Michelle Boulé Joins Us On The Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Podcast
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Introducing Michelle Boulé
Michelle Boulé is todays guest on the Join Up Dots business podcast.
She is a life coach, teacher, award-winning dancer, and choreographer of international renown.
Always believing that creativity, movement, personal growth, and healing are inextricably linked, after a seemingly dead-end dance injury at the age of 16 opened her eyes to the possibilities of holistic healing, she began a life-long study of somatics, consciousness, energy work, personal growth, and human behaviour.
Her decades of researching “how to make things possible,” be available for movement, and achieve success, give her an ability to connect to clients with precision and compassion to create “movement” in all facets of their lives.
How The Dots Joined Up For Michelle
She then became a Certified BodyTalk Practitioner in 2008, reading course manuals non-stop on her subway rides in New York and finding courses to fit in while she was dancing around the world.
Her research turned towards focusing on energy and consciousness.
This transformed her life, to say the least, with a profoundly different understanding of how the body, mind, and spirit find their fullest, most vital expression.
Another huge turning point happened 10 years later when Michelle began to consciously study the energetics and spirituality of abundance, prosperity, and success. Paradigm shift again!
So when did the realisation of “You win the inner game, you win the outer game” truly start to make sense to her?
And how does she balance the need and desire to help as many people as possible, whilst ensuring that she stays true to herself and her health.
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Michelle Boulé
Show Highlights
During the show we discussed such weight subjects with Michelle Boulé such as:
What the term “Bodysex” means and how she focuses inner energy throughout her business and life for maximum results.
We discuss the way that people without shame are truly magnetic and what that can do to your success journey.
We talk about finding the path to success in the most unlikely places, which is more often than not at the darkest points of life.
and lastly………
Why it is so important to throw away the plans that others have for you and truly live your own life on your own terms with no regret.
How To Connect With Michelle Boulé
Return To The Top Of Michelle Boulé
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Full Transcription Of Michelle Boule Interview
Intro [0:00]
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK. David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:25]
Yeah, good morning. Well, good morning to how bad hell are ya, I’m glad you’re here because otherwise I would be lonely. Now, of course, I wouldn’t be lonely. Because we’ve got a lovely lady on the show. Today. She is a life coach, a teacher, an award winning dancer, and a choreographer of international renown. Now, always believing that creativity, movement, personal growth and healing are inextricably linked. After a seemingly dead end dance injury at the age of 16 opened our eyes to the possibilities of holistic healing. She began a lifelong study of Cymatics consciousness, energy work personal growth and human behaviour. Now her decades of researching how to make things possible, be available for movement and achieve success give her an ability to connect to clients with precision and compassion to create movement in all facets of their lives. She then became a Certified BodyTalk Practitioner in 2008, reading course manuals nonstop on a subway right in New York, and finding courses to fit in while she was dancing around the world. She was hustling and grinding, and her research turned towards focusing on energy and consciousness. Now this transformed her life to say the least with a profoundly different understanding of how the body, mind and spirit find their fullest, most vital expression. Another huge turning point happened 10 years later, when she began to consciously study the energetics and spirituality of abundance, prosperity and success. Paradigm Shift again. So when did the realisation of you when the inner game you when the outer game truly start to make sense to her? And how does she balance the need and desire to help as many people as possible, whilst also ensuring that she stays true to herself and her health? Well, let’s find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Michelle Boulé. Good morning, Michelle. You’re okay. Thank you.
Michelle Boulé [2:21]
Yeah, what a what a fascinating introduction. You just gave me you really did your research.
David Ralph [2:27]
That’s what we do. We dig around, we grew, we stalk we find stuff that even people didn’t know that they said, Now I saw something I’m gonna get straight into it. It wasn’t in the introduction, but it interest me. And it said to me that you as a body sex practitioner, what is body sex?
Michelle Boulé [2:45]
Oh, my gosh, um, you know, I’m not a practitioner. But I love that you just dove right into this. There,
David Ralph [2:53]
Im a man when I saw the word sex, I thought I need to know more about it. Genuinely, when I get the opportunity. I use my body. And so isn’t that just what it is? Aren’t we all experts?
Michelle Boulé [3:06]
Yes, we are. Okay, so I want to join up some dots early on in the show, which is, you know, as a dancer, I’m dealing with my body all the time and injuries. And again, this this, this quest for me this curiosity, I should say that started probably before I was 10. And I was dancing about human potential, like allowing for something greater to come through. And obviously sexual sex, sexual energy is one of those potentials. So fast forward, not going to join up all the dots right now. But different injuries that I had, you know, I started studying the energy healing and consciousness medicine, I’m in a course where the teacher is working on me in front of about 40 people in the room. And the session that I had had nothing to do with what she was teaching, which was all about body chemistry, you know, the vitamins, allergies, toxins, and how to clear the body of all that stuff and balance your body around that it was all about my body image. And she recommended that I take a course through what the BodyTalk system that was all about releasing these past stories that we’ve held and actually coming into alignment with our sexual energy. The fascinating thing so of course, I did the course. The course is done completely naked. But it’s, you know, what you find out in that are you
David Ralph [4:26]
know, is there loads of naked people in the group? Is it about one to one?
Michelle Boulé [4:30]
It’s, in the times I’ve done it, there’s been about like six to 10 people in the room.
David Ralph [4:36]
And I actually met especially when you’re having lunch, Isn’t that awful?
Michelle Boulé [4:40]
It’s an adjustment. But you know, what’s fascinating is, you realise it’s, you know, one of the one of the things my first teacher said to me, she was like no, the person I think of as the most sexually alive person I can imagine is the Dalai Lama. And I was like, What amazing and it’s just because that energy is alive. I’d like you can see it in his face that vitality in his eyes. So, you know, the course was not necessarily about how to go home and have great sex with your partner, whoever you’re gonna have sex with. But you do open up that, that energy within yourself and literally if you know energy medicine or Chinese traditional Chinese medicine, we have this energetic field that’s called your way chi. And it’s sometimes if you see a person in front of like a white wall, you might see this like little glow around them. Some scientists think that maybe that’s actually the microbiome, which is all the microbes that we have around us. It’s like the Charlie Brown character who has the cloud, like, Oh, my God, guy. Yeah, so we have that too. And so in that course, you what you’re doing is you’re you’re just strengthening your own self image, how you feel about yourself, you’re letting go of anything that says, You’re not lovable, worthy, or you know, just that’s keeping you hidden. And literally, I would come home and people be like, What happened to you like you’re glowing? Literally, that’s like, what that glow is. So in doing that, that course, it just opened up my curiosity around okay, what what is this energy and yes, wanting to have a healthy expression of that sexual energy because it when it’s repressed, just like any energy emotions, you know, any kind of expression, it comes out distorted. And actually, what I’ve studied, it can lead to disease within ourselves, too. It’s not the natural way we’re meant to express. So I just got curious about that. And then, from my teacher in that course, she introduced me to a woman named Betty Dotson, who passed away about two and a half years ago. And she used to live in New York City had a midtown apartment, an apartment in midtown Manhattan. And she a couple years before she passed away, she was always she was also on Gwyneth Paltrow, scoop show. So she got some pretty big publicity later in her life. But what she would do are these these weekends, where a group of women would come to her living room, take off all their clothes, and be naked together for two days, and just exploring sexual energy and that expression and that freedom there,
David Ralph [7:07]
I saw that. And I, I realised that I am quite past partial to naked ladies, but not so many of them in a sort of in a non sexy way. I couldn’t watch to turn it off.
Michelle Boulé [7:23]
Okay, yeah, I didn’t I actually didn’t see the episode. But, you know, I think I think it’s an it’s an incredible thing that we we’ve just for whatever reason, you know, especially I think through some parts of western society, we’ve shut off that what is actually something that’s very healthy, you know, and it’s become taboo, and that thing becomes taboo. And then we want to hide it, we feel shamed about it, like shame and guilt, and judgement around anything just produced toxicity. And you know, I think, and then it turns into something that’s a little underground and hidden, and then we’re not available. You know, again, going back to the thing that I love human potential, like, what is it that you want to experience while you’re here have to let that be okay to let yourself have trial and error to see that everything is just everything just is, you know, and we can we can create the life that we want. So I’m making a big jump there from sexual energy. But I think it’s also just totally related that
David Ralph [8:21]
I think you’re right, it’s the being three it’s being it’s almost saying, what’s the worst that can happen? You know, the form of me getting me bits and bobs out in front of a load of people. dreadful, dreadful. I can’t think of anything more. And if I tie it back into a, I don’t know, if you’ve read the classic Napoleon Hill book, Think and Grow Rich Oh, yeah. But he basically talks about sexual transmutation where you sort of redirect your thoughts from the physical meaning of sex to, to creative efforts, and the more frustrated you get, the more you focus in on, on sort of success. I’m not very good at that. I have to be honest. But it’s interesting how we’ve got this energy in us. And we’re so easy to let the energy just go in all different directions instead of sort of channelling it, I suppose.
Michelle Boulé [9:12]
Totally. Yeah. I mean, I think, you know, from, from what I’ve studied in that book, and studied with someone who would teach from that book, you know, he, he made that chapter, it’s like, at the end, it’s kind of like, stuck in there. But I think there’s actually more to that chapter than what he’s talking about. Or he you know, he was probably aware of more perhaps, and, and it is true, you know, I had times where I’ve been in such creative production mode that I’m like, why like, where’s my second like, you know, sexual that expression energy and it’s like, oh, it’s really all been going into this other thing. So I mean, that’s that’s what the Dalai Lama to it’s like that the energy doesn’t have to result in intercourse. You know, it’s it’s we can use that energy. This is like ancient Taoist practices to to create abundance to come create clarity to create alignment because I think we can feel it too. And you know, I’ve been dancing for 40 years of my life working on, what is it? What is it to be aligned and to allow something greater to come through to allow as a dancer, expression choreography, literally, the physics, of course, so I’m not stopping something, but I’m becoming a vehicle or a conduit for it.
David Ralph [10:23]
I find this fascinating because one of the things that I say a lot on Join Up Dots, and a lot of people used to say, Well, why do you say that? Why do you say that is a stay sexy, and I never mean it about, you know, the sexy, sexy stuff. I just mean, that feeling of when you feel really good, and nothing can stop you. And you just got that inner spark. And that’s what I think sort of like sexiness is, and it attracts people that energy is it’s like a magnet. And the more you can actually, is it sort of sexiness? Or is it vibration, I suppose is all together. But it’s when things start working your way. And when you start believing in yourself even more, when you play sport, and you shy away. The well doesn’t look in your direction. But when you say actually, I’m feeling pretty good today, when things magic occurs, I suppose.
Michelle Boulé [11:21]
Totally. And I love that you say that. And you know, we all know that sex sells. There’s something about that, like we want about it. But you know, the thought that comes to mind, as you’re saying this is a colleague said this last year, she was like people without shame are magnetic. You know, and I think part of the thing is, is there’s so much that we want to hide around our bodies. And it’s because we’ve learned it right. Like I remember I had friends come from Finland to visit me in New York, and they were showing me their family vacation pictures. And the husband was like, Oh, my God, don’t don’t mind that we’re all naked, we’re just finished.
David Ralph [11:59]
I can only imagine.
Michelle Boulé [12:03]
You know, it’s just but I think that thing about there’s no shame, it’s like, it goes, it goes back to a like a basic you love the universe, like everything is here to express more life. Shame actually shuts down our life expression. You know, so when we, when we remove that, it’s like, I you know, I’ve taught dance for a long time. And I would hear dancers say there’s that person in the room who they’re just moving, and they’re not hiding, there’s no shame and everyone wants to watch them. You know, it’s that they’re open to that. They’re available to that expression. So I think there is, you know, it’s how we interpret the meaning that we’ve given to that word sexy, and I think it’s bigger than what we see on magazines and on, you know, commercials?
David Ralph [12:47]
Well, I’ll be honest, I watched a video of you dancing on your website. And this, this is a compliment, but it’s gonna sound like an insult Michelle, but part of it, I thought he was having a seizure. It was like you kind of lost yourself. And you were just like throwing yourself around. And I thought to myself, is she sort of like, is she is this part of the choreograph choreography? Or is she just so into it? She has sort of lost what you’re doing? Do you notice the sort of video I’m talking about?
Michelle Boulé [13:20]
No, I don’t do you? Can you give me more? I’m having thoughts about
David Ralph [13:24]
your website? Yes, you’re on all fours in a recording studio or something. And you’re literally just thrashing yourself around like, like a lunatic. And I watched it. And I thought to myself, Is this part of her game? Does she not care? Does she you know, what, what was that?
Michelle Boulé [13:41]
Yeah, I think I know what you’re talking about. So that was to man, what’s the name of the song? I can’t remember the name of the song was, but literally, that section was about the way we box ourselves in so the start of that section. And actually, this is something that a lot of people would respond to live, but like, oh my god, like, what is that? And yeah, it’s not like everyone’s drawn to it, it can repel as well. Right? So, but literally, that moment started out as I was, like, very choreographed and calculated, and very precise and rhythmic. And I was thinking about as I was creating it, the ways that we restrain ourselves. So it does build over the course of the three to five minutes that that section is where it becomes improvised. And I am just letting everything go. And it does build it is it is built up to a climactic moment where actually stand up and I let out the scream and the music stops. I think that’s the section you’re talking about. Yeah. And, and it really was, it was about, you know, I was thinking I bring in a lot of different things when I’m dancing or choreographing. But yeah, it was for sure thinking about women. But that was the point. And, you know, it’s fascinating. I would hear this a lot when I was performing and one of the first times I heard it was In 2009, I was in a piece that was when I won my first Bessie award for, we want it as a team for making that piece. But also, I want it for my performance in that piece. And the best it is the equivalent of like in the New York dance scene of like the Grammys or the Oscars or whatnot. And I played James Dean. And there’s a moment at the end, I’ve been dressed as James Dean the whole time, there’s a moment at the end, where I take out, I throw off the wig, I throw off all my clothes, and we just we just open up into release. And we, you know, I wasn’t completely naked.
David Ralph [15:40]
You’ve got a problem, Michelle, I just keep the clothes on for at least half a day.
Michelle Boulé [15:46]
I keep in mind, and I keep them off to what I want to. But what someone said to me after that show, he was like you, you, you allow us to be cathartic and to be like to release our craziness, you know, to release what we’ve been holding in by what you do on stage. Because everyone is in them has like a degree of like, just that, that that whatever that potential energy is. And sometimes we need a little bit of like, either catharsis or someone else, like really opening our eyes or pushing us into seeing something in a different way to allow that to open up within ourselves. So. So that particular section, it is like that you’re talking about it is like total abandonment. And I think it part of that solo that you’re referring to to is called the mono myth and the journey that a person based it on Joseph Campbell’s writing the journey a person goes through, to do that deep inner work, to be able to then like bring a gift back to society. You know that because because what I was thinking about when I was making that piece was loneliness. I was touring a lot, I was seeing how lonely people were seeming in the world are hearing about it a lot about how people aren’t allowed to be who they are, or that it’s repressed in different societies. And then I also was like, Okay, what’s the other thing about loneliness? This is a place where we also need solitude to be able to go through deep transformation. And a lot of the work I do with my clients is like, what is the unique thing in you that wants to open up that wants to be expressed, that wants to be made manifest in the world. And that’s, I’m there to guide someone, but it’s just giving them the permission to do it themselves. And to open open that potential up.
David Ralph [17:39]
Yeah, I can see this. Let’s hear from Jim Carrey. And we’d be back with Michelle,
Unknown Speaker [17:43]
my father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [18:09]
Now said in a different way, you could say you might as well take a chance on just being yourself. You know, I was talking the other day. I love Jim Carrey films. And the more stupid he is, the better in my view, my wife absolutely hates him can’t bear him. And even in his most sensible one, she says, Oh, no, I’m not gonna watch it, you stupid? Oh, no, he’s not stupid, but in a lot of them. And I was saying to my son the other day, that the genius of him and other people is they’ve created their own genre. Anybody that comes along, now you’d go, it’s just doing a Jim Carrey, or he’s just, you know, doing that. And when you are that authentic to yourself, you actually become the category of one, and then you start winning the game a lot easier. So what we’re talking about up to this point, is really just going, it’s okay, it’s okay to be myself. I don’t have to conform. I don’t have to play what other people want me to play because actually, it’s more tiring. And I’ve got an energy in me that needs to be expressed. I used to always be myself in careers. And I can see it held me back massively because they wanted me to conform and I never really wanted to, which is why I quit. Now, when you work with people is that one of the big things that you have to get them to overcome right is all right to make it up and just just be be who they are.
Michelle Boulé [19:41]
Yes, 100% Because I you know, I still go through that journey in different ways for myself and like, you know, ask, What will let me go back to clients what I always do is I start with what do you want, right? Because in the in the conformity in this stage when we’re zero to seven years old, and we can’t We can’t we have no power to choose. We’re just in theta, brainwave state, we’re absorbing everything from the people that raised us parents, teachers, family, clergy, if that’s the case, you know, and so that becomes a bit of a blueprint for how a person can live the rest of their life. And there’s even that Jesuit saying of like, show me the boy at seven, and I’ll show you the man or something like that, you know, but it’s, uh, you know, part of the journey that I help people with, which I think is natural for everyone, and it’s just part of our human journey, is that we have to come to a point where we decide what we want individually, I should say, Well, you know, like what you want individually. And it’s in that it’s in those moments, like what you’re saying, where we come into that authenticity, where we’re, we’re dropping the fear that it’s not safe to be who I am, it’s not safe to ask for what I want. And you know, if I’m just so curious, like, if people really tapped into that, and took personal responsibility for that, like, what, what a different world we would have
David Ralph [21:01]
it, but the trouble is Michelle, with that people don’t know, you know, you say to them, what do you want? And they go oh, I don’t know. I don’t know.
Michelle Boulé [21:10]
But you know, what, what I think like this, is that a person? What I always say was, what if you didn’t know what you want? Because part of that conditioning is people have turned off their own desire, because they were they. And I find this if I’m doing like inner child work with someone, it’s like, something will come up when they really wanted something as a kid, because what I’ll ask sometimes is like, when did you make this contract that it wasn’t okay to ask for, you know, for being seen or for, for feeling loved, or for having enough time for yourself? And they’ll just go in intuitively and be like, oh, five years old? And you know, I might ask them, okay, well, what was happening then, and we might come up with a really specific scene where they were like, Oh, this, this was a moment when I really wanted my dad’s attention. But I don’t know, he kept coming home drunk, or he was he was, he was never there, you know, or he would come home, so tired, and I really wanted to play. And so so a child learns to start turning off their desires. And we start what we do is we all start to modulate our behaviour, and not allow ourselves to ask for what we want to express ourselves in the ways that we want to, and it’s this fine line, because yeah, we need to be able to, first of all survive, like be accepted by the families are the group that were raised in. But it’s, it’s that interesting conflict that people start to face in their lives when I feel like whenever a person is really trying to expand and grow, they have to come to the truth of who they are and what they want in life.
David Ralph [22:38]
And that’s scary, isn’t it? To actually get it to that point?
Michelle Boulé [22:42]
Yeah, but the only reason it’s scary is because we’ve been conditioned to believe that it is scary. So yes, like a person, you know, I’ve had this for myself going into like sweats or like shaking when I’m going, maybe something about like trying to make more money, you know, doing a really big sale. And then I realised, wait a second, I’m actually safe or in a relationship, like really expressing what I want. So we think it’s scary, we quote unquote, think it isn’t actually our body thinks it is. But when a person does it enough times and realises they’re safe, and there’s nothing’s going wrong, then you know that the neurons start to build and build a new pathway, that old belief system starts to fade away, and you can create a new highway, realising you are completely safe being who you are, because ultimately, this is the thing we forget. Because we didn’t have it as kids all the time. We always have the power to choose.
David Ralph [23:35]
Now, I always have this fantasy, and I think I might have spoken to a couple of guests about it, of the liberation, you would feel if you was just put on an island with nothing. And you could basically just reinvent yourself. You’re the first person on this new this new world. But it’s the is the anchoring, isn’t it? It’s the responsibility. You know, I am very aware. I’ve got two ageing parents now. And one of them basically is become disabled in a year ago, she was perfectly alright. And now she’s disabled, just sitting in a chair. And the only words that come out of her mouth really is I can’t, I can’t and it doesn’t matter if she has, you know, it could be going to the movies. I take you to the movies. Mom, I can’t go to the movies. Yeah, but you went last week, what’s different hours, it’s just different. And the other person, my dad, he’s very much about things won’t work, no matter what happens. So she’s got I can’t do it. And he’s sort of I won’t do it. And so you get caught up, get trapped in the middle of it. Now I’m raising a family myself of sort of five kids and grandkids and all that I want them to know is have fun, enjoy yourself. You know, don’t put too much pressure on yourself and then just focusing on where the bliss is basically, and that’s that’s my whole remit and I sit with other people’s parents. When we go out for meals, and they kind of almost suggest that I’m not taking it seriously enough, because I’m not driving my kids to do physics and to do maps, and you know, all these kinds of things that my kids hate.
Michelle Boulé [25:14]
Yeah, I mean, it’s a two things here. One is it’s making me think that one of my most popular blog posts is about the four most powerful words you can hear. And it’s, you can do this, you can do this. Yes, that’s four words. You know, and I think, you know, everything you’re saying, it’s just these are programmes that we’ve been programmed meaning belief system, ways of operating in the world, that we have believed for a long time, of course, would keep us safe. Right? Like, we’re trained to be safe, what get the job study this and so that’s, you know, I’m sure you know, this, it’s like, yeah, study physics, be be do math, like, all that stuff. Or, you know, be a doctor. That’s what I was told to, and I wanted to be a dancer. It’s like, Michelle, you’re you graduated valedictorian from high school, you should be a doctor, an engineer, and I wanted to dance.
David Ralph [26:03]
So So what made you go, No, I’m gonna be a dancer. I don’t care. Well, where did you find that strength?
Michelle Boulé [26:10]
Gosh, you know, that’s a great question, too, because it might have in part been my high school boyfriend who was like the only other artist in like, really practising artists that I was aware of, in our community in our high school. And he, his family, you know, they’re, they’re a little, they’re, they had more of an artistic inclination, I did not have that growing up. I actually got injured at 16 and had to quit. And that was probably one of the times in my life where my vitality was turned off the most, like if I if, if I don’t know, depressed, maybe, but it’s just you can see it and photos of me during that time. My eyes are not bright, my body changed. And so I think it was, what happened was, I quit, I thought I was done. And I went to the University of Illinois at my dad’s encouragement, or maybe, rule. And I had no idea that they had a dance programme there. But one day, I’m walking down the street, and I see a sign that says, dance studio. Like, oh, my God, there’s a dance studio here. And I will I walk in the building, I look in the window, and you know, at the studio, and I see a bunch of people dancing, it was a non majors course, it was really literally a bunch of like, you know, football players, or scientists or people who weren’t dancers kind of bopping around. I was like this dance. But I did go home. And I opened up my paper course catalogue, because this is in the late 90s. And I found a dance class, and I started dancing again. And it was just curiosity. You know, I had not been dancing for a good two years, probably at that point, or year and a half. And I just kept following it. Okay, I want to take the next dance class. Oh, let me see if I can fit this into my schedule. And eventually, I was taking a class with the dance majors and ask the professor if I could have a mid semester review. Like all the other dance majors,
David Ralph [28:06]
let me just stop you there. Because I got a question. Yeah, that two year break you had was and where you became smaller? Did Do you think you actually needed that? Did Soviet you come back? And it was like, No, I really loved this. I thought, I thought I loved it. But once it was taken away from me, this is what I really love.
Michelle Boulé [28:28]
Well, this is what happened was I was just told by people that I didn’t have the body for it that, you know, I just needed to stop. So that’s what I came to believe. And, and, and, and so I turned like speaking you know, desire, I turned it off within myself. It also coincided with a breakup with that particular high school boyfriend. So it was like double whammy of bad news. And, and then it was just like, I let myself be curious. Again, I saw this. They know I saw the dance programme. I went in into class. And I and I just, it was like little bit by little bit. I wasn’t like now I’m going to be a dancer. Again. I didn’t know I just knew that this was the next step. The next step was to ask my teacher can I have this review? And she literally said to me, why aren’t you doing this? And I literally said, because I can’t. And she was like, hmm, you’re doing it, and you’re doing it really well. And next thing I knew I had a scholarship for the dance programme. And I called my parents to tell them that I finally had a major because I did not know what to do with myself. And didn’t let it be a long conversation. But you know, my my, just I think if a person has the slightest bit of curiosity, let me try this. It starts to open up the door to the next step. And that’s what it was for me. I wasn’t like now I’m going to be a dancer. Now. I’m going to do all this again. It was just like all I could take from it like a dosage perspective, was just do this next thing and do this next thing. And I think it’s actually a really good thing too. Look at for any person who is trying to open up to more potential or more success. And as we can get intimidated by how big someone is, like we, you know, we see these stories where all of a sudden someone pops out and they’re there. They’re a huge success, but we don’t see all the little steps that a person took. So
David Ralph [30:19]
overnight success.
Michelle Boulé [30:20]
Yeah, exactly. You have to keep the 10 years in front of there, the 10,000 hours in front of there. So I think, you know, it was just that that little by little that led me to the next thing. And then it’s all course correcting, right? Like, if I didn’t have going through these extensive injuries, it would not have led me to understanding the body in the way that I do now understanding energy, medicine, consciousness, healing, and then being able to, in my late 30s, realise, you know what, I have to figure out how to make more money, because my life is not going to change, and then having to do having to undo all the paradigms I had around money, prosperity and abundance, to then be able to make quantum leaps in my income in that way. And then to be able to help other people do either that or whatever, whatever other way, they want to make a quantum leap in their life.
David Ralph [31:09]
It’s, it’s more than fascinating this because every single person be included, but I’ve had the not the pivot, but the collapse, I suppose, where your life’s been taken away from you. You know, I, I bought a weld with this, but it’s so important, but I got so burnt out. I was close to death. Really, I look back on it now. And I think, yeah, well, what an idiot. But from that point on, everything changed for the positive. You know, it took me a while to get the steam up to start really looking after myself, looking after my beliefs, the way I energise myself, as we were talking, before the recording, that desire to just build assumption on me, it was never part of my life, I was always busy, I would never just stand somewhere and look up at the sun and just feel it on me. But now, I know that they’re the key elements that bring it all together. And my business has become more powerful, because of the difficulties I went through. But a lot of people will quit their jobs or they will go into something. And they’re just a kind of diffused version of what’s out there already. They don’t actually have the backstory. And once you’ve got the backstory, that is the experience, that’s the growth, that’s when it changes forever. And that’s when people look in your direction. And they say, Yeah, he is sexy, she is sexy, because they’re looking at the life experience.
Michelle Boulé [32:43]
Yeah, the life experience in the life expression that you’ve chosen. Right? Because, you know, as you’re saying, like any person could have decided to shut that down. And I really believe that that’s not if I can say this, like a higher self decision. That’s a programme decision. You know, that’s, you know, when I when I hear the intro to your show, it reminds me of Earl nightingale’s The Strangest Secret. I don’t know if you’ve ever listened to that. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And it’s just like, he’s talking about how it’s talking about men time it was recorded, but, you know, we have these these desires, and then why did we start to shut them down? You know, and it’s it, we can see this pattern in the way a child is raised, like everyone wants a child to walk, like a walk, walk, walk, walk, walk, and the child’s like, I’m going to be the president, or I want to do this. And then these other belief systems come in when maybe you don’t want to be the president. But I would agree with that, perhaps. But you know, if you get like, I want to be the President’s like, Okay, be the president, what do we need to do? Like, why do you want to do this? Like, really get them involved to see why they might be making that decision to right, rather than just, you know, so they’re consciously thinking as they grow, but what I want to say is, is we, at some point, you know, a parent or a teacher might say, like, well, you need to get better grades, or you’re not the right height, or you’re not good looking enough, or you’re not smart enough. Like,
David Ralph [34:07]
I have no support. I want you in my life. And I remember saying to my mum, she says, What do you did you want to do? And I said, I want to be a radio host. And I remember this distinctly. And she said, Well, you never make money on that, you know. So she got me a job in a bank. And I was in the bank for 10 years, you know, I just didn’t know what I wanted to do. Because that inspiration of doing something got taken away from me. And so I didn’t pressurise it, I didn’t move towards it. Then I did 10 years in insurance, and then at the end of that 20 year period, I kind of went Now hang on, hang on, you know, life is passing me by here. I’m gonna, I’m gonna be old quite soon, you know, eight and he doesn’t move very, very quickly. And so that’s when I created a podcast and stuff. I didn’t kind of connect it back To my passions of a young child, until many sort of years into it, and it was only because I started dwelling back, because although I call it Join Up Dots, and we say, you know, you connect the dots to find out how to build your futures. I don’t do that at all, really, I’m always looking at the next thing I’m future facing. And very rarely do I actually sit there and reflect on, on what I’ve already learned. But when you realise what you’ve already learned, most of us have got the skills to move forward. It’s just that we don’t focus in on once again, life experience.
Michelle Boulé [35:36]
For sure, I mean, I have definitely seen people who can’t take the next step forward, because they keep looking back. You know, there may be something that happened, something that was difficult, some kind of trauma or tragedy. And, and yes, I do feel like we can learn from those. But I think there is a point where a person can get stuck in that, and actually had a woman say this to me, in New York, I’m working in office job, or in my early dance career. And I did do therapy, and it was helpful, you know, I had never done anything like that before. But this woman who was my boss at the time, she was like, Yeah, eventually it turns into navel gazing, you know, and you can get stuck there. But, you know, I’ll just say there are very powerful therapists out there. And I think it’s a great thing to do. But I think I think it’s, you know, we need to be very cognizant of that, that point where we’re not growing, because that saying is true, like, if you’re not growing, you’re dying. And, and it’s, it is one of the universal laws, like we are here to grow and express more life, just like every other creature and plant on this planet. You know, we as humans have this ability to choose unlike, at least as far as we know, and like other other things on this planet. So our, our challenge is to choose in the direction of life. And, you know, as we continue to do that, I think that that is when we create the magic and that is when we, we start to break through, you know, even you as an individual, me as an individual, any person I, you know, if I’m coaching a parent, I see that effect, like, that person makes changes in their life, the parent makes changes in the kids go off of anxiety medication, the kids start to get more independent, they start to know who they are, rather than, like clinging to leading the parent all the time. So it’s, I mean, and that’s a fascinating thing, like nature does that in a different way. From the get go, like I’ve studied brain development, and this guy, Matthew Newell talking about how we, we hold our kids way too much in the beginning, like we need to get, we need to get them moving right away to develop their brains and their, their level of independence and strength in a you know, to, to be able to grow. And I feel like that’s probably I’m just gonna make this connection. I don’t know if it’s true, reflective of the, you know, this, suppose it’s statistic that we only use 10% of our potential, our nervous system potential or brain potential.
David Ralph [37:51]
Yeah, I read something the other day. And I thought, yeah, I agree with this totally whether it’s true or not, I made perfect sense. But they were saying that the the asthma rate in kids in the United Kingdom, and America is off the charts compared to India, and China. Were basically over here, we use pacifiers and dummies, as we call them. As soon as the baby cries, we put it in their mouth, and they don’t get really strong lungs. And so in other countries where they just let them cry, they’re developing really strong lungs, and, you know, but not being protected at all. But nature is kind of saying, that’s okay. We’re going to show you how to look after yourself by just being yourself.
Michelle Boulé [38:35]
Yeah, yeah. And also, side note, you know, I know, I’ve studied the microbiome, and also, they’ve done there’s been studies done where kids who grow up like, it’s actually kids who have brothers or boys usually have a stronger immune system or in pets, because they’re exposed to more dirt. Yes. Yeah. You know, and we’ve been in this time of like, sterilise and clean everything, and we’re actually weakening our immune systems, but
David Ralph [38:58]
that’s why you saw your boys. Is that what you’re saying? I just realised I’m one of them.
Michelle Boulé [39:05]
Let’s keep more of them around. I mean, you know,
David Ralph [39:07]
I changed my underpants once a week. I look after myself.
Michelle Boulé [39:13]
Oh, that’s amazing. I mean, you know, that could be conditioning too. Right? But I don’t know if that’s a biological thing that boys actually are more dirty. You know, but it’s it’s maybe like the boy is like encouraged to go like be out in the world a little bit more like play in the dirt. Do all that stuff, girl, keep yourself clean. You know, like, don’t do that. Don’t get dirty. Who knows. But, but they have done studies where that’s that’s been the case.
David Ralph [39:34]
I can tell you I have guys. I’ve got a boy now who’s 20 and I’ve got a daughter who’s just turned 17 today, and if you go into their bedrooms, one of them just smells quite pleasant. And the other one smells like a badger has died and crawled under the bed. I won’t tell you which room is what. But there is a distinct odour where one you go in with a protective mask and you have a When you’re perfectly fine I’ll leave it to you to guess, let’s hear from Steve Jobs.
Unknown Speaker [40:07]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future, you have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road, will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [40:42]
So you did go off the well worn path, you went off a path that you thought was perfect for you. And then you found another path. Is it just a different path? Or is it more perfect?
Michelle Boulé [40:56]
Are you talking about from like dancing into coaching? Yeah. Yeah, you know, I’m not done being a dancer. And, you know, I don’t know how that will eventually, or, you know, continue to show up in my life. But I do feel like these last couple of years of really studying prosperity. It’s like, it’s another tool. It’s another tool in my tool, chest. And in all of it, all of it is related to movement. And I think one thing that I have taught a lot over the years is that we can make our life a dance, we can make our life, a song, a poem, a story, you know, we make the story of it. So it’s, you know, I have definitely had moments of a lot of tears when I feel like that part of me has left I’m not dancing in the way I used to. But I think what I’m what I’m figuring out now is how does it continue to fit into my life? Of course, I’m ageing also. So I’m not doing the same amount of things. But But I’m not done. I think everything on a base level for me is about how do we open up to more potential? How do we open up to more life and if that’s through someone watching me dance, on the stage, or on my Instagram feed, or hearing me speak or being a client in one of my, you know, group programmes or a private client, like, I’m here to be a vehicle in the vessel for that. And of course, I have to do it first and foremost, for myself, so I understand it, and what that journey is to become available to more. And then I can share that with other people. And man, like, you know, just to look at other people who are doing the same. And I want to Join Up Dots in that way, like, you know, to just continue to connect to people who are, are succeeding and who are on this path of openness and curiosity, because, honestly, I think just a lot of people don’t have they’re misinformed, we don’t have a lot of information, we’re not taught certain things. And the more I think we can, we can spread this awareness of what it really takes to you know, what we’ve been talking about, be yourself, I think the more empowered and actually peaceful our world will be, because people will be taking personal responsibility for how their lives are showing up. And really getting to the root of what makes a difference. And I know some of that may seem a little abstract, but but for me, that’s been the journey. And that’s how I want to help the people I work with to, or the people who watch me perform or speak.
David Ralph [43:21]
Now I call this a caveat to this conversation is, you know, the real journey is finding the thing that you love doing, and then getting paid for it. Yeah, that’s, that’s, that’s the big stretch. That’s the bit that takes, you know, double the amount of time because you’re you’re learning new skills, when you’re learning things that complement you’re learning how to connect with people, you’re learning, marketing, you’re learning sales, you’re learning all these things back. That’s where people really do struggle shopping.
Michelle Boulé [43:50]
Yeah, for sure. And you know, what’s fascinating is being an artist in New York City for 21 years, I was around a lot of scarcity mentality, you know, and going into studying this work around prosperity. What’s fascinating is, I would not have fathomed before that I could make, you know, one of my big breakthroughs was I made a $30,000 sale via text message. And then again, like I, you know, I could sign like a $72,000 or $100,000 contract, like that was not something I would have dreamed of, you know, having someone pay me that, and to be able to serve them in a way that that they were really happy about. So, when I talked to, you know, I was talking to a museum director, about all of this work, and I said, you know, I think what this has given me is the ability if I wanted to make a piece again, to be able to easily say would you donate $50,000 to this project, and she was like, you could ask her 100 The way you’re talking, she was she was done a lot of development work and, and I think it’s like that. Like to have have learned that is an amazing skill. Do I know it’s actly where it’s going next? No, but I just know that you know what you’re saying about gut. I know what’s so important, which I do believe is when we also take those moments to look up at the sunshine, is we start to hear that inner guidance. And we may not know like, I have no idea entirely yet. I have some ideas why I left New York City. People were like, Why are you leaving, you have this great apartment like this great career. And I was like, I don’t know, I just know, my next stage of growth is not meant to happen here. I did conveniently leave, like a couple months before the pandemic actually happened, which was nice, in some ways. But I don’t know. And I think one of my the sort of, like, intentions that I have is can I have, please give me enough courage to take the next step? Because I know in growth, there’s always that moment where we know what the next thing is. And for me, I used to call it the like, like, I would say, it’s like the OH, FUCK moment of like, Oh, God, I need to do this. You know, and so, my, my, sort of like prayer to myself, the universe is like, just for courage to take the next step. Because I think that’s, that’s the place where people know. And if we can build that courage and not turn around and look backwards again, build that courage to step into the unknown. That’s when transformation happens.
David Ralph [46:23]
Yeah. And of course, in New York, you can’t take more than two steps. Last time I was there was just before the pandemic. I’ve never know. pavements and what you called her mom’s sidewalks. But we’re so busy. It was lit. You know, you were queuing up from the moment you walked out your apartment. It was ridiculous.
Michelle Boulé [46:41]
Yeah, I mean, it’s it’s a great city, you know, it has it
David Ralph [46:44]
is brilliant. But they breed like rats, they must be breeding rats bear because the amount of people I’ve never seen anything like it. Well, we’re going to take you on one last journey. And this is the journey that we’ve been building up to that we called a sermon on the mic when we send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could speak to Michelle, what age would you choose? And what advice would you love to give her? Well, we’re gonna find out because we got to play the music and when it fades, it’s your time. This is the Sermon on the mic
Unknown Speaker [47:21]
we go with the best bit of the show the Sermon on the mind, the sermon on.
Michelle Boulé [47:39]
So to 15 year old Michelle, Michelle, you’re amazing. Michelle, you’re amazing. Don’t worry about what other people think. Let go of doing it, right. Let go the judgement, the criticism and all that bullshit that you’ve learned to believe. And trust
Unknown Speaker [48:07]
that your knee. Go out there
Michelle Boulé [48:13]
and do what you want and let your light shine and ask for what you want. And know that in doing that. You are serving yourself and everyone else at the highest level and you will create a beautiful life.
David Ralph [48:28]
You certainly will I know that for sure. So Michelle, what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you? I feel like singing that now. But I want but I’m at what is the number one best way to connect with you.
Michelle Boulé [48:41]
They can go to Michelle boulais.com. It’s Michelle mi ch e ll e Boulais. B for boy, o u l e.com. And usually we have a free resource up there it changes from time to time but sign up for that get on my email list. And we’ll be in conversation that way. Also Instagram or Facebook. Michelle dot Belay is Instagram. And Michelle Boulais on Facebook.
David Ralph [49:04]
Yeah, it’s almost like Michael Buble. A without a B and without something else. There’s an anagram of Michael Buble. Are you near somehow? Michelle, thank you so much for spending time with us today. Joining up those dots. And please come back again, when you got more dots to join up. Because I do believe that by joining up those dots and connecting our paths. It’s actually the best way to build our futures. Michelle, thank you so much.
Michelle Boulé [49:28]
Thank you, David.
David Ralph [49:32]
Michelle Boulé from Michelle Boulé a coaching so yeah, she studied human potential for four decades and creative expression. She’s an award winning dancer, teacher, energy medicine practitioner coach and artists. And our core is about energy and doing the thing that’s right for you not listening to other people not being directed by other people but going no, this is my life. This is what I’m here to do. And this is what I want to do. She’s done it. I’ve done it. Many people have done it, and you can do it too. And we’re always here to help you get going. Until next time, my friends you look after yourself. Thank you very much for Michelle being on the show, and everyone who’s been listening and we will be here again, with some more episodes of Join Up Dots. Until next time, see you again. Cheers. Bye bye.
Outro [50:22]
That’s the end of Join Up Dots. You’ve heard the conversation. Now it’s time for you to start taking massive action. Create your future create your life busy only you live God. We’ll be back again real soon. Join Up Dots during the gods Join Up Dots, Gods Jolina Join Up Dots
