Welcome to the Join Up Dots business coaching podcast with Steve Olsher
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Introducing Steve Olsher
Steve Olsher is todays guest on the Join Up Dots business coaching podcast interview.
When you see someone boldly state that they were born to make money, you either think that this guy is very bold, or he is very good at what he does.
Today’s guest seems to be both, and from his base in San Diego California is spinning many plates as he literally loves the life he lives (and gets paid very well to live it too!)
He is the New York Times bestselling author of What Is Your WHAT? Discover The ONE Amazing Thing You Were Born To Do, the Business Technology Book Of The Year, Internet Prophets: To name just a few of his publications
And he also appeared in the ground-breaking film, The Keeper of the Keys, alongside Jack Canfield and John Gray
How The Dots Joined Up For Steve
But there is no getting away with the fact that at his core, he is a hustler who works incredibly hard, has passion by the bucket load, and has honed his talents from opening his first nightclub back in 1989, through to starting a wine business with his Mum.
And I guess the question is now with a real estate business, wine business, keynote speaker business…..how does he know What is his WHAT?
And do you find your what naturally, or do you have to take action and try many many different things to get there?
Well lets find out as we bring onto the show to start joining up dots with the one and only Mr Steve Olsher.
During the show we discussed such weighty topics with Steve Olsher such as:
How your “WHAT” will change over time but the essence will remain the same. You just need to tap into the clues of your life to find that thing you were born to do.
Why he now believes that his kids have never seen him do a days work in his life, and would love the legacy of bringing creativity into their lives.
Why he operates like a rocket fuelled drag-car. Huge action for small bits of time, to then rest before blasting the engines again.
How he remembers hitting rock bottom in 2013, and needed to seek answers to why he was feeling so bad, that simply changed his life forever.
Books By Steve Olsher
How To Connect With Steve Olsher
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Audio Transcription For Steve Olsher
David Ralph [0:00]
Do you have a business that can’t get going or would love to create your own one that works, wants to sleep and is built around the things you love? Well, podcasters mastery is the place to go. To learn the six simple steps to create a business that flourishes connecting with thousands of customers that tell you what products they want. podcasters mastery is the online route to business success. Check us out now.
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling join up dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK David Ralph
David Ralph [0:48]
Yes, everybody. Yes, I’m back in a garden in the United Kingdom. And this is Episode 429 of join up dots and it’s one of those shows I didn’t expect to be with coding. Because if you’re listening, Mr. Bill Gates, what’s the matter with Windows 10? How come when you update it all your system doesn’t operate at all, like you were doing beforehand. It’s like buying a brand new car, then being told that the wheels don’t operate, you’ve got to sort of build up your own wheels, it’s lunacy. And also, while I’m on the subject, I didn’t expect to get Randy straight away, but I’ve had a stressful day. Why do we have to go into the corners to find buttons that don’t exist on our computer? Why can’t we just have him where we can see Anyway, I’ve got that off my chest now so I’m ready to record. So let’s bring on today’s guest. When you see someone boldly stated they were born to make money your other thing and this guy is very bold, or he’s very good at what he does today’s guests him to be both and he’s based in San Diego, California is spinning many places he literally loves to live he lives and gets paid very well to live it too, is a New York Times bestselling author of what is your what discover the one amazing thing you were born to do. And the Business Technology Book of the Year, internet profits to name just a few of these publications. And He also appeared in a groundbreaking film the keeper of the keys alongside our mate jack Canfield and Mr. JOHN gray. But there’s no getting away with the fact that at his core, he’s a hustler who works incredibly hard as passion by the bucket load and has owned his talents from opening his first nightclub back in 1989. Brutus starting a wine business with his mom. And I guess the question is now with a real estate business wine business, keynote speaker business? How does he know what he’s What is? And do you find your walk naturally? Or do you have to take action and try many, many different things to get there? Well, let’s find out as we bring on to the show to start join up dots with the one and only Mr Steve Olsher. So how are you sir?
Steve Olsher [2:44]
I am doing great. Thanks for having me on.
David Ralph [2:46]
It is lovely to have you on because you are a kind of a podcasting legend. You are somebody that falls into that rare category or having a show but I will come back to time and time again. It’s a good show reinvention radio is if you haven’t listened to it, go over to listen to Steve because it’s quite a rant, isn’t it? You and your co hosts like to get things off your chest in a way that is well. It’s quite amusing to listen to.
Steve Olsher [3:13]
Well, yeah, I mean, look, we try to keep it. Obviously there’s going to be some education, God forbid, but we certainly do try to keep it on the on the entertaining front, you know, first and foremost. So yeah, man, I’ve got a co host Mary we she’s been in radio for 25 years. reinvention radio actually started as a terrestrial radio show. And technically, it still is a terrestrial radio show, but we repurpose it as a podcast, which is why it has I guess, as you said, you know, a little bit more of a breakfast morning kind of flavor. But yeah, each each episode, we’re reinventing something. So reinventing sex, reinventing money, reinventing marketing, reinventing, you know, women entrepreneurs, reinventing pornography, you name it, we’ve got that that’s what we do each and every show.
David Ralph [3:56]
Well, a few of those certainly appealed to me, I have to say, I don’t know how you you can actually reinvent the sex phone that is kind of mastered, isn’t it over the last 200,000 years or whatever?
Steve Olsher [4:07]
Yeah, you know, and some of us master it more often than others. But you know, it Look, it’s a masculine
David Ralph [4:13]
mindset. I can tell you Yeah, right.
Steve Olsher [4:17]
You work out of the back of your garage. So I you know, I mean, it’s, it’s something you’ve mastered, I’m sure.
David Ralph [4:23]
They keep me away from the public as much as possible. They really do.
Steve Olsher [4:26]
So do you? Are you Jared moving forward now? No, I don’t know. So.
David Ralph [4:32]
But did you actually enjoy as in? Is it something that falls into your wallet? Because I as I mentioned in through in the introduction, I can’t get a stare on what your What is? Do you know what your What is? Is? is it doing the radio show? You know,
Steve Olsher [4:47]
it’s interesting, right? So the the whole concept of answering the question of what is your what is something that I’ve been dancing around for about eight years now? And the God’s honest truth man is at the end, what you’re referring to is I put the book I put on the New York Times list, what you mentioned was what is your what discover the one amazing thing you were born to do? It’s really, I guess, the better way to say it, it’s really well, let’s think about it this way, discover the one amazing thing you were born to do for now, right? Because, you know, as much as I believe that we each are wired to excel in very specific ways. I also know that as you look at the what is your what equation which is combined of your gift, which is your primary gift, I mean, you each, I don’t know what your gift is probably to your communication. I mean, that’s my hunch is one of those two, just based on the work that you do. And then you have the vehicle that you use to share that gift with the world and the people that you’re most compelled to serve. So I do believe that your gift is static throughout your entire life. But the vehicle you use and the people you serve, definitely are more organic, definitely more fluid. And those can change over time. So, you know, I guess you could have the answer to the question that you asked is, I do believe that radio has always been a first love. It’s certainly a form of communication that I love using. Is it my What? I don’t know, man, it’s kind of the holy grail for me. So it very well might be.
David Ralph [6:12]
Because I think you are, you know, you touched on a very closely about teaching and communication. But I think at my essence, it’s connecting, being able to connect with people on either a personal level or a professional level. And that’s what podcasting gives you, isn’t it the ability to connect across the globe in a way that even in the old days terrestrial radio wouldn’t be able to reach?
Steve Olsher [6:32]
Well, you know, it’s interesting. And your podcasting obviously, has had a resurgence here. And I’m certainly guilty of being on that wave as well is, as I said, we we did as terrestrial radio show, and then now we’ve repurpose it as a podcast. So you know, again, I’m certainly on that bandwagon. So I’m not wanting to knock anybody who’s on this current way. But the reality is that it’s a good thing, right? I mean, there he is, here’s what’s going to happen, in my opinion, man, you’re going to seeing podcasting is a channel in your car, right? I mean, ostensibly, when that happens, that’s when the game really shifts because we you know, that we’ve moved from this whole sort of push environment where there’s certain people who use certain people their finger on the button, and they’re really creating all of the content and then controlling that distribution. Now, what we’re seeing is more of the pull model, where the consumer is basically saying, I want what I want when I want it. And with podcasting, you have that ability, unlike any other form of media in this genre?
David Ralph [7:35]
Well, you do, don’t you? And I think it’s the instant response. I certainly I have been in the sort of the realm of communication all my life, but I’ve never had the ability to get such wide reaching response. So quickly, I released my first show. And within about 15 minutes afterwards, I got a email from a lady in Alaska or Arizona, it began with a and she actually, you were saying she liked my work, which astonished me It could because in the early days, your work is just passable isn’t it isn’t where you want to take him for this lady to make the effort to reach out in a way, but I would never do to a terrestrial radio station or a TV network to say I like your work. It was just astonishing.
Steve Olsher [8:21]
Yeah, it’s definitely a it’s a, it’s a much more intimate relationship, right. And obviously, you’ve done 400 plus shows, man, and, you know, kudos to you on that. Because what most people end up doing is they’ll start down a new endeavor line, whatever that you know, path might be, and if they don’t get the type of response that they expect, you know, which is 28 million downloads in six weeks, you know, then they quit, you know, so I mean, the fact that you’ve stayed with this, for so long, man is just super, super impressive. But, you know, think about it, if somebody has, in fact, listen to, I mean, Hell, even 10% of those episodes, you know, assuming that your average episode is around 40 minutes or so. And now we’re talking about 40 plus episodes. I mean, you’ve been in there ahead for 400 plus minutes. And me you break that down. Yeah, that’s six plus hours of just David you know, chatting in my head. And I feel like I know, yeah, you know, so and then if you got folks that are listening to 20, 3050, 100%
of your shows, I mean, you’re like their brother.
David Ralph [9:21]
Well, that’s what you do very well, well, on your show, you literally feel like you are in the room eavesdropping on that conversation. And the more you listen to you guys, you kind of know how you’re going to go. And we know what kind of mood you’re in as soon as you recall.
Steve Olsher [9:36]
Let me let me correct you there. We have no, can I swear? Is this is this an explicit? What kind of radio Do you throw on this show? I always say if there’s a kid listening, would they want to hear it? Oh, good. Well, they’re going to hear it eventually. So yeah, we have no fucking idea what the hell we’re doing. So it’s like, I mean, really, we get it there. And we’re just kind of like, what should we talk about today and kind of kick around a couple of different ideas. And then it really just goes from there. And you know, I mean, again, the sort of going blue on that is one of the things that I do like about podcasting, because we’re not governed by the FCC. And, well, obviously, we’re here in the States. So you know, we’re not governed by those rules. So I mean, it’s really no holds barred. Look at reinvention. And and as you probably could tell, from listening to a few of the episodes, you know, it can get a little bit, shall we say, back, Elliot?
David Ralph [10:23]
Yeah, certainly does, to say the least, which is probably why I like it. So if we take you away from that, and back, actually, on your journey, because he’s been a fascinating journey, but you are a hustler, man, you and your core, you are somebody that is willing to not only take advantage of opportunities, but create your own opportunities as well. Have you always been like that? Even as a very small child?
Steve Olsher [10:47]
Yeah. And I think it’s appropriate that Larry Flynt is one of my heroes. So you know, that being said, Yes, I think I’ve always been a hustler. And I think it’s either in the DNA or it’s not, I mean, if you look at the cover, what is your what, you’ll see that the soul graphic element is a DNA strand. And I do believe that we are each naturally wired to excel in very specific ways. Now, most of us will spend a lifetime without gaining any sort of clarity around what that is. But for those that, you know, that do gain that clarity, and really honor, what that is, as I say, you know, you’re what really has chosen you. It’s not that what you have chosen, but when you honor what that is, yeah, that’s truly when the magic begins to happen when you can get out of that place of denial. And really just allow yourself to be I mean, look, well, if don’t get me wrong here. I mean, if we allowed ourselves to do everything that we truly wanted to do, and are truly wired to do, I mean, there’d be complete chaos, you know, there’d be murder, there’d be sex on the streets, there’d be Do you know, whatever else, and then, you know, there’d be Gerald Fogle, but, you know, reality is that, I do believe that, when you look at how you are naturally wired to excel, you will find clues in your life that bring you back to center of where you hit that, you know, people call it the zone, the flow, whatever it is. And for me, it’s always been built around the entrepreneurial endeavors. I mean, I’ve just whenever I have worked for anyone else, it’s not that, you know, I didn’t is that that I really couldn’t stand the job, or I didn’t do it. Well, it’s just that the people who were in charge of me, just couldn’t stand me. So that’s where the word, you know, just kind of fell off the map there is they just decided, you know, this is not a guy we can keep around. So and why was that?
David Ralph [12:37]
always pushing? Well, you always pushing? You know,
Steve Olsher [12:39]
because yeah, I can’t I can’t sit still man. You know, it’s like, I was talking to my wife last night. And believe it or not, ladies, I am actually married. Sorry. But you know, it’s like, when I was talking to my wife last night, I told her that my mind, you know, because we’re in California here and marijuana’s legal. So I’ll tell you, you know, I was high off my mind last night, and just sitting there, and that’s what I do my best thinking, and just sitting there, and I was thinking, like, Man, you know, my mind really works in a very unique way where I, as you know, it’s funny that the name of your show is join up dots, right? I mean, because that’s kind of how I have always been just wired is to be able to connect those dots so fast, where like, I get things, oftentimes will before others. And so when I was in any sort of environment where I was working for someone else, if I saw something that I thought, you know, could be improved, if I thought there was something that, you know, maybe we shouldn’t be doing, you know, even at a very young age, I was just kind of like, Hey, you know, why are we doing this? And not everybody likes to be challenged like that.
David Ralph [13:40]
But But you still need to have that competence to a challenge, don’t you? So many people will be in a job. And they’ll be thinking, This is stupid. Why are we doing it like this, but just do it? So where did you get that sort of competence to actually challenge the status quo?
Steve Olsher [13:56]
Whoo, good question. Right. And I think that just kind it goes back to the wiring, you know, and we either smother those elements of who we are, or we let them breathe. And it’s, you know, it’s a really good question, man. Because as far back as I can remember, I’ve never been was Matter of fact, I remember my dad telling me at a very young age, you know, something to the extent of, I don’t know, if you if you guys had to suffer through Top Gun there over overseas, but, you know, basically, you know, it’s kind of that that line of, you know, your, your body in your mouth is going to, you know, basically do things that you’re, you know, you’re unable to create checks that you’re unable to cash or whatever the, you know, the line is, I mean, that’s kind of what my dad was telling me is like, you know, that mouth is going to get you in in trouble and put you in situations that you’re not gonna be able to get out of easily on your own. So, you know, I look as far back as I can remember, I’ve been that way which is why honestly, when I started DJ gang back when I was 1718, the DJ name that I ended up choosing which my friends voted on and said hello, yeah. was Mr. Bold
David Ralph [15:03]
that works though, doesn’t it? know that you’re losing your hair but it works for the character doesn’t it?
Steve Olsher [15:08]
Exactly not Mr. Bald now now that would be Mr. Clean now he exists and he’s the one on your on your on your what is that bottle of detergent or whatever? that cleans your house? No, this is Mr. Mr. bold. And by the way, if you need to reach me, it’s 844. Mr. Bold one.
David Ralph [15:24]
We don’t do that over in the UK. This business is actually true. Do you do put letters in the middle of telephone numbers? You know,
Steve Olsher [15:30]
man, if you look at your phone, I don’t know if it’s that way. Like everywhere. But yeah, in the in the states here. And that’s always remember, like, way back when man that’s like how the old people used to tell each other you know, their phone numbers, call me at Michigan eight 2000, you know, or whatever it would be it like that’s, that’s an old school thing. Man. Did you think that
David Ralph [15:49]
when we are in that old school mentality when we look back, and this is me becoming old, old before my time? Did you look back on it with a nostalgia? Are you just excited by the possibilities of what’s going to happen in your life?
Steve Olsher [16:06]
Both man, you know, because like, my kids just got just started school yesterday. And I don’t know if that’s later, early. Bye. Bye overseas standards, but they just started back to school yesterday. And it? Man, I you know, it’s tough. You know, you look at the kids and got one going into sixth grade now one loan and a third grade. And, you know, I mean, look, man, while I’m optimistic about their future, and I love what we’re going to be doing. I mean, it still brings a you know, tear to the eye to see them gets so big, so fast. And what
David Ralph [16:39]
angellist your kids?
Steve Olsher [16:40]
So now almost 12 and almost nine, I was
David Ralph [16:43]
saying that their prime looking at you as a hero. And then the next minute looking at you like an idiot?
Steve Olsher [16:52]
No, mostly the ladder?
David Ralph [16:54]
And how do you deal with algae deal with that, because I’ve got kids that have grown up, and I’ve got younger ones now. And I see it time and time again, there’s a time when they literally look at you as a God, and they will follow you into the toilet and they will just want to be with you all the time. And then suddenly, they start to switch and they see you as a sort of slight embarrassment. Being the kind of man that you are being somebody that spins many different plates and in a creative way. Do they see that in you? Did they see that dad actually is a bit of a loose cannon? Or do you think that they like that about you? You know,
Steve Olsher [17:29]
I mean it, man? Yeah, I don’t know the honest answer. Right. I mean, they’re too young to be honest with their dad at this juncture. I mean, I think that there’s some question and admiration because they never see dad really work. So think in the back of their minds. They’re like, what the hell does dad actually do?
David Ralph [17:50]
Did you think they know if I was at school? Would they say my dad? Does something come up? You know,
Steve Olsher [17:56]
I don’t know, I know that they talk about me being an author, right? I know that they say that I know that my kids tell their friends. Oh, my dad is famous, which of course, is a relative term, I mean, just means that more than three people know me, I think to them. But you know, I think that there is an element of sort of mystery around who I am, which I think they appreciate where it’s not, you know, they have friends whose fathers and mothers go and do their work thing. And, you know, it is what it is. And they just have never, never seen that in me. I mean, I have been able to walk my kids to school every day since they started going to school, right. And they’re just when you look around, there just aren’t that many dads who are doing that you see a lot of moms doing that. But not a lot of dads, right. And so I think there is that essence of just sort of like, you know, that cool factor, right, that I think I’ve got going with them. But at the same token, you know, when they start getting out of line, then I’m going to break out the the most recent book that I wrote, which is called the belt, a step by step guide, raising responsible adults. So I’m just really going to put that down. And really, the way that this book is, is you open it up, and there’s like a big carve out in you know, in the pages, it’s actually no words in the book, you just open it up, and there’s a belt in there. And that’s really all you need to know about raising kids.
David Ralph [19:16]
So when you look at your life at the moment is your legacy that you are leaving for your kids, that kind of you don’t actually have to work at something you don’t like you can almost play enjoy yourself and become successful, would that be the kind of legacy that you would be very keen to leave?
Steve Olsher [19:36]
I mean, I hope so. Right? It’s, it’s interesting. And I think you probably are seeing this in your younger kids more so than probably your older kids. And by the way, I want to ask how you got suckered back into the kid thing. I mean, I’ve got friends, you know, that I got a buddy who had twins when he was 52. And I was like, oh, man better you know. And so it’s one of those things, man where, you know, I do believe that when you look at where sort of we’re at as a society as a whole, I mean, a universal global society, you can see that this whole concept of what work is, is let me put it this way, in the developed nations, the whole concept of what work is, is completely changing, I mean, to the tune of, you probably are going to see, most companies that are children will work for as having very minimal type of office space, right? I mean, they may have sort of like a central gathering space where people get together. But that’s going to be so different as the kids grow up. because more and more, you’re starting to see that people don’t need to work 40 hours a week, they don’t need to have FaceTime with their boss, you know, they don’t need to make those sort of impression shins if you will, that we had to make historically, as employees. And so that flexibility, I think is really going to be even more pronounced as our kids grow up. And the fact of the matter is that it’s not, I don’t want to say it’s easy to make money now, because it never has been easy. And it never will be easy. I mean, your podcast, it’s like, you look at it, and it’s it took you 400, you know, episodes, you know, to, to get to the point where you’re like, Okay, you know, things are solid, you know what I mean? Or maybe you did it sooner, but none of this stuff happens quickly or easily. And so there’s the, you know, it’s kind of a fine line that kids are walking between the instant gratification and doing something that actually takes work. But when you look at the global reach, and you talked about this earlier, the the ability for us to even talk right now, I mean is something that is frankly, a fair new phenomenon.
David Ralph [22:02]
But when it is and the fact that you can create your own environment, and you can create your own industry, and I talked about this a lot, but literally what you’ve done, and what I’ve done is create our own radio station, and in the years gone by, you’d actually have to go and try to get a job at a radio station. So you literally have got choices galore. But in many ways, that is a problem that I find, certainly with the people that I coach, they almost like to be given two choices instead of 100 choices. And with you going along being the alpha and in the films and all the things you’ve got going on, how do you channel those choices down into ones that are going to be valuable and play to your streams? Instead of looking at it and going? I don’t know, I could try this. I could try that. I could try everything. I don’t know which one to go for?
Steve Olsher [22:50]
Yeah, well, no, I think you’ve pretty much just defined my life. It’s, it’s, it’s one of those things, man, where’s the blessing and the curse? You know, it’s like, I have the ability to do a lot of things. And you know, I don’t say that to be boastful. I mean, it’s just the fact I mean, whatever you put me in, I will do well. So the question then really becomes, if I have that sort of capability, if I have that sort of talent, how do I apply it, and when you have talent that can be applied in myriad ways. It’s oftentimes very difficult to excel in just one because with that type of mind, you’re never satisfied. I mean, it’s just you continually moving and grooving and trying to do this, that and the other. And it’s, you know, might be the Add mind or whatever, but you just can’t sit still and rest on your laurels. Where even if you know, we look like when I put my book on the New York Times bestseller list. I mean, I don’t even stop and celebrate break open a bottle of champagne, nothing. I was just like, Alright, that’s cool. Now what?
David Ralph [23:56]
Well, why do you Why didn’t you go? Mrs. Gross? How many people have done this?
Steve Olsher [24:02]
Yeah, you know, and it’s interesting, right? I mean, it’s one of those things they can just never take away for from you. So I mean, for the rest of my life, you know, I’m going to be in New York Times bestselling author. I mean, it’s just kind of like, you know, you’re either a cancer survivor, or you’re not me, you either have herpes, or you don’t you know what I mean? It’s just like, that’s kind of the way it is. So it’s one of those things where, you know, here, Stephen, New York Times bestselling author, and that’ll always be there. But at the same token, you know, it’s just to me, it’s just another sort of moniker. It’s something that I can refer to, but I don’t sort of put the same stock in it, I think, as others do, because to me, it wasn’t, you know, I don’t want to say it wasn’t a big challenge. But I haven’t found anything really, in life to be a huge challenge, per se, where it was, like one of those things where I need to just stop and celebrate. I mean, even with my kids, you know, when my kids were born, you know, the doctor asked me to cut them vocal cord. And so while I was cutting it, I was texting. You know, I mean, I just I had things going on, you know, so, you just you I see, I see some people stopping to celebrate, and I get that. For me. I don’t know, man. You know, I just I think that and I hope that my kids honestly get the same syndrome here, which is that they’re never satisfied. You know, I mean, there’s something to be said for being happy and being content. But there’s also something to be said for being satisfied. I think there’s a huge delineation between the three,
David Ralph [25:27]
I think the issue is with you, sir, is at your core, you don’t want to believe I’m going to tell you this, I think that you don’t want to be defined. And the reason that you didn’t celebrate, because ultimately, your best days are ahead of you. So you don’t want to be defined as the New York Times bestselling author. It’s almost like yeah, okay, that was my last album. This is my next one. This is the good stuff that’s coming up. And your it’s your forward thinking, I was speaking to the lady who was the first lady to get up to the top of Everest on both sides. And we added this fat, fascinating discussion. And she said, the thing that annoys her quite a lot, to be honest. It’s the fact that people say what I just did, this is the first lady to get up to the top of Everest from both sides, because she said, I only stood at the top for 45 minutes. So I don’t want my entire life defined by those 45 minutes. And I think that’s what you’ve got, as well, I think you are getting to the top of the summit, but then looking for the next summit to keep going. So you don’t want to say yeah, that was it. I’m on on the next path upwards.
Steve Olsher [26:33]
Yeah, and I think that’s a reasonable assessment. Because ultimately, I think that there is, I can tell you this, it’s really easy for me to look at where kind of things are and in it, and it could be easy for me to become complacent. You know, I mean, for sure. But ultimately, I’m, you know, man, it’s like I am of that mindset, that, that if we have been given a gift, it’s really our responsibility, our obligation to share that gift, right, because ultimately, I know for a fact that you are the solution to someone else’s problem. I mean, there are people who are waiting for you right now. And if you rest on your laurels, and you hold that gift within, then ultimately, I mean, you’re really not just doing a disservice to you. But I mean, you doing a huge disservice to those who are literally on their knees praying for you to show up in their life. And what I firmly believe is that, you know, once they find you because you’ve honored those gifts, and you’ve done what it is that you’re truly compelled to do that serves them, then once you are in their life, and they can get off their knees, and they can stop praying because you’re there, well, then it’s time for them to start paying. And they should pay you exceptionally well and extraordinarily well for what it is that you do in your own unique way.
David Ralph [28:00]
Well, let’s play some words. Now that’s going to take us to the next stage of the conversation, but they are hugely powerful. And I think they apply to you very well. This is Jim Carrey,
Jim Carrey [28:10]
my father could have been a great comedian, but he didn’t believe that that was possible for him. And so he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
David Ralph [28:35]
So you obviously have taken a chance on doing what you love. But was it a big challenge? Was it a leap of faith? Or was it just something that naturally came to you? Do you buy into those words that Jim said?
Steve Olsher [28:49]
I do. And I mean, obviously, there, there are certain things born out of necessity. And when you look at Jim Carrey situation, he really was about as broke as broke could be, you know, and in that state of mind, I mean, you’ve really got two choices, you can either decide that this is going to be who you are, and that circumstance is going to be the definition of the rest of your life. Or you can take a look at what your opportunities might be, and choose to create a new way of being choose to create a new existence. So for him, you know, the the story is that he wrote himself, you know, a multi million dollar check and kept it in his wallet. And, you know, that sort of thing, because that was his goal. He wanted to be paid, you know, at that level, for his unique, unique abilities for his unique talents. And of course, we all know what happened to his, you know, to him throughout his career, which is phenomenal. But at the same token, you know, there’s plenty of other people who have written that same check habit in their wallet, and nothing’s ever happened. So, you know, the question is why, right? And let’s be real here. I mean, when you look at a guy like Jim Carrey, that is a talent in one specific arena. I mean, he happens to also be a phenomenal artist. And one could argue that he’s actually an artist, right? I mean, that that would be his core gift is, you know, is really just entertaining. But but more specifically through artistry, whether it be through acting or, or painting. I mean, I think in that same speech, if I remember, correct, that’s when he unveiled that, that huge 20 foot something painting that glowed in the dark, or whatever was pretty amazing. But you know, when you look at his life, and you sit here, and you say, you know, man, he probably could have done just as well if he was in business or doing something else? And the honest answer is no. I mean, I don’t think that he would have done nearly as well, because it’s not where that unique talent lies. And so what I believe is that most people end up choosing the wrong path. And they choose the wrong path, either out of necessity, because you have those responsibilities, and you have those obligations, or because of fear. And, you know, fear will drive you bonkers, man, you know, I mean, it will take the, you know, just it’ll cut you right at the knees. And there’s no doubt in my mind that I am. I’m probably operating on about, believe it or not, I’m probably about four of the eight cylinders, if you will, I mean, there’s another level that I can go to that because on four cylinders, I’ve been able to survive and do well, I haven’t really kicked it into that high high gear to really just crush it. No, can I just stop you there? So how do you know that you’re on your four cylinders? How do you know that you’ve got four remaining and you’re not at full peak? Because before as much as I’ve done, I’m incredibly lazy. You know, and it’s and I know, it’s sort of odd to say, I mean, I you know, I own liquor calm, I’ve done real estate development, I’ve done all sorts of things. And obviously, you know, I’ve got the show, and this, that and the other, which is all well and good. But I mean, when you look at the number of hours in the day, the number of hours in the day that I spend watching porn versus actually being productive and doing something, you know, is like, I thought back on and I was like, you know that 10,000 hour rule by Malcolm Gladwell. Yeah, yeah, I am an expert in porn, like, I have got that down, Pat. So if I’d actually like applied those 10,000 hours in a rational sort of reasonable sort of constructive way, you know, I can’t even imagine really where things would be. So I mean, look, you do I that’s how I know, right? I mean, because I know how many hours are in the day. And I know how many hours I really spend in that mode of creator in the in that mode of optimal productivity.
David Ralph [32:55]
Yeah. But the fact that you say that you’re lazy, but you’re doing so much in such a small period of time, surely, you’re operating on all eight cylinders, but you’re just doing it like a, like a drag car really fast for a very small period of time and been resting? That’s the best way of doing it in it.
Steve Olsher [33:13]
Okay, yeah, I’ll, that’s actually what I’m going to put I’m gonna go and you know, how, like, people have vision boards, I don’t have vision boards. But occasionally, I’ll just like put something on my desk because I need to cover something. So I’m going to get actually a piece of paper and print out, you know, the one of those race cars, you know, those drag stairs with the parachute thing in the back. That’s it. Exactly. That’s me. I love it.
David Ralph [33:32]
Now, well, when you’re doing that, and you are at your peak performance, what I have discovered over doing these 420 shows that people burn out, people get to a point where they are bootstrapping it themselves. And the farm, but I thought they were going to have when they start just isn’t there, it becomes a slog. Can you see that? Because it does sound for my side of the fence here, but it’s literally been fun, fun, fun for you. You’ve been playing playing all the way back from 1989 onwards, have you got to that point where you’ve literally had to reassess the direction you were going? Because it just wasn’t finally was just slug.
Steve Olsher [34:10]
Oh, yeah, man. And look, it’s
if if you know anything about me, then there are at least six people who do, they’ll tell you that, you know, I have those those highs and those lows, man, and actually in November of 2013. I mean, I really bought about like, you know, put me on suicide watch kind of bottoming out. Because, you know, that’s, I think a way of the Creator, to some extent is, you know, especially when you’re in any sort of sort of form of entertainment, you know, when you have that adoration of people, you know, cheering for you on stage, or, you know, calling into your radio show, or whatever it might be. And then the microphone turns off. That’s a tough place for a lot of people to be I mean, you can look at Robin Williams, right is a prime example. You know, Philip Seymour Hoffman, I mean, you know, Heath Ledger, etc. And so it’s really hard to get into sort of that gear of normalcy. So when you talk about, you know, the jet car or whatever, we’re going to refer to it as, when you look at that car and just, you know, just Hopper, it just floored it operating on all cylinders, peak performance. And then at the end of the race is like, you know, parachute comes out. And it’s like, the same thing. Generally, for me in my career, where I’ll just do something that is really like, wow, you know, I mean, that’s pretty damn cool. And then Moments later, you know, I can go literally, from the top of the mountain, down to the bottom of the cavern. And so, you know, it’s those abs in those flows that I think I found throughout my career, to be not only what prevents me from doing the stopping and the celebrating, but it also is, I mean, it really is something that drives me to always kind of move to whatever that next thing is. And so that’s why I wrote the book, man, because you know, in author land, they say that you write the book that you most need. And so what is your what discover the one amazing thing you were born to do? I mean, there’s really like the roadmap I wrote for myself, and the fact that it helps some other people. I mean, it’s awesome. But you know, I needed it as much as anybody. And that’s part of my, I think that’s part of the struggle, man is just, you know, it’s always a matter of man, is this really what I should be doing? And when that question comes up, which it often does, and you can’t figure out a clean way to get out, that’s where a lot of the frustration, that’s where a lot of the anger, that’s where a lot of the depression comes in. I think that’s where most people find themselves, when they’re in that situation, they really just don’t know how to get out of. So how did you get out about
David Ralph [36:51]
that suicide watch December 2013? And what a month, it was, what dragged you out? Was it your own mental strength? Did you you have a support network around you? You know,
Steve Olsher [37:03]
I mean, definitely my wife helped me through that. My dad came into town, he lives out of town, he came into town to be with me for that, for that period of time. And also, you know, it was interesting, too, because when I got to that point, it became really clear, like, you know, I need some help here. Right? So I ended up seeing a shrink, and, you know, this, that and the other and they did some testing. And what they found was really interesting. What they found is that my my neuro transmitter levels, right, the the oxytocin and dopamine, and serotonin, and I think there’s a couple others, whatever they might be, if you have a chart of zero to 100, you know, most people are going to be in the 60 7080 range for for those neurotransmitters in terms of how it flows through the system. Turns out that genetically, I’m predisposed to having super low numbers, I mean, to the tune of most of my numbers were in the single digits. So it doesn’t even matter necessarily what you want to do. Sometimes genetically, you can’t even do it, no matter what your your best intentions are. So for me, it became a function of you know, we got to balance the shit out. I mean, you you need medication. And like, literally, it’s made a tremendous difference. Because those numbers, I mean, they were literally off the map low. And there was nothing that I could have done in my life to change that it was already in the DNA.
David Ralph [38:38]
And did you struggle being who you are? Because people, when you get a certain level of success, people expect you to operate in a certain way. And you can’t really go into environment and go, No, I’m not going to be who you expect today, they kind of demand it somehow. Did you find that difficult to do the do when ultimately you just wanted to close the door and crawl into a boat?
Steve Olsher [39:00]
Yeah, you know, it, definitely. I mean, that depression, that sort of low area of my life that’s reared its ugly head for. And it really as far back as I can remember, you know, it’s just something that can be overwhelming, and no matter what you want to do. So I mean, literally, sometimes you just have to close the door, and just resigned yourself to the notion that, you know, today is going to be a crap day. And I think it’s simply a matter of acknowledging the fact and accepting the fact that it’s just not going to be the day you want it to be, and not doing anything stupid because of it.
David Ralph [39:47]
And it is a key point. But once you accept that life will throw things at you. And we’re going to play some words in a moment that actually emphasizes this, you can move forward, can you you can move forward, because you accept that it’s not going to be rose garden every single day, the sun will come out tomorrow.
Steve Olsher [40:05]
Yeah, you know, and it’s interesting, right? I mean, you use that expression, I grew up and lived in Chicago for 44 years and did my time there. And, you know, Chicago is a great place six months out of the year. I mean, as a matter of fact, it’s probably one of the best places on the planet, six months out of the year, but you just never know what six months it’s going to be. That’s the problem in Chicago. I mean, it can literally be like nicer in February than in May. And there’s a lot of cloud, there’s a lot of rain, there’s a lot of cold, you know, all of that. I mean, it’s kind of like London on steroids, really, to some extent. But when you look at the environment there, it’s not a good environment for someone who has these low neurotransmitter levels, and I suffered from seasonal affective disorder. Really bad, I didn’t really know what it was, until I started talking to a doc about it. And then you know, we got the lights and this and the other but I you know, it doesn’t do any good man, I had to get out of Chicago. And so we live literally, I mean, it was like it was kind of do or die for the family there in terms of whether or not we were going to stay together. Because I had told my wife early on, you know, like, within the first couple years of getting married, that I was like, you know, at some point, I’ve got to get into a situation where, you know, it’s warm, and it’s sunny, and it’s an environment that I love. And that was the breaking point there where she knew at that point, you know, we were going to have to get me into a different environment. And that literally required us to move. So we moved cross country from Chicago to the San Diego area. And you know, that certainly has made a tremendous difference. But But
David Ralph [41:36]
isn’t that what most entrepreneurs do? They create a business and then they create a lifestyle, and the two seem to work hand in hand. I haven’t spoken to many people, but go, yes, I was really successful. So I moved to Alaska, everyone seems to move to Florida, or California or Cuba, they all seem to go through the sun, because somehow it makes you feel better. And if you’ve got the opposite unity to feel better, and feel that sunshine in your head, you’re going to do it on you.
Steve Olsher [42:04]
Yeah, and, you know, there is definitely something to be said for environment. You know, and when you look at some of the places where people live, I mean, with all due respect, some of them are pretty damn ugly, you know, I mean, you look outside, and it’s just not a pretty place. And when you don’t love the environment that you live in every single day, that’s going to take a toll. Now, I don’t believe that you have to achieve that sort of level of success, if you will be for you can make that happen. I believe actually, it can work the other way around quite effectively, where if you move to that environment, I think that can actually become an impetus for putting your life in the order that you want it to be. But I just want to I want to make sure I touched on something real quick here. Because you know what you mentioned earlier, in terms of the awareness, it brings me back again, do something that I talked about in the book, what is your what, which is, Are you familiar with Dr. Thomas Gordon’s four stages of learning?
David Ralph [43:06]
Yes, I think so. But you go through it.
Steve Olsher [43:08]
So basically, there’s four stages of learning. And I don’t need to beat the horse and all of them. But most of us live in that first stage, which is known as unconscious and competence, where things happen to us in our life. And we just don’t know why. I mean, it’s like, we’re literally living in the dark. And once that awareness is created, it’s like the light switch goes on. And once the light switch goes on, you’re never going back. I mean, now you can make sort of a conscious choice about what to do with that knowledge. But ultimately, the light switch is either on or it’s off. And for me, you know, before I found out about the neurotransmitter levels, and so on, I knew this stuff was going on, but I really didn’t know why the light switch was off.
David Ralph [43:53]
is fascinating, though, isn’t it? But you you, you get the right answers at the right time in your life. You know, if you had a I’ve gone to that bottom point, more often than not, you wouldn’t have looked around for a solution, you would have just lived with it, you would have dealt with it. Did you see that? That’s a common problem with most people that they don’t hit that tipping point, they just kind of exist with what’s in their life.
Steve Olsher [44:17]
Yeah, and it’s, it’s interesting, man, because it’s kind of the difference between being awake and being alive. Right. And most people, unfortunately, are awake, and very few people are actually a lot. You know, and and there’s a huge difference between those two states of mind. And so many people will reach their deathbed, just kind of do what they need to do to, you know, make ends meet and put food on the table and keep the lights on. But that’s as far as they take it.
David Ralph [44:53]
So when are you most alive? In Steve you know,
Steve Olsher [44:57]
it’s interesting, right? I mean, conversations like this, you know, certainly are in that sweet spot for me, the coaching the teaching, it’s really all about, if you will, helping. It’s helping others, right. I mean, I think it’s when we get out of that, that place of self. And I think depression is largely built around the foundation of self, right where we just can’t get out of our own head. And so for me, when I am most alive, is when I am of service to others. And in that selfless state of mind, right? Like, you know, this, this interview probably won’t help anybody. But if it helps, you know, one person, then you know, cool, man, so I’ve done my job. But you know, it is that state of selflessness, it is that state of teaching it is that state of helping and assisting. And really taking those people who are two or 10, or 100 steps behind you on the path, and helping them see more clearly about what lies ahead. That’s what truly puts fire in my soul.
David Ralph [46:05]
And how do you judge your value for that? Because more often than not, what you’re saying, my listeners, my avatar will be going yeah, that’s how I feel. But how do they take that into business potential? How can I earn an income from it?
Steve Olsher [46:20]
Yeah. Well, you know, I mean, that’s where you go to what is your what.com, forward slash free little plug there? Yes. And you grab a free copy of the book, or you hire me, and you pay me a lot of money, and I’ll help you. But you know, ultimately, I do believe that most of us are too damn stubborn, to reach out for help. And it’s a shame because there are people who have knowledge that you could benefit from, and often all you gotta do is ask, right? And most people, if they’re halfway decent, are willing to help you. But so few of us are willing to ask for that help. And so, you know, look, man from from my perspective, again, there could be someone here, you know, who’s listening, and I hope that’s you, whoever you are. And this is, you know, the wake up call that you need. But if it’s not me, if it’s not, what is your what you know, it may be it’s strengths finders or Myers Briggs, or what color is your parachute or, you know, whatever those things might be that will actually leave you with more questions and answers. But that’s a whole different discussion. But you know, make sure that you get to the point of looking outside of yourself, for those clues for those answers, because they are out there. And beautifully enough, most of them can be found through our good friend, Google.
David Ralph [47:33]
But don’t you find it is coming full circle, again, it is the power of podcasting to be able to have these kind of unscripted conversations, which you wouldn’t, I don’t know, terrestrial radio, that would give it an hour of air time for something like this. But it will touch somebody, somebody out there will resonate. And funnily enough, some of my worst episodes that I’ve recorded, and afterwards I thought on it really didn’t hit home to me, have been the ones that I get more abundance about people. That is, you know, that’s the message that I was waiting for in that and I think, okay, there was value there, but I just couldn’t see it at the time.
Steve Olsher [48:09]
Yeah, you know, and it is interesting, right? How you never know what sort of impact you’re going to have on somebody. I mean, when I was maybe eight or nine years old, my brother was, and probably still is, we don’t talk. But anyway, he was, at that point, just, you know, he had a lot of mental issues. And he was at a hospital in a small town in Kansas that my mom and I would fly from Chicago on these little puddle jumpers to go and see him. And I remember being out there in that town. And I don’t remember that, I think to pick up maybe whatever it was, but we went out there. And one night just for recreation, we went roller skating. And you know, my mom was just kind of off doing her thing and roller skating and doing I was sitting there struggling and you know, climbing on the wall and slipping and falling. And this woman who was not my mom came up behind me. And she, you know, basically asked me if I needed help and lifted me up, and she skated around with me for, you know, two or three laps, just, you know, literally behind me, you know, kind of under the armpits holding me up and telling me you know how to do this and how to do that. And I’m sure for her, this was just something that she did, because she saw a child who needed some assistance, and probably doesn’t even remember it. But it was that interaction, that really opened my eyes to the fact that there are other people in this world, who are really good people, and who really have no agenda, and just want to do whatever they can do to help and that realization that some people help and do what they do without the expectation of reciprocation. That was that was new to me, because it I had never really felt that way growing up. And so you know, like I said, Man, you know, it’s like this episode, who knows whose ears it’s going to land in. And if it helps that one person and even though you know, you may come off of here and guy, you know, what the hell Steve talk about for an hour, there was nothing decent there. You know, I mean, but maybe, maybe there’s one gem there that’ll sit with somebody, and you and I would never know it. And it’s not for us to know. And you know, and most people won’t ever tell you.
David Ralph [50:39]
When you look back, I find it fascinating that you remember that that lady when you’re eight or nine was was that a key in your sort of lock where you’re armories hidden behind? Do you think that she turned a key and you started to find your true self?
Steve Olsher [50:54]
I do. I mean, I think that it was it was more a matter of being able to embrace the notion that you can do something good for others, without needing to be compensated for it, that you just do it. Because you see someone in need, and you can help them. And because you have that ability to help them if you don’t help them, you’re really turning your back on someone who you know, and again, obviously, there’s there’s myriad situations here. And skating around a roller rink is obviously a pretty tame example. But if you turn your back on someone who ends up, you know, pulling the trigger, God forbid, and you could have helped prevent that, because they just needed an ear because they just needed a hug, because they just needed something that you had the ability to provide. You know, that’s that’s some power that we cannot deny.
David Ralph [52:01]
The adults join up dots you don’t know when the.is going to appear in your life. But they join up
Steve Olsher [52:06]
nodding my head, I guess you can’t hear me nodding my head. I’m agreeing with you. Yes.
David Ralph [52:12]
No problem at all. Well, let’s bring the words on that created the whole show. And it’s the reason why we called it join up dots This is Steve Jobs
Steve Jobs [52:21]
Of course, it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards, 10 years later. Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future, you have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road, will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leaves you off the well worn path. And that will make all the difference.
David Ralph [52:56]
So do you buy into those words Steve
Steve Olsher [53:00]
I do buy into those words, it’s it’s just really tough, when you’re in the middle of it, that’s the problem for most people is they don’t continue down that path of Unknowing this, you know, because until you have the ability to see how it all connects, then it just seems sort of like, you know, reckless activity. And that’s the that’s the tough part, I think, for most people is the Adjust, there is no necessary the rhyme or you know, and reason to why things happen, how things happen, you know, unfortunately can’t be seen while it’s happening. And that’s what makes it so difficult. I think for most people to stay the course. Because you never know. I mean, you know, it could be 10 years down the line until it makes sense. And that’s a tough way for people to exist when they just are stuck in that state of Unknowing this. And sure. You know, it’s like, you know, Dr. Wayne Dyer, who recently passed, you know, I mean, he said that, in his book, real magic, he said that, everything that happens to us, no matter how painful eventually leads us to a place of higher value. And that’s all well and good, and it is true. But you know, when someone’s kicking you in the teeth, there’s not really much more of a lesson to be learned there, then I just, you know, I gotta go see a dentist.
David Ralph [54:30]
So So what would your big doctor be when you look back over your life? And you join up your dots? What was there a moment evil? Yeah, that that really did? Start me on the direction of the way I should have gone.
Steve Olsher [54:43]
Yeah, you know, it’s interesting. It’s, there’s, there’s one particular story that I’ll share with you that helped really get me on on path, I think. And it’s, it’s something I think that you can relate to, and I think everyone can relate to it. But it wasn’t, it really wasn’t until it was articulated in this way that it started to make sense. Long story short, I was with a golf coach, I tried to not be a hack, although I’m still a hack. But I had a golf coach at a period of time that when I was around 17, 1819, and I had been DJ for a number of years up until that point, actually, in the nightclub did some radio stuff as well. And I was contemplating holding my own opening my own nightclub. Now I was 19 years of age. And, you know, obviously, any endeavor run by a 19 year old is probably gonna hit some bumps in the road. Yeah, I mean, it’s just what are you gonna do? You’re so young and dumb, but you know, it’s just the way that it is. And I was thinking, like, you know, there’s probably a pretty good opportunity here, because I had a decent following. I was 19, I knew it couldn’t be a booze club. So I want to open it up, you know, non alcoholic club, we cater to the teenagers early, and then we close, and then we clean up and then we’d reopen for the adults. And, you know, because we didn’t serve booze, I know, we could stay open all night long. And this, so I thought was a really good idea. And I was talking to my golf coach about it. And he said, Well, you know, I mean, sounds like a good idea what, you know, what are you concerned about? And, you know, I kind of ran through the list of usual suspects, you know, I’m concerned about losing money, I’m concerned about looking bad, I’m concerned about, you know, not being able to recover. And, you know, all of the various things that we say the excuses, you know, that we throw in our own way. And he said, Well, remind me what you’re doing right now for money. And at the time, you know, I was DJ, but I also had various jobs. So I told him, I was DJ, I was waiting tables, I was pumping gas. And what he said was so incredibly simple, but so incredibly profound. And, you know, I mean, we have thousands of conversations, and millions of things are said to us, you know, over the years, some of them and most of them to me, not so nice. But you know, this one thing really just stuck with me to this day. And what he said was, he said, Look, man, you know, I think you should do the club. And you if things don’t work out with the club, you can always go back to pumping gas.
Unknown Speaker [57:05]
And it was just like,
Steve Olsher [57:07]
it’s like, wow, you know, I mean, it just, it really hit home for me, because it was like, he basically took that safety net that I thought that I needed in my life. And he ripped it out from underneath my feet. And he said, this is an illusion, you don’t need it. Because if push comes to shove, there is something you can do. You know, if it’s cleaning toilets, if it’s waiting tables, if it’s pumping gas, you know, if it’s bookkeeping, if it’s you know, tuning up bicycles, whatever it might be, there is something some skill that you have acquired over the course of your life, that you can always go back to that, if push truly comes to shove. And that, to me, was a huge turning point, because that’s when I really embraced the notion that most people won’t get to where they want to be in life. Because of the Jim Carrey story. You know, it’s the same sort of thing we hold on to what we think we most need. And in reality, what we most need is often the complete antithesis of what we have
David Ralph [58:21]
that lady on the the roller skating rink, she gave me the first came back and gave me the second one, I literally had an image of the change just dropping from you. And it was liberation, you could go and you could try things. And yet if it didn’t work, what’s the worst that can happen? You’re working McDonald’s or whatever, you do something. And that’s a, that is a liberating mindset that is so hugely powerful, isn’t it?
Steve Olsher [58:45]
It is and you know what’s interesting, and I don’t, you know, I don’t pretend to really understand what the laws are and whatnot do overseas. But I can tell you this here in the States, as crazy this might sound, the system is actually rigged to reward risk, because you can shoot and it’s like, when I did real estate development, I would work just as hard doing a project that would have a million dollars worth of value, as I would doing a product that would have $25 million worth of value. You know, what I’m saying is that there’s the same time you only have so many hours in the day, it was the same effort. But the reward was much greater. And so interestingly enough, I mean, here in the States, if you try something, and you bury yourself in a deep enough hole, you can bankrupt yourself out of it. Now, is there the stigma of you know, who that guy filed bankruptcy? Well, yeah, I mean, of course, you know, but it is what it is. I mean, it’s a word, you attach whatever meaning you want to it. But, you know, fortunately, less, you’re borrowing money from the mob. You know, no one’s coming to break your kneecaps, if you you know, if you if you lose money, you know what I mean? It’s just like, that’s the nature of the beast. So we actually are set up in a system where they reward risk. And I think that’s something that most that this, I think most people don’t get that.
David Ralph [1:00:15]
Well, it’s been a fascinating story. It’s been a fascinating conversation. But we’re at the end of the show now. And this is the part that we call the Sermon on the mic, when we send you back in time to have a one on one with your younger self. And if you could go back in time and speak to the young Steve, what advice would you give? And what age would you choose? Well, I’m going to play the theme. And when it fades, you’re up. This is the Sermon on the mic.
Unknown Speaker [1:00:41]
Here we go
Unknown Speaker [1:00:43]
with the best,
Unknown Speaker [1:00:51]
Steve Olsher [1:01:00]
That’s nice. All right, the Sermon on the mic, I’m talking to my, to my younger self, you know, reality is that I would probably talk to talk to the kid that was about 17. And at 17, I had actually I hated high school, I mean, just hated high schools, like it just wasn’t my background play drums, I was in the bands and all this and the other, but I just didn’t love it, it just wasn’t my thing. I didn’t peak in high school, I’ll put it to you that way. And I was sitting there one day, thinking, you know, I just got to get out of here, I had just graduated a semester early from high school, I was like, I gotta get out of here, I gotta go do something I need to get out of this environment. And I wanted to and I had the money because I had been working literally, since my teens and I had the money and I wanted to go buy a motorcycle, and just like kind of do that, you know, Zen and the Art of motorcycle maintenance, and just kind of hit the road and just go and or maybe easy riders a better example. But I really wanted to do that I thought it was something that, you know, would be liberating for me, I thought it was something that, you know, I just would really change the course in trajectory of my life in positive ways. But I was also thinking about it from the standpoint of, you know, I gotta get out of here, here being you know, with the failure, you know, with the family, and just in that environment. And yeah, I don’t know if I made the mistake of doing this, but I told my mom what I wanted to do. And she basically threw this huge fit and talk me out of it and said, if I did this, then that would happen. And this, that and the other. And I and I really just bought into that hook, line and sinker. But I think that would have even even more so than things are now would have taken my sort of risk aversion to a whole other level. And I wish I had learned that earlier, where I mean, I really didn’t learn about this, you know, this whole notion of being able to be who you want to be, I mean, risk and be sort of honoring who you inherently are two different things. But I really knew in my heart of hearts, that that was something that I had to do. And I didn’t do it. And so, in hindsight, what I would tell my younger self is that I mean, really, when you get that hit, when you get those goosebumps, whatever they are, you’re on the right path. And when you shut that down, that’s when you end up going in a direction that now well whatever you want to call it spirit or your soul or whatever it might be, when you fly against that you’re going to put yourself in a situation where you know nothing good is going to come of it. So I do believe that if I had taken that trip, my life at this juncture would be very different and I just don’t know what that would be but it’s interesting looking back knowing that that was something that I had intuitive hit on that it was something that I should have done and you know, to this day, I look back and I think you know I wonder where my life would be now if I had done it Steve
David Ralph [1:04:07]
what’s the number one best way that our audience can connect with you sir?
Steve Olsher [1:04:11]
Well, if if this hasn’t completely turned you off to connecting with me at all? I would say you know you start with with the book what is your what discover the one amazing thing you were born to do what you can grab for free at what is your what calm forward slash free. And if you like what you read there and you think there’s more for us to chat about then check out Steve ocean calm and and you’ll see a lot more on that site about who I am, what I do and how we might work together.
David Ralph [1:04:38]
Absolutely. And go over to reinvention radio, because it is a great listen if you’re into podcast because you’re listening to this switch off from join up dots for a couple of days and go and listen to Steve because it’s great fun. Well thank you so much for spending time with us today. joining up those dots and please come back again when you have more dots to join up because I do believe that by joining up the dots and connecting our past it’s the best way to build a few Steve Thank you so much.
Steve Olsher [1:05:02]
Appreciate you having me on.
David Ralph [1:05:06]
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