What Is Success Is the Subject On Today’s Steve Jobs Inspired Join Up Dots Podcast
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What Is Success And How Can I Find It?
What is success is one of those questions that we ask ourselves more and more nowadays.
Its not surprising, as from the moment we go to school we are being pushed towards success.
Teachers say to us “If you don’t work hard you wont get the results you need to get that great job”
Parents says to us “How are you going to afford to own your house if you dont become successful”
The issue is of course, most of these visions of success aren’t our own.
These are what others people have in their mind is success and they dont have any right to try to push it on to us.
It’s just wrong.
So in todays episode of Join Up Dots we answer the following listener question, and of course you can hear the full answer on todays episode.
The What Is Success Listener Question
Dear David,
I am long time listener of Join Up Dots even though I am only seventeen years old.
I started listening as I was hoping for help in finding success.
My parents are very driven people, and want me to get success in my life.
They worked hard for what they have in life, and want to see me do the same.
But what is success?
This is my problem as I am willing to work hard at something, but not if its not what I want to do or achieve.
Do you think that being happy and poor is as good as rich and unhappy, as i feel my life is going in that direction.
So what is success to you David?
I know what is success to my parents and family, but I dont think it is the same for me.
Thank you
Putri, Kula Lumpa, Malaysia
So Have You Defined Your Own Success?
If you are inspired by todays episode of Join Up Dots and are now pondering your own definition of success then we can help you.
Simply head over to the Freedom Starter course on our Free Training Resource and start doing the Love Like and Hate exercise.
This can really set your direction in amazing ways and give you the clarity that you need.
The second thing you can do, is head over to episode 207 of Join Up Dots and listen to the amazing AJ Leon.
This is an amazing episode that reveals the step that one man took to create his own rules and find his own thing in life.
Return To The Top of What Is Success
You can also check our extensive podcast archive by clicking here – enjoy
Full Transcription Of What Is Success Podcast Interview
Intro [0:00]
When we’re young, we have an amazing positive outlook about how great life is going to be. But somewhere along the line we forget to dream and end up settling. Join Up Dots features amazing people who refuse to give up and chose to go after their dreams. This is your blueprint for greatness. So here’s your host live from the back of his garden in the UK, David Ralph.
David Ralph [0:25]
Yeah, hello there.
Good morning to you and welcome to Join Up Dots.
Join Up Dots, it’s the Join Up Dots, you know, it’s what you’re listening to, you’re not listening to any other podcast, forget every other podcasts, just just delete them away, if you can find an app, like sort of Pac Man, but you could chase around all the podcasts in the world, just leaving one tiny little dot that probably turns you into a superpower Pac Man, then that’s it. That’s a good image, and it just popped into my head.
But wouldn’t it be great if you could destroy all the distractions and everything and just end up with that, that time when Pac Man kind of becomes the killer, and can go around eating and becomes blue or whatever he becomes.
That’s what life’s all about. Well, hopefully, hopefully, that is what Join Up Dots is all about. And it’s about eating the dots, joining up the dots and finding success finding happiness, and finding a sort of financial reward in a way that you want it.
Now, when I started Join Up Dots, I would say the first two, three years probably Yeah, about three years, I kind of I was podcasting.
But I didn’t really know what the listener wanted. And then it went through a phase of every listener that contacted me wanted an income online. And so I started sort of thinking, Okay, that’s interesting and developing that side of the business.
And that’s what we do a lot of we take people through the whole process, trying to join up all the dots. So at the end of it, you understand how online business works, because most people out there kind of teach you a bit of it, and another bit of it, but I’d like to do it.
And so you can take any business and have a good steer on what’s going to make it happen for you. But over the last Oh, probably since since lockdown, really, we went into lockdown about March, I get a lot more questions about happiness, contentment, and people just kind of looking at the world in a different way from what they did before where a lot of it was about more, more more, and driving forward, and being the sexy person, but they were born to be. And it’s tied up with sort of happiness.
So there has been a change in the world. Now, whether it’s a good thing or a bad thing that’s totally up to you. But whatever’s happening in the world in 2020, has made us stop and ask questions about our life. And certainly I remember when, when I was in lockdown, and I was forced to just kind of find things to do.
And the first kind of week, it was very much like I’m gonna do this job, and I’ll do that job. I’m gonna clean out the back of the cupboards, I’m gonna get rid of it.
And when you got to a point where you kind of done all that, so you were doing crazy jobs, like cleaning the outside gutters and, and drain pipes and just kind of looking at anything. And then it moved into sort of just being with practice, because I think most people, certainly I did run out of jobs. And so I was not coming up to Join Up Dots that much because I just didn’t feel like it. But I was sitting in the garden, pondering life and thinking to myself, you know, where are we heading? Where are we heading with 2020? Well, the listeners are doing the same kind of thing. And I’m getting far more sort of profound, deep questions. And I always answer them. As I say, I’ve said this before I always answer them by email, or I send personal videos through to you. Or sometimes I think, okay, that that’s a good one.
That’s a good one. For sure. And today’s one is from a lady called Putri I think it’s a lady’s name. I googled it To be honest, just to make sure and I think it’s a lady’s name Putri from Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. I’ve been to Kuala lumper very sweaty. I was in Kuala Lumpur. I literally was like, it was like being under a tap but a whole day. How would you live like that all the time, but I don’t know. But um, I mean, my armpits are good because I over overdosed on deodorant before I walked out. I thought it’s gonna be hot today. But you can’t sort of deodorised the rest of you can hear so you just saw sweat everywhere with very dry armpits?
No, I’m telling you that but anyway. So this is a question from Putri in Kuala Lumpur, and it’s a sort of sad question, but it’s a great question as well. She says dear David, I am longtime listener of Join Up Dots Even though I’m only 17 years old. So you must have started early must have started. I started listening as I was hoping for help in finding success. My parents are very driven people. Want me to get success in my life?
They worked hard for what they have in life and want to see me do the same. What is success? She asks, this is my problem, as I’m willing to work hard at something, but not if it’s not what I want to do or achieve. Do you think that being happy and poor is as good as rich and unhappy? As I feel my life is going in that direction? So what is success to you, David, I know what a success to my parents and family, but I don’t think that it’s the same for me. Thank you. Putri, from Kuala lumper.
And I thought, what a brilliant question. Because we go through life, don’t wait. And we get told by everyone, parents and teachers, teachers at worst, if you don’t knuckle down and pay attention, you won’t make anything in your life, you won’t get that top job. And they always put this fear in about, you’ve got to get your qualifications, and you’ve got to get your degree and you’ve got to move to university.
And there’s a conveyor belt, going through now, my son’s going through at the moment, and I’m supporting him, because that’s what he wants to do. But part of me kind of think it’s more about what you do in life, vain Bits of paper, you know, the world is littered with, you know, billionaires but dropped out of college or dropped out of school at an early age and went to work in some crappy job and really sort of just hustled and worked their way up to sort of billionaire status, I was reading about two guys, I’ve never heard of him until this week, who have just bought an Asda, now Walmart in America, but a shopping centre, we’ve got a supermarket range called Asda in the United Kingdom, and Walmart bought them a few years back.
And these guys, they’ve just bought it back. And now it’s the first time for like, 20 years that as the, our supermarket is owned by a couple of Asian billionaires from the north of England. And they simply started with their dad was running a petrol station, a gas station, as I say, in America and across the world.
And it was failing. So they decided to buy him out. This is from the memory of what I read. And so I bought out this failing petrol station, and they decided to make it more like a local supermarket. So you know, now you go to a petrol station when I was growing up, you just got petrol, and that was it. And now you can go there, and you can get almost a weekly shop. And they’re turning them into office licences. And it’s just like a kind of convenience location, where you go in there, and you can get your bread and your milk and all that kind of stuff. Well, anyhow, they started doing this. And it was really, really successful.
And so they bought another failing petrol station turned it around. And now I think they’ve got five and a half thousand of them. And they’re billionaires. And it all started with them just doing something based on the reaction to what their father had done. And fitting into that kind of way of life. They could see what he was doing. And they could see the failings. And so they knew how to turn it around.
And now they’re billionaires, which is, which is great. Now, what happens if your parents or your teacher are forcing you to sort of move into an area, but actually you don’t want to go? It’s not you? You know, your mum and dad do that. That’s not what I want to do. What should I have to do? Well, I think the first thing Putri is, you really have to define what is success? what is success to you? Is it about being really rich? Having a big house, having limousines and having big parties with Puff Daddy? Or is it just being simply happy? And not earning a lot of money? But not spending a lot of money? Do you watch these programmes on TV?
Big living in a tiny house, they’re on YouTube. And basically, a lot of these people are in these big houses and they’re paying rent and mortgages each year, and and every month, and they even decide what’s the point, I’m gonna work all the time to pay for this house. So I’m not actually living in this house. And they go from this huge kind of big house to like, almost like a shed tiny, tiny little properties, but they squeeze in a kitchen and they squeeze in a heating system and a bathroom.
And they changed their sort of outlook on life, I suppose, from being more focused on survival and paying the bills to spend more time with their family because they don’t have so many bills to pay. One of the things they do they take these big containers that you see on the back of ships, you know, they must be about, I don’t know, 70 feet long something and they put windows in them and they make them into houses, you know, really amazing except for upstairs upstairs.
They always squeeze a bed in where you’re basically sliding onto a bed because you’ve only got two inches of room. I don’t understand that. I don’t understand that at all. But they have decided that success isn’t about the big property and the house is about spending more time with the family now, for me to answer your question, I think that’s a lot of where I’m heading. And I did hate that. I mean, I’ve kind of deviated
just being free just having that ability to on a Monday morning. And this is like utopia for me on a Monday morning when I know everybody’s traipsing off to work like I used to. But I just been watching film on Netflix, and I turn on Netflix, it’s pouring with rain outside, got a nice cup of coffee. And I’m just watching a film when I know everybody else is traipsing off. Now. It’s not sort of big dramatic stuff. It’s not Porsches, it’s not Lamborghinis, it’s not all that kind of stuff.
But I value that. And so for me, success is about being able to live my life in the way that I want to live my life, if I want to go away for a few days, I can because I don’t have a boss anymore. If I want to, you know, fly off to somewhere I can, because I don’t have any restrictions. So success is my definition of freedom, I suppose that is what is success to me.
Now. I also look at it and I think to myself, you know, why is that not the same for everybody else? Why is success, not? what’s right for you? If you’re in a job that you don’t like, track it pack, join up the dots? And where you kind of lead where by somebody? Was it a parent? Was it a brother? Was it somebody, but you look at it now and you think to yourself, I know, this is what I do. But actually, it’s not making me happy.
Maybe I don’t need the big room on this corner of the penthouse or whatever. But there was a guy called AJ Leon on Google, Google him on Join Up Dots. Right. And let me I’m gonna google it for you because I can’t remember what episode he was on. But Join Up Dots, AJ Leon, and he was on episode 207 of Join Up Dots back in the day. Now, this is a brilliant story of a guy who basically was
on his own journey through success. He was working really hard. And he was really driven to get up the corporate ladder. And he got to a point where he broke his career down and he went against all the roads, all the rules when he found himself at a crossroads in life. Now, what he did, he followed the path that most expected he got good job. Yeah, great money. And he lived a great life that spells success with a capital S.
But then he got a big promotion. And the boss said to him, you know, this is your office, and it overlooks Central Park in New York or somewhere. And he went in and he closed the door, and he just cried because he knew that he was trapped. And he was trapped in a job that he didn’t want to do.
Even though it looked like success. It’s a great episode, AJ Leon. And one of the interesting things about this was, I read about this guy before I quit my own job. And I started to say to people, I’m gonna leave, I’ve read a story about this guy who got this big promotion, and he went into an office and he wasn’t happy because he realised he was trapped. And although, you know, it was what people thought he should be doing. He didn’t want to do it. So I’m gonna leave.
And then when AJ Leon, come on the show, I said to him, you were the reason why I left my job. Because I realised that that success that I had in that area, just wasn’t making me happy anymore. I’d rather be poor, and, and work things out and develop a business and income stream that made me happy. Then live a life that other people expected. So in answer to your question, so that was podcast 207, AJ, Leon, go back, just Google 207 AJ Lee on Join Up Dots.
And it’s a good episode that one. And so I think, as you say, Putri you know, what is success to your parents and family? I don’t think it’s the same for you. You need to understand what makes you tick? Is it freedom? Is it travel is adventure? is it helping people? Is it working with pets or in a job that maybe won’t pay you as much but you love getting to it each day and being in it? is it doing a job that maybe doesn’t pay? But you you really lose yourself in the process? You know, I know a guy at the moment that has just started building things with wood. And I worked with him for years. He actually introduced me to my wife, many, many years ago.
So I’ve known him for about 32 years. And he’s in a job that he doesn’t really like. But every weekend he goes into his mom’s garriage because he’s got all these tools set up there. And he started making things out of wood. And people can have this is lovely. This brilliant. I really like this. And he’s worked on this thing for Halloween, which are like boxes, with carved faces of jack o’ lanterns like carved pumpkins but they’re made out of wood. And then you can pack handling. And I don’t know how I don’t burn down, but he must have this plan. And people can. That’s brilliant. Phil, can you do this for me? Can you can you make some more.
And he started to make this new income based on this love of just going in there and getting these woodworking tools out and carving is not going to make him a fortune at the beginning. But if it makes him happy, and people start saying that they love it. And that’s success to him, isn’t it that that is where it all comes together, where you actually get rewarded for your efforts by people saying nice things. I think that’s how it works Putri. So it doesn’t matter what success is for anybody else. It’s what is success to you. And unless you know that, then you’re dead in the water. If you come over to Join Up Dots, and you go over to the pre resources, there’s a course that I’ve created that to help you get your big business ideas.
And the first part of it and I have spoken about is many times over the last seven years is about doing an exercise about the things you love the things you like, and the things you hate, and trying to find themes in it so that you can look at all the things that you love and think okay, yeah, there’s a lot to do with helping people or there’s a lot to do with being outside or there’s a lot to do with freedom, Meinl about travel and adventure and not having bosses and restrictions like that control.
And so I built a business around that. And it’s a really good exercise for everybody out there. You know, you don’t have to do the rest of the course it’s all free. But just do that and start looking at what you love. And if it’s what you’re doing at the moment when credit to you. But if it’s not been, you can change direction. You know, I give you a story. There’s a there’s an ad I connected with this morning Actually, I used to work with her years and years ago called Hannah Richards lovely girl. And we worked in an office and she was doing sort of paperwork and stuff. And I said to her, you know, is this what you want to do? And she said, No, she said, I really want to work with animals. I really like to work with, you know, packs and stuff.
And so I said to him, why don’t you get a job working in a pet shop. And she said, Well, it doesn’t pay much. I said, Well, you pay no payments, but it makes you happy. So she did. So she got a job in a pet shop. Now she’s a senior zookeeper at a UK zoo, dealing with the big cats and the bears. And so she’s gone from knowing what she loved to actually taking steps and it may not have got there straight away. But I think it was quite quick because it probably about five years or something.
And now she’s doing what she loves every day putting our wellies on and scooping up lion poo and getting in throwing me in and doing everything that she knew in her heart made her happy. She’s successful. And that’s what it’s all about finding this success that links to you links to your spirit, your essence. And even if it doesn’t bring you a lot of money, but it makes you happy every day, then I would say yes, successful. Thank you for that. Putri thank you for dropping this email.
Thank you for everybody else that drops emails and messages and stuff, you really helped me build the show because it becomes more and more relevant to what’s going out there. So if you’ve been thinking about dropping us a line and you haven’t got around to it, just come across, Join Up Dots, it’s very easy. Go to the contact page, and I will get it directly through to me.
And then you either get a message back, you’ll get some kind of free training or whatever I can do to help you move on because that’s what this show is all about. Until next time, my friends, have a lovely day. be successful. And the bottom line. Be happy to until next time. See you again. Bye bye.
Outro [18:47]
That’s the end of China. You’ve heard the conversation. Now it’s time for you to start taking massive action. Create your life. We’ll be back again real soon. Join Up Dots Join Up Dots Join Up Dots Join Up Dots. Joe Join Up Dots.
