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Orion Talmay Joins Us On The Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Business Podcast
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Introducing Orion Talmay
Orion Talmay is my guest today, on the Steve Jobs inspired Join Up Dots free podcast interview.
She is a lady who really is blazing a path across the world.
Being uniquely her and helping people everywhere to find love and amazing relationships.
Now you might expect that the introduction will talk to you about Californian beaches, yoga retreat and other such things.
But by now, as you well know, is not what we do at Join Up Dots.
Instead we like to start with the words of the lady herself who says
“I was a rebel in my teenage years. At 18 years old, I served in the intelligence unit of the IDF. It taught me discipline and responsibility.
Soon after my service ended, my free spirit took me to Japan. Living in this magical place for 3.5 years was better than the best sushi you have ever had.
But I knew that life had more to offer, I dreamed of becoming the next Angelina Jolie and moved to NYC to study acting.
When I started getting minor roles in independent films, my dream seemed within reach.
How The Dots Joined Up For Orion
It wasn’t all easy. I’d endured a crippling bout of depression that lasted for years after escaping an abusive relationship.
I did everything I could to mend my heart and regain my strength.
The process of rising like a phoenix from my own ashes, was my catalyst for becoming a coach and helping others in the same way I was helped.
Sometimes, you have to go through great pain and difficulty to unwrap your true gifts.”
And isn’t that what we see every single day in Join Up Dots, the bad stuff is the gold, and the good stuff is well…..just that, good.
Nice to live through, but doesn’t really teach you anything.
And now with her coaching business, podcast, and testimonials growing daily it is without a doubt clear to everyone that this lady needed the tough times to become who she is today.
So when did she realise that her dreams of a youngster were not actually the dreams that the adult should cling to?
And where do people go wrong when trying to find love? Trying too hard, or not trying at all?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Orion Talmay
Show Highlights
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Orion Talmay such as:
We discuss how we all are masculine and feminine energies, and how we can channel these to gain different results from what we would normally receive.
Orion shares how she found her partner, after having a breakthrough at a Tony Robbins course..and what happened in a hot air balloon.
and lastly….
Why we would all look ourselves in the mirror and say “I love you” no matter what has gone right or wrong in our lives. Acceptance is such a major part to finding your true self.
How To Connect With Orion Talmay
Return To The Top Of Orion Talmay
If you enjoyed this episode with Pete Matthew, why not listen to some of our favourite podcast episodes such as Caleb Breakey Pamela Slim, Ross Jeffries or the amazing Meaningful Money
Or if you prefer just pop over to our podcast archive for thousands of amazing episodes to choose from.
Full Transcription Of Orion Talmay Interview
Intro [0:00]
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:25]
Yes. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning and welcome to Join Up Dots. Yes, this is this is the UK sexiest podcast coming from the United Kingdom blasting across the world and attracting women like like a magnet to me. And that’s what we’re going to be talking about today. Because today’s lady is she’s she’s a love magnet. She’s a love missile. She’s a motivational guru that can get people doing the old doing the old stuff, you know, the the stuff that the kids don’t want to know about. But it’s great to know or maybe there’s more to it as well, but who knows, she is really blazing a path across the world being uniquely her and helping people everywhere to find love, and amazing relationships. Now, you might expect that the introduction will talk about California beaches, yoga retreat and other such things. But by now as you will know, it’s not what we do at Join Up Dots. Instead, we’d like to start with the words of the lady herself Who says I was a rebel in my teenage years at 18 years old, I served in the intelligence unit of the IDF. So you didn’t expect that. It taught me discipline and responsibility. And soon after my service ended, my free spirit took me to Japan, and living in this magical place for three and a half years was better than the best sushi you’ve ever had. But I knew that life had more to offer even better than sushi, and she dreamed of becoming the next Angelina Jolie and moved to New York City to study acting and when she started getting minor roles in independent films, her dreams seemed within reach. Now as she says it wasn’t all easy and she endured a crippling bout of depression that lasted for years after escaping an abusive relationship and she did everything she could to mend her heart and regain her strength. Now the process of rising like a phoenix from her own ashes was the catalyst for becoming a coach and helping others in the same way I was helped sometimes you have to go through great pain she says and difficulty to unwrap your true gifts. And isn’t that what we see every single day and Join Up Dots the bad stuff is the golden the good stuff as well. Just that good. Nice to live through but doesn’t really teach you anything. And now with a coaching business, podcast and testimonials growing daily is without doubt clear to everyone that this lady needed the tough times to become who she is today. So when did she realise about her dreams of a youngster we’re not actually a dreams that the adults should cling to? And where do people go wrong when trying to find love trying too hard or not trying at all? Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up with the one and only Orion Talmay, how are you?
Orion Talmay [2:48]
Hello David, how are you?
David Ralph [2:50]
I am amazing. I feel all locked up. Didn’t you know? I want to know what love is. I want you to show me Show me what love is how am I got love in my life? Do I need to love myself first before I can get love? There’s so many love questions? Where should we start you take control of the episode.
Orion Talmay [3:08]
Okay, where should we start? I think my idea is that when a person have a certain amount of self love, respect and dignity, they can attract the right person into their lives. And if not, they will if they are in a low vibration, they will attract from their point of attraction which is of a low vibration, and they will attract somebody who can be mean absent, abusive, unkind.
David Ralph [3:37]
So in sort of summary and we’ve got right It must be a professional podcaster we’ve got right to the nitty gritty instantly here. So
Orion Talmay [3:45]
you’re still professional. It was so lovely. listening to your intro, I forgot that I was here.
David Ralph [3:50]
I forgot, as well. That’s the problem in my life. I just opened my mouth and I think oh Blimey, there’s somebody else here. I can’t just keep talking about myself all the time I get told I shouldn’t be doing that. So when you are in, in an environment that you love yourself, is it just that inner competence? You know, we’re not talking about going around kissing mirrors and just being sort of egotistical or necessity. Is it just the case that that confidence is attractive to people? Is that as simple as it gets?
Orion Talmay [4:20]
Yeah, you know, I just finished a three months training with my client. And which was amazing because we, we kind of went over we did, we took an inventory and we took we went over all the things you wanted to achieve and we just check boxes. It was like, check feeling more confident check feeling this feeling that and she completely transformed in three months because now that she owns herself, she owns her inner goddess. She looks at ourselves differently. She awakened that place in her that is more sexy, juicy and alive. You know, people notice her people treat her differently. her coworkers treat her differently. She started building our own community and track to attract more abundance into her life. So, I mean, in love and in life, everything that you do comes from a place of everything that you achieve in and can come from a place of desire and self confidence and and that place of owning who you are because people want who you are people want what you have to offer the unique you and when you’re hiding. It’s hard to attract the right people. the right business the right clients into your life.
David Ralph [5:41]
I think I’ve made a mistake or Orion I think I made a mistake. I think I was looking for sexy women, but I should have let the juicy women what’s the difference between sexy and juicy then?
Orion Talmay [5:50]
What do you think it is?
David Ralph [5:51]
I have no idea. That’s why I’ve been closeted. You
Orion Talmay [5:54]
didn’t know what would it be?
David Ralph [5:56]
Sexy is what my wife is. and juicy is not what my wife is. Would that be about? What?
Orion Talmay [6:02]
Oh, no, I think I think it’s both it might be I just
David Ralph [6:07]
don’t know what you’re saying.
Orion Talmay [6:10]
Well, when I think about juicy, I just liked that word. It just feels like it’s like a like a juicy fruit that you bite into. And it’s very tasty. Tonight, it’s it’s radiant. I just like using that word. And somehow when I when I say it women are like, Oh yeah, I want to feel juicy. There is no definition but I know that I want to be it it’s just feeling radiant from the inside out. It’s awakening that that part of them that maybe throughout the year maybe because they are professional women. They’re alpha type women. They kind of like try to hide it’s easy to be sexy, you know? To look sexy but when I think about juicy I think more about it’s it’s more sensual. It’s being sexy from the inside out.
David Ralph [7:05]
Because you don’t go a sexy accent I have to say are you You sound like the Bond girl that would seduce me into bed and then strangle me. I feel that that’s your kind of listen probably. Yeah. Have you ever done that when you was in the intelligence unit? Have you ever played the the seductive spy?
Orion Talmay [7:24]
Oh, actually, I did an independent film winter where I played a Mossad agent. But I can’t tell you about my military service because then I’ll have to kill you.
David Ralph [7:34]
But nobody listens to this show. Ryan is just you and me. You can tell me anything.
I just do a sexy voice and I think it’s you anyway. So so what what is actual a love magnet bone because I was over at your website. And that was the first thing I thought. I don’t actually understand what a love magnet is.
Orion Talmay [7:58]
A love magnet is just a metaphor of becoming an attractor rather than Hunter. Many women when they go in the in the dating world, they become the hunter the aggressor that the one of that is of masculine energy, they are the the ones who go after the guy call him all the time. pursue him all the time. And for a man who is more masculine and a score he will get bored and kind of tired of that because a man who is masculine in his core is more of a hunter. He likes to hunt the the woman if the woman doesn’t even let it give him this little play of allowing him to hunt her he will just get bored and move on.
David Ralph [8:50]
So what are you are you a hunter? Are you a juicy hunter? It’s so many different words and what would you describe yourself as
Orion Talmay [9:00]
I was I was more of a hunter you know, women come to a certain age and they’re like, Oh my god, the clock is ticking and I have to get the husband the relationship What am I going to do? I’m going to freeze my eggs I need to have babies. So they call they go in there is somewhat of a hunter energy in them. And it’s more of an aggressive energy that it comes across but I mean they don’t really show it but the band can sense it. When I think about myself I am I am way more allowing than then trying to control everything in my life. And I’m becoming more and more allowing every day. So the way I see it is that we both are masculine and feminine. We both have masculine and feminine energies and would I work with Alfa women and I work with Successful professional women. And I teach them that it’s not about giving up those, what I will call of the masculine energy masculine traits, which is directed, driven, moving forward, conqueror, even destroyer. You know, those are very powerful traits that we need, especially, you know, if you want to succeed in business if we want to keep ourselves driven. But for them, I teach them to integrate that that goddess part, that feminine part that maybe they got hurt in the past, and now they look at their feminine as something that is a weakness and not a source of power. And so they neglect her. And when they come into their relationship, and they don’t, without embracing that part of themselves, they become the man in the relationship. And then it’s two male energies within a relationship and there is no polarity. And the polarity is the dance and the dynamic between the masculine and feminine energies, it’s like, it’s like two magnets, and there is this this like static, excited energy between those two magnets, that is the polarity in relationship. Now, it doesn’t mean that they have to give up their masculine traits. This is very important, but they also need to strengthen that goddess part and with their partner, they want to maybe bring more of her because even if a woman dates a masculine men, if she’s too much in her masculine, eventually, in order to create polarity, he will drop into his feminine. So it depends what she wants. If you want a feminine men, fine, stay in your masculine, there are many relationships that are like that. But I talk to the majority of women that are in the majority of women are more feminine in their core. And I help them tap into that so they can handle a man who is powerful, successful dynamic, without trying to emasculate him bring him down. But even though they’re strong, and they know that they are powerful, they don’t try to compete, but they make him feel like their hero.
David Ralph [12:14]
And this is the natural way of opera because it sounds complicated it this way. And I imagine if I was in a bar, and I haven’t been in a bar trying to pull anybody for that 50 years. But if I was always thinking, is she feminine? And she masculine? Should I be masculine? Should I be feminine? It’s just difficult. Is it something that just naturally occurs? Or can you train yourself to be like this?
Orion Talmay [12:36]
Um, it’s something that is not naturally occurs when a woman is on vacation. When she’s connected to nature, when she’s feeling completely full and confidence, then she’ll be this beautiful Pixie, like open energy, you know, but usually because of the way the world is, and we have, we need to work we have businesses, we get sometimes too hard. So for a woman, it’s Yes, it takes a bit of fun training. It’s not a hard training, it’s training that allows her to release emotions. Moving her body, connecting more with nature, increasing self love and confidence. And yes, sometimes it takes more work for for a woman to do that. Because many women are so disconnected or don’t see themselves as as beautiful as as, as deserve deserving or worthy.
David Ralph [13:46]
Amazing. Isn’t that just sort of, I accept totally what you’re saying. Although I can’t imagine my wife being described as Pixie in any shape or form. Well, she
Orion Talmay [13:55]
just didn’t meet you. She can. Everybody. I believe that every woman has an inner goddess waiting to be awakened
David Ralph [14:04]
Pixie Pixies like
Orion Talmay [14:06]
me? Maybe she’s a queen. Okay.
David Ralph [14:08]
A Queen of the Pixies. What about that?
Orion Talmay [14:10]
Oh, that sounds good.
David Ralph [14:12]
Yeah, okay. I will put I was calling into Pixies.
Orion Talmay [14:15]
I was just talking about the playful, childlike energy.
David Ralph [14:18]
He hasn’t got that. However. I don’t know. I don’t know.
Orion Talmay [14:22]
I believe I believe she does. It’s about it’s a matter of tapping into that. And I believe you’ve seen it in many times in your life. It’s just about embracing that energy through creating more awareness around that energy of just deciding. I want to have more fun. I want to be more playful. I want to be more childlike. I want to feel free.
David Ralph [14:44]
I’d like another glass of Chardonnay. That’s what she would want.
Orion Talmay [14:48]
Without a glass of Chardonnay,
David Ralph [14:51]
without without wasting. It’s not gonna happen. It’s not gonna happen. Ryan, I’ve been with her for so many years, but I think I need coaching on this. I don’t know where it’s all gone wrong. So let’s take you back to the beginning of all this, you obviously hate, I
Orion Talmay [15:03]
think this is your limiting beliefs around, because we create people, you know, we live with people for four years. And then we characterise him, and then oh, this is my wife or this is my husband and this is the way they are. And I believe that your wife is showing up differently to different people with her girlfriends with her family, because we are different people with we are different with different people. So it might just be and it’s just a suggestion that it’s just the way you create her. And if you look at your wife, she’s pure energy, pure source and infinite possibilities. And she can be created as anything that she would like.
David Ralph [15:47]
Yeah, but on you create this is this fascinates me. I take your point. I totally understand that. Because Yeah, she’s a totally different person when she goes off with her friends and stuff, because she’s not playing the the mum role or that the wife role. But isn’t that just sort of like environment? Don’t we become? What’s required in the environment? Or is it possible possible to be something that migrates through all environments as a natural being?
Orion Talmay [16:12]
Yes, and when you look at other people, you greet people as you are not as they are, through your own filters. Yes, people are different in different environment, but also the way we see them affect the way that they show up for us. It’s almost like if you take the idea of quantum physics, where when you see the object is not there, unless you look at it. So that thing is not there. And unless you really see it, so it’s your filter that allows you to see it. But it doesn’t mean that it’s there is there are not there
David Ralph [16:50]
yet, but I could say to her right every single day. You look amazing, you look beautiful, you’re this and you’re that and she would just go, Oh, you’re supposed to say that you’re my husband, Oh, I wish I had your wise Oh, I wish I had five.
Orion Talmay [17:03]
Because we can, you know, we look for other people too, to make us happy. Like, I’ll be happy when you tell me that I’m beautiful. I’ll be happy when you tell me that I’m great. Bye. We need to create our own our own happiness. So it’s up to her to do the work to increase self love, increased self confidence, confidence and feel more embodied. And and, and look at her, you know, look at herself in the mirror and say, I love you. I love the work of Louise Hay. Louise Hay says that when something good happened, run to the mirror and say I love you. And when something bad happens, run to the mirror and say I love you, I love you no matter what. And I did a seven day challenge with a group of 450 women. And every day was different. It was some days more inner work. Some days were more fun. But the first day was mirror work. And I can’t even tell you how many women struggled with that. And I know because in the past after I endured an abusive relationship, I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror and say, I love you because I was I was full of shame, blame guilt, and also all the brainwash that I that I went through where like you’re not beautiful, you’re ugly, you’re fat, you’re this whatever I was told. And I believe that and just looking at myself in the mirror and saying I love you didn’t happen the first few times because the woman that in my in their reflection was crying. Like I couldn’t say it to myself without crying. And sometimes it takes just determination of I know that there is a light in me. And I know that I can, I can grasp and I can hold it and I can increase it. And I’m going to be persistent and everyday go to the mirror and say, I love you. I love you. I love you Until one day, I’ll believe it until one day I’ll be okay saying it without crying until one day I’ll say it and they’ll feel amazing. And it’s like when you say a lie over and over again. You’ll eventually maybe believe it. So why not say a good lie. And so you will believe it because your subconscious mind believe everything you tell it, even when you’re joking is so stupid. So ugly. Might sounds funny, but your subconscious mind just just understand the deal with the way you say it. So if you start being more mindful for about your language, so the things that you say to yourself and the things that you say to others about yourself that will really help reprogram the subconscious mind into believing. Oh, I’m smart. I’m genius. Beautiful. And and those things work. One of my mentors, dr. john demartini, who was told that he can ever read, write, or communicate. And then I think in 1919, he met somebody who told him just say, I am a genius, he gave him an affirmation that include the words I am a genius. And now he’s one of the most, the smartest people I know. He read over 30,000 books, he teaches seminars around the world, he was featured on the movie The Secrets, he’s, he lives on a on a boat with billionaires. And he writes, like, he’s so smart, it’s hard for me sometimes to understand some of the concepts that he teaches. And that just because somebody came and told him, just say it, I am a genius, I’m a genius. And he started believing in it. And he started to, to, and then he taught himself to read and write, and every day, he would learn a word in the dictionary. And now his vocabulary is insane. He uses those big words. But affirmations work. And and we can reprogram our mind to for self love, self confidence. And it’s not about other people telling us it’s really helpful when you are in an environment where people nurture you. But that will not determine exactly who you’re going to become. Because two people can endure the same trauma, one can become a motivational speaker, and one can end up in jail. Yeah,
David Ralph [21:37]
I agree with that. 100% everything you’re saying there, but I do think people, they can’t do this on their own, can I because I don’t know anybody who would be happy saying I love you in the mirror. Funnily enough, the only person who says that it’s myself. And I walk, I walk around the house all the time going, hands up, who thinks I’m great, and I’m the only one who’s putting my hand up, and all my kids just sort of look at me. So I think there is a sort of inner competence that has a trait attract other people, and it is kind of sexy as well. But um, what I’m gonna do, I’m gonna come back to that in a moment, because it is fascinating. Let’s listen to some motivational words as we normally do. And then we carry on with this conversation is Jim Carrey,
Unknown Speaker [22:17]
my father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And
David Ralph [22:21]
so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love. So have you found what you love now, Ryan? Because, you know, looking at the website, looking at your book, looking at everything you do, it seems that it’s obvious. This is where you should be. Is it true? What Jim saying that you found what you love?
Orion Talmay [22:58]
Yes, I do. And I also know that, like I said, there’s infinite possibilities of the things that I love. And I don’t want to put myself in one box. Like what I know, I know that my mission in the world is to light people up. And whether it is through love coaching, just coaching. Just being a good friend, that like this is who I am. This is this is why I’m here. I just don’t want to, if I found exactly what I love, I found so many things that I love. And I know that I’m going to find so many more.
David Ralph [23:33]
Now on your website is something that really so did intrigued me and I’ve listened to about four of your podcasts. And I’ll be honest
Orion Talmay [23:40]
ones Which ones?
David Ralph [23:41]
Oh, I can’t remember now. But I’d be honest, when I started listening to him after look, and I’ll tell you which ones I’ve listened to. I didn’t think I’d like them. I thought it was gonna be very sort of girly fired. But it wasn’t is it? It’s one of those kind of things you feel like you’re almost eavesdropping into things about ladies that you you should know about. is the perfect audience was like the perfect audience for this.
Orion Talmay [24:04]
I think you’re the perfect audience period. You’re so smart and engaging. I would love to have you as my audience
David Ralph [24:12]
every day. I won’t be back. I will be there. I will be back. You could do more videos as well. I will be there. But no, I’ll tell you which one I listened to. I listened to old Dame DC Cordova. That’s right, because I had her on my show. I listened to that one. And I listened to somebody else who I’ve had on the show as well. Where is she somewhere down the line? I’ll come back to it in a moment. But it is it was one of those shows that I didn’t think I’d like but I did like because it was it is it’s more than something he can put your finger on every conversation that you have. I agree with you as much as I disagree with you. Does that is that the sort of common trait that people have? Because I suppose we’re trying to break down our conditioning that has led us to the point of having this conversation.
Orion Talmay [24:56]
You know, but the bigger we get the more polarising. We get if you look at The most successful people in the world, they’ll always have their fans that are raving fans and people that completely disagree. don’t like them don’t agree with what they say. If I manage to create that in you that I did my job because I provoq provoked your thought process. And it’s not me teaching you what to do is me teaching you to think for yourself, not you, specifically the you in general, the general you. And this is what I do when my clients do, it’s like, I just provoke a different thought process that creates better thoughts that creates better actions, that creates better results.
David Ralph [25:40]
And we’ve waited the whole thing that the thing that sort of really, I can’t quite get my finger on is how you actually got to the point. Because it’s all right, saying that you’ve got to do all these things, and you can teach people but do you have to actually have gone through the process yourself? Before you can teach? Are you have you mastered the Ryan’s method personally, but you teach before you can hang out?
Orion Talmay [26:07]
I am far from a master. I don’t think even when I get to hopefully 120 years old, I will not be a master.
David Ralph [26:16]
Exactly the same you you’re in California. So you’ll be 120 student in about 24.
Orion Talmay [26:22]
You know, I was just watching. I was at the bulletproof conference from Dave Asprey. And who was it? The guy that invented the XPrize from Singularity University, and he talked about the future and how it future technologies he had a talk was called, The future is better than you think. And how with the new technologies we’re gonna live, you know, the average life expectancy is going to be 100. But we also going to look beaut beautiful and younger. So yeah, I think that maybe when I, when I reach 100, that technology will be so advanced that I will look pretty much the same
David Ralph [27:07]
as having all these gorgeous people sitting around and they can’t move rubbish.
Orion Talmay [27:10]
This word rubbish,
David Ralph [27:13]
yeah, rubbish. It’s rubbish. It’s rubbish. You know, I wouldn’t want to go into an old people’s home and see 30 year olds being being wiped by matron.
Orion Talmay [27:25]
Yeah. And what was the question I forgot?
Unknown Speaker [27:28]
I don’t know. I remember I
Orion Talmay [27:29]
don’t remember. I just
David Ralph [27:32]
I’m too busy looking at your pictures and wondering why you’re covered in mud on this one. It’s, it’s on my mind off. So let’s talk about getting
Orion Talmay [27:41]
to the tough mudder.
David Ralph [27:43]
Yeah, well, I’ll tell you what, it’s gonna be my screensaver From now on, because he knows Oh, no. Yes. Good image. Image.
Orion Talmay [27:49]
No, actually, this one was a dead sea. I think I think this one was dead sea.
David Ralph [27:53]
Well, I still like it. I don’t know if it’s dead sea or sexy, or whatever sea is, but it’s juicy. It’s a sea. It’s a sea,
Orion Talmay [28:02]
mineral, mud,
David Ralph [28:03]
mineral mud. And it’s a good image. And for everybody out there, this is traffic for your Avaya and go over to Ryan’s website Ryan’s method.com and look at the photos because
Orion Talmay [28:13]
that’s the only reason you have to go to the website to look at my photos.
David Ralph [28:16]
Yeah, there’s more to it than that. Like, so if you look at what you’ve done so far. It’s you know, it looks very sexy. Looks very good. It looks very but you’ve ignited your passion, you’ve embraced your power. What stages have you been through to get to this? Because it is something that looks very realised. But of course, in all business, it goes in stages.
Orion Talmay [28:40]
Yeah, of course.
I don’t believe Well, I hope that nobody will have to go through what I’ve been through in order to become something bigger and better. But the reality is that many times when people go through hardships, and they come stronger on the other side, they embrace the lessons and they find more of their true calling. I went through a lot of loneliness. And like I said, depression, like you said, after I have been through an abusive relationship, and at that time, I I grasp into everything that I can, everything I can learn. So I was I was alone. I was in in New York. When you’re with a predator, one of their traits is they isolate you so I was disconnected from my friends. disconnected from my family. I ended up in a hospital I didn’t even want to tell my family. But I was like that the the loneliness was the most painful part like how lonely I was. And when I went to a psychologist, she wanted to give me medication and even though I know that it’s good for some, like I said, I knew that there is a light inside, even though it was buried. I can, I can reach her I can awaken her. So I did. I started with little things like watching clips like Jim Carrey’s clips. I love Jim Carrey, watching funny YouTube videos just to make my make myself laugh, read books, and then eventually I end up going to so many seminars and travelling around the world studying from great leaders and luminaries to become where I was a part of my recovery was to study martial arts. Because the question that when my life was How can I not get hurt. And so the physical, physical part of not getting hurt was going and studying, I studied MMA I studied Aikido, I was a kick ass, and I was very much in my masculine. And so I would come to even though I would like wear dresses and look beautiful. I would, I would, I couldn’t date people for more than two, three months, because this energy of, you’re not going to hurt me. And I’m going to make sure that you’re not going to hurt me. And let me show you how strong I am. wasn’t helpful in finding love and relationship. And then I went to a Tony Robbins event date with destiny. And in one of the days, Tony spoke about masculine feminine energies. That’s how I learned about it. And it was new knowledge. Never heard of it before. But that day, it was like on an emotional rollercoaster I was at a no, I was like, angry and happy. And there’s so much going on. And then at 1am when the day was over, because Tony’s days are super long. I said buy a waterfall at the resort. And I was singing a song that I wrote when I was singing when I was 16 singing to the stars did was there were nobody there it was in the desert. So beautiful desert skies. And I had a breakdown to break through. And I started crying and laughing and laughing, crying really releasing. And eventually I was able to write my relationship vision. Who do I want. But most important, is Who do I need to become to attract that person? Do I need to become softer, more gentle, kinder, loving, how I’m going to show up in the relationship. So I had a lot of clarity. And I was in a state of surrender not surrender from a place of weakness or a victim. just surrender for to the highest higher force to guide me because I was like, I can’t I can’t do it. I can do it. Please help me. And 48 hours later, I met my husband. And within 24 hours, we said I love you to each other. Nine days later, he proposed on a hot air balloon in Vegas. And I was a captive audience in a in a little basket in the sky. And I said no. And I didn’t know I didn’t have anywhere to go. So was very awkward. 20 minutes, the sending? What did you do? What did
David Ralph [33:09]
you do then? It’s like It’s like being proposed to in a lift? And yes. So what
Orion Talmay [33:15]
did you do? Awkward. It was just me him and the guy that operated the hot air balloon. And later I learned to know that he promised him that he never had a failed proposal on a hot air balloon. So that was the first one. All of a sudden, like the guy from the hot air balloon holds the iPhone recording us. And Stephanie is on one knee with a diamond ring. Will you marry me? And I’m like, but I didn’t say no. I said no, not yet. And we did you know because when we met it was a different space. We met after six days of soul shedding of really like working on ourselves. So we met where we were really like there were no masks there were so much like less ego. And we were just like very pure and raw and open when we met. That’s why the connection happens so fast. So yeah, so not not yet it was awkward, but he was persistent. And then nine months later, he took me to the same resort. And he proposed to me by the waterfall. And I said yes. And we got married last year in Costa Rica.
David Ralph [34:28]
Congratulations. I must admit if somebody proposed to me after nine days, I would think there’s something wrong with them. Really because in nine days you don’t know the person do you?
Orion Talmay [34:40]
No, no, no, no I thought exactly the same. I go maybe it’s crazy. maybe just maybe I attracted another crazy guy can’t believe it but it doesn’t look very crazy is my husband is a super smart and a successful and I know the people he hangs out with which are like amazing people. So, so there was a part of me that that was like, boom is crazy, but another one that said, but it feels something different. I think my intuition told me that he is amazing. And easy looking at your book,
David Ralph [35:15]
is he a real man, you’ve got a book better still real men out there, which I must admit, I looked at it and felt really, really this real man, we all real men, I’ve got my backup a bit of mine, I got a bit angry. I got a bit techy by that title. But he’s, he’s a real man. Is he a real man?
Orion Talmay [35:34]
Okay, I’m sure that every man is a real man. Unless he is a character in a movie or in a character or in a cartoon. It’s real physical men. But this is just something that women say, I want to real man. That’s why I use that because on
David Ralph [35:54]
my sleeve I do. And then they spend that, you know, they say, Oh, I fell in love with you. Because you’re different from all my other boyfriends. And then they choose start choosing the clothes that they want them to be. And they kind of change you don’t know, I have I haven’t bought a pair of underpants in about 30 years. My wife buys all my clothes. And you know, so she’s changed me. So they like a real man. But then they want the man they want.
Unknown Speaker [36:19]
Yeah. Do you think your wife changed you? Oh, yeah,
David Ralph [36:22]
absolutely. Yeah, she cheated me by at my bank.
Orion Talmay [36:26]
Thank you. You think you changed your wife? Oh, absolutely.
David Ralph [36:31]
by filling up her bank account. It’s so funny. It’s a seesaw effect that we’ve got going on. But um, yeah, she’s, she’s, um, she’s not here at the moment. She’s going away for the weekend. She’s having a girly weekend away. And so I thought to myself, this is brilliant. I can I can live life like a teenager, I can run wild. And I don’t know what to do with myself. I basically, I’m like a domesticated hamster that has been freed from the cage. But I’m actually scared to run away. I’m scared. I’m just clinging to the side of the cage. in case something happens to me. That’s how she’s changed me.
Unknown Speaker [37:08]
Really?
David Ralph [37:09]
Yeah, I was I was like a wild man. Before I met her. I was I was crazy. I was wild. Imagine Indiana Jones, that kind of real tough kind of man. And now I’ve ended up as a kind of, as I say, a large hamster.
Orion Talmay [37:24]
Yeah, well, I guess you did change you. I don’t see you as a large hamster. I see you as a very powerful successful men.
David Ralph [37:35]
Yeah, but you haven’t seen me underpants first thing in the morning? You wouldn’t?
Orion Talmay [37:38]
Yeah. Thank you for putting that image in my mind.
David Ralph [37:42]
You’re fine. It’s fine. Oh, my email you an image. And when you can have it
Orion Talmay [37:46]
you keep you keep putting all kinds of images in my mind that are pretty entertaining. Even when it when we started before we started recording the show. That’s how you started to be it’s going to be just an easy conversation. Just imagine yourself, but you can you can share that.
David Ralph [38:06]
This is a key point. Because I think that when and without the listeners knowing there’s a certain little kind of scene setting that I do before I press record so that I know what a guest is expecting. And the guest knows what I’m expecting. And I think that’s how sort of connections are built? Isn’t it that common ground that mutual area that two people feel safe in?
Orion Talmay [38:25]
Yes, yeah. Especially especially using humour with somebody you don’t know. It’s really very helpful. So I was very excited about coming on the show anyways. But as soon as we started talk, I was like, Oh, this is gonna be a great conversation. This is fun.
David Ralph [38:43]
It’s the best conversation that I’ve ever had. Because I just don’t know where to turn on it. There’s so many different things. And I feel that most of them I would end up annoying you with, I feel that this
Orion Talmay [38:54]
is annoying me I love that. I always say that you don’t you do not know me. And and to answer your question. You know, just like that, when we come into relationship, we change to each other, we become we become a little bit different. And sometimes in order to balance relationship, we might have to neglect a part of our wild side, you know, or just express it in a different way within the relationship. Because we can just you can just go and like party and be wild. If you step into a role of of a father and a husband. It’s just a part of our natural evolution.
David Ralph [39:30]
I know what, Ryan I still want the wild times but I’m scared to have the wild times
Orion Talmay [39:36]
that this is a conversation that you have to have with your wife and then maybe she she’s missing her wild side too. And maybe you can find just a different new expression for both of you that will be very fulfilling and satisfying.
David Ralph [39:49]
She’s never here. She’s never here. She’s having a wild times. I can’t have the conversation. It doesn’t it doesn’t work in it. Now she’s here all the time. To be honest. I need her it makes it sound like she’s never here, but You know, when you find somebody and I’m going to be totally open here, you know, when you find somebody and me and my wife is so opposite, where if she likes a programme, I hate a programme if she likes this, I hate that. There’s nothing that we like other than each other. And our kids, really that’s the that’s the two things that pull us together. And we know that we’re stronger because of the sort of the opposite.
Orion Talmay [40:24]
Yes, exactly. That goes back to that magnet energy, that polarity energy, it can be expressed with, like, you know, opposite attracts Why? Because there’s polarity, there’s interest, you teaching her things, he teaches you things, you have this, you sometimes agree to disagree, and there is interest and there is excitement within the relationship rather than just like, we both like the same thing. We both do the same thing every day, same day, it’s like, you need this excitement. You need variety.
David Ralph [40:53]
I do I do, I’m gonna I’m gonna be I’m gonna have so much variety, but I’m gonna get fed up with it. That’s what I’m going to do from now on. And if she complains that I’ve changed since she’s been away, I’m going to blame you. I’m going to say go over to Alliance method an hour with Ryan, I am totally different person. Did you see people change dramatically? When you do coaching? Do people come to you? And it actually takes your breath away? how quickly people sort of change in front of you?
Orion Talmay [41:19]
Yes, yes, yes, it surprises me. Um, you know, when I coach people, I, I only take 100% responsibility for myself, but I see it as a co creation between me, the client and source creation. So I think 100% for being there present and, you know, bringing whatever I can 100% responsibility, but it’s also the clients responsibility to be there 100% present and do what I tell them to do. Because when people to do what I tell them to do, they get breakthroughs, period, when they don’t, it’s a slower process. But mostly what I so I, I’ve been around I studied with great people. And I just know, my knowledge in compared to the knowledge of the universe is zero point million 0.1. You know, it’s if there’s any number like that, that there is the things that I know that things that I don’t that I don’t know, and the things that I don’t know, I don’t know. So what happens with my client, I just become, I see myself as a vessel for divine light to channel and I almost get downloads and ideas. And if I struggle, or I’m like, Oh, my God, I get in my head, I just go back to my body and the answer come and the people transform. One of my recent clients, she came for love. And after three sessions, she stopped smoking. She was a heavy smoker for 15 years. And I did a little process with her. And she stopped smoking after 15 years. He didn’t come from me for that, but it happened or another woman on my goddess group. I did, I launched a challenge last Valentine’s. And last week, she invited me to her wedding and she said, I’ve been waiting. She’s She’s a little bit over 50 but she said something like, I’ve been waiting for this love for 50 years, I didn’t know that this type of love can exist.
David Ralph [43:21]
Did you did you well up because I felt a bit emotional when you just said that.
Orion Talmay [43:25]
Oh my god, I was I was great. Well, you know what, I couldn’t scream in that moment. I’m a screamer. I would I would just go and be like, celebrate. I also believe in the power of celebrating because if we don’t celebrate our achievement, why the hell are we doing what we’re doing? So I was Yeah, I was so happy. so so happy. And I’m like, Oh my God, thank you. I guess this is my calling. Because people change people transform. It creates ripple effect in their lives and their kids life and this is why I’m here for this is what I’m here to do. And like thank you God for for being you know, thank you God for for taking me through everything that you took me through so I can be who I’m meant to be right now. And and I also know that I’m infinite possibility and I can always be more and I can always explore more things.
David Ralph [44:19]
What I love about you now and is come across all the way through the episode is the fact that you aren’t trying to do everything. You’re just trying to do the right thing. you’re solving a problem by getting people to solve their own problems in life is kind of almost become easy for you in a way because you’re not forcing things onto people. You’re just doing what’s good for you.
Unknown Speaker [44:43]
Yeah,
Orion Talmay [44:45]
I don’t wanna for I can’t, you know, you can’t force transformation if you because I know neuro linguistic programming, I know the language of influence. You can influence somebody and it can be momentarily but if it doesn’t come from them, if it doesn’t come from, I mean, yes, it helps me to push them in the right direction. But I know that the real transformation and even though I want to tell them exactly what to do, because I can see it, sometimes it will take them a month or two to see it from for themselves. But when they see it for themselves, this is where the real breakthrough happened. And then they will never do that mistake again.
David Ralph [45:23]
I’m gonna be honest with you, I and I’m not blowing smoke up, you’re here. But this is just how I feel that there’s not many of you kind of love coaches that I would actually migrate towards. But as I’m going up and down your website, I’m thinking yeah, this is kind of common sense. This is looking after yourself making sure that you feel good. A lot of it’s a bit woowoo that other people do. And I don’t like that your seems to be practical advice, which is common sense. But, but powerful. Did you see a lot of them where it’s all about sitting cross legged on a lily pad for six hours a day, and being you know, and humming is a bit woowoo
Orion Talmay [46:04]
you know, the movie, The Secret when it came out? It made people angry, because it was that, you know, work with universal laws, well did. He didn’t didn’t use universal laws, they just use the law of attraction, meaning it just felt like, you know, just imagine that things will happen, and they will happen. But there is also the law of action, you have to take action, like Dr. Wayne Dyer say, said, We are spiritual being having a human experience and having this human experience, we have to take action in order to achieve what we need to achieve. Even when I spoke with Dr. De Martini, he told me, you know, they interviewed me for eight hours. And then from the clip that they had, in the secret, it just sounds like this is what I’m talking about. But it’s not it’s just the way they edited the movie. So it will be easier to sell. Because people look for the easy fix. People just look for the for that magical pill that will change their life forever. The blue pill or the red pill, just take a pill and everything’s gonna be fine. I take some work, it takes determination, it takes persistence. Persistence is key. It takes faith. And those things don’t always come naturally, when you’re not in a higher state. Oh, I’m
David Ralph [47:32]
in a high state. Here I am. I’m literally I’m literally floating three feet off the ground. I am hovering and hamster. That’s, that’s the best thing I could possibly be so funny. My wife’s gonna come back and she suggests she’s conservative. And then as I say, and she’s gonna blame you blame you blame you? Well, okay, this is the end of the show. And this is the part that we’ve been building up to. And it’s been a very different show, I have the kind of idea of what I was going to talk about, but you You got me off track being the professional podcaster that you are. And so visit the party, we call it a sermon on the mic, when we’re going to send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could go back in time and speak to the younger Ryan, what age would you choose? And what advice would you give? Well, we’re gonna find out because I’m going to play the theme. And when it fades you up. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Unknown Speaker [48:29]
With the best bit of the show.
Orion Talmay [48:42]
Dear Orion, I just want to tell you that I love you. And you’re always guided, protected and loved. I can’t really tell you what the future holds. Because you need to go through everything that you went through that I went through in order to become who you are. You’re going to endure hard times and you’re going to experience bliss and joy and you need to experience all of that. So you can that’s your your destiny so you can be the person that you are meant to be.
And I love you
David Ralph [49:28]
Why and what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you?
Orion Talmay [49:33]
Awesome, you can go to Ryan’s method comm and connect me with me there. You can also listen to my podcast, stellar life podcast.com that’s stellar life podcast.com I’m on Twitter at Orion tell my o r i o n ta LMAY and same in Instagram and you can find me On Facebook facebook.com forward slash or Ryan’s method,
David Ralph [50:06]
we only ask for one, we only ask for one, but they will all be on the show notes. And to me,
yes can net anyway. Just Just hold up. Right. Okay, so thank you so much for spending time with us today joining up those dots. And please come back again when you got more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the best way to build our futures. I Ryan, thank you so much.
Orion Talmay [50:30]
Thank you so much, David.
David Ralph [50:34]
Well, that wasn’t the show I was expecting I kind of had an idea of how the flow was gonna go in my head. And I got taken off track on that one. But interesting, the the sort of positive energies, the the feminine energies, the male energies, I don’t know where I stand on that. Because I’ve been in a relationship for so many years, you kind of forget that this stuff occurs, you just kind of live live. But I’m certainly going to be more focused on that. And afterwards, and Ryan gave me a little bit of coaching about how I can make my wife feel more appreciated, appreciated. And so I’m going to try that. And I’m going to let you know, I’m going to let you know if the old zing has come back in to the design of my life. But until that time, we will see you again CNA
Outro [51:16]
demon doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you or wants to become. So he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.