and I’ve started joining Don’t stop. I didn’t. I had no memory of a Sunday when I had these conversations, I think, oh, my god, yes, I realised now I can just join them up little by little by little by little, but make a big whammy. And once you hit that Whammy, you realise that you’re on the right track.
G Brian Benson [43:18]
For sure, and I think it’s no coincidence that my first book was on a whole bunch of different ways to stay in life balance, because I’m very good at that. And I, I make it a point to be in balance as much as I can be. And that means hiking and you know, taking some time for myself because when I’m in balance, I can then listen to my intuition. It comes through a lot clearer and that’s my guide. You know, and and, you know, that’s, yeah, there’s no accident. I truly believe
David Ralph [43:46]
no accident. It’s all getting off your backside people. It’s all shifting that booty and see what happens more often than not, nothing happens, or at least you think it’s not happening, but things are happening and to the ground under the surface, and within a year or two years, something starts shaking, you know, I went through a vast period of it. And I always say this because I don’t want people to lose the message. That Yes, the show’s going amazingly well now, but for a long time, it was just crickets. And they were mute crickets. There was no sound coming from the tool. And I was just blasting episode after episode out into the world and there was nothing coming back to me. But I knew that for every episode, that was work that was in the can that was out there that was building a history and archive. And that’s what you do. You get up off the sofa, you start doing stuff, and some of it’s gonna work. Some of it’s not but you are building a history until that point where the world are looking in your direction and go to know you and offer you, your TEDx speaker. Do you know anything? Am I and then that’s when it really starts when you suddenly realise what you are. Do you think One
G Brian Benson [45:02]
Oh, I I totally subscribe to that. And you reminded me of an experience I had in 2009 after my first book came out and I, I just created my first workshop and I felt it was an interactive workshop. So I didn’t have to speak the whole time because that was just another tool for me to learn how to be comfortable in front of people. But I gave it a go, I tested it in front of a group of my friends and I found that it really kind of worked well. So I got on the phone and three weeks later I was on the road i’d created a 15 stop workshop and book signing tour through six different US states. And and like you had mentioned with all those times of you know, doing your shows, with not really having many listeners, well, most of the events I went to had nobody show up and it was very humbling. But yet I feel like I needed to do it. And and I don’t know why as a rite of passage, or just to develop a thicker skin or, or you know, just whatever but but you’re right, the more You do the more people start to take notice and and you just got to put time in the work in and because it’s all about building your foundation. And at least that’s what you know. I mean, I know you would agree
David Ralph [46:12]
100 agree with everything you say me. Yeah, that’s that’s why you’re on this. That’s why you’re on the show. And that’s why we’ve been leading up to this point in the show, which is the Sermon on the mic when we send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could go back in time and speak to the young Brian, what age would you choose and what advice would you give? Well, we’re gonna find out because I’m gonna play the theme, and when it fades, you’re up. This is the Sermon on the mind
Unknown Speaker [46:45]
with the best of the show,
G Brian Benson [47:04]
Brian, what I would like to share with you we’re gonna go when you went to high school, I just went through some tough times on the baseball team, and I just want you to know that you’re enough being exactly who you are. And no matter what anybody says or thinks, but that you’re an amazing guy, and, and just continue to believe in yourself and and know that you’re loved. You know and you have a bright future ahead of you and just know that that’s your good guy.
David Ralph [47:54]
Brian, what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you, sir?
G Brian Benson [48:01]
Ah, well, my website, which is G. Brian Benson.com. And I’m on Facebook, I think the page is G Brian Benson media. And I’m on Twitter and a whole bunch of other places under distance G. Brian Benson. So yeah, the website is probably the best way. I’ve got a fun website up. I’m actually gonna have a new one up in a couple weeks. But all the you know, the kind things you said about the films, they’re all on my website and the TEDx talk and all that kind of stuff. And, and so
David Ralph [48:34]
yeah, I have all the links on the show notes. Brian, thank you so much for spending time with us today. joining up those dots. And please come back again, when you have more dots to join up. Because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our pasts is the best way to build our futures. Gee, Brian Benson. Thank you so much.
G Brian Benson [48:55]
Thank you, David. You’re awesome.
David Ralph [49:00]
He goes, gee, Brian Benson. I love his work. I really do. And, you know, go over on to his YouTube channel, check out his website because these are not just let’s do a bit of Facebook Live and throw it to the world. These are like really well constructed little stories with a message behind. very insightful, very motivational. And he is certainly waking up the world. He’s woken me up, and I’m sure he will wake you up as well. Thank you so much for listening to Join Up Dots. Thank you so much for everything you do to make the show what it is. Please connect with us on Facebook or Twitter, or wherever you can see the dots. And we will respond in kind. Thank you so much. Cheers. Bye.
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you or wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.
Searching For Happiness