Welcome To the Join Up Dots Podcast Looking at How To Sleep Better
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How To Sleep Better With Christine Hansen
If you google “How To Sleep Better” you will see so many search results it is astonishing.
People are literally tapping away for solutions to their sleeping problems every second of the day.
Now you won’t need to struggle or google anymore as today’s guest is an expert at teaching you how to sleep better.
She first joined me on the show back in 2016 where we discussed her personal journey to building literally her “dream” business.
Starting her journey as an English teacher in Luxembourg, she had a pretty standard career for a few years until she got to the point when her interest in corporate coaching and sleep patterns became too much to ignore.
And she took the leap of faith, leaving her career in education in 2015 to start something new and inspiring.
How The Dots Joined Up For Christine
As she says “I understand that sleeping, while on sleep medication isn’t really sleeping.
I understand that falling asleep, but then having to lie awake for hours in the middle of the night isn’t really sleeping, and I understand that waking up just as tired as when you went to bed isn’t really sleeping either”
Which I think is where most of us find ourselves on a daily basis.
Our busy lifestyles needing more and more energy and focus.
Our workloads taking us long into the night just to keep up.
So how do we know how to sleep better for ourselves?
Instead of trying every solution that seems to work for everyone else across the world.
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start sleeping like a baby with Christine Hansen.
How To Sleep Better Highlights
During the show we discussed such dreamy subjects with Christine Hansen such as:
How to sleep better during the summer when it’s really hot at night. That is a big problem.
Why Christine think that the sleep trackers are such a bad and pointless idea.
Christine reveals how she is getting her team together so that she can pivot moving forward.
Why social norms around sleeping patterns should be ignored. Do what you have to do to get a good nights sleep.
How To Connect With Christine Hansen
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Audio Transcription Of How To Sleep Better With Christine Hansen
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:24]
Yes, Hello, good morning to you good morning to every single person across the world. I am still at the back of the garden in my proper recording studio, even though my guest today keeps on saying it’s a shade. She winds me up. She winds me up by telling me it’s a shame. But it’s not just where you keep lawn mowers and stuff. This is professional. Anyhow, what have we got to talk about today? Well, this lady was a delight. The last time she was on the show, probably about three years might be four years ago now. And today, we’re going to really tailor in and focus in on her specialism. Now if you google him how to sleep better, you will see so many search results. It is astonishing, people are literally tapping away for solutions to their sleeping problems every second of the day. Now, you won’t need to struggle or Google anymore as today’s guest is an expert at teaching you how to sleep better. She first joined me on the show back in 2016, where we discussed her personal journey to building literally her dream business CY did that. Now starting her journey as an English teacher in Luxembourg. She had a pretty standard career for a few years until she got to the point when her interest in corporate coaching and sleep patterns became too much to ignore. And she took a leap of faith leaving her career in education in 2015 to start something new and inspiring. As she says, I understand that sleeping while on sleep medication isn’t really sleeping. I understand that falling asleep but then having to lie awake for hours in the middle of the night isn’t really sleeping. I understand waking up just as tired as when you went to bed isn’t really sleeping. I I say she’s a sleep expert. Now, which I think is where most of us find ourselves on a daily basis, our busy lifestyles needing more more energy and focus our workloads taking us long into the night just to keep up. So how do we know how to sleep better for ourselves? Instead of trying every solution? That seems to work for everyone else across the world? You need our guest today? Well, let’s find out as we bring on to the show to start sleeping like a baby with the one and only Christine Hansen. Good morning, Christine. How are you?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [2:30]
Hi. It’s so cool to be back. I’m really looking forward to this
David Ralph [2:34]
is lovely. I’m just reaching out to my cold flannel. I’ve got cold flannel in front of me. And I have made you turn your air conditioning off. I haven’t here. So yeah. If you want to start stripping as we as we speak, that is totally up to you.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [2:49]
If I’m ruffles in the background, you know, there’s like one piece there’s another.
David Ralph [2:53]
Yeah, I always start on just two pieces. And then it’s easy. I’m down down to nothing really, really quickly. Now, what I want to talk about Christine, especially in today’s sort of environment where I am because it’s so hot, so hot. And so sleep at night is a bit of a nightmare. Your sleep expert, can we give some tips straight away for people in the summer that are struggling? They’re tossing and turning. And it’s just not like it is in the winter when it’s all cosy and you wrap yourself up?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [3:22]
Mm hmm. Yeah. So I think that’s like what everyone is sleeping with is keeping that struggling with, you know, whether you are generally a good sleeper or not a heat is root also the most. And it does sound so obvious, but really investing in an air conditioner is totally weapon. So I’ve been reluctant to do that for a long time. But I have one of these roller ones that you can move into different rooms. And it’s been totally worth it because I sleep like a boss all the time. Unless it’s really hot.
David Ralph [3:50]
Now I’m gonna jump in now I’m just gonna jump in there. Because I’ve always said to my family, you’ve got to learn to a climate eyes, your body, you don’t want to just have air conditioning? Is that just me being too? Oh, it’s a scientific proof there.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [4:03]
No, I mean, your body is your body, we are not in the Sahara, we’re not animals that are born to you know, be with the conditions that they are born in. You know, if you have different if you look at different species living in different places, they adapt, they are born and have adapted already. We’re not you know, so. And I think it’s also a very personal kind of preference. So I think everyone is different there. But if you’re someone who tolerates the heat really badly, I totally go for the easy solution, which is just throw some money at the problem and get a car, literally like don’t make it complicated. If that is however something that’s you know what budget is to tide, that I’m a big fan of having some towels in the freezer, and having those around your head and also maybe your feed that can really, really help. Even just a fan is something that can already be helpful. And if you can go with it blocks at the same time, if the noise is disturbing to you, for example. And something that I really love doing, it’s just getting my feet really, really cold. So I’m taking you know, a cold shower, especially for my feet, that helps to bring the temperature down a little bit too. And then in terms of bedding, I would really recommend not to necessarily go with a jersey for too cheap. But for example, linen is really breathable. And cotton that is not too tightly woven can also be really helpful. So stay away from anything that’s synthetic, it’s going to make you sweat. So those are little tidbits that can help.
David Ralph [5:24]
I’m going to give another tidbit, right? This is a tidbit that I’ve only discovered the last couple of days. This is this is a game changer. And to be honest, Christine, this is your business out the window now, but if this is going to kill it instantly, but my wife has started putting a hot water bottle in the freezer. And so we take it out. And I basically leave here touching it to my chest because I assumed that by having it to my chest. That’s my core temperature. And the last couple of nights even though it’s been stinking hot, I’ve slept reasonably well. Ice Ice hot water was brilliant night,
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [6:01]
huh? absolutely anything you can put it in the freezer like
anything that that can be very, very helpful.
David Ralph [6:08]
Now, with the noise thing as well. Okay, you might be surprised to know, but occasionally my wife says I snore at night. I don’t I don’t believe this at all. Because I don’t know how she can hear me over yourself. But anyway, with the noise factor. I know a lot of parents go, No, I can’t have earplugs in in case the kids cry or something and I won’t be able to hear them. Is that something that you’ve got a tip on as well for people out there wanting to be alert? Because I’ve got that kind of parental responsibility.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [6:38]
Yeah, there’s a lot, a lot of people who stress out about it, that’s because they’re convinced that they won’t be able to hear anything. And here’s a thing. When we are sleeping, we’re not unconscious, right? So our brain, it works really, really our brain is still alert, especially for certain frequencies and for certain noises. So they’ve done studies where they’ve looked at people and how they see and they don’t react when for example, a plane is just about the house or when a traumatised by. But as soon as that baby is just whimpering a little bit down high alert and right because we we are still our brain is very, very active. So it will detect as soon as there’s some real danger, it will detect it and it will help to dampen down the noise, but they will won’t make you death. You know. And the other thing is they will most likely fall out anyway at nighttime. But it is really a great tool to fall asleep.
David Ralph [7:31]
Right. Okay, brilliant. So So we’ve kind of covered this sleeping when it’s really hot and sweaty. Because I’ve been looking at these these gel pillows as well, but stay cold. But I don’t work, right. They work for about the first two hours when you go to sleep. And then they just get hot and sticky like everything else. Now, what about what about the people and I might be putting myself in this category as well. Where I’m happily sitting downstairs, my wife put some something that she wants to watch and instantly unboxing asleep. And then I rally myself go up to bed and then I’m wide awake. I can’t get back to sleep once I’ve done that should only just, you know just jump up as soon as I feel sleepy because I don’t know. But I’m feeling sleepy. I just sort of go off downstairs.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [8:13]
Ideally, yes, that’s the short answer. So if you go and sit in the front, in front of the TV and you immediately fall asleep, it’s actually a sign that you are sleep deprived, because the action of a TV on the brain is actually stimulating. But at the same time, it also helps to relax in terms of the mind carousel, but from the impressions from the visuals from the noise. It’s a stimulating rain, kind of you know stimulation thing. So when I have people who fall asleep constantly in front of the TV, it’s a sign for me that they are actually sleep deprived. But what happens is that you get the sleep cycle and, and the brain is usually taking frantically taking what it needs, especially in the first sleep cycle. And it just means that you’re not quite as tired anymore. And when you then go to bed, especially if you have a lot of new mind, it’s dark, it’s quiet, then everything turns out probably have a little bit more energy, because you already got a little bit of one sleep cycle in usually, or at least half of one, then it can be much more difficult to
David Ralph [9:15]
but I’m kind of falling asleep at seven o’clock. So I can’t go to bed at seven o’clock, my kids are still walking around, you know, we’ve got ice cream veins going outside. It’s still like summer, I can’t say to the wife, I’m going to bed at seven o’clock.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [9:27]
Well, probably if you let yourself if you didn’t have social obligations, or if you didn’t want to be social, you’d probably go to sleep by seven. And you probably get up really, really early. So that’s when we talk about circadian rhythms and biological clocks, and they are all very different. So some people are, you know, really, really tired early. And they would if we just let them if they didn’t have to go to the job, they would get up at 4am and 5am. And start the day there. Others have a delayed circadian rhythm where they actually get only started get tired around 12 one we’re going to AN and they would happily sleep until 1011 or even noon if we’d let them. That would be their rhythm. And that’s when they would be in flow and when they would be the happiest but unfortunately, we have Jobs we have family we have a life. So it’s not always it’s not always possible to to cater for that.
David Ralph [10:21]
So suddenly you the best sleeper ever. Did you have no issues? Do you go to bed, because my mom was talking about my wife all the time because she moans about these things. But she’s got one of these little Fitbit on a on a wrist. And she keeps a measure here. And she keeps on saying, Oh, look at my deep sleep. I’ve had nine minutes of deep sleep. And I was saying if you didn’t have that on, you wouldn’t know. And then she said, Well, I’m going to give it to my daughter and my daughter had it. And she had four and a half hours of deep sleep. So she’s now
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [10:48]
distressed. No, I hate low sleep trackers, I really do. me then create a lot more anxiety and stress than anything else. I really, really don’t like them. And common sense actually tells you that if you go and fall asleep peacefully, and if you sleep and you wake up and you have energy and you don’t get tired anymore, but are ready to start the day. That is a definition of good sleep, not a tracker. It’s actually they’ve coined the term at the end of 2018. And it’s called author sommelier. And it’s derived from the term orthorexia, which is when you are obsessed with eating perfectly. And very often people with eating disorder have that because all of a sudden your means that you become so anxious about the perfect sleep, that it’s actually causing insomnia. And I can totally, absolutely testify to that, because I have people who call me all the time claiming that they have really bad sleep. And the only question I ask them, are you actually tired? It’s like, no, I actually sleep really well. But my Fitbit told me I didn’t, it’s bullshit. It’s so hard. First of all, it’s sleep is very, very complex. Every sleep phase has different chemical processes, you have different neurons fire, you have different hormones are creating in different speeds and different amounts. So it’s really hard to actually measure that unless you are in a professional sleep lab. So a Fitbit, there’s no fucking way, excuse me, it’s going to be able to measure that it’s just not happening. So on top of that, we have different sleepers. Some people, they lie down, they don’t move all night long, and they wake up and they get to go by others move along, I turned around the transits, it’s really different. Some also breathing differently. So there’s so many different factors. And sleep tracker is really hard for them to be accurate. So I find First of all, you have an accuracy. And secondly, it’s just triggering this anxiety in people by giving false reports most of the time and also creating this perfectionism, fostering this perfectionism that can be very detrimental to sleep. So it’s really been a problem, in my opinion, rather than help.
David Ralph [12:55]
Oh, this is brilliant stuff. I tell you what, because number one, you’ve already proved I’m sleep deprived. So when I fall asleep on the sofa, I can say that I’m sleep deprived, I you know, you don’t do anything about it. And also that she’s a mad woman for having this thing on her wrist all the time. So so you’re sorting out my marital stresses? But is it a thing? Now? Do you think that is becoming more prevalent a problem in your business I can only assume is getting busier and busier because people’s lives are getting busier and busier. Because when I was when I was in the 70s. And the 80s. Growing up, literally, you as a child, you would have 15 minutes TV or something there was like no TV at all. And so you’d go to bed, you didn’t have a TV in your room, you didn’t have a tablet, you didn’t have anything, you just lay there and sort of go to bed. But now my kids always saying how can I just have 10 more minutes on my phone? Can I just have 15 minutes on this? So this sleep problem, you’re going to get busier and busier. Christina is you’re going to have to duplicate yourself on you.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [13:55]
Wow, that’s why I’m hiring a team right now.
David Ralph [14:00]
Let’s talk about that and just want I’ve tapped into that, because when I last spoke to you, you were very much getting it going yourself. And now you’re to the point where your business is flourishing enough to actually have a team of sleep experts to help you How did they help you because I would think most people want to speak to you because you’re the face of good sleep.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [14:19]
Yeah, so here’s the thing. I mean, I’ve always known that I wanted to have a company that’s a little bit more on the high end side. And so me personally, I do have high end packages, which is also a high end price tag. So packages range between 7000 to 10,000. US dollars, which means that not everyone can afford that, which is fine with me. But I also wanted to have people able to help them and work with them. So I’m running a retreat in October in Bali, where I have six people that I will train doing what I do. And they will also curate group programmes and be a little bit more more affordable in the beginning. And then that way, I can basically refer out people who want to work with me, but to work with my team, and I supervise them so they get the same kind of service but with different people. That’s basically what I own to do. And that way I can also pursue other alleys where I don’t necessarily work with one on one clients as much. And that is really how I want to construct my business.
David Ralph [15:16]
which is which is brilliant. Because you know, like older that the famous chefs in the stuff, you go to their restaurants, you never see them. Do you just see somebody that’s like trying to
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [15:26]
our in the top? Yeah, they take the gold leave and do beautiful little touches. Yeah.
David Ralph [15:33]
So So have you found that you have been to in your business? I know we have to because I’m very aware of that myself. I am the brand. I’m the person, I’m the voice. And so literally everyone wants to speak to me. And I totally understand that. And there’s a big part of me that thinks they deserve that. But there’s another part of me that thinks that’s going to kill me, you know, I need to balance it. Have you felt the same thing?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [15:59]
I think kind of Yes. And no. I think because I saw so many of my peers starting to burn out and be overwhelmed. I’ve got to help pretty early on. And I was really lucky that last year, I found my perfect assistant, who speaks three languages because I’m living in Luxembourg. So we speak lots of other German, French and English, found someone and she’s recently super smart. And I have to say she has helped me so much. And the other thing is though, my business model is super, super simple. I basically only have one offering, which can come into different lips. But that’s it. So I don’t need to worry about a launch, of course, or you know, doing a mastermind programme or group programme, I literally only have two offers and as a ticket or leave it kind of policy. So for me, it was really about keeping it as simple simple as possible. I also always knew that I didn’t want to have a big team in terms of having to pay salaries and so forth. So even the mentees that I have now they will have their own businesses that will be part of the talk about that they run their own businesses. So that I think was key for me not to become too overwhelmed. And now it’s basically a filter system. So my assistant goes through request first and she answers and then depending on who it is or what it’s about. I jump in personally but she’s she’s brilliant. And I’ll tell you
Oprah Winfrey [17:19]
because amazing. I can’t
David Ralph [17:20]
get through to you like I could. Yeah, I’ve got a secret route but I can but I don’t use it all the time. But she she does. She holds that firm, doesn’t she?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [17:32]
She does I love her so much for that. She is she’s my she’s my right brain half you know,
David Ralph [17:39]
I thought you’re gonna say guard dog but that wouldn’t be as complimentary with it.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [17:43]
Not really right maybe a god princess no Dragon Warrior kind of a warrior kind of picture imagine that like Xena the warrior princess
David Ralph [17:53]
God. Sure. Well, well, what about they’re quite cute.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [17:56]
And this Carrey as well.
David Ralph [18:00]
Very scary when they poke their little ratty heads down handbag. Why would you want that and and it’s bad enough when people walking along with a bag of poo. I think this is a bag of poo. But But dogs gonna be in there just doing what it needs to do. And you got no idea when you reach him via credit card because you’re a high to do lady. It’s it’s crapping it It literally is
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [18:22]
literally Yeah, I know. It can’t relate to that either. But yeah, don’t don’t visualise my tomorrow as much.
David Ralph [18:31]
She she’s she’s brilliant lady doing a good job. Now, let’s just play a few words. And I’m going to come back to you to find out more about the best ways to sleep.
Oprah Winfrey [18:41]
The way through the challenge is to get still and ask yourself what is the next right move? not think about Oh, I got all of this stuff. But what is the next right move? And then from that space, make the next right move and the next right move and not to be over welcomed by it. Because you know, your life is bigger than that one moment. You know, you’re not defined by what somebody says is a failure for you. Because failure is just there to point you in a different direction.
David Ralph [19:12]
Now I played those words deliberately because at the beginning she says you know the key to it is just get still. And that’s that’s the right thing for you know, sleep, isn’t it the people that are going on? Oh, need sleep, a new sleep, I can’t sleep you’re not going to sleep. And if the challenge you just get into bed and you just lay there and you just breathe in and out. Because I’ve never been able to do that shape business. You know, I just I just end up with 600 sheep that annoy me. So how’s the best way to just get still? Is it just leave air? Or do Should I put my feet in a different direction? What What should I do?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [19:48]
Well, it’s howling at the moon. Okay, so
Exactly. So now what it is is a lot of people ask me that. And because the minority Marisol is super, super prominent, especially when we have a lot to deal with during the day. And that’s where the crux of the matter actually lies. Sleep is not just a process that happens at night. It’s actually you dragging your whole day with you towards sleep. So if you want a good sleep, what happens is that you have to imagine that during the day, we compartmentalise especially things that trigger us whether it is upsetting us, whether it is something we don’t understand, we can’t figure out problem solving, annoying, angry, you know all of these emotions, we tend to just take them and compartmentalise them. And then when we are good sleeper, or someone who eats sleeps easily without issues, our dreams take care of that, you know, in our dreams, that’s basically the playing field, it’s the safe space, where your brain is basically triggering all of these things randomly, which is why our dreams very often don’t make sense. They are absolutely essential for problem solving. And also the feeling emotionally and psychologically with what we’ve been stocking up during the day. Now, some people don’t have more difficulties to fall asleep, and to just let everything happen and have their REM sleep taking care of this. So then it kind of is like jumping the gate when they start to lie down and it’s quiet it already the process is already starting. And very often it’s just before they fall asleep because that censorship guard is dropped just a fraction of a minute or a second too early, and everything starts to storm out. So if that is the case, the thing that can really help us to actually deal with you crap during the day, as well. So I’m a big, big fan of either. First of all, the first thing you need to start doing is to become aware of what triggers are actually important to you. So if a situation happens instead of immediately compartmentalise it and I get why you do it, we don’t have time, it’s just acknowledging, oh, this is nice, or this is actually upsetting me that is already a grateful step, mother step, if you are highly sensitive, which will love my clients actually are the very hyper sensitive and very emotional and just very empathetic, is writing and the process of writing is different than thinking about it. It’s just because your brain needs to take a different route to process things. And because you have to use your Kinesiology and your your fingers and your emotions and everything to your muscles to write it physically down, it takes a different track, I can really help and it doesn’t mean that you need to write a dear diary entry of 20 pages that can literally mean that you just write down the word parking spot, if someone took that last parking space. Or
David Ralph [22:40]
I’m jumping in there, I was hanging on every word. But as your clients VAT stressed that somebody who needs a parking space will stop them sleeping.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [22:50]
It’s one of the things Yes, because what sometimes happens is that they’re very aware of how they act. So they can become super upset, too bad. And sometimes they become enraged about that. And then they feel really, really bad. That first of all, they let it get to them, or Secondly, the kinds of thoughts that came up. And so they start to challenge themselves. And then there’s a whole can of worms that starts to open up. So it’s really, if it’s even just a teeny tiny thing, like someone taking the last burger, a muffin in front of ahead of you, and it just upset you and annoyed you, instead of judging yourself, it’s really helpful to get it out of your head. And that very often, it’s trivial things, it’s not necessarily the big, big, big emotional things it can be, in which case, it’s also great to write that right out. And just to acknowledge it doesn’t really matter. So don’t judge yourself on what you think is important or isn’t because your brain doesn’t care what you think is important. It has its own kind of system. So really, my word of advice would be be aware during the day of what might be haunting you at night and just nip it in the bud.
David Ralph [23:57]
I’ll tell you what, by Christine being absolutely be honest with you, if I was losing sleep over parking spaces and blueberry muffins, I wouldn’t be connecting with you I’d be connecting to a mental person, I’d think I’ve got a major problem.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [24:13]
I think it’s really more common than you think. So again, it’s not about judging people who are upset about the things
David Ralph [24:22]
I charge I charge you can sense it
Unknown Speaker [24:24]
David Ralph [24:25]
I’m judging already,
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [24:27]
which is why I do my job and you do with That’s right,
David Ralph [24:30]
you keep it to yourself. But he said without without sort of sharing too much. Is that sometimes that you think to yourself? Actually, this isn’t? This isn’t my remit this this, you know, although it’s affecting your sleep, it’s not actually what I’m here to do.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [24:49]
What do you mean, my job know what what do you mean?
David Ralph [24:52]
A client comes to you and says I can’t sleep. And then you don’t delve into it. And then you find out that actually there’s a there’s a real good reason why can’t sleep and it’s not me the sleep issue, it’s more, I need to calm you off to somebody else.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [25:06]
Sometimes, I mean, what’s really important to understand is that the way that I work is not just emotionally, it’s a big, big part of it is coaching, coaching and so forth. But the other half that I do is very physical, right, so I run a panel of lab tests, and very often I find that there is something there that is keeping them from sleeping. But obviously if I have someone and I hear that there’s trauma involved, then I have to you know, pass them on to a therapist or psychiatrist depending which very often I leave to them, I will just tell them that this is something that cannot handle, there’s something somewhere in there that you need to look at with another professional. But most of the time, we handle it pretty well with coaching and just being aware and you know, creating space. And then adding the physical part to it is just basically the gold mine, you know, we always find something and that comes in body mind combination, it’s just a golden ticket.
David Ralph [26:03]
Now I remember back in 2016, our conversation as normally does happen on Join Up Dots in some degree, leaned towards sexy time. Now I’m not gonna go, I’m not going to go there. This time. Because I’ve grown up, I’ve thrown up Christine, I’m going to go the opposite side of the fence fair, because me and my wife, we were fortunate some of our kids had moved down. And so we’ve now got that we’ve got double beds all over the place. And sometimes I get so tired, I’m so tired, I need a good night’s Kip, I’m going to go into the spare room. And I go into the spare room and I put my head down and I wake up the next morning, I feel brilliant. And some of our friends our Oh, I wouldn’t do that. That’s bad for your marriage. And me and my wife go know to get a good night’s kid is great be a marriage. And it means that we you know, we love each other more. Our friends, right? Or, you know, should should we be you know, sleeping in the same room but getting bunk beds, with the women with the slides. But I can slide down like what is grommet and get dressed as I’m going?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [27:04]
Well. I mean, that word has some advantages, for sure. But otherwise, you’re totally right. I mean, social norms is just what it is. It’s just social norms, and its insecurities of other people. It has nothing to do with you or your marriage. That’s crap. It’s just because we’re used to this. And it’s because it’s been taught to us, but that is how we do things that we believe that it defines our love for each other, which we all know it does. And so you can have people who hate each other said sleep in the bed each night doesn’t define you. So you can absolutely sleep apart and still be completely love. So it has nothing to do with that. And I actually have more and more people who, who I would really use the word confessed, like you say a little bit, you know that they are preferring actually to sleep apart, especially if one of the people the two is snoring, because that can really be a problem. So I’m an absolute fan for this. And I actually think it’s really great for marriage. And it’s great because a couple notes, what is going on, you know, you don’t need to justify anything to anyone else. And I’m really a big believer in designing our life and relationships the way that we want to not the way that we were taught or that we are used to the way that is right for us.
David Ralph [28:14]
Now I can’t do that. There’s obviously some sort of social programming because I can’t do two nights, even though I think I’d love another night on my own. I think to myself, I can’t do two nights, that means that we’ve got a problem, but you’re saying no, actually, it’s not a problem at all. Just Just because basically you’re asleep anyway. And you don’t know what’s up. You don’t know what’s happening.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [28:35]
Exactly. Plus, it can be actually nice, because if you do join your partner in the bedroom later or after a few nights, it’s actually much more obvious. What,
David Ralph [28:45]
what, what’s happening. What’s happening, Christine.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [28:50]
You know, you obviously want to do a little storey time. Let’s put it that way.
David Ralph [28:54]
Little bit of storey time. That’s what I’m going to say tonight. When it’s doing better, gonna say let’s do storey time and she say what in this wherever it is where do you know how hot it is? Was it
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [29:07]
yeah, definitely do not touch.
David Ralph [29:09]
Yeah, let’s wait to October and yeah, we’re, we’re, we’re be fine on that.
Unknown Speaker [29:15]
So So when David con,
David Ralph [29:18]
I am to tonight to pay for it. So we’re coming over to America for a month soon. And we’re going to be sort of driving around and I’m always very aware abroad. They don’t suffer in the same way as the United Kingdom United Kingdom. We just sweat and we got Oh, it’s too hot. It’s too hot. And then a week later, it feels like October again. And we’re fine. Now when you go to America, and the temperature is you know, chilli chilli chilli because you have turning up the air conditioning? Is that something because once again, I argue with my wife, I say to while we’ve got the air con and I’m not paying for it. Let’s have it cold. And she says no, I don’t want it too cold. I get a blanket on this is free turning. What is the best thing? Can it be too cold to sleep?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [30:04]
Oh, yeah, absolutely. And it actually takes a lot of energy. If you’re too cold, and you need to shiver in order to keep your temperature up, it’s actually robbing your points of energy. So I would suggest I don’t have the air conditioning on as too cold, I really have it to my 21 sometimes even 22 degrees. And I never put it to freezing cold. I really, really really don’t like that. So just be reasonable with it, I guess, because of
Unknown Speaker [30:31]
David Ralph [30:32]
does. when my kids were small. He was about four or five or something. He’s now 17 we got this tent. And we got given this 10. And he wanted to use this tent straight away. And it was February. And my wife said to me, you’re not going to use the tent until the summer and I said oh, he really wants to use it. I’ll pull it up and I’ll sleep with him tonight. And and so we went It was a school night as well. So the wife wasn’t happy. And any I said this 10 top freezing, it was the snow came down. We crapped out, and we had our crisps and sweets, and we went into the skin bags, and it was freezing so cold. But when I turned my face around, because the sleeping bag was sort of keeping me warm on one side, there was a blast of cold air. And I had a shower at that morning. And he said that in the temperature in Essex is minus seven at the moment. But I had the best night’s Kip ever. So I’ve always said it was because of the cold. But maybe it’s not the cold. It’s the fresh air that gave me the best night’s sleep is it?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [31:32]
It could be that it’s a fresh and it definitely helps to pull down but within reason to fall asleep. And it might also have been your body just really setting up an energy having you literally nearly half pass out. Yes, it might be a combination of things.
David Ralph [31:48]
Now, let’s jump back as we like to do in Join Up Dots to your business. Okay. I asked this question to a guest couple of hours ago? And she said, that’s a good question. I think, well, I’m going to have this one, I’m going to use it again. And I said based on where your business was when it first started to become profitable and okay to where it is now on a scale of one to 10. Where would you say it is?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [32:15]
Oh, that’s a tricky one. But I’d say it’s at an eight.
David Ralph [32:21]
It’s almost getting towards the perfect business for you. Now.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [32:23]
It is. And I believe that I’ll be at a 10th of this business within a couple of years. Now the reason why I’m saying this business is because I don’t know how long I’ll be doing this business, I can’t imagine myself doing something completely different. In 10 years or so, you know, I don’t think that I’m just not the kind of person who will always do the same thing. I really don’t think so that’s why I consider this one business. And I love it to bits, and I want to develop it and I want to grow happy with it. And you know, as I’m doing, it’s going nicely. But at the same time, I think there’s another challenge that’s already starting to be seated in a way. So I think I will probably sell it at some point or have you know, my team take over completely. And I’ll be doing something else. So that’s why I’m at an eight I’m really happy I see exactly where it’s going and all of the tracks to go there already. And now it’s implemented in implementation patients work and to get that so
David Ralph [33:23]
I find that fascinating because you have had a lot of hardship and a lot of struggle to be known as the host of Join Up Dots favourite sleep expert, right? There’s there’s no, there’s no getting away from that is a big badge of honour. Okay. And so with that being sort of said, it’s a walk away from that and go off in a different direction. You’re starting again, from scratch on you.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [33:48]
Yeah, I think so. But at the same time, I also believe that all the lessons that I’ve learned when building this business, and the core lesson being that you actually really need to know who you are, what your values are, that will help me to skip so many kind of obstacles that I had to overcome the first time. So I think it will be a lot more a lot quicker. And like Oprah said before, you know having to become still I think I’d be able to do that more gracefully in way whereas this my moments of being still as literally mean crashing and sleeping for five days. That’s me, that’s my body in my brain forcing me to become still. And it’s getting better, it’s really getting better, where I consciously choose to take time off and to just, you know, focus. I think that so it’s just practice and I think that it will be easier for whatever I do in my future. I have no idea what the future looks like. But whatever it is, I’m making sure to work very hard to become your favourites and whatever I
David Ralph [34:50]
decide to do you will be you will be right up there. As long as you don’t mention the word shed next time you come on the show. Noise me Christy that that’s my Achilles heel that is
Unknown Speaker [35:03]
and I went right in there with you went straight
David Ralph [35:06]
in there. Absolutely. So So with the sleep thing again, is this something that is it on a different levels? Did you sort of like go to the first stage and go Actually, I’m getting a good night’s care. But actually now I want a really good night’s camp can can you do about always it just like, you, you you break it issues and then put up with what you get?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [35:29]
I think that would be overthinking it. And sleep is its own little character. So you cannot control it, you cannot take it and force it on on you. I think it’s more of considering it a relationship of the two of you, but it’s it’s doing whatever it wants to do. In the end, you can absolutely tend to making everything as perfect or as welcoming for sleep. But if it doesn’t want to it doesn’t want to you know, so? I don’t think so. I think it would stress me out. I said okay, tonight needs to be extra good. You know, so that’s not how it
David Ralph [36:05]
works. It does, though, doesn’t it? I think he does. I you’ve now gone down in my estimation as a sleep expert, because I think that I can set the the rules of having a good night’s sleep starting from about four o’clock that afternoon. I I don’t want to drink after eight o’clock, which I don’t.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [36:25]
David Ralph [36:26]
I don’t want to eat too much late and all that kind of stuff.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [36:29]
Yes. So you can definitely prepare, you know, as I said, you know, lay the tracks for a great night’s sleep and make it very welcoming for sleep so that she’s fine. She’s back,
David Ralph [36:38]
everybody. She’s She’s now number one again.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [36:41]
Now I got it. But in the end sleep still might say I don’t care. But it’s true that obviously, having a proper sleep hygiene, making sure that you went down enough time for hand is helpful versus you know, being on complete high anxiety and interest and then just going to bed and hoping that it seems too straight to come like sleep falling asleep is a process. It’s not an on an off switch button. And for some people, it’s easy. And for some people it’s more tricky. So some people a little bit more prep while others really don’t. And unfortunately, that’s how we are wired. That’s really our personality. So yeah, I always say some people are Labradors. You can see WN and some are. She was you know, as we discussed before, they are just a little bit more fickle.
David Ralph [37:27]
I’m a dead Labrador. I’ll tell you I, I literally can sleep anywhere. You know, I miss my pillow. You know, people always say, Oh, do you miss your bed? No, I can sleep anywhere. But it’s the pillow those those horrible spongy pillows that you get that you fold up them and they bounce back on you and all that. I don’t like that.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [37:47]
No, I agree. I love.
Love, Love Love. It makes such a big difference. And I can be at really nice hotels, but the pillows never the same.
David Ralph [37:56]
No, no. Now, this is the big question that I’ve been building up to. Because this is a question that has, it’s brought me down to my knees at times. You go to bed. And halfway through the night you need a way now but logical thing is let’s get up and have a way and then come back and go back to sleep again. Why do you lay there for five hours uncomfortable? Not actually sleeping properly. And the same applies when you’re cold. And the other night, right? It was really hot. So I went to bed and I thought what I’m going to sleep in the spare room, which is the duvet cover over me nothing there just to do vape and the temperature must have changed. So I got really cold during the night. I was actually laying on a bed, it would have taken me one second to climb up and actually went inside the bed. But I didn’t I lay there with my hands between my knees all night not doing anything about it. What is that? Why do we do that in the middle of the night? Why do we leave out uncomfortably instead of doing something about it?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [38:57]
Another way that you say we because I’m like what is that talking about? I just haven’t got enough. You.
David Ralph [39:03]
You’ve done. You’ve done that where you think to yourself, oh shit get out for way. But oh, just just layer I can go back to sleep. But you don’t have proper sleep.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [39:12]
Yeah, that’s why I go But again, it’s for me comfort, hope you know that it’s just going to pass and it’s depending on what you you how comfortable you are and how fast asleep you are you still really really tired You know, so it’s just the comfortable thing to do. But yeah, I would advocate you’re actually new to it. If you will fall asleep again, you’re awake anyway. So you might as well go and change your do your you know, whatever it is getting your blanket and go into the bathroom, the only thing that might be helpful is that if you have not too bright lights in the bathroom, because hitting the lights can wake you up. And it can tell the body that it’s like daytime, that might be why some people might have problems falling back asleep. But if that’s the problem, then just see if you can have a the light in the bathroom, or it’s bright enough times between the lights on that or
David Ralph [40:04]
I was turning the lights on boom, it’s like it’s like a solar eclipse in the bathroom. Because you know, you gotta you gotta know where you’re aiming as a man, don’t you. And you’ve got to be able to aim around the bowl. So it’s not noisy to wake people up, you know, there’s a certain there’s a certain survival, but I’m actually looking forward to the point when I’m old enough to just go into bed and just just go into bed. Because not only whether I have sorted out that problem, I will be warming myself up at the same time. And so both issues will be so.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [40:37]
So that’s something to look forward to. There you go,
David Ralph [40:39]
we will definitely be sleeping in single beds when I promise you. I don’t think she will put, I don’t think she will put that up. So So before I say goodbye to you, and I’m not going to send you back on the Sermon on the mic today, because it’s not that kind of show. Well, is how our three big sleep tips for people out there that really are struggling. And you you keep your three as an expert. And Ben is like top Trumps. I’m gonna see if I can do you with mine.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [41:09]
Oh, wow. So I think this, oh, it’s difficult. So
I, the person I’m talking to you right now is really the people who have already tried a lot of things, right. So it’s not necessarily for people who just haven’t done it from time to time for those who who constantly struggle with sleep. So I would say that tip number one is what I described a little bit before is to make sure that you prepared during the day in terms of, you know, becoming aware of what triggers you. And also in terms of becoming aware of nutrition, I find that very often people neglect that and it’s way too much sugar and diet or irregular eating habits. So that would be my tip number one, those two combined. Tip number two is to understand or to be aware that sleep is psychological and physiological. So if you’ve already tried to preteens if your nutrition is already great if you are started meditating, but you’re still waking up at night time, go and look deeper, go and have a look at a hormone panel food sensitivities, gut health, these things are super important for state. And then the last thing is that if you have I have a lot of people who have a kind of Rocky relationship with sleep because sleep has been so bad for so long that they are really seeing sleep as an enemy and that they start to hate their bedroom and to hate nighttime because it’s it’s just awful. And anything that you can do there is also psychological is actually to see how you can mend that relationship, whether I like a letter writing process, which sounds really weird that you’re writing a letter to sleep. But it’s actually great. And it’s about venting, and you know, really telling asleep off but then afterwards was telling him how much you would like it to work. So there’s a couple of three things that I like doing with my clients and a little bit out of the ordinary. But I think you know everything on sleep habits and things you can find it on every blog, also online. And these are the basic tips that I find a more efficient for people who really struggle a lot,
David Ralph [43:12]
right? I’m going to go with my ones and I’ve been jotting them down as you speak and be these. These aren’t medically backed up, I promise you. I think the first one I would say to people is don’t eat a heavy Carrey. Just before you go to that that’d be a great one. Secondly, sleep in a tent out in a garden in February, you have a great night’s kit and a load of fresh air. And then I think sleep with ugly people because it takes away the temptation you just get into bed and you would just go to sleep when you
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [43:45]
when you try to pretend to
David Ralph [43:48]
you would be thinking oh my god, she’s coming up the stairs. Pretend I’m asleep. Brilliant.
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [43:53]
Yeah, I felt close. Yeah,
David Ralph [43:54]
yeah. So bad. I think I think we’ve we’ve covered it. And Wait, isn’t that the perfect? Us?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [44:00]
I think we just saved the world from sleep issues worldwide. I mean, there we go.
David Ralph [44:04]
I think we have well, Christine, what’s the number one best way but how audience can connect with you?
How To Sleep Better Expert Christine Hansen [44:11]
Easy as is really to go to their websites, we talk about stuff. That’s where you find all the links to my social media channels. And if you want to get in touch with me, you can email me at info at speaker boss calm and tomorrow I will
Unknown Speaker [44:24]
guide you further.
David Ralph [44:26]
You won’t hear a thing I tell you. You’ll probably meet Christine in about five years time when she’s doing something else. That’s That’s how how tightly her PA controls these things I promise you. Well, Christine, thank you so much for spending time with us today. joining those dots again, and please come back again, when you’ve got even more dots to join up. And I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past is the best way to build our futures. Christine, always a delight. Thank you. Thank you. Christine Hanson sleep like a boss. And when I’ve called this how to sleep better with Christine Hanson. And when I first did the podcast, it was how to sleep with pristine hands. And I didn’t think that looked good splashed across social media. But she’s a lovely lady. And there’s so many tips in there. You know, I don’t really have a problem of sleeping I just generally close my eyes and go off to sleep. But it does get you every now and again. When EVO insomnia and the more anxious you become about it, the worse that that goes you know. So all those sort of little tips will make a big, big difference. And of course if you have all that energy coming back into your body because you’re sleeping well then your business will be better Your life will be better your relationships will be better sleep is king. That’s the way to do it. Until next time, thank you so much for listening to Join Up Dots. And if you need any help about starting a business, finding your dream business or simply relaxing and taking your business to the next level then jump over to Join Up Dots. Lot of good stuff there Santa
Unknown Speaker [46:02]
David doesn’t want you to become a faded version of the brilliant self you are wants to become so he’s put together an amazing guide for you called the eight pieces of advice that every successful entrepreneur practices, including the two that changed his life. Head over to Join Up dots.com to download this amazing guide for free and we’ll see you tomorrow on Join Up Dots.